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View Full Version : Classic Wrestling Captions


Loose Cannon
12-22-2003, 04:37 PM
Since there is no live Raw tonight, I thought I'd do some classic captions instead.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg
Tantaka, "I think I got some over there."
Billy, "Aw Gross, what did you eat."
Bart, "Holy shi** this stuff is glowing."

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg
Tugboat just found a coupon in his pocket for a free hamburgar with a purchase of a large soda.



http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg
Val was pissed when he found out that the belt he actually recieved was the International Heavyweight Title, a belt which had been defunct for quite some time.



http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg
And I want you to be a Four Horseman, call 1800-555-Flair.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg
Hall, "Hey knock knock."

Nash, "Who's there"

Hall, "WCW"

Nash, "WCW WHO"

Hall, "Exactly"


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg
The angle was originally suppossed to be Jake DDTing Macho Man on the steel steps, but Jake was a little high that day.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg
Bad News knew he shouldn't of attempted a sunset flip.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg
Someone gave these guys the wrong directions. They were suppossed to be heading to a Black Sabbath concert.


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg
Smash, "Hey AX, who is this guy."
Ax, "I don't know, don't look."



http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg
Sting, "This trophy is for a guy called Sting"
Camera guy, "That's you"
sting, "No Kidding"

Nowhere Man
12-22-2003, 04:47 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg
Needless to say, this wasn't exactly the response Booker T was going for when he asked for a push.

loopydate
12-22-2003, 05:12 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg

BART: Are you okay, man?
TATANKA: I just had a vision of the future. Bart, you win a "shoot" tournament, then get your ass kicked by Butterbean. I'm out of the wrestling mainstream altogether...
BILLY: What about me?
TATANKA: You...are an Ass Man!
All scream.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

Tugboat once again proved that he was the world's best Invisible Sword Swallower.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg

The Beast was happy he has won the European Title. Now if he could just get those stupid villagers to stop trying to torch his castle...

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg

FLAIR: Hey, you. Yeah, you. The one who's reading these captions. You got something on your shirt.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg

HALL: And I said, don't worry Booker. You'll be WAY more over if you go back to G.I. Bro!

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg

Jake was confused. He'd heard of Trouser Snakes before, but...aren't they supposed to come out the front of the trousers?

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg

Bad News Brown knew to dive and roll over the logo. Bret didn't see it and tripped.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg

Okay, everyone in the ring with talent, raise your hand.

That's what I thought.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg

SMASH: Isn't that your belt, Ax?
CRUSH: No, it's mine.
AX: I had a watch when I left the locker room...

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg

STING: How am I supposed to wear this around my waist?

DXJerky-Version 2.5
12-22-2003, 06:30 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

The hamburger coupon owns!


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg

FLAIR: NO, YOU'RE A HOMO! (classic pic with classic caption :y: )

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg

HALL: And he just got back into the ring, only to get injured again! Ha!
Nash: hey wait a minute...

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg

Jake tried desperately to keep the snake from biting, as the guy in the audience used parselmouth to exact his revenge on macho.


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg

STING: How the hell am I supposed to fit a whole Heinken Magnum in here? Huh? Tell me!

El Santo
12-23-2003, 12:20 AM
[QUOTE=Loose Cannon]Since there is no live Raw tonight, I thought I'd do some classic captions instead.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg
No matter how irate he got, Tatanka could always be calmed down with a soothing belly rub.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg
"Curses! The saleslady said that stripes would have a slimming effect!"



http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg
Val knew that he shouldn't have had that prune juice before the match.



http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg
Ric starts off his career as the ONE TIME, ONE TIME --- whoo! --- ONE TIME World Heavyweight Champion.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg
Nash always got a big laugh with Hall's --- ummm --- special brand of puppetry.


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg
Jake: "Awww, dammit! You landed on my snake."

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg
As Undertaker sees his Ministry for the first time, he begins to wonder what the hell he did to piss Vince off.


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg
Smash: "C'mon, strike a pose! Honestly, you two are the worst showgirls I've ever seen!"

KayfabeMan
12-23-2003, 01:23 AM
Vince's "Operaman" idea failed miserably,forcing Fred Ottman to go
to WCW,where he wore a mask to hide his shame....
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/06.jpg


Once again one of Vince's ideas fails,as he couldn't get Val Venis
over as "Macho Man 3000".....
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg


Nash couldn't control his laughter as Scott Hall asked him to drop
the title to someone else.....
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg


Jake Roberts' new job as WWF Fashion Consultant failed miserably,
after he attacked Randy Savage for not matching his boots with his
tights....
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg


Judging by the looks on their faces,even The Ministry had no idea
where the hell this angle was going...
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg


A rare picture of the ORIGINAL Demolition group is seen below (from
left to right): "The Shooter" Dean Malenko; Duane "Gillberg" Gill; and
Steve Blackman.....
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg


The sad thing is,Sting had this picture taken yesterday :( :nono:
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg

Vastardikai
12-23-2003, 03:51 AM
Let me try this captioning stuff again...

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg

Tatanka informed Tobey Keith and Tim McGraw which direction their careers would be going.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

This was the third time this week that Tugboat stole the poor referee's lunchmoney.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg

Venis: Lost ANOTHER loan to Ditech!

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg

Flair points at the funniest looking guy he's ever seen.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg

Jericho just told Scott and Kevin that he won't be held down in the WWF.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg

Jake: and don't EVER put out another Rap album again, GET IT?

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg

While Bad News tries to explain how a kick to the head will end his career, Bret exits the ring to talk to Vince, who he feels will never betray him.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg

Mark's mom grounded him for a week. He should have known that he and his friends should act out D&D scenes in the living room.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg

Smash: But a Biker Gang from Hawaii doesn't make sense!

Crush: It'll work and that's the end of it! Go Steal a Car or something!

Tornado
12-23-2003, 07:47 AM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg
<font color=#33ffff>Farooq: "UH....OH!"

Kane Knight
12-23-2003, 12:23 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg

"It's okay, kid. The gimmick was shit...What kind of moron would expect people to go for a guy with neon hair. What next? Facepaint?"

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

"OHHHHHH YEAAAAH! Payless sale!"

(Look at the Tank Top if there's any questrionm about that)


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg

The Ring Announcer accidentally announces Val as Hunter Heart Helmsley...


http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg

"UNCLE SAM WANTS YOU! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TO JOIN THE HOMOSEXUAL ARMY RESERVES! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg

After Rob Van Dam visited WCW, Nobody was quite themselves.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg

"Wait...You're not Hogan!"

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg

Early experimentation with a gravity switch.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg

"One Thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme to explain in due time
All I know..."

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg

"Is my Mascara running?"

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg

RVD's visit claims another victim.

Savio
12-23-2003, 02:00 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg
Hall: I think im a good wrestler

http://secure.wrestlingsuperstore.com/superstore/product_images/2085.jpg
Studies show that this is not the missing head of Rey

http://wpics.hypermart.net/individuals/kane/kane_xpac1.jpg
Kane: Fr.....fr....friend??

ColdwaVer
12-23-2003, 04:00 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg
Billy: We just got our asses beat, didn't we?
Bart: Yeah, but I've got great news.
Tatanka: We get a rematch?
Bart: No, I just saved a ton of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico.
Billy: I can't feel a heartbeat.
Tatanka: That's my stomach, jackass.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg
A disgruntled fan shot Tugboat in the back, but the big sailor was saved by a salami he was aging in his tank top.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg
Val tries out for the title belt discus team.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg
Somebody shoot YOU in the head!

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg
Hall: And then Vince said we'd crawl back to WWF someday!
Nash: I think I tore my quad.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg
Savage later insisted that Jake and the snake were sent after him by "Hulk Hogan's people."

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg
Luckily Bret reached for the Canadian penny just in time.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg
The Undertaker insisted on a booth in the nonsmoking section, so the Ministry had to wait.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg
Smash: Holy crap Crush, that's one hell of a blade job.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/s/sting/25.jpg
Wow, if I put this in my pants I'll look really hung!

ColdwaVer
12-23-2003, 04:02 PM
http://secure.wrestlingsuperstore.com/superstore/product_images/2085.jpg
This severed head represents a graphic depiction of Vince's plan for the Cruiserweight division.

http://wpics.hypermart.net/individuals/kane/kane_xpac1.jpg
Kane exhibits his ability to produce midcarders from his crotch.

McFly
12-23-2003, 07:50 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg

Tatanka needed to get serious medical attention after he saw "THE VINCE"

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

Tugboat didn't win the match, but he did just save money on his car insurance.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg

Venis was going to kill D'Lo for putting that HEAT RUB in his jock.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/r/ricflair/34.jpg

Flair obviously cannot point to his knees. :D

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/o/outsiders/01.jpg

Hall: And then as he carried our bags, Hunter whined, "I'm going ta be a main eventer sometime. You'll see."

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/6/snakebite.jpg

Kid w/ Glasses: It's FAKE!
Jake: WHOA! IT LOOKS SOOOOO REAAAAAAL!

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/wm04/02.jpg

The BEGINNING of the END

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/m/ministry/02.jpg

When HHH came on stage back in the good old days, this is the wonderful reaction he got from his competitors.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg

Smash: Look I didn't steal Axe's watch! I have NEVER stolen and I will NEVER STEAL ANYTHING!
Axe: Wanna bet?

Corkscrewed
12-24-2003, 12:57 AM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg
As you can see, Val Venis did NOT use Preparation H.

FranchiseFan03
12-24-2003, 10:32 PM
http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/ppv/ssl93/3men-sslam93.jpg

Bart: I'm going to Japan the WWF sucks..
Tananka: I need a real job, I'm tired of playing an Indian..
Billy: Screw this where's Vince? I need a new gimmack.

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/v/valvenis/09.jpg

Val Venis was angry to find out that the "Big Show" name was given to Paul Wright instead of him when in fact he's a no show..

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/d/demolition/05.jpg

Axe: I want a belt.. Lets get the WWF to make a six man title.
Smash: Sh*t he's gone nuts, this isn't WCW!
Crush: You think I care?

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pic/f/fredottman/01.jpg

Tugboat realized the Earthquakes begin each time he eats White Castles!