TNA Sickness (brought to you by Dorian Yates ProPeptide Whey Protein Powder!)

[The Naitch]

*A video montage of the Invasion is shown*

Dorian Yates WHEY PROTEIN POWDER presents...






TNA SICKNESS

*Dazz and D-Unit grab the stage to sing the theme of TNA Sickness (ON FIRE by Lloyd Banks) as the pyros go off*

Signs seen in the crowd

ilt_ravishing_one
El PureHatred does porn!
*Feeling Froggy for El Santo G*
I came to see D-Money
Splaya owns Savior
GET WELL Kurt AssMan!!!!


Scorpion "The Velocity Jobber" vs The Office Plant



It's the PPV return of The Office Plant. The plant cuts an electrifying promo dissing Scorpion. He calls Scorpion a piece of shit to a huge thundering pop. He calls Scorpion the most electrifying jobber in sports-entertaiment today. Scorpion has had enough and goes after the plant, but plant ducks a clothesline and puts Scorpion right into the "Chloroform Chockelhold" Scorpion taps 2 seconds later. The Plant works the crowd to a huge pop to kick off Sickness

*Distubed316 rolls into the arena fashionably late and runs into Joey Radd (Trips) Savior (Orton) and Joey's problem solver (Batista)*



D316: Boys, tonight will be a night like no other. I'm coming out on top baby! Now move!

_________________


MVP's HIGHLIGHT REEL

MVP talks more about himself and he brings out his first ever guest on the MVP Highlight Reel: The Naitch! Naitch looks half asleep but still musters enough energy to come out



MVP asks Naitch about this whole Invasion thing. Naitch says he is worried. A little. MVP then asks about being in the main event tonight, with Disturbed's TPWWE Title on the line. Naitch says he WILL win the title tonight but if he doesn't then Loose Cannon, TNA 4 Life, will win his #1 Contender's match and go on to face the TPWWE Champion. Hell it could even be LC vs The Naitch for TPWWE Gold. *crowd pops* All of a sudden, Dazz Dupree heads to the ring and insists that "Cafe De Dazz Dupree" is THE better show so he knocks MVP out and does the "Dazz Tickler" on MVP



__________________

ROCK SCISSORS PAPER...

The Naitch and Mr. Marcus is seen backstage very hostile with eachother, but they agree on playing Rock, scissors, paper to decide which match will be THE main event for tonight. Will it be the TNA or the TPWWE Championship match? Even though The NAitch is in the TPWWE main event, he wants HIS superstars, Joey and El PureHatred to represent the TNA in the main event. One round, rock scissors, papaer. No best of 7. No bullshit.

*The Naitch and Mr. Marcus look like two 5 year old kids......Mr. Marcus wins with a clean victory with scissors while Naitch picked paper. The TPWWE Championship match will be the main event*

____________________

Rabidwolverine vs. Splaya: #1 Contender for the vBulletin Championship "Ambulance Match"

Splaya and RW, two equal jobbers in their own right, get it on. 20 minutes later, splaya puts RW in the ambulance and gets his title shot for the vBulletin Title, until....



Savior comes from behind and throws splaya against the ambulance repeatedly. Savior says that he will never get his vBulletin title from him. As he was saying this, the camera manages to catch a fart sound coming from
splaya's ass. It must've been from the beatdown.

__________________

Dazz w/ ilt_undertaker vs. Superslim

Dazz and Superslim get it on. Dazz gets angry at ilt for some reason and sends her backstage. Slim manages to put Dazz in the Slimminator but Dazz reaches the ropes. ilt eventually comes back and nails Superslim with a
steel chair. Dazz picks up the pin. As Dazz celebrates, ilt nails Dazz with the steel chair ending their one-week partnership. As ilt leaves, MVP comes running in for the scraps and decides to put Dazz in the Lion Tamer for
ruining the Highlight Reel earlier on that night





_________________

TNA Tag Team Championship: TRO and Danny Electric vs Shaggy and Azarael

These 4 studs get it on. Azarael botches a couple of spots here and there leading to Shaggy to tag in and clean house. Danny lays smack on him. TRO is seen working the crowd, showing off his incredible 8 pack. Ripped to the bone. Azarael gets tagged in, tries to go for a lionsault but the rope snaps on him like what happened to Jericho at No Mercy 2002. Azarael tries to regroup but this ends up in TRO getting the school boy. 1-2-3
TRO and Danny are the new TNA Tag Team Champions.

*TRO and Danny celebrate with champagne and they run into El PureHatred. TRO tries to strike a deal with El PH to hand over the slut so they can "celebrate"



*El PureHatred obliges and tells the slut to bring back his money when she's done. As El PureHatred leaves, you can catches a glimpse of his new shirt that reads "El PurePimp"*

TRO and Danny:


__________________

El Nino vs. El Santo Guerrero (El Nino's mask is on the line)

These two luchas' put on a possible match of the year. El Nino is seen getting caught in the ropes.



El Santo G, feels froggy but misses on the conection. El Nino feels Froggy as well, and capitializes as El Santo was tying his shoes



That's gotta hurt. El Santo kicks out and goes bata locos on El Nino. Eventually El Santo proves too strong for El Nino and goes Froggy onbe more time. El Santo picks up the pin as El Nino is forced to unmask himself.



El PureHatred comes to comfort his buddy, but then realizes that he forgot his mask. "Oh shit" he yells out, as he runs to the back.
__________________


Savior vs Invisible: vBulletin Championship CAGE MATCH (Savior wrote this match and sent it to me)

JR: It's the first Blue Steel Cage match in TNA history folks....Solid steel made to punish bodies and break them
*Invisible enters first and inspects the cage*
*Savior enters....With Joey radd. Invisible looks pissed off*
While arguing with Joey who is outside the cage, Savior dashes in and attacks from behind. A good 7 minute match is going on. Invisible Throws Savior off the top rope and starts to climb the cage. Joe climbs up (from the outside) and punches Invisible in the nuts. The outside Ref demands Joe goes to the back, before he does he tosses a microphone in the ring. Savior gets up dazed and grabs the mic. Invisible grabs savior by the hair but is met with a microphone handle to the face. Savior starts to climb to the top. Invisible grabs his leg just as he is about to go over and pulls him down and back drops him. Invisible is shown to be bleeding. Invisible gets up first and whips Savior in to the ropes, Savior runs back as fast as he can and dives at Invisible. Invisible jumps out of the way, Savior busts through the door on to the ground knocked out. Bell sounds Savior Retains

_______________

Another ad for Dorian Yates WHEY PROTEIN is shown. Dark_Kane is the poster child for this ad



Dark_Kane: Dooooooriaaaaan....I can SEEEEEE yoooooou....



Dorian Yates (Former Mr. Olympia): Yes Dark_Kane, I can see you too. What do you have on your mind, big guy?

Dark_Kane: Protein means big muscles!

Dorian Yates: Yes it does. 25 grams of protein per scoop. no carbs, no sodium, just pure Whey Protein!

Dark_Kane: Are you sure this won't give diareah like it did to this guy?

*Azarael's picture is shown on the Tron*



Dorian Yates: No Dark_Kane. My protein powder is lactose-free and I guarantee you will no experience the runs

*Loose Cannon makes a cameo*



LC: Ok Father, shut the hell up already and go buy Dorian Yates' Whey Protein Powder. Available at GNC's everywhere!

Dark_Kane:


Loose Cannon vs Nowhere Man #1 Contender for the TPWWE Championship

LC and Nowhere Man wrestle an instant classic. Two faces verses one another. LC has the upper hand, but Nowhere Man goes psycho and turns the momentum. LC is covering up as Nowhere Man works the crowd. Surprisingly, The Church has not been at ringside to help. LC and Nowhere Man eventually fight through the crowd. Out of nowhere, some "guy"
hits the LCKO on Nowhere Man. LC takes advantage of this and drags NM in the ring, waits from behind, and nails his own LCKO on NM. 1-2-3. LC picks up the pinfall and he'll be facing the TPWWE Champion at the next PPV.


PART 2 coming up. Hold on....

[The Naitch]

Outsider vs The Cock II

The Cock and Outsider have another shot at eachother. Part 2_style. The Cock has the upper hand and Outsider is geting his ass handed to him. The Cock cleans house for most of the match but Outsider just keeps on staying
up. The Cock has had enough and starts unloading like a mofo and hits Outsider with a Cock Bottom. Outsider kicks out! The Cock nails another Cock Bottom on Outsider. BAHGAWDAIHOUIJIHIHIHIHOU Outsider kicks out!. The Cock goes for another Cock Bottom, but Outsider counters and hits a Cock Bottom on The Cock! The Cock kicks out at 1. Outsider tries to go for the Atomic Leg Drop. But The Cock kicks out. Outsider tries to imitate the Hollywood Elbow, but Cock moves out of the way, does a nip up, ducks Outsider's clothesline and nails Outsider with the Cockbuster, followed by a Hollywood Elbow. Just for good measure, The Cock picks Outsider up and nails him with a third Cock Bottom. 1-2-3. The Cock wins his first ever match in TNA.

TNA Ladder Match: Joey Radd vs El PureHatred

These two studs get it on. Joey tries to hit the Rad-ifer early on, but PH reverses it and throws Joey over the top rope. PH follows up with a corkscrew attack onto Joey below. *huge pop* PH throws Joey into the steel steps then he goes for the ladder. PH tries to nail Joey with the ladder, but Joey sends the ladder right into PH's face with a front dropkick. Joey starts getting full of himself and starts flirting with one of the beautiful broads at ringside. The crowd loves it for some reason and they all chant "RAD RAD RAD RADICAL!!!!!" Joey then starts another attack on PH. Both men are getting face reactions, just like in the LC/Nowhere Man match. Joey grabs the ladder and plants PH's leg in between. Then he grabs the steel chair from under Jilian Garcia's ass, and starts giving the ladder chairshots while PH screams in pain. Joey gets on the outer mat, he taunts for the crowd, he hops off and plants both feet onto the ladder, while PH screams in more pain. Joey leaves PH to waste and sets up the ladder near the announce table. He then sets up PH on the spanish announce table. Oh oh, will the spanish announce table go 0-5 at PPV's? WAIT! PH gets up and tips the ladder sending Joey crashing through the OTHER announce table! PH just saved his people by saving the spanish announce table from another collapse. The Spanish announce team of Tom & Jerry Garcia get all giddy and thanks THEIR NEW MEXICAN HERO, El PureHatred for saving the day! ORELAY!!!! PH then grabs the ladder and
heads into the ring. Joey isn't far behind though and nails El PH with a backdrop. ok fast forward after a few Hatred-caranas and the most radifying move in sports entertainment today....EL PH hits a sunset flip into a powerbomb on Joey Radd. The Holy shit chants erupt as Joey looks in serious pain. El PH is at the VERY top of the ladder but for some odd reason, he doesn't go for the title. He decides to work the crowd, and after a few seconds, ilt_undertaker comes running out to the ring! She tips over the ladder sending PH balls first onto the top rope! Ouch...ilt picks up
her man, Joey, and tells him to get the fuck up. She helps get the ladder set up, as Joey starts climbing. Joey snags the TNA title thanks to ilt as PH just barely manages to push the ladder, but it's too late. 5 star match and a
standing ovation for the match, not the ilt run-in

____________________


TPWWE Championship: Disturbed316 vs The Naitch (No hold Barred)

Down with the sickness hits as Disturbed comes out with his TPWWE Championship to a ton of boos. D316 flips off the crowd a couple of times.

WOOOOOO! Back in black hits and out comes The Naitch to a huge pop from the TNA fans. Naitch hasn't got this reaction since he's been a heel most of the time, but the fans start going crazy with the WOOOs' Naitch grabs one of the fans' signs that says "Naitch for Prez" which shows this picture on the back



The Naitch gets back to the basics and showboats for the fans as he unrobes The two stare eachother down until the bell rings, and here we go. They exchange blows until Naitch nails D with a poke to the eyes. Naitch chops away, whips D into the ropes and nails a high back toss on D. Naitch struts around for the crowd and WOOOOOs some more.
Naitch tries to go for the Figure 4 but D kicks him off and starts stomping on Naitch. D chokes Naitch for a while. Fast forward a bit here, and D whips Naitch into the ropes but Naitch executes a crucifix pin. D kicks out and nails
Naitch with a huge clothesline. D goes sets Naitch up for the Sickness, but Naitch counters, pinches D down and locks in the Figure 4. D hits the ropes in time, while Naitch goes for the steel chair. D ducks and Naith nails the ref instead! Out comes TEAM SEXY! The Ravishing One, Invisible and Danny Electric, the NEW TNA Tag Team Champs. They come out and tell Naitch that they got his back. To settel the score, Mr. Marcus and Outsider come out and they bothe get in Team Sexy's faces. Both sides just exchange words as D316 is seen getting his ass handed to him by The Naitch. Naitch has some
serious momentum going in, whips D into the ropes, but D manages to set Naitch up for the Sickness....Naitch reverses it and nails the Sickness on Disturbed! Naitch then stumbles for a bit and manages to lock in the Figure 4!!!!! *loudest pop of the night* Naitch has got D in the center of the ring as D is screaming in pain!

All of a sudden, TRO nails the ref in the face with his tag title!!!! Disturbed is seen TAPPING to the Figure 4 but the ref is out!!!! All of a sudden, Danny kicks Naitch in the head! *boos* Mr.Marcus and Outsider get in the ring and everyone starts beating on The Naitch. TRO grabs a chair a drills Naitch to the ground. As Naitch starts to get up, D316 nails Naitch with his TPWWE Championship belt. Then Outsider powerslams Naitch, allowing Mr. Marcus a chance to lock Naitch in the Figure 4. Invisible, Team Sexy's tazer man starts tazering The Naitch.

*On the Tron, a forklift is seen in front of the TNA lockeroom door, locking all TNA Superstars in*

Disturbed316, TRO, Mr. Marcus, Outsider, Danny, and Invisble are all seen celebrating in the ring as TRO grabs a British flag and starts waving it in the air. D316 grabs another British flag and puts it over Naitch's lifeless corpse as the show goes off the air. D316 retains in a NO CONTEST

END SHOW

Summary

-Scorpion JOBS to the plant
-ilt_undertaker turns on Dazz
-Dazz defeats Superslim
-MVP interviews naitch on his Highlight Reel. Dazz attacks MVP because he thinks Cafe De Dazz Dupree is a better show
-Splaya defeats RW and gets a shot at Savior's vBulletin Title. Savior ends up shit kicking splaya anyways
-Dazz defeats Superslim, and MVP gets his revenge on Dazz with the Lion Tamer
-TRO and Danny win the TNA Tag Titles
-El Santo defeats El Nino forcing him to unmask
-Savior defeats Invisible
-LC becomes the #1 Contender for the TPWWE Championship
-The Cock defeasts Outsider
-Joey Radd defeats El PureHatred thanks to ilt_undertaker
-NO CONTEST: Disturbed, Mr Marcus, Outsider, TRO, Danny and Invisible start a "British Invasion" on TNA

[Dazz]

Hot shit.

[Disturbed316]

lol

Nice show

BEWARE THE BRITS

[Azriel]

These get better and better Naitch, good show.

Excellent PPV. I love the whole "British Invasion" thing as I didn't even realize most of them were British. Finally Ilt goes back with Joey Radd. Nice. MVP and DAZZ is a great feud too. I wonder where I go from here though. My chracter is at a crossroads right now. Gonna have to do some thinking and deliever some good promos.

[Azriel]

LC, you're fighting Disturbed for the TPWWE Championship baby. Bring it on home to The Church.

[The Naitch]

LC, it's you and Disturbed for the TPWWE Title now

I'll think of a PPV name

[Disturbed316]

Nah

British InVasion 4 life

[Azriel]

The day after the PPV Azrael is seen backstage being interviewed by Mitchell Hole. Azrael looks fairly pleased even though he and Shaggy lost

Mitch: Thank you Azrael for giving me this great opportunity to interview you.

Azrael: You are welcome. Anyone is better than that retard The Roach. Now go and lay your questions on me.

Mitch: Well, first off may I ask why you are so calm today and not pissed off over the tag title lost.

Azrael: Well, I am upset that we lost to Team Sexy and that they defected to that other faction TPWWE, but the fact remains that LC's victory over Nowhere Man overshadows our loss, because now LC gets a chance to become the TPWWE champion at the next PPV.

Mitch: Speaking about Nowhere Man, he still has The Father captive.

Azrael: Exactly why I requested this interview. I want to challenge Nowhere Man at the next PPV in a Hell in a Cell, and if I win, he will be forced to bring The Father back to the Church, but if he wins, I will go on a self-imposed suspension for the span of one PPV, and if you accept my challenge Nowhere Man, I promise no interference from any member of the Church.

[Scorpion]

Scorpion comes out the next day furious at his loss and goes into the Naitches locker room

Scorpion: I did not tap to that Damn plant, i was just... reaching for the ropes ... I want a chance to prove that i am not a jobber, a match against any of your wrestlers in the TNA. Any time, any where, any match. I will prove myself to everyone out there that i am someone to be respected... no, to be feared

[The Naitch]

Scorpion vs RW at the next PPV

"The Jobber Challenge"

[Azriel]

(Naitch, isn't Summer Jam the next PPV?)

[The Naitch]

oh yeah

[Scorpion]

**Scorpion is walking backstage looking for Mr. Marcus when he comes across Outsider laid out on the floor bleeding profusely. He runs and gets help quickly and soon he comes back with EMTs. The EMTs put Outsider on a stretcher and load him in an ambulance then drive off. Scorpion looks around and sees a bloodied note on the floor. After reading the note he ran back into Mr. Marcus's room**

Scorpion: Mr. marcus, we have a problem

*Mr. marcus starts to read the letter.*

Outsider was merely the first in my war against the TPWWE. Soon any and all members will suffer my wrath, the TPWWE will crumble by my hands alone and TNA shall rain supreme. You will all hear me and fear me, the fate of the TPWWE is in my hands, enjoy the TPWWE while you can.

Signed,
A hired Assassin a.k.a. Demise of the TPWWE

[Savior]

Invisible it was already decided before the match that you would lose (not by me) so don't think I was being an asshole.

[The Naitch]

Originally Posted by Disturbed316 Nah British InVasion 4 life

Beware of the Loose Cannon. He's very "Loose"

[Disturbed316]

Loose like a goose

[Savior]

I suggest that for the PPV after next it should be titled Impact

[The Naitch]

Originally Posted by Savior Invisible it was already decided before the match that you would lose (not by me) so don't think I was being an asshole.

TNA Summer Jam

Savior vs Splaya

vBulletin Championship

I QUIT MATCH

[Azriel]

Originally Posted by Savior I suggest that for the PPV after next it should be titled Impact

How original
j/k Cool idea

[The Naitch]

Originally Posted by Savior I suggest that for the PPV after next it should be titled Impact

nah

[MVP]

The ring is set up for an encore edition of The Highlight Reel. MVP is standing in the ring as his theme music blares. The volume of boos is equivilent to that of a Nazi reunion. MVP gets on the mic and speaks to the fans.

MVP: "Well I must say your reception is not very warm considering I stole the show."

Fans boo in disagreement

MVP: "You people need to understand that without me on this show there would be no show, because the rest of the esteemed roster is garbage. I am embarrassed to be a part of TNA or TPWWF whatever the hell you call it, but it's my responsibility to you, the fans, to deliver, and it's obvious that I am the only one who can do it. Now enough of my much needed boasting, I want to introduce my guest tonight; at TNA Sickness I kicked his ass single-handedly which proved to be no challenge what so ever. So please give a round of a applause, because he needs it after I embarassed the hell out of him, to DAZZ.


A man resembling this guy makes his way to the ring. It's obvious to the fans and viewers that he is an impostor.



MVP: "So Dazz, how does it feel to be completely humiliated in front of these fans here because you were stupid enough to challenge me?"

Imposter: "Yo homie G home slice it ain't dat badddddddd. I was all pissed and like cause you been trippin' an shit, but I gotta say dawg I had ma foot up ma ass oh sompin' cuz der's no way ah could bring it on against a tough motta fucka like you dawg."

MVP: "Now for those of whom that cannot understand Dazz's speech impedement, he said that he was wrong for trying to stand up to me. So Dazz does that mean you'll never step in the ring with me?"

Impostor: "HELLLLLLLLLLL NO!"

MVP: "I must say Dazz you're not as stupid as I thought you were. What do you think of my show?"

Impostor: "Man dis show is hott. I dunno if my "Cafe 4 Gay Fagz" iz betta dan dis show. Ah mean ur da best talk show g der iz an ah can't believe ah could compete against u. Man ur like Conan O'Brien oh sompin, now how am ah gonna act?"

MVP: "Perhaps you shold go back to screwing your poodle up the ass. At least you see my point, The Highlight Reel is the superior talk show, and the second best part of TNA besides seeing me wrestle. Now Dazz get out of my ring, you're fagging my show all up you wigger posing ass-clown."

Dazz comes running into the ring. Imposter Dazz tries blocking Dazz, but he pushes him out of the way and onto the couch, causing it to flip over. Dazz starts vigorously punching MVP on top of his desk. Dazz grabs MVP's TV screen and attempts to hit MVP over the head with it. MVP low blows Dazz and grabs the TV screen out of Dazz's hand. MVP smashes Dazz over the head with the TV screen and puts Dazz in the Lion Tamer. After about 15 seconds MVP leaves a bloodied Dazz in the ring with his ruined set.

Fans continue to boo MVP as he walks out.

-----------------------------------------

18% of fans believed that the impostor Dazz was the real person.

[Shaggy]

***The camera pans up on the TNA Tron and shows that The Roach is standing with Shaggy with an interview***

Roach: "So Shaggy. It looks like you still are with out your beloved tag titles. What do you have to say about that?"

Shaggy: "Well maybe its just not my time to hold a tag title right now. I have nothing bad to say. TRO and DE defeated us in the ring fair and square and won. There is nothing wrong with it that maybe I just need to move on."

Coach: "Well that was very nice of you to say that. You said on one of the past interviews that you would be there for Naitch in the main event. Well it comes out that TPWWE was able to stop yall by locking yall in the locker room. What do you have to say about that?"

Shaggy: "Well Naitch, Im sorry. I told you that I would be there and I failed in helping you out. But right now I am putting out a challenge to anyone in the TPWWE. I am challenging any of those cowards to a match at TNA Sickness. They want to attempt to take over the TNA they are gonna have to through me and the rest of us. But soon all of TPWWE will learn that they will all be sacrificed and there is nothing that them or that Mr.Marcus can do to stop it."

***Shaggy walks off as the camera pans to the ring for upcoming action***

[The Ravishing One]

Originally Posted by Disturbed316 British InVasion 4 life

[The Ravishing One]

Great post Naitch.

[The Naitch]

simply ravishing

*gets nekkid*

[The Naitch]

Boys, nakedness aside, I was thinking of having an Elimination Chamber match for the TNA title.

Joey, and 5 other guys

Nowhere Man
El Santo (Mr Latin America)
Shaggy
Outsider
??????

And a new tag team is born: El PureHatred and El Nino

And Mr Marcus vs The Naitch at Summer Jam

[Disturbed316]

BAW GOWD WHAT A SLOBERKNOCKER SUMMER JAM WILL BE!

[Joe Kerr]

show starts off with ballons and streamers falling from the ceiling..



The radical music hits as Joey Radd makes his way to the ring with his "escorts"




Joey-- once again I Radified all my peeps. Like normal I left with the gold and the girl...well I guess like normal Pure hatred left broke with blue balls

[Danny Electric]

Great show, the turn at the end was really well done.
Each show just gets better.
I've got an idea, I know it's like the 5 0n 5 match but Team Sexy versus Savior and two other TNA members. The vbulletin and Tag Team Belts on the line.
What do you think?

[Nowhere Man]

Awww, I get jobbed out in my debut match?

Well, technically I've still got the Father hostage, so we're gonna have to have ourselves a little follow-up to that, aren't we?

[Mr. Marcus]

**"The Cho-Cho-Chosen One......" hit's the TNA PA systems as Mr. Marcus' tron starts playing, but it's apporximatley 30 seconds until we see Mr. Marcus struting out of the back, and wallcing down the entrance ramp. Mr. Marcus has one of his trusty 6 string guitars with him, as he enters the ring and smugly looks at the crowd.**


Mr. Marcus : *is being boo'd from the crowd as he places the microphone down to hsi chest and starts laughing, he then hoists the mike back up, breathes heavily into it and continues*........I told you so. I told each and every mindless fan out here..... I told every slugish, lacklusting, worthless peice of TNA trash back there... and I told you Naitch *pointing to the camera* That TPWWE has resurfaced and not a soul alive would be ready to face the consequences.

**A very loud "Die TPWWE" chant breaks out, as Mr. Marcus glares on at the screaming TNA fans as he let's them tire themselves out..

Mr. Marcus : TPWWE sure as hell ain't dead.... I swear I saw it kick TNA's ass all over their own arena last night!

Crowd: ........

**A chant that haunted Mr. Marcus in TPWWE breaks out, as the whole live audience breaks out into a stretched chant of "Asshole....Asshole..."**

Mr. Marcus : I've come out here, as the Authoritized leader of TPWWE to first and formost thank a trio of Individuals.... individuals who last night chose to stand out above the rest of the TNA troglodites, and made an impact that was heard 'round the world, yes, I'm talking about none other than the cohiesive unit, made up of The Ravishing One..... Invisible.... and Danny Electric!! Team Sexy has seen the light and realized that their furture is so much more brighter and prosporous within the ranks of TPWWE! In case you morons missed the proceedings of last evening, I present to you some TPWWE historical fotage!

**The clip of the TPWWE roster dismembering Naitch is shown, concluding with the rebel group's arms high in the air, and Naitch left beaten and broken in the middle of the ring.**

Mr. Marcus : The only question that can be asked upon viewing that fotage is.... Where is TNA's unity? And the answer is almost rethorical, because quite frankly there is none. Natich, you must come to terms that we could've ended your useless career last night, and not a single damn TNA member came out to your aid. I like to call that fear, fear of TPWWE and a little bit of apathey thrown in there for flavor.

**The crowd somewhat reluctantly has no choice but to agree, having seen the brutal evidence. They still chose not to embrace the TPWWE Commissioner as they show their distaste for him**

Mr. Marcus : And as a last resort, you go ahead and blindy book myself against the likes of you at Summer Jam? That, my broken nemises, is laughable, and furthermore, unrealistic. In other words, No way in hell will I compete in a TNA sanctioned contest.


**The crowd immeditaly bursts out into a "YOU FEAR NAITCH" chant, as Mr. Marcus seems to have a defensive look on his face.**


Mr. Marcus : Woah...Woah..... I never said that I wouldn't kick Naitch's ass... I'm just saying that when it does happen, it will happen under my terms, and my jurisdiction! So Naitch, the deal is as follows... and I'll give you 48 hours to think lonnnnnnnnnggggg, and hard about this decision, because it could very well be the last one of your career. At Summer Jam, The Naitch, vs Mr. Marcus, in a TPWWE sanctioned contest... held within a 14 foot high... steel cage!


**The crowd seems shocked at Mr. Marcus' request, as he stares into the camera and drops the microphone to the ground, Mr. Marcus continues looking into the camera for what seems an enterinty, as he slides out of the ring and carries his guitar with him. On his way up the ramp the TNA camera man is zooming in on Mr. Marcus, and get's a close up of Mr. Marcus cocking back and smashing the guitar of the camera man's head. Mr. Marcus grins at the fallen TNA staff employee, as he raises his arms to the air and gloats to the crowd, as we cut to commercial.**

[El Santo]

Reveling in his win over El Nino and his possible entry into the Elimination Chamber, El Santo Guerrero dons the mask for the first time. It's a bit small, and it smells like cabbage, but HOT DAMN the ladies love it.



Meanwhile, humbled and without a mask, El Nino hits rock bottom and is forced to take a job on a children's show.



Thank God for South America!

[PureHatred]

**Backstage, ilt_undertaker is standing in her locker room, wrapped in a towel, having just left the shower, when she notices a gift box on the dressing room counter. There's a note inside:



"Yo, boo
I wanna give you mad props,
So I went out on the town
And hit up the shops...

I stole..er, bought you sumpin hot
But before you can see...
Gotta follow this map.
CAN'T SEE ME!

ilt: oh joey..you have such a way with words.



ilt follows the map to a trailer parked in the parking lot. She opens the door, and sees a jewelry box sitting on a table in the midle of the room. She smiles, and steps forward. In the time it takes for her to realize she's not alone, a bag covers her hea, and the room goes black.

***********************************

Back in the arena, El Purehatred is giving an exclusive interview to Spanish announce sensation Jerry Garcia:



PH: At Sickness, I lost my title shot because of that girl ilt_undertaker. And just yesterday,. I found out what "ilt." It stands for I Love The Undertaker. You know what I love, Jerry? I love....PINATAS!!! El Nino, why don't you bring out...



...THE PINATA!!!

JR: BAHGAWD THEYDRESSEDILTUPASAPINATATHOSESONSOFBITCHES BAHWGAWD!!!!



El Nino spends the next few minutes trying to knock the candy out of ilt_undertaker.

PH: Haha...now I am too muy macho to have to slap putas around every time the cause me problems, so next time tis gringa gets out of line, my new firend willd eal with her. Come on out... El Diabolica!!!



Legendary lucha bitch El Diabolica comes out to the inrg and snatches ilt up...



...before locking her up in the Femme Fatale. Ilt begs for mercy, but there is none to be had here. Already weakened b being wacked repeatedly by an angry midget, ilt is no match for this vicious lucha she-lion.

Finally, the hold is released, and ilt is immediately taken away by medics.



JR:BAWGAWD...THAT MOVE TOOK YEARS OFF HER LIFE!



PH: Fun time is over, Joey Pendejo. You and your girl may have gotten away with my belt once, but she can't save your ass next time. There's a Mexican saying that goes something like this: No despierte a diablo durmiente. 'Don't wake the devil that sleeps.' This was about the belt.

Just the belt.

And had you beat me like a man, that's how it would've stayed. But you are a coward, and you hide behind your ilTijuana Hooker and now I am coming for you. I will take your belt and with that you will lose the fame, the money, and the adoration of these fans. I will take away everything that makes you 'Rad-ical.' And the only thing that will be left is this: the knowledge, deep in your heart, that I am the better man. You escaped once. Next time, you will see that what drives me isn't fame or greed or lust...it is 100% Pure....HATRED!!!

[Bazooka]

*Invisible is shown sitting in a dark room *wearing a TBAY Lightning jersey* with only a pink light shining on him*

Invisible:"Savior, you went through all these precautions to ensure that I wouldn't cheat or get any help from my Sexy buddies. Hypocrite, I played by your rules and you couldn't obey. You could not beat me fairly, your win against me was unjustified!"

*Invisible shakes his head *

Invisible:"However, I will not be having my rematch... Splaya has his shot at claiming the TPWW vbulletin title, ending Saviors streak."

*Lights go back on to reveal Splaya beat up and tied against the wall*

Invisible:"Sincerely the best of luck on winning what should have been mine!"

*Lights go pink again as a sadistic smiles fills the face of Invisible*

[Splaya]

*The glass breaks and the crowd is seen looking up at the TPWWTron wondering who is on his way out. All of a sudden a bruised battered and bloody Splaya walks down to the ring. He hobbles into the ring and is getting ready to be interviewed by the Roach.*

Roach: Well Well well, if it isn't the los....

*Roach is met with a stunner and Splaya kicks his ass out of the ring*

Splaya: Now look I'm sick of the bullshit and I'm sick of the attacks. It's always Savior running and hitting me from behind and all that crap. Roll the damn footage.

*The TPWWTron shows footage of Sickness where Splaya was walking behind in the back after his victory when he was assaulted from behind*

Splaya: The footage is clear. He jumps you from behind. So it's plain and simple. At summer jam you are done Savior. Done Like Dinner.

*Savior's music hits and it's Joey Radd that comes to the top of the ramp*

Joey: Bitch I swear Savior will kick your punk ass all over Summer Jam, jigga

*splaya begins to say something when he is hit from behind by Savior. Savior hits "The Bricks" and leaves Splaya in the ring shaking and convulsing as he already has an injured body*

[Shaggy]

(everyone else is starting to use pics in there promos so I think I will try to this time. Sure its only one but its my first time.)
------------------------------------------------------------------------

***The Church of Orton Music begins to play as Shaggy makes his way to the ring***



Shaggy: "Well as I was sitting in the back I over heard Naitch talking about including me in this Elmination Chamber he was thinking up. All I have to say is count me in. With me leaving the tag title situation behind for now I find no other good thing to do then go into the Big Title run. Sure I would love to kick some TPWWE ass but I think that will happen along the way anyway. Hopefully Naitch will think about this match and sign it. Because when its signed and set I believe that I will be the one walking out of the match the new TNA Heavyweight Champion."

[Shaggy]

(damn the pic didnt show up)

[Splaya]

So who is in TNA and who is in TPWWE?