New GI Joe posters up

[Kane Knight]

I'd have added this to the old thread, but since old posts aren't searchable....

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=52320

http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew1.jpg


http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew2.jpg


http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew3.jpg


http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew4.jpg


http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew5.jpg


http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew6.jpg

[Fignuts]

lol why are all the gi joes in black? Wasn't individuality the whole appeal of the toys?

[D Mac]

http://comingsoon.net/nextraimages/gijoenew2.jpg

Kobe Bryant! :shifty:

LOL Marlon Wayans as Ripcord

[Kalyx triaD]

lol why are all the gi joes in black? Wasn't individuality the whole appeal of the toys?

Covert special forces better be wearing black. I'm more interested in the vehicles.

[Jeritron]

lol why are all the gi joes in black? Wasn't individuality the whole appeal of the toys?

That's exactly what I said when the first wave of pics came out last year.

Also, this movie looks terrible.

[Fignuts]

Covert special forces better be wearing black. I'm more interested in the vehicles.

Since when is everyone on the gi joe team covert ops? Like 99% of the time it was "in your face, storming the castle gates" type action. There was rarely any stealth involved outside of snake eyes.

[Kalyx triaD]

True, but what you are asking of this 2009 feature is to honor a system of attire that had at any time wildly colorful ninjas, stereotypical sailors (complete with talking parrot), and pro-wrestling soldiers who battled with no visible gear. The Joes were in your face, but they were also prone to singing their own theme song at impromptu concerts. Let's welcome some revisions.

[Jeritron]

How about just don't make the movie? I mean, if there's not a good way to do it why do it? It's not written in history that this has to be made.

With that being said, I think they could have found a better common ground between flamboyant and dull though. If they had to make the movie, why not give what made GI Joe liked a tip of the cap at least.
They don't need to be neon ninjas and multicolored camoflauged like the cartoon, in order to be diverse and visually distinct characters.

The only thing they got right is Snake Eyes. Haven't seen it yet, so who knows. Visually, and cast-wise, it reeks of shit.

[Fignuts]

Kalyx, again I find your forgivness of major revisions too lenient. I've said it before. I'm all for revisions to the source material, as long as they make sense and improve the film. And I realize that making a straight adaptationwouldn't work. But as Jeritron said, they coul have come to a better compromise than sticking everyone in a black suit and calling it a day. EVERYONE IS IN BLACK. Bad guys and good guys, with the exception of storm shadow. Sue hope there arn't any night scenes, cause I won't know what the fuck is going on.

[Fignuts]

Oh and back when I was a kid, gi joes weren't THAT flamboyant. They had individual qualities but they still were kinda "keepin it real" somewhat. That was when all the memorable characters were around too. The neon superhero looking crap and ninja stuff didn't come til later.

[Kalyx triaD]

Aside from Ray Park, the cast is odd. I hear the dude playing Cobra Commander is a hoot, though (caring enough to channel Chris Latta's slithery voice, which is more than what Starscream got in his one English line of dialogue in TF).

Really, I'm not a 'huge' fan of GI Joe - not on par with TF or Superman anyway. I still have an above-average set of knowledge about them enough to care about what's going on in production. And a complaint I don't have, is the team wearing black. I just don't see the garish attire from the past that essential to the product, and I can see something like GI Joe being presented in a host of ways without the old attires.

Again, I am fixated on the vehicles. That made Joes for me. I better see something way more elaborate than Abrams and Humvees. I'm talkin Hisstanks and Snow Cats.

[Kalyx triaD]

Kalyx, again I find your forgivness of major revisions too lenient. I've said it before. I'm all for revisions to the source material, as long as they make sense and improve the film. And I realize that making a straight adaptationwouldn't work. But as Jeritron said, they coul have come to a better compromise than sticking everyone in a black suit and calling it a day. EVERYONE IS IN BLACK. Bad guys and good guys, with the exception of storm shadow. Sue hope there arn't any night scenes, cause I won't know what the fuck is going on.

Oh I agree, I hate everyone in black. I emphasize with the decision, however, in regards to what Sommers is up to. Me? I'd simply have modern updates to all the costumes just as other superhero movies have done. I always saw each Joe as a superhero in their own right, so that's how I would have done it. Sommers isn't smoking that pipe, he has different ideas, and he's doing well by what he's going for. Joes as a special ops team? Fine, put them in black.

That's how I see it. And yeah, I tend to be very forgiving with live-action versions. I guess I subscribe to the idea that 'at least they're making it', and 'I don't have to see it if it offends me to a certain degree'. Ask me about the Tekken movie if you wanna see me riled up, though.

[Fignuts]

Vehiclesare def more important, I agree with you there. But as I said, in the heyday of gi joe, the attire wasn't garrish. At least not on the joe side. FTR, I'm ok with how the cobra side looks in the movie, so far.

[Jeritron]

Vehicles aren't going to make a good movie though. Characters are. I can understand the connection and the enjoyment of it, but that's only an added bonus. They will mean nothing if the characters and world they are in suck.

So let's hope for good actors and distinctly developed characters. Not feeling a Wayans brother and Denis Quaid. Isn't the kid from The Lookout and 3rd Rock From the Sun playing Cobra Commander? He's not a bad actor, but if so that's terrible casting. Awful.

And yea, I'm all for revisions too. Some of the best adaptations have made revisions that helped them be better movies than they ever would have imagined being if they had followed the source material religiously. The key is reconciling reality with the source material in a way that makes it presentable to a live action, real life world, and also keeps what made it a hit intact.

I don't have a good feeling at all on this one. There could be infinitely better visual diversity in this. It is a GI Joe movie after all.
They do have to remember they're making a movie based on action figures. And though I do agree that it shouldn't end up like Street Fighter 1994, it doesn't have to be handled like some dead serious navy seals movie either.

It's not like Transformers made all of their robots one solid grey color. They kept the diverse looks.

[Kalyx triaD]

A red truck would have to become a red robot, though. :)

Kinda bummed that the movie takes place in the near future. No foreseeable chance at a TF/GI Joe crossover. I even had a thought that the army guys from TF would end up becoming the Joes in some spin-off.

[Jeritron]

I also get the vibe that this movie is going to attempt being very serious. Like dead serious. That will be a major mistake and result in bad things.
It should be fun. I can't stress enough that, yes, we want a good movie but it's also based on action figures/a cartoon! It should be fun.

[Jeritron]

For example, it should be closer in tone to Iron Man and Transformers, than to The Dark Knight. Looks like they're serious fuckin business with a lot of stuff.

[Kalyx triaD]

Looking at Breaker and Storm Shadow, I'm guessing that they're not going for The Dark Knight's dead serious tone.

[Jeritron]

Looking at Denis Quaid's face, I'm guessing they're going too serious.

[Jeritron]

Fuckin Denis Quaid. And a Wayans brother.

[Jeritron]

Also, note the release date. August. August releases for a movie like this show the studio doesn't have much confidence in it. August is the month where the studios release summer style blockbusters that don't quite stack up, like The Mummy 3. Chances are, given the name brand of the franchise, this movie could have been a July release, like Transformers.
It also could mean that the studio didn't care about it being good. They saw it as a potential 100 million dollar total gross with a forgettable profit, and put very little into it. So they slapped it with a shitty cast and crew that was affordable, didn't give it much of a budget, and took the simplest and cheapest script possible.

It could be good. Again, I haven't seen it. I think a live action G.I Joe movie has, or had, potential to be good. I just don't see it here.

[Juan]

this is gonna suck.

[Fignuts]

The superbowl trailer is already online over at superhero hype.

Looks like a decent popcorn action flick, but if it weren't for the little snake eyes/storm shadow bit, I never would have guessed it was gi joe.

[Jeritron]

It just disgusts me that it's being treated as such a low rent go around though. It could be a retro hit, if they didn't treat it like a sci fi channel movie, or your average shitty action movie. Suprised Jason Statham isn't GI Joe himself.

[Blitz]

Link to the Superbowl teaser: http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=52443

[Jeritron]

Does anybody remember Sgt. Savage? Around the Mid 90s they had this animated storyline where Sgt. Savage is this old GI Joe that gets thawed out from WW2, and saves the day in modern times.

I loved it. Ate it up. The figures were amazing too, since they were slightly more detailed and bigger than regular G.I Joes. They all came with VHS tapes of the cartoon mini-series.

I'm not talking about G.I Joe extreme, or whatever that shit was. Those were terrible figures. They were new GI Joes with like no articulation and they were roided out looking. Kinda like street sharks.
Awful.

SGT. Savage though. The goods.

[Jeritron]

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I love that. General Blitz! He was badass. Clearly a nazi.

The figures were amazing. I forgot about the screaming eagles too. The commercial didn't show it, but the line included a badass WW2 fighter plane. It even had the shark face paint on the front of it.

The commercial reminded me of the music, and the awesomeness of the whole Screaming Eagles group at the end.

[Jeritron]

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I loved those Street Fighter GI Joe crossovers too

[Jeritron]

and of course the ninjas

[Jeritron]

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OMG those toys at the beginning were amazing. That plane. This is the cartoon too btw.

[Blitz]

Ninja Force was the fucking shit.

[Jeritron]

I reccomend watching this cartoon. If you love WW2 stuff, and/or GI Joe's, it's amazing. This was my favorite thing for a while as a kid.

[Jeritron]

lol at the basketball game

[Kalyx triaD]

Superbowl Trailer:

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Holy flipping ninjas, Batman!

[Kalyx triaD]

The superbowl trailer is already online over at superhero hype.

Looks like a decent popcorn action flick, but if it weren't for the little snake eyes/storm shadow bit, I never would have guessed it was gi joe.

I think I saw Firefly in one shot. Lot's of absurd action in there.

[Jeritron]

lol after I called it out on being Mummy 3 territory "from the director of The Mummy"

[Kalyx triaD]

Sommers didn't direct Mummy 3.

[Jeritron]

That wasn't my point. I don't really keep track of the names of the guys who direct those awful movies. I meant Mummy type quality.

[thedamndest]

Is John Cena in this?

[Kane Knight]

I don't care if the costumes are black leather. If you can tell them apart in other ways (weapons, action, personality), it's fine. The teaser doesn't show us much one way or the other. This might be fine, but we don't know yet.

[mitchables]

Looks ridiculously over fx-ed. And the little "RISE OF COBRA" subtitle screams "we're planning sequels". Ugh. I dunno. I'll see it out of morbid curiosity.

[Kalyx triaD]

If you think this wasn't made with sequels in mind you are nuts.

And yeah, I totally heard a voice that sounds like Cena in the trailer. And come to think of it, Cena would be awesome in GI Joe.

[Kane Knight]

Looks ridiculously over fx-ed. And the little "RISE OF COBRA" subtitle screams "we're planning sequels". Ugh. I dunno. I'll see it out of morbid curiosity.
Yeah, a sequel or two would sure be in poor taste for a license with such taste and discrimination.

[Kalyx triaD]

I'm sure Cannes frowns upon subtitles. And there goes awards season for the Joes. Shoot.

[Kane Knight]

I'm sure Cannes frowns upon subtitles. And there goes awards season for the Joes. Shoot.

There's still Sundance.

[Kalyx triaD]

Spot your toys.

http://www.earth-2.net/wallpaper/full/GI_Joe_001.jpg

[Krimzon7]

Dammit, I miss my fucking childhood.



:'(

[Kalyx triaD]

Cobra Commander, though there's gonna need to be some reverse imagining on your part. There's gonna be some deformity there, I wonder if his cartoon origins will be bought to light (without the eyes, I hope). (http://www.toyark.com/news/attachment.php?do=fullview&attachmentid=3890)

[Jeritron]

lol why

[Krimzon7]

The eyes creeped me out.

[Sting Fan]

Anyone got links to GI Joe comics online?

I have a few in my collection but GI Joe seems ridiculously hard to find in NZ.

[Kalyx triaD]

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[Jeritron]

Looks even worse than I thought

[Droford]

Hopefully this will bomb so disastrously that it will put an end to the 80's cartoons on the big screen trend before it can reach the b-level cartoons unlike what has happened with the Comic Books turned movies trend.

[Shaggy]

In the trailer when they are given those superpower suits the first thing that came to my mind was Power Rangers.

[Kalyx triaD]

In the trailer when they are given those superpower suits the first thing that came to my mind was Power Rangers.

...Why?

[BCWWF]

The only one that I like at all is Cobra Commander. The rest don't have a GI Joe feel.

[Shaggy]

...Why?

Only because this suits make them more powerful...but it reminds me more of the Power Rangers movie just because the suits in the movie had a much harder look to it than the cloth type suits from the series.

[Kalyx triaD]

I'd say they seem more like Iron Man with the bulk armor.

[Fignuts]

First minute of that trailer is awesome, cause it screams gi joe and is exactly what it should be.

Then the accelerator suits come in.

[Fignuts]

Hopefully this will bomb so disastrously that it will put an end to the 80's cartoons on the big screen trend before it can reach the b-level cartoons unlike what has happened with the Comic Books turned movies trend.

Why? As long as they are fun to watch, keep making them. Transformers was a blast, and beyond that accelerator suit nonsense, this will still be a fun action movie.

[bigdaddysuperfreak]

Im gonna guess that those are supposed to be the sigma 6 suits.

[Fignuts]

Wasn't sigma 6 some bad cartoon that got canceled after one season?

Great job picking the source material.

[Kalyx triaD]

Never saw Sigma Six, didn't agree with the art style. Fucking hate the Acc Suits in this movie. It's just wrong to me, like they're artificially adding super-human shit for no reason. And at best I'd have Cobra use it rather than the Joes.

[Sixx]

I had a laugh when I found out that that little prick from Third Rock From The Sun will be playing Cobra Commander.

[Kalyx triaD]

A little prick playing another little prick? I mean if they are going for Cobra Comedic, that is. What I've seen seems to point at that portrayal.

[Sixx]

First minute of that trailer is awesome, cause it screams gi joe and is exactly what it should be.

Then the accelerator suits come in.

Huh? I`ve watched it twice in a row and heard no gi joe scream.

Besides, who would ever advertise a film by saying that it`s the same director as from the Mummy.

[Kalyx triaD]

Number one, The Mummy was great. Number two, you're taking "scream" too literally.

[Fignuts]

Well it made a lot of money, and was good for a summer action flick. I mean, whenever I go to these types of movies, I'm expecting exactly what I get. Not cinematic genius, but a good time if you don't take it too seriously.

I think a lot of people watch them looking for things to criticize, and I just don't see the point. Why go in with such a negative attitude, when you can relax, and I don't know, actually enjoy it a bit?

[bigdaddysuperfreak]

Wasn't sigma 6 some bad cartoon that got canceled after one season?

Great job picking the source material.
Yeah unfortunately my sons have it on DVD.

[Fignuts]

Like, I'm not going to sit here and put transformers in my top ten favorite movies, but I was still able to really enjoy it.

I hear people saying how bad it is, and I feel really sorry for them, that they can't enjoy giant transforming robots kicking the shit out of eachother.

[Kalyx triaD]

Well it made a lot of money, and was good for a summer action flick. I mean, whenever I go to these types of movies, I'm expecting exactly what I get. Not cinematic genius, but a good time if you don't take it too seriously.

I was referring to Sixx's "scream" retort.

[Kalyx triaD]

No reason to battle over this.

[Kalyx triaD]

Gonna use the quote function a lot more now.

[Fignuts]

I've made this arguement like 10 times on here, and no one ever listens. Probably because no one ever takes me seriously, cause I usually post about dinosaurs, and Clark Gable.

So I guess treat these movies like a fignuts post, and you will like them.

[Sixx]

Well it made a lot of money, and was good for a summer action flick. I mean, whenever I go to these types of movies, I'm expecting exactly what I get. Not cinematic genius, but a good time if you don't take it too seriously.

I think a lot of people watch them looking for things to criticize, and I just don't see the point. Why go in with such a negative attitude, when you can relax, and I don't know, actually enjoy it a bit?

I think Mummy sucked and so does majority of my friends, so maybe I took it for granted that everryone does. Anyway, how else can I take 'screams' if not literally? No sarcasm, I really don`t know.

[Fignuts]

I was referring to Sixx's "scream" retort.

I wasn't talking to you.

DON'T YOU FEEL SILLY

[Sixx]

I think I`m getting confused.

[Fignuts]

Anyway, how else can I take 'screams' if not literally? No sarcasm, I really don`t know.

What, seriously?

You've never seen the word "scream " ued in that context?

Such as "Bioshock's gameplay screams of system shock two."

Basically to infer that two things are very similar?

[Sixx]

Awww, fuck, didn't think about it. Might be a little slow considering its almost 6 am here.

/excuses

[Kalyx triaD]

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I fucking hate those suits! It's just a cheap way to 'super-power' the Joes and I think it undermines an otherwise fun looking movie. The suits themselves aren't a bad design, and power suits could have a been a concept used for some other movie. But in this context, they suck.

[Kalyx triaD]

And the Baroness doesn't seem to have her accent.

[LuigiD]

I agree about the suits.
They look like something they stole from a Halo brainstorming session.
I think it kinda takes away from the originality of the characters.
oh and all the characters look like they have a leather fetish.

[Kalyx triaD]

http://moviesmedia.ign.com/movies/image/article/996/996130/gi-joe-rise-of-cobra-20090618111003993.jpghttp://moviesmedia.ign.com/movies/image/article/995/995568/gi-joe-rise-of-cobra-20090617103113861.jpg

They should just have a movie with these two. No power suits, just ninja-awesome.

[Kalyx triaD]

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[Shaggy]

I think the younger kids will love this movie like crazy and the merchandise will sell..... other than that the older audiance will like that their kids liked it but just like those with out kids...will believe their child hood has been raped.

[Kalyx triaD]

Raped childhood? C'mon...

http://i65.photobucket.com/albums/h230/Kalyx_triaD/queen_spades-1.jpg

[Shaggy]

Yep...Drama Queen....thats me

[Kalyx triaD]

I was more tossing it at the comment and I recognize that the statement wasn't yours. So... lighten up. Unless you do subscribe to that 'rape my childhood' bullshit, whereas I have a full deck for you.

[Kalyx triaD]

http://moviesmedia.ign.com/movies/image/article/100/1002531/gi-joe-rise-of-cobra-20090709055003471.jpg

[mitchables]

I'll be interviewing Stephen Sommers and Rachel Nichols next week. Anybody have any questions they want me to ask?

[Kalyx triaD]

I'll be interviewing Stephen Sommers and Rachel Nichols next week. Anybody have any questions they want me to ask?

What have you learned after lensing the Mummy movies that you applied to GI Joe?

Can you imagine your version of GI Joe sharing a universe with Bay's Transformers?

Would you like to direct a crossover of these two franchises?

(I personally believe Sommers would be an ideal replacement if Bay left TF)

[mitchables]

Actually I'm thinking if I ask you guys if you have any questions, I should do you the justice of posting the responses too. Which means Jeri gets one for his Gibbons question as well. I like the crossover one in this case. Will probably steer clear of The Mummy if I can help it, if only because I've only got 10 minutes.

[thedamndest]

What are you already asking?

[Kalyx triaD]

Cool.

[mitchables]

I kind of had to sign an embargo that states I won't review this until the 2nd of August, but I really enjoyed it. Snake Eyes vs Storm Shadow is the feud of the year. That's probably all I can say without somehow getting in shiatloads of trouble.

[Kalyx triaD]

Well I'll be damned.

[Kalyx triaD]

Not really, Steven Sommers is good shit.

[mitchables]

He seemed like an absolute dude. I asked him about the Joes/Transformer crossover. He was not enthused.

[YOUR Hero]

So. I'm trying to figure out why this Baroness was running around in the top clip Kalyx posted? She served no purpose. She jumped in the elevator, went on the roof, jumped into a plane. Why? She did nothing. That seemed dumb and unnecessary.

[Kalyx triaD]

Dude, it's a clip.

[Kalyx triaD]

Also: Extraction.

[Boondock Saint]

Been hearing good things about this, surprisingly.

[Buzzkill]

This movie looks epicly bad. Like, not Transformers bad, much much worse

[Kalyx triaD]

This movie looks epicly bad. Like, not Transformers bad, much much worse

Well actually...

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Lookin kind of fun.

[YOUR Hero]

Dude, it's a clip.
OHHHHHH!


I thought it was the whole movie.

It's a bad clip.

[Jeritron]

I would tell you again how bad this movie looks, but Kalyx is policing such things

[Kalyx triaD]

*Taps baton in hand*

[Shaggy]

So i was thinking about this movie today and is anyone else expecting it to end like the Street Fighter movie ended...

That scene at the end where they all posed and it freeze framed on them as it went to credits...

Only difference would be they all yell "YOOOOOOO JOE!"

[Vastardikai]

I've actually seen a graphic novel that possibly follows the plot of the movie...

Oh god, I hope it's NOTHING like that.

Duke used to be in love with Baroness
The Baroness ends up being the sister of Cobra Commander.
Snake Eyes is "like a brother" to Scarlett (A step up from the tv show to be sure, but can't Scarlett just love the guy?)
We see Storm Shadow's face.
Storm Shadow dies at Snake Eyes' hand
Zartan has a bit role
Destro's ancestor was apparently the Man in the Iron Mask...

[Kalyx triaD]

So i was thinking about this movie today and is anyone else expecting it to end like the Street Fighter movie ended...

That scene at the end where they all posed and it freeze framed on them as it went to credits...

Only difference would be they all yell "YOOOOOOO JOE!"

No.

[Fox]

92% on RT right now.

[Jeritron]

92% on RT right now.

Yea but it's not being screened for movie critics. Only a select few bloggers from sites that they know will like it.

It's actually causing quite a contreversy. It's common for movies a studio thinks will suck to not be screened for critics, but not big releases.

[HeartBreakMan2k]

Saw the movie today. I felt like I was watching a power rangers movie staring the wayans brothers and darth maul.

[The Genius]

they should have just gone with a re-release of the 1987 gi joe movie.
also wtf is up with cobra commander being renamed The Doctor..according to imdb at least.
http://www.80sreborn.com/images/gi-joe-movie-4.jpg
http://www.80sreborn.com/images/gi-joe-movie-1.jpg
http://www.80sreborn.com/images/gi-joe-movie-2.jpg
http://www.80sreborn.com/images/gi-joe-movie-3.jpg

[ClockShot]

Think about taking the plunge and going to see this. But Destro without the chromedome and the things I'm hearing about Cobra Cmdr. are holding me back.

Will this be worth the $6.00?

[Kalyx triaD]

they should have just gone with a re-release of the 1987 gi joe movie.

Really?

[Kalyx triaD]

http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/io9/2009/08/whatstheotherhalf.jpg

[Vastardikai]

Really?

I'd have rolled with it. G.I. Joe the Movie was one of my brightest childhood memories. Up there with Transformers the Movie.

http://www.80sreborn.com/images/gi-joe-movie-2.jpg

Between this image, and Hitler's outfit from the "Inglorious Basterds" trailer, I think I can go with one thing.

Villians NEED capes.

[Kalyx triaD]

You suck.

[YOUR Hero]

Was expecting some reviews by now.

[mitchables]

G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA
***1/2<O:p
Director: Stephen Sommers<O:p
Starring: Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Dennis Quaid<O:p
Review by Mitchables
It can be difficult for movies based on toys to work on an adult level, since most toys don’t necessarily have rich and intricate back stories that are strong enough to base entire films on. Kids don’t care about that stuff. Kids care about melting their army men in the microwave, bless their easily distracted souls. So it’s fortunate for the parents of those children - and the children of parents who are now too old to be taking their kids to the movies – that G.I. Joe, the seminal action figure and latest Hollywood re-imagining, actually has a deep and lengthy history that has been well tapped for director Stephen Sommers’ live-action adaptation of the Real American Heroes, albeit with some creative liberties of its own.<O:p
The premise is simple enough: Super-secret best-of-the-best military outfit headed by ultra-disciplinarian General Hawk (Quaid) recruits Army BFFs Duke (Tatum) and Ripcord (Wayans) into the fold to retrieve stolen futuristic nanotechnology from the shady Cobra Organisation. Hilarity, sexual tension, high adventure, and giant explosions ensue. And ninja fights. Awesome ninja fights. <O:p
Taking its cue from other recent film adaptations, The Rise of Cobra balances respect for its source material with accessibility for a wider/brand new audience. It’s an origin story, so the viewers are pulled along for the ride with Duke and Ripcord and essentially experience the film’s events as they do. There is obviously some divergence from previous incarnations, which is largely unavoidable when adapting anything, much less a story that has already been developed through toy-lines, multiple TV series and animated films, some video games, and a bunch of comics.
The casting is spot-on: Channing Tatum screams All-American Hero, while Sienna Miller’s Baroness and Rachel Nichols’ Scarlett are both more than capable of showing that although they are beautiful and classy women, they would absolutely ruin your shit if you so much as glanced at them wrong. Marlon Wayans is the big surprise here as he shows extended range beyond being the wacky African-American offsider to which he could have so easily been relegated. Ray Park and Lee Byung-hun bring the hurt as rival bad-ass ninjas Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, providing some of the most satisfying on-screen swordplay since Star Wars Kid hit the internets. Really, the whole film is undeniably well-cast, which lends it a great deal of credibility.<O:p
A particularly refreshing aspect of G.I. Joe is its global approach to its story. While the film could have culminated with New York or Washington being the inevitable target of deranged villains, Sommers and Co. whisk us away to Gay Ol’ Paris via deserts and the Arctic. This dispels the notion that the movie is a thinly veiled glorification of the American military and instead conveys a sense that this is a grand, visually appealing and ultimately fun story, provided you’re into that sort of thing. A final note, though: There can be such a thing as too much bullet-time. But now you know – and knowing is half the battle.<O:p


Lifted directly from the mag I write for.

[YOUR Hero]

3 1/2 out of 10.

That's terrible!

[mitchables]

Out of 5.

[YOUR Hero]

So I'm guessing there is no buzz for this movie now that it's been seen?

3 full pages before it's release and nothing but one coaxed review since?

[Jeritron]

All I know is the movie hit the theaters and it's much-cited, pre-critic 93% on rottentomatoes turned into a 39%

[Jeritron]

I'll probably see it on video but I supspect its just noise and explosions

[Blitz]

I think anyone who's seen a preview for this should know what's up. I am literally only going to see this to see how the Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow relationship is handled.

[Kalyx triaD]

The movie is pretty fun. I liked it.

[wwe2222]

3/10

This movie sucked all the way around.

[wwe2222]

G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA
***1/2<O:p
Director: Stephen Sommers<O:p
Starring: Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Dennis Quaid<O:p
Review by Mitchables
It can be difficult for movies based on toys to work on an adult level, since most toys don’t necessarily have rich and intricate back stories that are strong enough to base entire films on. Kids don’t care about that stuff. Kids care about melting their army men in the microwave, bless their easily distracted souls. So it’s fortunate for the parents of those children - and the children of parents who are now too old to be taking their kids to the movies – that G.I. Joe, the seminal action figure and latest Hollywood re-imagining, actually has a deep and lengthy history that has been well tapped for director Stephen Sommers’ live-action adaptation of the Real American Heroes, albeit with some creative liberties of its own.<O:p
The premise is simple enough: Super-secret best-of-the-best military outfit headed by ultra-disciplinarian General Hawk (Quaid) recruits Army BFFs Duke (Tatum) and Ripcord (Wayans) into the fold to retrieve stolen futuristic nanotechnology from the shady Cobra Organisation. Hilarity, sexual tension, high adventure, and giant explosions ensue. And ninja fights. Awesome ninja fights. <O:p
Taking its cue from other recent film adaptations, The Rise of Cobra balances respect for its source material with accessibility for a wider/brand new audience. It’s an origin story, so the viewers are pulled along for the ride with Duke and Ripcord and essentially experience the film’s events as they do. There is obviously some divergence from previous incarnations, which is largely unavoidable when adapting anything, much less a story that has already been developed through toy-lines, multiple TV series and animated films, some video games, and a bunch of comics.
The casting is spot-on: Channing Tatum screams All-American Hero, while Sienna Miller’s Baroness and Rachel Nichols’ Scarlett are both more than capable of showing that although they are beautiful and classy women, they would absolutely ruin your shit if you so much as glanced at them wrong. Marlon Wayans is the big surprise here as he shows extended range beyond being the wacky African-American offsider to which he could have so easily been relegated. Ray Park and Lee Byung-hun bring the hurt as rival bad-ass ninjas Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, providing some of the most satisfying on-screen swordplay since Star Wars Kid hit the internets. Really, the whole film is undeniably well-cast, which lends it a great deal of credibility.<O:p
A particularly refreshing aspect of G.I. Joe is its global approach to its story. While the film could have culminated with New York or Washington being the inevitable target of deranged villains, Sommers and Co. whisk us away to Gay Ol’ Paris via deserts and the Arctic. This dispels the notion that the movie is a thinly veiled glorification of the American military and instead conveys a sense that this is a grand, visually appealing and ultimately fun story, provided you’re into that sort of thing. A final note, though: There can be such a thing as too much bullet-time. But now you know – and knowing is half the battle.<O:p


Lifted directly from the mag I write for.

you thought this movie was well cast? are you kidding me? the casting was terrible in this.

[Kalyx triaD]

Subjection.

[Fignuts]

The Paris scene was the only really cool part of the movie. Everything else just felt like a generic action movie. Cobra Commander was pretty sweet, but he's only in it for a short period. That kinda sucked.

[Fignuts]

Also, wtf no Hiss Tank?

That was one of my favorite toys as a kid, and it was like THE cobra ground vehicle in the cartoon. Lame.

I remember the night raven tho, so it was cool to see that.

[Kalyx triaD]

Yeah, I actually found Commander kinda cool and scary. But he gets like 3 seconds of camp time then credits roll.

2hr trailer for a sequel.

[Jura]

Didn't have anything special to it except the Storm Shadow/Snake Eyes fight. Would have been better if they casted someone else as Duke and they should have made Cobra Commander sound snakey instead of like Megatron.

[Blitz]

Yeah just watched this. Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow and Joseph Gordon Levitt were the only saving graces.

[Sixx]

I loved it, but I was drunk.