[CSL]

some more mini JBL blogs

When I say the wrestling world was the traveling circus when I started-that is an understatement. We often worked every day of the week and double shots on weekends-our whole life was wrestling. When I first started even to my time with WWF I traveled with at least three to a car and most oftentimes four people in one car, and the same 3-4 in a cheap motel room. My first traveling companions in Texas were General Skandor Akbar, along with Killer Tim Brooks, Black Bart and/or Dirty Dick Murdoch. I later rode with Dick quite a lot especially after Bobby Duncum Jr started wrestling with us. In Japan every day was Groundhog day, wrestle at night and get on a bus the next morning with all the guys and go somewhere else to do it all over again. I worked and lived in Europe for two years and we literally lived like the carnival workers-in trailers behind the wrestling venue-we would wrestle in the same town for up to eight weeks. I had no running water and no bathroom-had to go into the arena for both. Or, when we were in Vienna we lived on a campground outside of town and I had restroom facilities I shared with rest of campground. It was in Germany I went to a little circus to see all the animals backstage, and a couple of workers were talking Carny (a kind of pig latin wrestlers talk that is derived from the word carnival, the carny guys would talk this language so as to not let the “mark” no what they were saying so they could take his/her money. The term “mark” actually came about out of the shell game where a person was literally “marked” on the back with a piece of chalk or similar to let the guy running the game in on who they were taking money from), anyway as I was standing there these two guys are talking about me in carny-not saying anything bad, just commenting. So, to their surprise I answer them-they failed to realize that is where we got our language. When I first got into WWF I rode with four guys and we stayed all four of us in the same room at a cheap motel. We weren’t making much money and needed to save every bit of it. Al Snow, Kane, Dutch Mantell and Tom Prichard were my first riding partners. Later it was Ron Simmons, Godfather and Teddy Long-that was a crazy car! In between it was Barry Windham and I along with Goldust. The ribs that were pulled were unbelievable. When you are that close to guys for a long time you have time to really develop a rib-and guys took pride in doing just that, and never owning up to them which was an art also, even if caught on camera guys would deny, it was hilarious stuff. The ribs were non stop as well. The famous plane ride from hell was nothing, it was just reported. Now, all that has changed and for the better I must say. But it’s hard to not miss the crazy old days, or at least look back and smile. Mr Perfect and Owen were two of the best. Mr Fuji and Johnny Valentine were two of the most feared. All ribbers. Guys used to wear bandaids over their eyebrows on planes so that if they fell asleep no one would shave their eyebrows off. Pony tails had no chance if someone passed out. And, more than one guy/gal has had their bags used as a toilet. Poor JR was one of the guys who had to deal with guys when ribs got out of hand. And, I must say he handled it unbelievably well-I was fined a couple of times by JR and it’s hard to believe that a guy who is taking money out of your pocket, rightfully so both times, you could still like-but that was JR’s magic. However, I was not even in the league of the top ribbers-they worked at it full time. Needless to say JR has seen it all several times over. At TV a couple of years ago “they” were going to have Big Dick Johnson rib JR after TV went off of air. So BD Johnson goes out to the ring strips down to his thong and starts dancing all over JR squirting JR with baby oil. BD is on JR’s announce table. JR calmly stands up, punches BD in the “lower” region, collects his notebook and walks to the back. Simply AWESOME! One of the biggest ‘pops’ ever for the backstage guys watching monitor. BD grabbed what had just been punched up into his belly and fell off the table as JR calmly gathered his stuff and walked to the back. And, JR-classic-never said a word, just got his stuff said goodbye to all and left the building. Incredible to see. Moral? Don’t rib an old timer!

Owen Hart was the biggest ribber of all time. Davey Boy was so scared of Owen he would register under a different name in his hotel room-and they were brothers in law and travel companions. Davey was just as bad. Owen lived to both rib and save money. Owen would travel with fans, stay with fans and eat with fans to save money-I never thought Owen was cheap, he wasn’t-but it was a game to see how little money he could spend on the road. Davey’s favorite line, “I wasn’t even there, it was Owen” was pretty much his standard answer to anything. I traveled the circuit with Owen and Davey in six man tags with the Godwins and Bart Gunn. Owen would call out spots to fans while Davey Boy was calling the same spot in the ring. Owen would talk to fans the entire match critiquing Davey Boy’s moves. There was not one sane moment with those two. Davey would just laugh; he thought Owen was hilarious even when Owen was ribbing him. Both could go though. Davey and Brett had one of best matches I have ever seen in Berlin and Owen was one of the best-they just loved to rib. They both were born for this business. Owen loved to get the muscle guys to press him, he would then hang on to them where they could never get him up-Davey would then come in and press Owen over his head several times and Owen would yell how strong Davey was. The Godwin’s pigs somehow ended up in Vince’s office one day and as always, Davey explained, “I wasn’t even there.” Davey’s bulldog was given a laxative one day at TV, needless to say the suspect list involved only one person. Clarence Mason, remember the attorney, was tortured by these guys in one loop we were on so much so he got to where he wouldn’t come into the ring. One day as he was holding the tag titles up on the apron, with his back to ring-Las Vegas was the city- I hit the ropes by him and knocked the belts into the stands along with Clarence. Needless to say the match, Owen and Davey felt the need to outdo me after that, turned into a ribfest as most of them did. To give Owen credit he deserves, he always carried bags and never checked anything so he could get off plane quicker to see his family when he got off of road. He and Davey were awesome guys both. The best story I have heard on Owen was when Chief Jay Strongbow was the agent and as WWE often does-they wanted everything real, as it would be in a shoot. So, Chief asked Owen if he would do that in a fight and Owen’s response, “No, I would hop on one leg whooping like an Indian!” It took Chief sometime to get over his anger, hilarious. I was wrestling a few matches after Owen died in KC, I can’t remember if I was next or a couple after, a terrible tragedy. WWE was Owen’s playground-a guy who loved the business and loved to rib non stop and somehow no one ever got mad at him they just loved him more and more-as did I.

Eddie Guerrero was like a brother to me the last few years we were on the road together, I loved the guy and often dressed next to him in the locker room-Eddie was one of my groomsmen in my wedding and I did part of the eulogy at his funeral. Eddie really meant a lot to me and my family. On the day he and another good friend, Kurt Angle, got into a fight backstage I was sitting next to Eddie’s bag when the fight broke out at “Gorilla”. Right before you exit to go to the ring there is the first TV control room-Gorilla position, headed by Vince McMahon. The other TV control room with Kevin Dunn (best producer in TV, imo) is located in the TV truck in a separate part of the arena. In the Gorilla Position the agents stay with the folks that are producing talent-for the most part cameras and cameramen are directed from the truck with Mr Dunn. Gorilla was named after Gorilla Monsoon who manned this place for years. Eddie, like all Guerreros, had a wonderful temper, lol. I love the Guerreros, but those guys will fight each other if no one else is around. And, believe me; Guerreros are afraid of nothing and no one. They are all great down to earth guys that I have always loved being around. In a match with Kurt, at TV one day, something didn’t go right and as they came back to Gorilla an argument ensued resulting in Eddie leg diving Kurt at the start of the fight. The fight was broken up quickly but it soon made its way back to the locker room. I had no idea what was going on as the pull apart continued in the back. Eddie was now beside me, with people standing in front to stop the fight, staring at Kurt who was at the door being held back by John Laurinaitis and several others. I finally gleaned through all the ruckus that Eddie and Kurt had already gotten into it, it was broken up quickly, and Eddie had leg dived Kurt. John Laurinaitis shut the door separating Kurt and Eddie So now (I can’t remember if it was only Eddie and I in the locker room or if a few more guys were in it)-, however, I’m the only one sitting next to Eddie on a bench-Eddie is fuming and saying nothing. This is important to the story-Kurt Angle won a gold medal. That means that he wasn’t just good at wrestling, it doesn’t even mean he was great-it means out of 5 billion or how many people there are on the earth, no one could beat him! Put in a different way-he was the best wrestler on the planet and proved it. Kurt had neck problems at this time and later joked to me, the animosity lasted only minutes between Kurt and Eddie, that Eddie-who was known to be quite the fighter, could have had a chance punching him but trying to wrestle him was the one thing Kurt felt very comfortable with. Remember, the second, third and all the other best wrestlers in the world tried this and failed. So, now it’s just me and Eddie. I’m looking at him and he isn’t acknowledging me-he’s just staring at the door that is now closed, it’s getting kinda funny. So, I casually ask him (his eyes are bloodshot he is still so mad)-“Why would you leg dive a gold medalist?” Without hesitation and still looking at the door he replies loudly, “Because I’m stupid!” I started laughing and finally Eddie did too, we laughed about that often. Needless to say, Kurt and Eddie were good friends both before this and after this-they had a little blow up is all-but the ending to it was a classic.