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Everything you said wouldve been valid had the penultimate episode not occured. They resolved all their conflict, and had a genuinely great moment as a family, and then arbitrarily reneged on it. Thats what was unearned. They concocted a plan, plan went according to plan, and then abandoned the plan for the sake of abandoning the plan.
Now obviously the penultimate episode (409?) Only existed to create the "shocking twist" and its in that that it felt lazy and unearned. Its the same methodology Damon Lindleloff loves so much and it rarely feels good as a viewer. You didnt trick the audience the betrayed your characters and when the chracters are written so well as they are here it stings all the more.
Its not the conclusion thats the issue or the betrayal. Its the misdirection before it. The hard pivots in both directions are at odds in a thousand different ways none of which are organic.
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