RAW Captions: 01/31/05 !

[Gone Mad]

Hey, guys. Last set of captions that will be eligiable for this month's best caption contest. So, have fun and go through all this month's cap threads for more of a chance at getting chosen and next Tues., the best caption contest will begin. And man, you guys should see the banner I did for this... LOL!

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[Gouda]

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Shawn: EDGEDOUKEN!

[Hired Hitman]

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Triple H: So it's agreed, You and I will face each other at Wrestlemania for this microphone.
Batista: :|
Triple H: haha, I'm only kidding, it will be for the Championship...Hey you're alright.

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Like him or hate him, you got to admit Muhammad Hassan is one of the best damn chiropracters the WWE has ever seen.

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Shelton Hated to admit it, but Simon one uped him when he swtiched the Simon System pills for laxatives

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Shawn Michaels proved that he still had it when he made Edge hot, his knees got weak & he sent a chill down his spine.

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Sylvain Grenier's French-Canadian Vampire gimmick didn't turn out as good as he thought it would.

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The Referee shows Batista some hand gestures to help him with his new Politician Gimmick.

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Shawn Michaels couldn't believe how bad the pedigree has become.

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The WWE's all male version of Hamlet mixed with Romero & Juilet was an instant hit!

That'll do :o

[Gone Mad]

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HHH: Hello, son. How's it feel to be an all-American?
Batista: I gotta pee.
HHH: Hehe... HE'S GOTTA PEE!! OOORTTTON!!!
Batista: ..oh god.

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Hussan: I will not stop until you get me over like you did for Orton!!
Slaughter: Uh... about that...

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Do not ever challange HBK at DDR... ever!

BTW, I love that sign! :)

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Beniot: Hey, what's your number, bab-- Oh.. nevermind.
Jericho: stupid short haircut.

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Batista: LET ME IN!
Ref: Sorry, "No shirt,no hat, no service".
Batista: ..........NO ONE ELSE IS WEARIN' HATS !

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HBK: You know, Randy, that if there was a pic of this, it will be played off as gay.
RKO: Now rub my hair, like th-- WHAT?!??!?!?!

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kANE: Who's in the cage now, O'Haire?! Who's in it now?! AHAHAHAHA!!!

.....oh shit!

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Let the battle of the Cheese Grater of Death, commence!

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Kane (to himself): Turn, you bastard. Your nose shall be mine!

.end.

[NoJabbaNoBogRoll]

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Camera men in the corner, courtesy of WrestleButts Magazine.

[El Santo]

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HHH: "I must say, sir, it's an honor. I loved you in Reservoir Dogs!"

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In an unexpected, purely reflexive reaction, Hassan was suddenly whisked back to the good ol' days when he gleefully ripped off the heads of his little brother's GI Joes.

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Benjabin may have been an excellent technical wrestler, but who knew he could botch something as simple as shaking hands?

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Micheal proved he could still carry a good match despite having lost half his right leg in a freak accident.

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JBL's RAW invasion goes horribly awry.

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The minute Jericho turned his eyes away, Benoit KNEW who it was who drew the funny lines all over his pants.

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Batista was as shocked as anyone when the ref started doing the Bushwhacker dance.

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Meanwhile, Michaels was suddenly possessed by the spirit of a drum majorette.

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Shawn knew it was childish, but, with everyone in the ring unconscious, who WOULDN'T use a sharpy to draw funny moustaches on their faces?

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Kane should have known that, when wrestling in the far reaches of the universe, there was always that one in a million chance of getting caught in a Tholian Web.

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Kane: "Dammit, I told you last time you were here... I don't want any damn Encyclopedia Brittanicas!"

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Kane: "Lookee here, Ma! I gots me another wife!"

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Oddly, Snitsky didn't lose much credibility after he jobbed to an inanimate chain link fence.

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Kane had been in feuds with unhygenic wrestlers before. But, when Snitsky started to take a whiz in the middle of the ring, Kane decided he'd seen enough.

[Impact!]

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HHH: and now its time for you to decide who you wish to job to, me or JBL
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the move wasn't that painful, but the fact the hassan was happy to see him was
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shelton benjamin: POUNCE!
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you can dance, you can dance, everybody look at your pants
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KAAANNEE

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i want your bod
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the refs invisible pole dancing immpressed batista
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HBK's river dancing wasn't enough to stop HHH making edge give him head
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HHH caught under his glass ceiling is slowely crushed to death, while HBK pulls orton out from under it just in time
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although it looks like kane is angry he's really just getting a better view of trish's cleavage
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and i will love her, and pet her, and call her george
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nobody was watching the match, but were wondering who the giant arrow was pointing at
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[Blue Demon]

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WEEEEEEE...look at me, I'm Zach Gowan!!!

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well thank God the open air human debris field is still ok

[Xero]

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(Seconds later.)
Gene: Are you okay?
Cage: .......
Gene: Cage? CAGE!?
Kane: It's an inanimate object you basket case!

[Jonster]

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Jericho: I can't believe we just did that.
Benoit: Let us never speak of it ever again and no one will ever know...