Xero
04-26-2010, 12:55 AM
From Austin's Twitter:
so anyway there i was with 900 lbs on the bar...the first rep came up so easy i went for another one...big mistake...3 sharks crashed...
through the front door of the gym...i still had 900 lbs in my hands so i could only fight them off by kicking at them...big mistake...
the biggest of the sharks...a 14 footer bit my left leg off at the knee...that really pissed me off!! i did 3 more reps and threw the bar...
at the shark that bit my leg off...the weight pinned him down and i was able to retrieve my leg from his mouth...too busy to sew it...
back on i threw it in my beer cooler so it wouldnt spoil...i now have to battle the other 2 sharks on only one leg...not an easy task...
austin vs. 2 sharks is a dream match for wrestlemania and instead its happening in a gym...clearly this an anything goes fight to the death.
being a method actor i revert back to jack conrad, john brickner, and of course stone cold....these sumbitches dont stand a chance...
the gym explodes in a violent display of brutality, violence, calamity, and blood...lots and lots of blood---shark blood dammit....
im using dumbbells, barbells, cables, everything but the kitchen sink, and i would use the kitchen sink but there is not a kitchen...
i have exhausted all of my weapons...except my double custom one of a kind nickel plated glock .45... that is filled with movie blanks!!!!
i cant kill anything shooting blanks!!! (not those kind of blanks)...so with no other option i drag myself to the cooler...
people let me tell you ive lost a lot of blood...the sharks seem to be gaining strength...in a last hope of pure instinct and survival...
i open my cooler..reach in and pull out a cold steveweiser...and my leg..i pop the top and pour the cold nutritious beverage down the hatch.
it tastes so good i grab one more...guzzle it down...my body feels the rush of energy...its like popeye eating a can of spinach...hell yeah-
i jump up on my one good leg and start swinging my other leg around...clubbing everything in sight...the size 13 nike shock is causing...
maximum damage...and finally ...its all over...the sharks are dead...hold it...WHAM!!!! one of them was playing possom..not any more...
i reach into the cooler and grab a cold one...i grab my leg and head out to my Ford Bronco...the one and only George Strait is playing...
one of my favorite songs.....there is smile of victory on my face...time to break out a needle and thread...ive got a leg to sew back on...
well i got some good news and bad news...the good news is i got my leg sewed back on..the bad news is i sewed the damn thing on backward...
more bad news...with this leg sewed on backwards i tried to get a beer out of the cooler but i cant reach it cause i keep WALKING IN CIRCLES
so anyway there i was with 900 lbs on the bar...the first rep came up so easy i went for another one...big mistake...3 sharks crashed...
through the front door of the gym...i still had 900 lbs in my hands so i could only fight them off by kicking at them...big mistake...
the biggest of the sharks...a 14 footer bit my left leg off at the knee...that really pissed me off!! i did 3 more reps and threw the bar...
at the shark that bit my leg off...the weight pinned him down and i was able to retrieve my leg from his mouth...too busy to sew it...
back on i threw it in my beer cooler so it wouldnt spoil...i now have to battle the other 2 sharks on only one leg...not an easy task...
austin vs. 2 sharks is a dream match for wrestlemania and instead its happening in a gym...clearly this an anything goes fight to the death.
being a method actor i revert back to jack conrad, john brickner, and of course stone cold....these sumbitches dont stand a chance...
the gym explodes in a violent display of brutality, violence, calamity, and blood...lots and lots of blood---shark blood dammit....
im using dumbbells, barbells, cables, everything but the kitchen sink, and i would use the kitchen sink but there is not a kitchen...
i have exhausted all of my weapons...except my double custom one of a kind nickel plated glock .45... that is filled with movie blanks!!!!
i cant kill anything shooting blanks!!! (not those kind of blanks)...so with no other option i drag myself to the cooler...
people let me tell you ive lost a lot of blood...the sharks seem to be gaining strength...in a last hope of pure instinct and survival...
i open my cooler..reach in and pull out a cold steveweiser...and my leg..i pop the top and pour the cold nutritious beverage down the hatch.
it tastes so good i grab one more...guzzle it down...my body feels the rush of energy...its like popeye eating a can of spinach...hell yeah-
i jump up on my one good leg and start swinging my other leg around...clubbing everything in sight...the size 13 nike shock is causing...
maximum damage...and finally ...its all over...the sharks are dead...hold it...WHAM!!!! one of them was playing possom..not any more...
i reach into the cooler and grab a cold one...i grab my leg and head out to my Ford Bronco...the one and only George Strait is playing...
one of my favorite songs.....there is smile of victory on my face...time to break out a needle and thread...ive got a leg to sew back on...
well i got some good news and bad news...the good news is i got my leg sewed back on..the bad news is i sewed the damn thing on backward...
more bad news...with this leg sewed on backwards i tried to get a beer out of the cooler but i cant reach it cause i keep WALKING IN CIRCLES