ARMCHAIR WARFARE: Season 2 - TV WEEK TWO **RESULTS POSTED**

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WEEK 1 SCORES

SHOW RANKINGS

The numbers in brackets represent where the show was ranked for each of the 10 Judges. Remember, a 1st place finish gets you 5 Points, 2nd place = 4 and so on.

NAPW: (5-2-2-1-1-4-4-2-2-3) for a points total of 34
IWC: (1-4-4-2-3-4-4-5-4-1) for a points total of 32
UCE: (3-5-5-3-2-1-4-1-3-2) for a points total of 30
BAW: (4-1-3-5-5-5-1-3-1-4) for a points total of 28
HKW: (2-3-1-4-4-3-3-4-5-5) for a points total of 26


STAR POWER RANKINGS

Every guy that received a vote is listed here. Once again, a 1st place finish = 5 Points for that guy, the scores are totalled and the Top 5 earn their show Bonus Points based on the 1st = 5 Points, 5th = 1 Point system.

1) John Cena (34 Points) (UCE) = 5 POINTS
2) Dustin Rhodes (22 Points) (IWC) = 4 POINTS
3) CM Punk (20 Points) (HKW) = 3 POINTS
4) Batista (14 Points) (HKW) = 2 POINTS
5) Alberto Del Rio (11 Points) (UCE) = 1 POINT
6) Yoshi Tatsu (10 Points)
7) AJ Styles (9 Points)
=8) Kurt Angle (5 Points)
=8) Samoa Joe (5 Points)
=8) The Miz (5 Points)
9) Randy Orton (4 Points)
10) John Morrison (3 Points)
=11) Daniel Bryan (2 Points)
=11) Raven (2 Points)
=11) Eddie Colon (2 Points)
12) Drew McIntyre (1 Point)


"FINAL" RANKINGS

1) IMPACT WRESTLING CORPORATION = 41 POINTS (Public Poll Winner [+5 Points])

2) UNIVERSAL CARNAGE ENTERPRISES = 36 POINTS

3) NEW AGE PRO WRESTLING = 34 POINTS

4) HARD KNOCKS WRESTLING = 31 POINTS

5) BAD ASS WRESTLING = 28 POINTS

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What will we see from Week 2? Can IWC capitalise on their strong start? Can BAW make up some ground? It's all very close and of course the field is wide open.

Will Cena still be on top of the Armchair Universe? Will "surprise package" Yoshi Tatsu crack the Top 5? Will "The Hottest Property" Bryan Daniel make a splash this week - he was in the Top 3 picks for all of the roster boards after all?

Well, let's see shall we...

** REMEMBER, PLEASE DO NOT VOTE/RANK/POST UNTIL ALL THE SHOWS HAVE BEEN POSTED & YOU HAVE READ ALL OF THE SHOWS**

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[The opening montage and pyro go off. We are then taken ringside.]

Emma Dilemma: Welcome to Monday Mindwarp! I’m Emma Dilemma, and with me is Tony Gooch. Say Tony, Did You Know that last week’s show placed first in the demographic market of-

Tony Gooch: Nobody cares! Let’s get things started! We’re getting right into it tonight!

Match #1: Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky vs. Michelle McCool

Emma Dilemma: Well, last week it was The Beautiful People versus LayCool… when Awesome Kong came out and well… take a look…

[A quick recap of last week is shown, with Awesome Kong destroying the BPs and LayCool, with Gail Kim just watching and nodding her approval. The rescue by Mickie James, A.J., and Beth Phoenix is also shown. Package ends with Gail on the ramp yelling it was just the beginning.]

Emma Dilemma: Luckily, they were saved before any serious damage could be done… they can’t be one hundred percent, but I don’t think they care… a possible chance for revenge here tonight… and maybe some answers.

[LayCool enters to the jeers of the fans. They move somewhat more gingerly than normal. The Beautiful People enter next, also somewhat gingerly. Gail Kim makes her entrance next, closely tailed by Awesome Kong. Kim and Kong make their way halfway down the ramp when…]

Travis Preston: Excuse me, if we may have your attention, please.

[The faces of Travis and Veronica Preston, brother and sister owners of UCE, have appeared on the tron.]

Veronica Preston: Last week, we had a number of matches that involved outside interlopers affecting the outcome… and that is bad for business.

Travis Preston: This week we WILL have winners. From bell to bell, the competitors WILL be left alone… anyone caught trying to get involved otherwise… anyone even caught ringside… will be suspended indefinitely!

[The faces fade from the tron. LayCool seems pretty upset. Angelina Love seems pretty happy with the scenario. Gail Kim looks as if she is contemplating the matter for a moment. She whispers something to Awesome Kong, and an evil grin spreads on Kong’s face. Kong nods and heads back up the ramp. Angelina Love follows shortly after. Layla heads back quite reluctantly.]

Emma Dilemma: What an announcement from the Prestons! A fair and just one! Now it really is just Gail Kim, Velvet Sky, and Michelle McCool in the ring! And I must say… as much as Velvet and Michelle may dislike each other… it looks like they’ve only got eyes for Gail Kim right now… Gail doesn’t seem too worried about it though…

[The bell rings and immediately Velvet and Michelle go for Kim. They double-team Kim for a bit, but things quickly degenerate as Michelle starts to get a little too bossy and instructive for Velvet’s liking. Velvet and Michelle begin to go at it, while Gail Kim quietly slips to the outside.]

Emma Dilemma: No… come on ladies! The woman who did nothing while you were brutally attacked, the woman who perhaps arranged that attack, is right there! But Velvet Sky and Michelle McCool just can’t seem to get along!

[Velvet and Michelle attack each other with the same level of aggressive hatred displayed last week. At an opportune moment, Gail grabs Velvet by the feet and drags her to the outside. Gail introduces Velvet to the ringpost. Gail back into the ring and she starts to go at it with Michelle. Michelle manages to get a few near falls before Gail firmly takes control. Velvet tries to get back into the ring, but Gail knocks her off the apron with a springboard dropkick, sending her into the guard barriers. Gail shifts back to Michelle and locks in the Argentine Leglock/Stretch Muffler. Michelle struggles, but quickly taps out. ]

Emma Dilemma: Gail Kim with the impressive victory… Velvet Sky and Michelle McCool just could not put aside their differences here tonight, and Kim took advantage of that…

Tony Gooch: Hey, come on! What do you want from them? It was every woman for herself! They would have had to fight each other eventually.

[Gail kicks Michelle out of the ring like a pile of refuse. Gail calls for a microphone. She stands in the middle of the ring, soaking in the boos. Instead of bringing the mic up to talk, Gail smiles and points to the tron.

A disturbing image appears. Awesome Kong… in the men’s room… absolutely demolishing a “random” individual. Kong finishes with a belly to belly right into the side of a stall. The man is not moving. Kong grins a wicked smile as the image fades.

Gail Kim nods, and finally brings the microphone up to her mouth.]

Gail Kim: Women’s wrestling is NOT a piss break. It is not a food break. It is not the time to go out and buy the latest piece of crap with John Cena’s face on it. Though… I understand why you would think so. Women’s wrestling has been a dying art form…

But… I started something in TNA. Where I was the first “Knockout” champion. My battles with Awesome Kong were the very makings of legend. We were trailblazing a Women’s division that women everywhere could be proud of! But then… “The Beautiful People”. Instead of having the very best female athletes compete, these two… harlots stole the focus of the entire division! Concerned only about their looks, and with being “beautiful”, they cared nothing for the industry! I turned my back on the company, as they allowed such a travesty to occur. As the division that I had pioneered was so corrupted.

I went back to the WWE… only to find things more desolate than ever before. Female “wrestlers” who didn’t know a chinlock from a headlock… many who weren’t even dignified with a last name! Then there was LayCool… who were an even greater disgrace than The Beautiful People. The very title that we contended for… turned into a GIANT PURPLE BUTTERFLY! Never before had women’s wrestling been so demeaned.

How? How did it get so bad? How did we go from Trish Stratus, who barely kept things alive herself, to this? I can answer that question. Mickie James. She was passed the torch... and failed at every turn! Instead of leading women’s wrestling into a new age, she let it degrade into THIS.

Veronica Preston wanted a strong women’s division in her federation, and Kong and I… we are going to ensure that she gets it! We are well on our way to putting The Beautiful People and LayCool out for good… next… Next we eliminate the poison that is Mickie James.

But first… tonight… Beth Phoenix has challenged Awesome Kong. Beth… believe it or not… we have nothing against you. Were you not forced to compete in such a joke of a division… you could have been something great. You could contribute greatly to the building of a new and glorious era for women’s wrestling. So you get one chance, and one chance only. Join The Movement and I’ll tell Kong to let this challenge slip by unanswered… refuse… and Kong will destroy you.

[The Ultimatum laid down, Kim lowers the microphone.]

[14 Minutes, Winner by Submission: Gail Kim]

Emma Dilemma: Strong words from Gail Kim…

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[A limo pulls up in the parking lot. The back door opens and John Cena exits in a suit, with the World Title slung over his shoulder.]

John Cena: THE CHAMP IS HERE!!

[He yells to no one in particular.]

John Cena: Now… to find Alberto Del Rio…

[Cena takes a deep breath, shines the title with his sleeve momentarily, and then puts on a vintage Cena smile as he heads into the arena.]

Tony Gooch: YES! The champ is here! We can all breath easy!

Emma Dilemma: The Unofficial champion, remember. He’s just holding on to that belt… but I wonder what he wants with Alberto Del Rio? Don’t go away, we’ve got plenty of great action still to come, with part two of our Unnamed Title Tournament up next! The winner of the tournament gets to name the belt!

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COMMERCIAL BREAK. (A commercial with John Cena endorsing his own brand of Razor Blades and Shaving Products is shown.)

===========================

[Eric Young is stretching backstage… when all of a sudden Darren Young comes out of nowhere with a hug!]

Eric Young: Get off me, you freak! We are NOT related!

Darren Young: Yeah, I know that. I got it all figured out. You see, I was separated from John Cena at birth… and the Youngs, my foster parents, took me in… because they had earlier given up their OWN son for adoption… you!

Eric Young: Right. Then I was coincidentally adopted by another set of Youngs. Also, I am inexplicably white despite my REAL parents being black.

Darren Young: Hey, my real parents were white. It happens. Things get mixed up, I don’t know how it works… But you see… even though I’m not a blood relative… I love my foster parents… and I would be glad to consider you yet another brother! Man, I’m so lucky lately! Me, you, and John should all do something together! Ooh, we should go bowling! I’m sure he’d love tha-

[Eric Young slaps Darren Young hard across the face.]

Eric Young: Stay. Away. From me. You nutjob.

[Eric walks away, leaving Darren once again looking heartbroken and dejected.]

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Match #2: Shelton Benjamin vs. Eric Young: Unnamed Title Tournament Round 1

Tony Gooch: Well that was just downright weird and confusing.

Emma Dilemma: Well, Eric Young now scheduled to go up against Shelton Benjamin in a first round Unnamed Title Tournament matchup. Last week these two were partners in a losing effort. I talked to both men earlier today and they were both unhappy with last week… perhaps looking to prove themselves once again this week to our audience.

[Shelton Benjamin enters to a nice reaction. Eric Young enters afterwards to a slightly less nice reaction. The bell rings and they lock up. It is a fairly competitive match, as the momentum swings back and forth several times. In the end, Shelton hits the Paydirt out of nowhere and picks up the one, two, and then the three as well.]

Emma Dilemma: Shelton Benjamin has done it! A fast paced match-up with impressive showings from both men, but in the end it is Benjamin with the win!

Tony Gooch: And Eric Young beginning to stir… and he doesn’t look pleased one bit!

[Eric looks slightly frustrated as Shelton heads up the ramp…]

[10 Minutes, Winner by Pinfall: Shelton Benjamin]

===========================

[We are backstage. Interviewer Monica Vielle is standing by with Dolph Ziggler.]

Monica Vielle: Dolph. Last week it was Sting versus Alberto Del Rio for an opportunity to fight for the World Title at Wrasslepalooza. You got involved in the match and intentionally caused Sting to be disqualified, handing the victory to Alberto Del Rio. Are you in cahoots with Del Rio?

Dolph Ziggler: No, I am not in “cahoots” with Alberto Del Rio.

Monica Vielle: Then why?

Dolph Ziggler: The why is simple. I’m Dolph Ziggler. I used to go around telling everybody that as often as I could. I’m one of the best in the world… but I have been constantly overlooked and underestimated. Here in the UCE… I have the opportunity to stop telling people my name… and instead… MAKE my name. I have-

[Ziggler is cut off as Alberto Del Rio swaggers into the frame and into the face of Dolph Ziggler. Del Rio has his patented grin on his face… but it fades into serious face.]

Alberto Del Rio: Last week… you put your hands on me. Slapped me right across the face. You gave me the victory, yes… but Alberto Del Rio did not need your “help”. Everybody knows I was well on my way to beating Sting. Tonight we are partners… but if you ever… EVER… try something like that again… you won’t get the chance to make your name, because I will make you nothing but a memory. [Spanish Goes Here]

[Alberto and Ziggler stare each other down.]

Emma Dilemma: Well… Ziggler and Del Rio will be teaming later tonight to take on AJ Styles and Sting… but will they be able to coexist?

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COMMERCIAL BREAK. (A commercial with John Cena endorsing his own brand of Energy Drink is shown.)

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[Mickie James is getting ready for action in the women’s locker room. A.J. bounces in.]

A.J.: Hey Mickie!

Mickie James: Hey, A.J.

A.J.: Listen, I just wanted to tell you not to pay attention to anything Gail Kim says. You didn’t “drop the ball”. You were one of my inspirations to get into this business, and I can only hope to represent women with as much strength and heart as you have. I’ll always be there for you when you need it.

Mickie James: Thanks, that means a lot to me. But I’m not going to let anything Gail Kim says get under my skin. I’ve had all sorts of things hurled at me during my career, and I’ve overcome them all. Gail Kim is no different.

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Emma Dilemma: Mickie James in action later on, but first… our last first round match in the Unnamed Title Tournament!

Match #3: Hernandez vs. Darren Young: Unnamed Title Tournament Round 1

Tony Gooch: Last week Hernandez and Darren Young picked up the victory in the tag match, but Darren wasn’t exactly a fully co-operative partner…

[Darren Young enters to boos. Hernandez makes his entrance next, to a pop. The two lock up in the ring as the bell sounds. Hernandez dominates the early going of the match. Darren turns it around when he slips to the outside and Hernandez goes for the suicide dive and Darren manages to get out of the way. Darren begins to control for a bit on the outside, and then throws Hernandez back into the ring. Darren gets in a few more solid moves before going for… The Five Knuckle Shuffle! He takes too long, and Hernandez moves out of the way and quickly steals the momentum back. Hernandez builds up his special meter and then hits The Border Toss for the three count.]

Emma Dilemma: Hernandez with another impressive victory here tonight!

Tony Gooch: I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again! That man right there is my pick to win it all, SuperMex, Hernandez!

Emma Dilemma: Well, we now know that next week it will be Douglas Williams taking on Rhino, and Shelton Benjamin taking on Hernandez in our semi-finals!

[6 Minutes, Winner by Pinfall: Hernandez]

=========================

[As if on cue, we are taken backstage… where Rhino is lacing up his boots in the locker room! Just then, Christian enters the scene!]

Christian: Hey. What was that last week with James Storm?

Rhino: I told you already. I didn’t see what had happened until it was too late.

Christian: Well, what was he doing out there in the first place?

Rhino: I don’t know… but I didn’t ask for it, if that’s what you’re thinking.

[Christian closely examines Rhino’s eyes for lies, then backs up and nods.]

Christian: Ok.

Rhino: If you don’t believe it, you just watch what I do to Storm later tonight. I didn’t appreciate him getting involved in my business, so I laid down the challenge, and word just came… he accepted.

Christian: … Alright. I’ve got your back.

[Christian gives Rhino a friendly slap on the back and then retreats from whence he came.]

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Match #4: Mickie James vs Sarita

Emma Dilemma: Well, that match will be later on… right now, we have Mickie James against Sarita! Sarita, the latest female signing to the UCE! Sarita, originally from Canada, moved to Mexico to hone her craft and competed and trained extensively there, before finally making her move into the United States, hoping to make an even bigger reputation for herself! I have to say, it will be no easy task against Mickie James!

Tony Gooch: Well, earlier tonight Gail Kim called Mickie James poison for women’s wrestling… but perhaps this bout will change her mind!

[Sarita enters to a mixed reaction, while Mickie James enters to a big pop. A.J. bounces out with Mickie to the top of the ramp and wishes her luck, before bouncing back behind the curtain, in accordance with the Preston’s edict earlier tonight.

The two females lock up and the match is on. It is a fast paced encounter from the outset. Sarita seems to be catching Mickie off-guard with her unique style, and begins to take control. The momentum shifts a few times, back and forth, and the two ladies seem to be really having a battle. The end sees Mickie reversing Sarita and catching her in the Mickie-DT, and pinning her for the three count.]

Emma Dilemma: What a match! Sarita with an impressive showing, but Mickie James picks up the win! I hope Gail Kim is watching!

[11 Minutes: Winner by Pinfall: Mickie James]

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[Beth Phoenix is watching though! On a monitor in the backstage area. Monica Vielle approaches Beth.]

Monica Vielle: Excuse me, Beth… Earlier tonight Gail Kim put out an ultimatum in response to your challenge… either join her and Awesome Kong in their twisted alliance… or she’ll tell Kong to destroy you.

Beth Phoenix: Well… she’ll get her opportunity to TRY. The bigger they are, the harder they fall… And the Glamazon wants to face and beat the biggest challenges of all. The match is ON.

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COMMERCIAL BREAK. (A commercial with John Cena endorsing his own Breakfast Cereal.)

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[Monica Vielle now stands by with AJ Styles and Sting!]

Monica Vielle: AJ, Sting… later tonight you face off against Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler! Your thoughts?

AJ Syles: Well, last week I showed the UCE viewers just who AJ Styles is. I took on and beat Darren Young, and then beat Cena’s little “six minute challenge”. I am in the main event at Wrasslepalooza, and I’m going to show up Cena there too! But there’s another man in the match… Alberto Del Rio. Alberto got in my face last week. He’s another person who seems to think that I am nothing special… well tonight I show Alberto that I’m not only “something special”… but that I am something phenomenal.

Sting: Well… I am NOT in the main event at Wrasslepalooza… and that’s because of one man… Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler said that he wants to “make his name”… well let me tell you, Ziggler… many before you have tried to make their name at my expense… and it NEVER ends well! Tonight… IT’S SHOWTIME!

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Match #5: Rhino vs. James Storm

Emma Dilemma: That match coming up… but first! Rhino takes on James Storm! Storm assisted Rhino with a victory last week over Christian… Storm has refused to make any comments on the matter…. But Rhino is not happy with Storm getting in his business!

[Rhino makes his entrance to cheers. James Storm enters to jeers. Storm is swigging from the beer bottle as he makes his way down, and looks like he is having the time of his life. As he climbs into the ring, Rhino immediately attacks. Rhino dominates the early going, but James Storm manages to turn things around with a well-placed finger poke (to the eyes). Storm begins to dominate. He works over Rhino for a bit, much to the chagrin of the fans. After a few false starts, Rhino finally manages to mount a comeback. Rhino back in control. Eventually, Rhino has Storm down in the corner. Rhino backs off to set up for the Gore. Storm, on the ground, grabs his beer bottle from the corner and takes a sip from it. He then grasps the bottle in hand as he tries to get to his feet. The ref stops him and grabs the bottle away from him. As the ref is placing the bottle back outside, Storm turns around. Rhino runs at him with the Gore, but Storm spits a mouthful of beer in the eyes of Rhino! Rhino staggers back, blinded. Storm with a superkick… and Storm with the victory!]

Tony Gooch: Ha! James Storm with the impressive victory! I like this guy!

Emma Dilemma: What’s so impressive about spitting beer in someone’s eyes?

Tony Gooch: It’s clever, is what!

[Storm grabs the beer bottle again. He takes a swig. He goes over to Rhino and spits it in his eyes again. He then empties the rest of the contents over Rhino. Storm holds the bottle menacingly now…]

Emma Dilemma: I don’t like the looks of this… BUT WAIT! Here’s Christian! The bell has sounded, so he can be out here now without being suspended! Christian going after Storm! He told Rhino that he’d have his back, and he does! Christian sending Storm to the outside with a big clothline!

[Christian goes over to Rhino to check on him… but Rhino levels him with a big right hand that sends him flying to the mat!]

Tony Gooch: And this is how he repays him! Rhino is a lousy friend!

Emma Dilemma: I think he was still blinded! He must have thought that it was James Storm!

[Rhino starts to regain his vision as he wipes his eyes. Christian is on the mat, holding his arms out in the “what the hell, man” pose. Rhino finally sees, and gets the picture. Rhino tries to apologize but Christian shrugs him off, and leaves the ring.]

[10 Minutes, Winner by Pinfall: James Storm]

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[Douglas Williams is backstage. He is addressing the camera directly.]

Douglas Williams: Pathetic. That’s what that was. Rhino is my opponent next week? He can’t even keep his own affairs in order. Certainly he can’t be trusted to name a championship belt with the honor and dignity it deserves. Unlike myself, Douglas Williams. When I win… the belt will be named after a place of culture and history. My homeland of the United Kingdom.

And it WILL be WHEN I win. Who are the other contenders? “Hernandez”? Nothing more than a mere thug who wishes to name the belt after a country whose main exports are drugs and cheap laborers. Last week I made The Great Khali tap out with my superior skills, and Hernandez, as big and strong as he may be, would be no different.

Then we have Shelton Benjamin. We all know his story by now. It is the story of America itself. A lot of promises are made… greatness is foretold… but then inevitably he shoots himself in the foot and fails. Back down to wallow in mediocrity until the next time he starts to show glimpses of “hope”. But we all know the truth… there is no “hope” for Shelton Benjamin.

The only hope there is… is for you all to place your faith in Douglas Williams to bring forth an era of honor and dignity… for the United Kingdom Championship.

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Emma Dilemma: Some harsh words from Douglas Williams to the other semi-finalists…

Tony Gooch: Harsh, but true! That’s why Douglas Williams is, and always has been, my pick to win it all!

Emma Dilemma: Well, we saw John Cena arrive here earlier tonight… but earlier this week I got the chance to have a sit down interview with him, and ask him questions that have been on everybody’s mind since last week. And after that… Beth Phoenix versus Awesome Kong!! Don’t go away!!

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COMMERCIAL BREAK (A commercial with John Cena promoting his Chain Gang Hotline is shown)

======================

[Emma Dilemma sits in John Cena’s palatial looking home.]

Emma Dilemma: Thanks for inviting me here, John.

John Cena: No problem, Emma… and I know exactly why you’re here, so let’s get this over with. I’m a busy man.

[Cena begins to unbuckle his pants belt.]

Emma Dilemma: What? No! I’m just here to interview you!

John Cena: Oh. I knew that. I was just… readjusting. Had a big lunch.

Emma Dilemma: Of course. John, ever since your debut last week on Mindwarp, people have been talking… saying that your attitude has changed somewhat.

John Cena: I don’t see how. I’m still the ridiculously good-looking Superman-like figure that all kids should aspire to be like.

Emma Dilemma: Well, the suits, the plugs for your merchandise, you insisting on being handed the world title… not to mention your treatment of AJ Sty-

John Cena: Hey! Don’t you ever say his name in my house! Bad enough I have to share a ring with him because of a lucky break… I’m not going to have his name being thrown about in my own home!

As for the rest… I was the hottest free agent in wrestling. Everybody was throwing me offers right and left. I wanted more freedom though… and the Prestons gave it to me. I can wear what I want, I can have more leeway in what I do and say, I can control my outside projects… and yeah, I wanted the world title as part of my contract.

But is that so wrong? I am the hero of millions! I just donated three boxes of defective T-shirts to the local orphanage, rather than throw them out! I’m a role model, and a shining example of humanity! Plus, we all know I would have eventually won it anyways, because I’m pretty near unstoppable. If anybody should have it, it’s me. You’d have thought the Prestons would have been all over the ratings that would bring… but no… they tried to screw me.

Well, I say screw them! I AM World Champion, no matter what they say! My lawyers are going over my contract with a Cena-Brand fine-toothed comb! Soon everybody will recognize it, too!

Emma Dilemma: Well, John, I know you don’t want to talk about it, but many are saying that last week, AJ Sty-

John Cena: Hey! I told you not to say that name in my house! This interview is over! I have a meeting with a writer to talk about Volume One of my Official Autobiographical Biography, anyways!

Emma Dilemma: But-

John Cena: I said, the interview is over!

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Emma Dilemma: Well, as you could see, John Cena was not to keen on the subject of AJ Styles.

Tony Gooch: You WERE a bit rude about it.

Emma Dilemma:In any case, let’s move on, because its time for Beth Phoenix, the Glamazon, to challenge herself against a foe unlike any other she has ever faced… Awesome Kong!

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[A brief video package is shown about both Beth and Kong dominating various opponents]

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Match #6: Beth Phoenix vs. Awesome Kong

[Beth makes her entrance to a positive reaction. Awesome Kong enters along with Gail Kim. Gail whispers something to Kong before heading back behind the curtain. Whatever it was, Awesome Kong has that evil grin on her face again.

The fans are going banana as the two women warriors lock horns. Initially, Kong dominates Beth. After awhile, Beth manages to turn it around, and get in some offense. Some quick attacks and… Kong is down to one knee! But Beth can’t finish the job as Kong once again takes control. Lots of “Can anybody stop Awesome Kong” talk going on by the announcers. Beth mounts a second comeback in which she actually succeeds in knocking Kong on her back to the crowd going wild.

Eventually, after some more struggles, Kong takes control and delivers an Awesome Bomb.]

Emma Dilemma: Awesome Bomb! It’s all over! One! Two!

[Kong lifts Beth off of the mat.]

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Emma Dilemma: What’s this? Awesome Kong lifting Beth Phoenix up! Why? OH NO!! AWESOME KONG WITH ANOTHER AWESOME BOMB!

[Awesome Kong once again pins Beth, but picks her off the mat before the three count.]

Emma Dilemma: No! She’s out! Just finish this!

[Kong picks up Beth and delivers a third Awesome Bomb.]

Emma Dilemma: Somebody has to come out and stop this!

Tony Gooch: Nobody CAN stop it! Remember, if anybody comes even so much to ringside tonight before the bell rings, they’ll be suspended!

Emma Dilemma: Why isn’t the referee stopping it?! Beth Phoenix is out cold!

[Kong still isn’t finished, as she grabs Beth up onto her shoulders and delivers the Accordian Rack, bending Beth almost in half.]

Emma Dilemma: BY GOD SHE BROKE HER IN HALF!!

[After a few wrenches, Kong tosses Beth off her shoulders. Finally she places a foot on Beth. The ref counts one, two, three. The bell finally sounds.]

Emma Dilemma: Finally, it’s over! But I think… Beth needs help out here… now.

[Gail Kim comes out from behind the curtain, clapping. She walks down the ramp and into the ring, standing with Kong over Beth’s immobile body. Gail grabs a microphone and talks over Beth.]

Gail Kim: You brought this on yourself! We gave you a choice!

Emma Dilemma: My God… Beth Phoenix is a wreck… this is worse than last week’s carnage… can anybody stop these two maniacs?!

[As if on cue, Mickie James music hits, and she comes out with A.J. in tow. Mickie has a mic.]

Mickie James: I have seen far too much! Gail, I do not know what is wrong with you… and now I don’t want to know! You say that you want to bring women’s wrestling into a new age of glory… and you start by destroying one of its best and brightest competitors? You say that I’m poison? I say that YOU’RE poison! Next week, A.J. and I… we challenge you and Awesome Kong to a match! You want women’s wrestling at its best, well you’ve got it!

[Gail starts to laugh in the ring. Kong also chuckles. Medical personnel have emerged to take care of Beth Phoenix]

Gail Kim: You want us? You’ve got us!!

Mickie James: Good! You said that The Movement is just beginning? Well next week… it ends!

Emma Dilemma: Mickie and A.J. versus Gail Kim and Awesome Kong next week… but are they biting off more then they can chew?

Tony Gooch: Of course they are! Awesome Kong just decimated Beth Phoenix, and look at the size of Mickie and especially A.J.! They’re like bite-sized snacks to Kong!

Emma Dilemma: Well… we have to take our final break…. Up next Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler taking on AJ Styles and Sting.

[17 Minutes, Winner: Awesome Kong]

=======================

COMMERCIAL BREAK. (A commercial with John Cena promoting his own brand of sunglasses is shown)

========================

[Alberto Del Rio is backstage with John Cena]

John Cena: Finally, Alberto. I’ve been looking for you all night!

Alberto Del Rio: You must have not been looking very hard…

John Cena: In any case, I wanted to talk to you. I think that we can both agree that AJ Styles got lucky last week. We know that he should not be in the main event at Wrasslepalooza. It should be John Cena versus Alberto Del Rio. One on one. The buyrates would be off the charts! But instead we have AJ Styles now, polluting our main event! I think we both agree that if you see an opportunity to take AJ out tonight… you take it.

Alberto Del Rio: It makes no difference to me whether Styles is at Wrasslepalooza or not. Alberto Del Rio is a man perfected, and I will beat everybody who stands in my path. But let it be also said that Alberto Del Rio… never passes up an opportunity…

=======================

Match #7: AJ Styles and Sting vs. Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler

[The four men make their entrances to the appropriate reactions. The match starts off with Sting and Alberto Del Rio going at it once again. Alberto is showing the same type of drive and aggressiveness he displayed last week. It allows him to eventually get control of Sting. Dolph is tagged in and begins to work over Sting. Dolph and Alberto with the hot tags, keeping Sting isolated. Eventually, Sting makes the hot tag to Styles. Styles cleans house.

The faces now in control for a bit. The momentum shifts a few more times. The end sees Alberto Del Rio as the legal man. AJ has just received another hot tag. AJ ends up hitting the Styles Clash on Del Rio and… gets three count while Dolph just watches and throws his hands in the “forget this” manner.]

Emma Dilemma: AJ STYLES JUST PINNED ALBERTO DEL RIO!! While Dolph Ziggler looked on and did nothing!

[Ziggler just smiles and smirks at Sting as he backs up the ramp. Sting is obviously not satisfied with how much he got his hands on Ziggler in the match and chases after him up the ramp.]

Emma Dilemma: But Sting not done with Ziggler!!

[AJ Styles is celebrating in the ring… when John Cena comes out of the crowd and attacks Styles from behind! Despite this, Styles gets the upper hand and dropkicks Cena out of the ring! Styles continues his celebration as Cena is fuming on the outside, and Del Rio is starting to come to, with a look of bewilderment and shock on his face.]

Emma Dilemma: AJ Styles standing tall tonight, will this be the scene in two weeks time at Wrasslepalooza?! Join us next week!

[XL]

http://www.tpww.net/forums/picture.php?albumid=57&pictureid=1591

NOTE: Large chunks of the show will be hidden behind spoiler tags. Please make sure you read it all.

This is dialogue
This is in-ring action


As the show opens we are treated to the smiling face of Taz standing behind the announce table. He has a house mic in hand.

Taz: Ladies and gentlemen, as you know, several months ago, my regular partner on commentary was involved in an accident while conducting an in-ring interview with Kane. There was a mistake made while loading the pyro, and both he and Kane received severe burns to their faces. Kane returned a month ago, still showing the scars from the incident. Paul Bearer was able to convince Kane to put his mask back on, but my partner was still recovering from the skin graft surgeries he had to endure.

I am proud to announce that he has recovered enough that, starting tonight, he will be rejoining me on commentary. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome back to the IWC – Michael Cole!

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The crowd mostly cheers the safe return of Michael. As Cole enters, it is obvious that he is not 100% recovered. He has bandages still on his forehead and the back of his hands. He is also bald, with large patches of reddened skin on his skull. Taz hands the house mic over to Cole, and goes to shake his hand. Cole points at the bandages and holds his hands up in a “not just yet” motion.

Cole: Thanks for that welcome. It’s a pleasure to finally be back in the IWC. *cheap pop* I want to publicly thank everyone who sent me well wishes, and also everyone who filled in for me on commentary while I was away. As you can see, I’m not completely recovered, but my physicians assured me it would ok to resume my announcing duties, and my therapists say that this will help in my mental recovery from the incident. So what are we waiting for, partner? Let’s get to work!

As they sit down and put their headsets on, the crowd once again applauds Cole.

Ring announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall.

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Making his way to the ring, from Manchester, England, weighing in at 265 pounds, Wade Barrett!

Taz: It’s good to have you back, partner.

Cole: It’s good to BE back, but enough about me, let’s get to business. It’s been way too long.

Ring announcer: And his opponent,

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From Brooklyn, New York. Weighing in at 174 pounds, Low Ki!

Taz: This should be a really interesting matchup, Cole. Last week, Barrett lost a match to Low Ki’s former partner, Brian Danielson. Can Wade have a better showing against the other half of the former tag champions?

Cole: We’re about to find out as once again, Low Ki is on the attack as soon as he gets in the ring.

The much shorter Low Ki starts the match off with a series of kicks to the legs and knees, followed up by punches to the midsection on Barrett. Wade gains a bit of breathing room by connecting with a haymaker that sends Low Ki back a couple steps. Low Ki quickly closes the distance again and resumes his assault, only to have Barrett again plaster him. Ki charges again, but this time Barrett is ready – with a big boot that sends Ki onto his back. Barrett kicks Low Ki in the ribs several times until Ki is able to roll himself to a corner. As the ref backs Wade off, Low Ki pulls himself up by the ringropes. Wade comes in as Ki is still collecting himself and lays in some knife edge chops. Low Ki eventually starts coming back with some chops of his own until Barrett backs to the center of the ring. Low Ki backs up to sping off the rope, ducks under a Barrett clothesline, jumps on the far side middle rope, and connects with a springboard back elbow. Low Ki kips up and ascends to the top turnbuckle. He goes for the Warrior’s Way, but Barrett rolls out of the way. Ki lands awkwardly but is able to roll through. Both men get to their feet at the same time. Barrett swings big – block by Low Ki who connects with a jab to Barrett’s midsection. Barrett pulls back and swings again – another block and jab by Low Ki. Barrett swings again but this time Low Ki ducks as Wade spins around. Low Ki grabs him from behind for a side suplex. Ki scrambles over for a pin attempt, but only gets a 1 count. Ki jumps up and bounces off the far rope for a baseball slide which forces Barrett outside the ring. Low Ki climbs the turnbuckle and connects with a Super Warrior’s Way. Ki gets to his feet, rolls Barrett back into the ring and covers him for the 3.

Winner: Low Ki

As Low Ki celebrates his victory, we notice that Bryan Danielson is at the top of the entrance ramp, clapping for Low Ki. Once Low Ki notices, Bryan stops clapping, points at Low Ki, mouths “Good job”, smiles and walks off. As Low Ki stands in the ring confused, Barrett attacks him from behind with a double axe handle. He then starts putting the boots to Low Ki. Barrett then lifts Ki up and delivers a Barrett Roll. As he stands over Low Ki, Barrett smiles to the camera, then looks down and salutes Ki with a snot rocket.

Taz: With losses to both Danielson and Low Ki in consecutive weeks, Wade Barrett has got to go back to the drawing board and come up with a new strategy, because what he’s doing now, sure ain’t working.

Cole: Later tonight, Bryan Danielson faces the man that Low Ki beat last week, Jey Uso. Also, Dustin Rhodes competes against Vladimir Kozlov. And in our main event, Triple H battles Dustin Rhodes’ right-hand man, Chavo Guererro.

Taz: But up next, it will be the IWC Gateway champion, Carlito, going one on one against Family member Michael McGillicutty.

Cole: What frame of mind will McGillicutty be in after the events of the last week? We’ll find out when we come back.

*** COMMERCIAL ***

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Cole: Michael McGillicuty has been the shining star in the Family ever since Dustin Rhodes brought the young son of Curt Hennig into the group. But he’s got quite a chore ahead of him tonight in the veteran Carlito.

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Taz: Right Cole. Dustin Rhodes has approached our Gateway champ several times about joining the Family, but Carlito seems to want nothing to do with the group.

As the competitors stand in the ring, Michael McGillicutty starts talking to Carlito, apparently trying again to recruit him into the Family, After McGillicutty has said his peace, he extends his hand for Carlito to shake, but Carlito slaps it away. We can hear Mike practically pleading with Carlito and then offers his hand again. This time Carlito takes it, but pulls McGillicutty in for a short arm clothesline, and the match gets started.

Carlito allows McGillicutty to get to his feet and gives him a “let’s go”. They lock up and maneuver for position for a moment. McGillicutty gets the upper hand and wrings Carlito’s arm. Carlito writhes around for a moment before dropping down and rolling through to reverse the move. After holding it for a second, Carlito lets go and steps away. They lock up again and again McGillicutty ends up with the advantage – this time he puts Carlito in a side headlock. Carlito shoves Mike off and into the ropes, catching him with a knee lift. Again Carlito allows McGillicutty a moment. As McGillicutty moves in to lock up yet again, Carlito takes him down with a drop toe-hold. Carlito quickly slides over into a cobra clutch. He sinks it in, but McGillicutty squirms his way to the ropes, forcing Carlito to break the hold. As McGillicutty attempts to gather his wits, Carlito drops an elbow into Mike’s back. Carlito pulls McGillicutty to his feet and sets up to deliver a backcracker, but Mike spins around and chops Carlito. They trade punches while the crowd gives the “boo, yay” chorus. McGillicutty gains the advantage off the exchange, and goes for the McGillicutter. Carlito is able to shift his weight in midair and turn the maneuver into a successful backcracker. He cockily covers McGillicutty as the ref counts 3.

Winner: Carlito

After the bell rings, Carlito doesn’t let up. He continues his assault on McGillicutty with kicks until the ref pulls him away. Carlito breaks free from the referee and mounts McGillicutty, wailing away with rights and lefts. The bell rings repeatedly while the ref unsuccessfully tries to hold Carlito back. More officials are called down to break up the melee, and as they are coming down, we notice Randy Orton at the top of the ramp watching the proceedings.It takes 4 officials to keep Carlito and McGillicutty separated as we notice the ref discussing something with the ring announcer.

Ring announcer: Ladies and gentleman, due to the extra activities, the referee has reversed his decision. Therefore, the winner of this match as the result of a disqualification - Michael McGillicutty!

Cole: Carlito earned that victory with a tremendous reversal, but he couldn’t leave well enough alone and kept attacking McGillicutty.

Taz: Carlito’s Carribean temper cost him big time there, Cole. The extra-curricular activities were completely over the top and uncalled for.

A line of officials are backing Carlito up the entryway. At the top, Carlito turns to Randy Orton, smiles and shakes his hand. Orton grabs Carlito’s arm and raises it in victory.

Taz: What the? Is Carlito aligning himself with Orton against the Family? Talk about a shift of power!

Cole: This handshake definitely looks like Orton and Triple H have been working behind the scenes to gain more allies in their fight against Dustin Rhodes and the Family.

We get a split-screen of the two competitors in the next match walking through the backstage area.

Cole: When we come back, Luke Gallows takes on the monster Abyss.

*** COMMERCIAL ***

We come back to Luke Gallows already in the ring.

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Cole: Luke Gallows has been laying waste to his opponents since joining the IWC a couple months ago. Tonight he’s got his hands full with half of the Tag Team champions - Abyss.

Taz: And of course, Abyss is bringing Paul Bearer along for the ride tonight. I used to think Abyss was about as sadistic as possible BEFORE joining up with Bearer, but he has gotten even MORE evil since then.

Abyss walks up to Gallows and the men stare through each other. Abyss is the first to flinch - with a punch delivered to Luke’s jaw. The two trade blows for a while, eventually swinging wider and wider until they start backing into and coming off the ropes to add more power to their punches. As Abyss comes in for another strike, Gallows gets his leg up and Abyss eats a big boot. Gallows drops into a cover, but only gets a 1 count. Abyss gets up, but Gallows catches him with a belly-to-belly suplex. Another cover but Abyss gets out as the ref counts 2. Gallows is on his feet quickly and starts stomping Abyss, who rolls to the outside to get some advice from Paul Bearer. Abyss climbs back onto the ring apron and is stepping over the top rope when he gets sent right back out to the floor by a Gallows clothesline. As Paul helps Abyss to his feet again, he waves someone down from the backstage area. Abyss climbs the steps to get back into the ring as Kane starts down the ramp.

Cole: What is HE doing coming down here? He’s got no business here!

Taz: Calm down, Cole. I know you’ve got some issues about Kane with everything you’ve been through, but I’m sure he’s got more important things do deal with right now than you.

Cole: You’d better be right, Taz.

Kane stops at the bottom of the ramp. Luke Gallows leans over the top rope and exchanges words with him as Abyss attacks from behind. A forearm smash gets Luke’s attention back on his opponent. Abyss temporarily blinds Gallows with a rake to the face before throwing some jabs into Luke’s gut. Luke rolls out of the ring only to be captured in a running Kane’s arms and driven back into the ringpost. The referee calls for the bell as Kane and Abyss double team Gallows.

Winner by disqualification: Luke Gallows

The crowd sends up a cheer as Matt Morgan comes running down to the ring and pulls Kane off of Luke Gallows.

Taz: All hell has broken loose here as Matt Morgan and Luke Gallows are taking the fight to Kane and Abyss.

Cole: to Paul Bearer You keep him away from me! If he even LOOKS at me wrong I’ll sue you for everything you’ve got!

Taz: Easy there, Cole. You look like you’re gonna crap your pants. Kane’s over on the other side of the ring. He’s not coming this way. Now calm down and have a seat.

As Kane and Abyss fight a retreating battle to the back, we go to Kaitlyn backstage with Carlito.

Kaitlyn: Carlito, in your match tonight against Michael McGillicutty, you emerged victorious only to have the referee reverse his decision because you continued attacking after the match was over. What was the reason for such a vicious attack?

Carlito: Why did Carlito stomp Michael McGillicutty into the mat? It’s easy. Carlito was tired of being bothered about joining the Family. Dustin Rhodes was begging and pleading with me, but Carlito is his own man. When Dustin Rhodes couldn’t take the hint, I had to make sure that the message came through loud and clear.

Kaitlyn: And what do you think of Commissioner Jarrett’s decision that you will face Michael McGillicutty again next week, and if you lose, you will have to defend your Gateway Championship against him at Helloween.

Carlito: Carlito doesn’t care. I beat him tonight, I can beat him next week too. And that, that’ll be cool.

Back at ringside:

Cole: Jeff Jarrett has been busy tonight. We’ve just gotten word that he has also made a match for the Tag Team Championship at Helloween. It’ll be the champions, Kane and Abyss defending the belts against the team of Luke Gallows and Matt Morgan.

Taz: The Masked Menace take on two more masses of humanity in Morgan and Gallows. I just hope the ring can contain these hosses.

Cole: Tonight has been one breakdown after another. With so many combustible elements left to do battle tonight, what ELSE is going to happen? There’s only one way to find out - stay tuned.

*** COMMERCIAL ***

Cole: Welcome back to network television’s ONLY weekly wrestling show, IWC Tuesday Night Titans. We’re just under 3 weeks away from our Helloween pay per view. Helloween will be coming to you live around the globe from Busch Stadium in St. Louis, Missouri, and is brought to you by Tecmo, makers of the upcoming Monster Rancher 6, available soon on all current game systems.

Taz: Nice reading job there, Cole. You might just have a future in this broadcasting thing after all.

Cole: Thanks, smart guy. Turning back to the action, we’ve already got Jey Uso in the ring. He’s been almost desperately trying to gain the favor of the Family, but his losing streak has not gained him much sympathy from the group of second and third generation wrestlers.

Taz: He’s been giving his all, Cole, but just always seems to come up just a little bit short of the mark. Could tonight be the night that he finally turns the corner?

Cole: Anything can happen in the IWC, but in order to do that he’s going to have to overcome former tag champion Bryan Danielson.

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Cole: Meanwhile, we have an unexpected guest here at ringside. It’s Bryan Danielson’s former partner , Low Ki. Why are you here, anyway?

Low Ki: Well, Bryan came out and applauded me after my match with Wade Barrett, and I just wanted to be out here to support him in return.

Taz: Ki, you and Bryan seem to have a friendly rivalry going. Did you intentionally ask for your match tonight after you found out that Danielson had requested a match against the man you beat last week?

Low Ki: Actually yes. Even though we don’t tag as much right now, there’s still a lot of respect between us. He wants to try to prove that he’s better than me, and I know that I’m better than him.

Cole: Serious words from a serious man. If things keep going the way they have been, you may have to back them up sooner rather than later.

Low Ki: If it does come to that, I’ll be ready and welcome the challenge.

The bell rings and we’re underway. Uso and Danielson lock up and jockey for position. Uso’s power allows him to take Bryan over with a hip toss. Danielson is quickly to his feet. As they lock up again, Uso takes the advantage a second time by picking Danielson up and delivering a standing lariat takedown. Bryan rolls out of the ring to recollect himself, and Jey chases. Danielson runs around the corner of the ring and slides in under the bottom rope. Jey gets to the same spot and notices Danielson coming off the far ring ropes to attempt a baseball slide. Uso easily steps back out of the way and Bryan crashes onto the floor. Jey takes advantage of the situation and stomps Danielson repeatedly. Uso notices the referee counting and rolls back into the ring to break up the count. Bryan slowly gets to his feet and gets back into the ring as the ref gets to a count of 6. He attempts to get to his feet, but as he is on all fours, Jey gives a solid punt to his midsection. The referee backs Uso up, allowing Danielson to pull himself with the aid of the ring ropes. Uso notices Bryan’s positioning and runs toward him. Bryan had been playing a bit of ‘possum and low bridges Jey, who finds himself dumped out to the floor. He picks himself up and slaps the canvas with both hands, clearly upset at himself. Uso stomps up the ringsteps and comes back in, charging Danielson immediately. Bryan low dropkicks Jey’s legs out from under him and quickly rolls over to put Uso in a crossface. Uso struggles for nearly a minute before finally succumbing to the pain.

Winner: Bryan Danielson

Low Ki stands at the announce table and applauds for Danielson

Low Ki: Good job, buddy. I knew you could do it.

Taz: Meanwhile, it’s another letdown for Uso.

Cole: He just cannot get into the win column, Taz. It’s got to be frustrating to the son of Rikishi Fatu, who looks like he has something to say.

Jey has grabbed a house mic.

Jey: That’s IT. I’m going to show the Family once and for all that they NEED a man like me on their side. Husky Harris, I want you in the ring next week. I’m going to show ALL of you what I can REALLY do.

Taz: Wow, brave words from Uso.

Cole: I just hope if Husky accepts the challenge that Jey can find that next gear. His ego could really get hit hard if he comes up on the losing end next week. Meanwhile, we’ve still got lots on tap for you, Triple H and Chavo Guerrero in our main event, and up next Dustin Rhodes steps into the ring for the first time since getting blindsided by Randy Orton at Respect. He faces the Moscow Mafioso, Vladimir Koslov when we return.

*** COMMERCIAL ***

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Dustin comes out, looking a bit better than he did last week, but still visibly bruised. He still has a big shiner.

Cole: Taz, do you really think it’s wise for Dustin to have taken this match tonight against Kozlov when he’s still so banged up from the beating Orton and HHH gave him just over a week ago?

Taz: Probably not, Cole, but Dustin’s a tough S.O.B. and won’t back down from anyone. And don’t forget, his mental prowess in the ring is as hard to match as his toughness. You don’t survive being Goldust for 15 years without being able to manipulate people.

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Cole: Koslov was able to pick up a win over a distracted Randy Orton last week, but something tells me that Dustin Rhodes won’t be taken advantage of as easily, especially with Commissioner Jarrett’s no-contact mandate in effect.

Taz: True dat. This should be quite the interesting matchup.

[XL]

A collar and elbow tie-up sees Kozlov easily push Rhodes into a corner for a break. They reposition back to the center of the ring and lock up again, and in short order Rhodes finds himself backed into a corner again. This time the ref has to step in between them to get a break. Dustin shoves Kozlov back. The third time Rhodes gets pushed back he manages to switch with Kozlov and deliver a few chops before the referee intervenes. As both men circle, we notice that Randy Orton has come out to the stage and is watching the match from there. Dustin sees him, but isn’t distracted enough for Kozlov to gain an advantage. Kozlov and Rhodes continue circling, each looking for an opening. Dustin is the first to find one and shoots the leg on Vlad. Rhodes rides Kozlov for a moment before Vladimir is able to roll over and fight his way out. Randy Orton has come halfway down the ramp. Dustin and Kozlov lock up in the middle of the ring again. A standing switch sees Rhodes go behind and put Vladimir in a full nelson. Vladimir sits out to deliver a jawbreaker to Dustin. Orton is now at ringside. Kozlov issues a challenge to Rhodes for a test of strength. They interlock fingers, and Kozlov quickly overpowers Dustin. Rhodes writhes in pain for a moment before getting free from Kozlov’s grip. He backs up into the ropes, comes off and gives a forearm shiver to Kozlov, who doesn’t budge. Rhodes goes again for another shot, but Kozlov shrugs it off again. Vlad puffs out his chest and smacks it a couple times before giving a primal yell. Dustin bounces off the ropes a third time and as he’s about to connect with Kozlov, suddenly Orton appears in the ring right in front of Kozlov. Rhodes is barely able to stop himself before he connects with Orton. They glare at each other for a moment, then a sick smile starts creeping across Orton’s face. Orton raises his arms in his traditional pose, then reaches back and delivers an RKO to Koslov! The referee has no choice but to call for the bell as Randy continues to exact his revenge from last week’s main event against Koslov.

Winner by disqualification: Vladimir Koslov

Taz: Man, that Randy Orton is one smart cookie. He knew that he’d be stripped of the title if he laid a finger on Dustin, but was able to find a way to hurt Rhodes anyway.

Cole: It was definitely an interesting use of the disqualification rules, Taz, but what does this mean for Kozlov? He officially has wins over the World Champ and the #1 contender. His stock has got to be on the rise.

Taz: Absolutely, Cole. A few more wins like this and Kozlov will at the front of the title chase.

Cut to the backstage interview area, where Kaitlyn is standing with HHH.

Kaitlyn: Triple H, you’ve been reprimanded by Commissioner Jeff Jarrett and threatened with suspension for yourself and Randy Orton being stripped of the World Title if you have any more altercations with the Family outside of in-ring action. What are your thoughts about this action?

HHH: You’re still fairly new here, so let me spell it out for you - I earned the nickname “Cerebral Assassin” a LONG time ago. That means that I can mess with people better than anyone around. Jarrett wants me to keep my hands off the Family except during matches? That’s fine. That just means that when I DO get them in the ring, they’re gonna get the beating of their lives. And Chavo, you’re first.

*** COMMERCIAL ***

Cole: Our main event tonight should be very interesting based on the events of the last 10 days.

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Taz: I don’t fully understand what Hunter’s beef with Dustin Rhodes and the Family is or why he started talking to Randy Orton about turning on them, but whatever Triple H’s reasons, he’s definitely on a mission now.

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Cole: You know, we’ve been talking a lot about Rhodes, Orton, and Triple H, but the man that’s been overlooked in this whole mess would have to be Chavo.

Taz: Yeah, Chavo has to feel as betrayed as Dustin, because he’s the one that spoke up and vouched for Orton time and again. If not for Chavo’s actions, Rhodes would probably have not let Randy into the Family to begin with.

HHH attacks Chavo as soon as he starts coming through the ropes.

Cole: And here we go!

Hunter crunches Chavo into the corner and then delivers several back elbows to Chavo’s jaw. He then grabs Guerrero around the neck and pulls him out of the corner for a bulldog. Hunter is quickly to his feet and stomps Chavo mercilessly. HHH pulls Guerrero to his feet and swings down with a double axe handle, sending Chavo crashing back down to the mat. Hunter continues kicking Guerrero as Chavo inches toward the corner. He gets there and the referee makes HHH back off. Chavo gets to his feet as HHH shoves the ref out of the way. Hunter comes after Chavo, but Guerrero drops out of the ring, grabs HHH’s feet and posts him. Chavo then slams Hunter’s leg into the ringpost several times before coming back into the ring. Chavo allows Hunter to get back to his feet with the intention of giving him a spear. As Guerrero closes the distance, Hunter jumps up and lands straddling Chavo’s back. HHH gets back up and grabs Chavo. Two arm hooks and a pedigree later, the referee is raising Hunter’s hand in victory.

Winner: HHH

HHH celebrates his victory by continuing to beat Chavo. The referee calls for the bell to be rung again.

Cole: He’s got to stop this! He’s going to be suspended if he keeps going!

Taz: This isn’t exactly doing any favors for Chavo, either. Sometimes when you’re in the ring, your adrenaline gets the better of you, and you forget what’s going on beyond what’s in immediately in front of you.

Cole: Hunter better remember it soon, or he’s gonna have a lot of time to think about it.

As Triple H continues putting the boots to Chavo, a man in a yellow shirt jumps the rail, busts past security and into the ring and begins pounding on Helmsley.

Cole: Wait a minute! Is that? Who is that?

Taz: Oh my God, that’s Jesse Gordy, son of the legendary Fabulous Freebird Terry Gordy - but what’s he doing here? He’s not a part of IWC!

Cole: He’s here now, and he’s beating the hell out of an exhausted Triple H.

Taz: He’s taking Triple H and turning him into only Double H!

Cole: How long have you been waiting to use that line, Taz?

Triple H escapes the ring and heads up the ramp. As the former Slam Master J attends to Guerrero, the rest of the Family comes running to the ring.

Taz: It looks like both sides of the Orton/Family feud found some reinforcements tonight. Things are getting really interesting. Where are they going to go from here? We may get some more information next week.

We fade out on a shot of Chavo Guerrero and Dustin Rhodes watching up the ramp.

[XL]

BAW

*BAW Rampage opens to the announce team of JB Jeremy Borash and SoCal Val, who welcome us to the show*

Val: Hello everyone! Welcome to BAW Rampage! We are live in the XL Center in Hartford Connecticut! I’m the lovely SoCal Val and joining me is JB Jeremy “Bore”ash…(she laughs at her ‘joke’)

JB: Yes…very funny Val. Tonight is going to be a huge night for sure…The number one contender “The Fallen Angel” will be in action…perhaps wanting to send a message to the BAW Champion, The Undertaker…speaking of who, he’ll be in action tonight as well against…

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Val: Drew McIntyre? But what is he doing here now? The fight’s not scheduled until later…

Drew gets in the ring and pulls out a mic as the fans boo him.

Drew: Last week’s main event was a pure joke…I was labeled the “chosen one” in the WWE, the greatest wrestling company in history, by the owner himself, Mr. Vince McMahon! (fans boo although since we are in Connecticut McMahon’s name gets a tiny pop). But then a funny thing happened…the company suddenly went under…and left me without a job…so then I signed with Bad Ass Wrestling, thinking…nay, KNOWING I was going to be the greatest superstar of all time! (more boos) But I quickly became a afterthought…then, I was denied my privledge…nay, my RIGHT, to be in the main event of the premiere episode of Rampage last week…instead who do we get? A baldy who claims to be a angel, a lazy bum, a stoner…and a FAT SAMOAN! A fat Samoan from TWO second rate wrestling companies! And yet you sheep love him and boo me! (fans boo at McIntyre) So I decided to do something about it….

*Clips of McIntyre’s attack on Samoa Joe last week are played*

Drew: I took out Samoa Joe’s arm, and thus, took out his submission move, his best technique. And now I have the chance to prove to everyone I can hold my own against the BAW Champion tonight! Taker, you better be ready!

*McIntyre leaves the ring as we get ready for the opening contest*


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*RVD comes out in a blue singlet with lightning designs, his name spelled out in thunder. Justin Roberts does the introductions*

Justin: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Battle Creek, Michigan, weighing in at 232 lbs, Rob…Van…Dam!

(RVD does his whole finger point ordeal and the fans chant his name as we head to commercial)

Intro+Promo+RVD intro=10 minutes.

Rob Van Dam vs Jesse Neal

*We return to Van Dam waiting in the ring. He doesn’t notice this at first, but Raven is at ringside in the front row…*

Val: What will happen is Van Dam sees him!?

JB: I dunno but I think RVD needs to concentrate on his opponent…

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*Jesse Neal comes out minus his tag partner Shannon Moore.*

Justin: And representing Ink Inc. from Orlando, Florida…Jesse Neal!

*Neal gets in the ring and we’re underway!*

RVD delivers some swift kicks to Neal’s chest to start, then delivers a dropkick to his face. RVD bounces off the ropes and delivers a rolling thunder, but a pin attempt only gets 2. Neal recovers and punches Van Dam in the head, then whips him into the turnbuckle and splashes him, followed by a kick to the shins. Van Dam shakes this off and whips Neal into the opposite turnbuckle and delivers a splash of his own, then follows up with a hip toss. At this point, RVD spots Raven in the front row and demands to know what he’s doing…Raven doesn’t budge however, while Neal recovers and rolls Van Dam up into a schoolboy! Luckily RVD kicks out at 2. As soon as he does, he attempts to clotheslines the navy man, but Neal dodges and trips him. He goes for a spear as RVD recovers, but he dodges and Neal goes shoulder first into the turnbuckle. As soon as he pulls himself out and turns around…VAN DAMINATOR! RVD mounts the turnbuckle and makes sure Raven is not moving…FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH! 1…2…3!

Winner: Rob Van Dam

As soon as the match is over, Raven bolts into the ring, chair in hand, swings for RVD’s head. RVD ducks and…VAN DAMINATOR TO THE CHAIR! Raven goes down, but he’s still conscious as he watches Van Dam head to the back.

Match=7 minutes

Backstage, Gregory Helms is preparing for an interview

Helms: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, the BAW Intercontinental Champion, Mr. Kennedy….

*Kennedy steps into view*

Kennedy: KENNEDY!!!!

Helms: So champ, tonight there’s going to be a big match that could determine who will be in contention for your title…It’s a contest between Desmond Wolfe and…who else, who else, who was the opponent again…Oh yea the Hurricane!

Kennedy: Ah yes, two big stars in their own right, matter not who wins, for I will remain strong after my successful defense last week! You see…”Greg”, I…

*He is interrupted by a nearby falling crate threatening to crush a stagehand…Gregory Helms has disappeared for the moment and The Hurricane rushes in to save the stagehand before the box falls on him. Hurricane disappears and Helms is back.

Helms: Sorry where were we?

Kennedy: *chuckles to himself* Good luck tonight junior…*he walks off; Helms acts like he doesn’t know what’s going on*

Interview=1 minute.
Shannon Moore is seen cheering up his tag partner Jesse

Moore: Don’t worry about the loss, that match wasn’t important…We got bigger things to worry about…

*Jeff Hardy walks by warming up an stops to say hi*

Jeff: Hey Shannon, how’s it hanging?

Moore: Hey Jeff…good luck in your match tonight…

Jeff: Thanks bro…*hi-fives him, albeit Shannon seems to have done it half heartedly as Jeff leaves*

Daffney vs Chelsea

JB and Val question who gave the OK for this match knowing Chelsea, who is already in the ring, is not a trained wrestler. She’s not even wearing proper ring gear, wearing a nice red dress instead…she looks a bit concerned as her opponent is introduced…

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Justin: And her opponent in this hot ass contest, from the psycho ward…Daffney!

Justin Roberts barely finishes is introductions before Daffney pounces on the poor unsuspecting Chelsea. She kicks her in the face and follows up with several slaps. Chelsea tries to defend herself, but Daffney is too strong for her. She starts pulling her hair and kicking her in the ass (literally), before grabbing the poor girl by the throat and delivers the Lobotomy (swinging fisherman’s suplex) for the 3 count…

Winner: Daffney.

*Despite the win, the psycho girl isn’t finished yet. She grabs Chelsea’s dress and rips it apart to shreds, leaving Chelsea lying unconscious in her green underwear, much to the disgust/delight of the fans.*

*As the refs help Chelsea, JB recaps what happened last week between Skip Sheffield and Heath Slater, including Heath’s attack on his former partner following their lost to the Hardyz, with clips to accompany this recap.*

Backstage-Heath Slater is holding a plastic guitar, pretending to play it. He looks up at the camera…

Slater: Why did I attack my former partner? Because he made me look like a fool! Showing mercy to those stones from North Carolina…and this wasn’t the first time, no no, that wasn’t the only reason I attacked him. It stems back to our days on the now defunct nXt he was a joker and yet was more popular with the fans. Then when the both of us joined Nexus…I was considered a afterthought…but he was the popular one, the big strong guy…only when he went down with a injury did I actually get a chance to shine with everyone else…I don’t need your help Skippy…I don’t need anyone’s help…I’m “The One Man Rock Band!” I’ll show everyone what I’m capable of!

Match+Promos=5 minutes.

The Hurricane vs Desmond Wolfe

A recap of Wolfe’s attack on the hot asses followed by Hurricane’s rescue is played.

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JB: looks like were about to be joined by the IC Champion

Kennedy does his introductions…

Kennedy: Ladies and gentlemen…the head asshole of team asshole is here! He is your BAW Intercontinental Champion!!!! From GREEN BAY WISCONSIN!!!! MRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! KENNEDY!.....(wait for it…wait for it…) KENNEDY!!!!

He sits with JB and Val to call this next match…

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Wolfe enters the arena with jeers from the fans. One young fan throws his empty drink at him and hits him, but Wolfe doesn’t flinch…

Justin: This match is set for one fall. Introducing first, from London, England, weighing in at 225 lbs…Desmond Wolfe!

He gets in the ring and glares at the entranceway for his opponent…

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The lights in the arena go green and Hurricane ‘flies’ out of the curtains without any proper introduction and clobbering away at Wolfe without to get the match started.

Kennedy: If either one of these men want a shot at my title, they need to prove it to me right here and now...

Val: Anyone you’re hoping to face?

Kennedy: Hurricane is a funny funny guy, and Desmond can be a challenge…in my mind, either one would be awesome…

Hurricane delivers a cross body to Wolfe, but he’s caught and given a back breaker. Wolfe follows up with a dropping headbutt to the downed superhero but that’s only good for 2. Wolfe pulls back and kicks Hurricane in the face, picks him up, and delivers a cross chop to the throat. He picks him up for a bodyslam, but Hurricane counters and gets behind Wolfe, delivering a reverse DDT. A pin attempt only gets a 2.

The IC Champ watched with careful consideration, knowing he may have to face either man soon…

Wolfe arm drags Hurricane, who counters with elbows to the face. Both men bounce off the ropes and collide with each other’s heads, causing both to go down. Hurricane recovers first and rolls up Wolfe to get a near fall, but Wolfe kicks out. Wolfe backs himself into a corner as the hero charges. Wolfe jumps up and delivers a mule kick to Hurricane’s back, then throws him into the turnbuckle, apparently setting him up for the Tower of London, but the hero counters the maneuver by kicking off of the turnbuckle, flinging himself forward while grabbing Wolfe’s neck, and pulls Wolfe down into a cutter. As Wolfe recovers, Hurricane delivers a shining wizard and covers him. Wolfe puts his foot on the bottom rope just before the ref’s hand goes down a 3rd time. Desmond Wolfe recovers and tackles the masked man and pounds away, locking in a cobra clutch. The hero fights his way to the ropes, but Wolfe pounces on him some more. He kicks his knee and takes him down with a devastating suplex, but gets 2. He climbs the turnbuckle and delivers a dropkick from the top ropes. Once again only gets 2. Wolfe picks the hero up and delivers a fallaway slam…only for Hurricane to land on his feet. Wolfe charges, Hurricane dodges and grabs Wolfe from behind…he nails the eye of the hurricane! 1…2…3! This one is over.

Winner: The Hurricane.

Kennedy congratulates Hurricane on a job well done as Wolfe recovers. The sore loser attacks Hurricane from behind and rams him into the turnbuckle. He looks to score a Tower of London on him, but Kennedy has other plans and hits the ring to attack Wolfe. The two of them brawl for a few moments before Kennedy gets Wolfe in position for the mic check. All of a sudden, Kazarian comes out and grabs hold of Kennedy’s intercontinental title and nails him from behind with it. Wolfe looks at Kennedy, then at Kaz and tells him something along the lines of “I didn’t need your help…” but the audience couldn’t hear.

Match+Beatdown: 12 minutes

Backstage-Maryse interviews Christopher Daniels.

Maryse: Bonjour, Fallen Angel…any comments for The Undertaker tonight or for your match in 3 weeks at “Road 2 Ruin”?

Daniels doesn’t say a word. He has his cloak over his head and he leaves the area…

Val: Well that as awfully rude of Chris. I know Maryse can be a you know what sometimes but the least he could have done was say something…

The Hardyz vs Team 3D

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Justin: The folloing tag contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Cameron North Carolina, at a combined weight of (Val: *coughAllegdly…*) 461 lbs…Matt, and Jeff, the HARDYZ!

*The brothers Hardy get into the ring as JB makes a brief but important announcement.*

JB: This is a big match for both teams. Not only is it old rivals facing each other, but we have learned that at Road 2 Ruin, we will crown our first ever BAW Tag Team Champions! So this match is certainly important for both teams to show off what they got…

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Justin: And hailing from Dudleyville, Bubba Ray and Devon….TEAM 3D!!!!

Devon and Jeff start off. Jeff delivers a big boot to the face and bounces off the ropes, delivering a plancha to Devon, who recovers fast and pounds away at Jeff, nailing him with a pumphandle slam, then tags in Bubba, who follows up with a body slam. Jeff kicks out before 2, and once he recovers, tags Matt in. Matt bounces off the ropes and attempts a flying clothesline, but it’s reversed into a sidewalk slam from Bubba Ray for 2. Bubba drops a elbow that Matt dodges and counters with a kick to the jaw. He whips the larger man into his corner and tags Jeff back in, who mounts the turnbuckle and delivers a hurricanrana. A pin attempt gets 2…

Ink Inc. is backstage watching the match again…

Bubba grabs Jeff and body slams him into the ground, then tags in Devon, who mounts the turnbuckle…Bubba grabs Jeff’s legs and spreads them…here it comes…

WAZZUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Devon headbutts the crotch…but Matt breaks up the pin. Jeff rolls Devon up in a small package but to no avail…He’s whipped into his own corner and matt makes the blind tag, then joins his brother in a double team clothesline to Devon. Matt delivers a leg drop and pins Devon, but Bubba breaks it up. Once Devon gets in the corner, Bubba makes the tag and gives a headbutt to Matt. He whips him into the ropes and powerslams him into the canvas. Jeff breaks up the pin attempt. Bubba picks Matt up and is kicked in the gut. Matt bounces off the ropes, kicking Devon off in the process, and shoulder tackles Bubba to the ground. He turns to his corner and tags in Jeff, but stops him from getting in the ring, as he apparently has a idea…

Jeff! (JB: Wait…don’t tell me! Are they? Val: No they wouldn’t….) GET THE TABLES!

Val: They’re stealing a page out of Team 3D’s playbook!

Jeff goes to the outside and goes under the ring, pulling out some lumber to the delight of the crowd…and then all of a sudden is blindsided by Shannon Moore! The ref sees this and calls for the DQ as Matt quickly spills to the outside to assist his brother but gets taken out by Jesse Neal. Shannon grabs the table and orders Jesse to get another, to which he does so, but not before delivering a spear to Bubba Ray. He pulls out the table and sets it into the ring and is met with fists from Devon, but Shannon comes in with his table and kicks Devon in the back of the head. After setting one of the tables up in the corner, Ink Inc. grab Jeff and throw him right into it, shattering the wood to pieces…The other table has been set up as Devon stagers to his feet…Neal and Moore set themselves up and….

3D! Ink Inc. send Devon through the table with Team 3D’s own finisher! They stand tall over both teams as the fans voice their disapproval.

Winners by DQ: The Hardy Boyz.

Match+Beatdown: 10 minutes

We return from the break with…GONG!

*The lights in the arena go out and fans go nuts, expecting to see the champion…instead they get…*

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Daniels makes his way to the ring with a entrance very similar to the Undertaker’s...He enters to the ring, with a soulless look in his eyes as fans boo the fact that they didn’t get Taker.

Justin: Introducing first, from the city of angels, “The Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels!

JB: Some people have doubted if The Fallen Angel deserved this title shot or not especially since he did tap out to Samoa Joe last week before McIntyre’s attack…

Val: Well tonight he has a chance to redeem himself against his opponent…

Christopher Daniels vs. Percy Watson

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*Percy makes his way to ring in yellow glasses and ring attire, showboating to the crowd all the way as he enters the ring…*

Justin: And from Lawton, Oklahoma, weighing in at 235 lbs, “Showtime” Percy Watson!

Once Watson is in the ring, Daniels pounces, whipping his chest several times and follows up with a enzuiguri. Watson starts to come back with a hip toss and goes for a armdrag. Daniels counters this and tosses Percy into the ropes, then trips him and locks in the crossface. Percy is able to get to the ropes, but is met with a STO from Daniels. A pin attempt gets 2, so Daniels climbs the turnbuckle and delivers a crossbody, but this too is only good for 2. He goes to grab Watson, who surprises the fallen angel with a small package….1…2…NO! Daniels kicks out, and is easily frustrated by the near fall so he starts pounding away at Watson and nails another enzuiguri. He picks him up and puts him in position for the Angel Wings…nails it! Daniels could have gone for the pin, but instead mounts the turnbuckle. He looks to the crowd and decides to mock the Undertaker by doing the ‘slitting the throat’ motion of his…Jumps off! BME! BEST MOONSAULT EVER TO WATSON. He covers Percy and it’s over…

Winner: Christopher Daniels.

Afterwards, Daniels leaves the ring and prepares to head to the back without once looking back to the ring…but everyone could already tell he was going to keep a eye on this main event…

Match=6 minutes.

The Undertaker vs Drew McIntyre

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McIntyre makes his way to the ring with little to no fanfare except boos from the crowd.

Justin: This is BAW Rampage’s main event, set for one fall! First, from Ayr, Scotland, weighing in at 250 lbs, Drew McIntyre!

*A few hold up their undertaker signs. The famous gong goes off again…*

*Here comes the champion, title around his waist…he slowly gets in the ring…*

Justin: And his opponent, from Death Valley, weighing in at 300 lbs! He is the BAW World Champion…The Undertaker!!!!

Drew McIntyre pounces on Taker as he enters the ring. He grabs his arm and kicks the shoulder, then whips him in the ropes and applies a sleeper hold. The champion runs backwards and rams McIntyre into the turnbuckle to shake him off. McIntyre comes back with a running shoulder tackle and covers for a quick 2. Taker grabs McIntyre and body slams him, followed by a leg drop off the ropes. Cover only gets a 2, but the champion won’t let it phase him. Once McIntyre gets up, Undertaker delivers a big boot to the face. Then he moves near the corner and waits for the younger superstar to get up again. Taker grabs McIntyre on his shoulders and goes to the turnbuckle. He nails Snake Eyes and grabs McIntyre’s throat, going for a chokeslam. McIntyre reverses with a kick to the midsection, followed by another and delivers a dropkick to the head. He grabs Undertaker’s legs and locks in a boston crab, clinching it for a few seconds before Taker grabs the ropes, but the hold isn’t broken, causing the ref to start counting…1…2…3…4

McIntyre: *gets in the ref’s face* I HAVE TIL 5!

The fans boo McIntyre after this statement. He goes for a running knee, but Taker rolls out of the way, sending Drew to the outside. He climbs back to the ring and is pulled inside by Undertaker, who stomps away at his downed opponent. McIntyre counters with a boot to the head, then another to the knee, and grabs Taker in the position for the future shock, but the champion holds the ropes, preventing the maneuver to be delivered. Drew bounces off the ropes and goes for a clothesline, but Taker ducks and slams his elbow in Drew’s face, taking him down. Taker goes in position for the chokeslam as McIntyre staggers back to his feet….when all of a sudden, the lights go out…

JB: Did the electricity go out or something?

Val: What is this? Is this Undertaker’s doing?

“Lightning” strikes and lights flash and flicker before the lights come back on. McIntyre and the ref are gone, and in their place, Christopher Daniels stands in the ring behind Taker. He dropkicks the dead man from behind and pounds away. Daniels gets on the ropes and nails a flying enzuiguri and quickly climbs the turnbuckle. He attempts a cross body, but Taker grabs the fallen angel and has him on his shoulders, ready for the tombstone piledriver. Suddenly, Daniels lands back on his feet and reversed the maneuver on Taker, nailing the tombstone on HIM! With the phenom down, Daniels does his Fallen Angel pose as the fans boo, although some marks cheer him on as the lights go out again. More lightning strikes and once the lights come back on, Taker does his “pop back up” trick, only to find Daniels is gone. The show closes on Undertaker rolling his eyes in the back of his head, vowing vengeance on The Fallen Angel

No Contest

Match=14 minutes.

[XL]

HARD KNOCKS WRESTLING PRESENTS: CRAM SESSION
WEEK TWO
**

We open to Matt Striker in the middle of the ring with a microphone.

STRIKER: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for once again allowing Hard Knocks Wrestling into your homes, and welcome to the next installment of Cram Session! Now, last week’s main event was marred in controversy to say the very least…

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Matt Striker is interrupted by “The All-American American” Jack Swagger with a microphone. He wears a protective hard plastic mask over his face to cover what can be assumed to be a broken nose. He stares intently at Matt Striker as he makes his makes his way to the ring to face him.

SWAGGER: You’re right, Matt. Last week WAS marred in controversy…but the main event wasn’t the biggest travesty of the night. Look at my nose, Matt. (screaming and pointing to his face) LOOK A IT!

STRIKER: I’m sorry about the condition of your nose Jack, but this is a very physical sport. Accidents happen.

SWAGGER: This wasn’t an accident! This was a result of a blatant cheap shot before the bell from Kurt Angle! He should be PUNISHED for attacking me before the match even started, but you’ve gone as far as to give him a TITLE SHOT? You’ve got to be kidding me! Everybody here knows that he’s just an older, shorter, slower, uglier, more washed up version of me! If that match would have gone down cleanly, the main event for Graduation would EASILY be Jack Swagger versus The Big Show.

STRIKER: I’m sorry you feel that way, Mr. Swagger…but perhaps Kurt’s actions had something to do with the fact that you run your mouth a little too much.

Before Swagger has a chance to reply…

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Chris Jericho enters in a suit. He also has a microphone. He walks directly to the ring, nudging past Swagger and getting close to Matt Striker. Swagger does not look happy, but he lets Jericho speak his mind.

JERICHO: If this novitiate is finished rambling, I have some big boy talk to discuss with you, Striker.

Swagger rolls his eyes, but lets Chris continue as he folds his arms across his chest.

STRIKER: I’m not sure if this is really the best time to talk right now.

JERICHO: Oh, but it IS Striker. As you are fully aware, I am the absolute best in the world at what I do. A general manager would have to be an absolute ignoramus to not put me in the main event of his company’s inaugural pay per view.

STRIKER: I understand your vexation, Chris. Last week’s match did get a little out of hand.

JERICHO: A little? Your crack referee team managed to get knocked out and seduced. Team Awesome decided to behave like a bunch of savages. People can act like The Big Show was the victim all they want, but I was just as much a victim as he was! Kurt Angle has never liked me, and he showed EXTREME bias as a referee. If you’re a smart man Matt Striker, and I’ve heard that you are…you will do something right now to correct this problem, or you may as well flush your precious little Graduation main event down the commode.

STRIKER: Believe it or not, I actually do agree with you on some of what you just said. As a matter of fact, I was so outraged with Team Awesome’s actions last week that I’ve placed them in detention for this week!

Chris Jericho shudders.

JERICHO: This whole school motif was pretty unimpressive to begin with, but actually giving somebody detention is reaching a whole new level of idiocy.

Jack Swagger nods in agreement. Matt Striker smirks and brushes off Jericho’s comment.

STRIKER: Now, what detention means is that if ANY MEMBER of Team Awesome so much as steps foot on that entrance ramp and enters the ring area tonight, all three of them will be BANNED from any sort of title contention INDEFINITELY! I suggest they spend their time tonight watching the monitors and doing their homework on what it actually takes to be successful here in the school of Hard Knocks.

Chris Jericho and Jack Swagger roll their eyes at each other before Jericho turns back to Striker, unimpressed.

JERICHO: I don’t care if those idiots are on time out, or if you gave them demerits, or if you took away their recess…that doesn’t put me back in Graduation’s main event.

SWAGGER: Yeah! Me neither!

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Batista now makes his way to the ring with a microphone. Matt Striker is becoming visually agitated at all of the interruptions. Batista looks considerably calmer than he did last week. Jack Swagger is not impressed with Batista, but Chris Jericho smiles, applauding him profusely as he enters the ring. Batista gives him an inquisitive look before turning his attention to the general manager.

BATISTA: You know Matt, I was doing some thinking about what you said last week, and you’re right. Somebody who is as big of a star as me should definitely be in the race for the heavyweight title here in uhhh….here in….

Batista looks around quickly for a banner with the promotion’s name on it or something. Chris Jericho leans in and says “Hard Knocks Wrestling”.

BATISTA: Oh, right….here in Hard Blocks Wrestling!

Chris Jericho slaps his own forehead. Matt Striker gives Batista an incredulous look.

STRIKER: So hold on Dave, let me get this straight…after you walked OUT of a title opportunity that I tried to give you last week, you then attacked Sean Morley for no reason…and now you want to come out here to interrupt me AND ask for another title opportunity? On top of that, you don’t even remember the name of my promotion? Is this part of your stand up comedy routine or something?

BATISTA: All right Striker, I’m gonna level with you. My agent told me that winning the title here would be good publicity for me. He says that I can use it to catapult my stand up career, and if that’s what it’s going to take, that’s what I want to happen. You wanted to give me a title shot last week anyway, so why don’t you just give it back to me now and make the main event at Graduation a triple threat or something?

STRIKER: So you’re telling me that you only want back into the heavyweight title soon because your AGENT suggested it?

Batista shrugs.

STRIKER: That’s a disgusting notion, Dave. You know how much respect I have for this business, and you know the passion I have for this sport. Your actions last week were disrespectful to me, disrespectful to the heavyweight title, disrespectful to my staff, and disrespectful to YOURSELF.

Kurt Angle and The Big Show appear together at the top of the ramp with no music and microphones. Matt Striker notices them.

STRIKER: Let me guess…you guys have some demands for me too? Do none of you people want to see me succeed with this organization?

BIG SHOW: Hold on Boss Man, we come in peace. You see, Kurt and I are both delighted and honored to be headlining Graduation.

ANGLE: It’s true. It’s damn true. We see nothing but bright things in the future for Hard Knocks Wrestling…you know, if we look outside of those three jackasses in the ring with you.

Swagger and Jericho shout insults at The Big Show and Kurt Angle. Batista remains fairly nonchalant.

ANGLE: You see, the difference between guys like The Big Show and I and guys like you three in the ring is that we don’t have to bitch and moan to accomplish whatever we want to. We let our actions do the speaking. Another big difference is that we actually RESPECT this sport…Mr. Striker, I know those guys are causing you a headache right now, but Show and I came up with a plan that should make everybody happy.

STRIKER: I’m all ears at this point.

BIG SHOW: Kurt and I both know that we deserve our spots in the main event of Graduation, but we’re not going to pretend that there weren’t some shady actions going on. So in the spirit of competition and to make things fair again, I am offering to put my spot in the match on the line tonight against Chris Jericho, since he wasn’t involved with Team Awesome…and we can throw Batista in there too for a triple threat, just because I’ve really been wanting to knock him out ever since I heard that awful stand up routine last week.

Batista becomes enraged, motioning for The Big Show to come meet him in the ring. Chris Jericho seems intrigued by The Big Show’s idea.

ANGLE: Also, since poor little Jacky Wacky wants to throw a temper tantrum because he went barking up the wrong tree, I’m offering to put MY spot in the Graduation main event on the line, one on one against him TONIGHT.

Jack Swagger smiles, eagerly rubbing his hands together. Matt Striker seems impressed.

STRIKER: Gentlemen, I think those sound like great ideas. Why don’t all of you go back and get dressed for competition tonight?

Angle and Show leave the stage, while Jericho, Batista, and Swagger file out of the ring, all seemingly satisfied.

STRIKER: Now, before I was interrupted, I DID have an announcement to make. Due to injuries sustained at the hands of Batista last week, Sean Morley is not able to be here tonight. We wish him the best and hope to see him soon. In the mean time though, please give a nice Hard Knocks welcome to tonight’s ring announcer and color commentator…

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Mick Foley makes his way to the ring wearing a tuxedo t-shirt under his patented flannel and sweatpants. He slaps hands with the fans on the way to the ring and shakes hands with Matt Striker when he enters. Striker heads to the announce position as Mick Foley gets set to announce tonight’s first match.

FOLEY: This match is scheduled for ONE fall…

*****

THE DUDEBUSTERS v. THE MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS

The Dudebusters (Trent Barreta and Caylen Croft) enter first to minimal fanfare. The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin) enter next to a great reaction. They are energetic and excited to finally make their Hard Knocks Wrestling debut. Mick Foley joins Matt Striker at the announce table as the bell sounds.

Chris Sabin and Trent Barreta start things off. Trent offers his hand for Sabin to shake. Sabin goes to accept, but Barreta pulls his hand back and screams “TOO SLOW!” in Sabin’s face. Barreta turns his back to bump fists with Caylen Croft, who apparently thought Trent’s stunt was hilarious. When Barreta turns back around, he is met with a vicious slap right across the face from Chris Sabin. Sabin asks “was that fast enough?’ as he smirks and fires a finger gun at Barreta.

Barreta charges angrily at Sabin with a clothesline, which Sabin ducks. Sabin sends some quick kicks into Barreta’s legs, before jumping up and planting a spinning back kick into Barreta’s midsection. Sabin Irish whips Barreta into the MCMG corner. He follows him in, nailing Barreta with a spinning heel kick as he bounces out of the corner. Sabin makes the tag to Alex Shelley.

Shelley enters by jumping over the top rope and sitting out into a leg drop across Barreta’s throat. He hops up and claps his hands to encourage the crowd to get behind him, and they do just that. Shelley pulls Barreta to his feet and whips him into the ropes. He leap frogs him as he returns, and catches him with a hurricanrana upon his momentum’s return. Shelley is quick to his feet, snapping Barreta to the mat with arm drag after arm drag until the dazed Barreta finds enough of his senses to dive into the Dudebuster corner and slap a tag to Caylen Croft.

Shelley braces himself for Croft’s aggression, but instead of charging in like his teammate did, he puts his hand in the air, challenging Shelley to a test of strength. Shelley shrugs and goes to lock hands with Croft. Croft quickly throws a punch, which Shelley anticipates and ducks. Shelley takes Croft to the mat with a drop toe hold. Croft slaps the mat in frustration before getting to his feet and immediately taken back down with another drop toe hold. Croft pops back up and charges at Shelley, who grabs Caylen’s arm and takes him back to the mat once again with a Japanese arm drag. Croft rolls out of the ring under the bottom rope, slapping the mat repeatedly. The referee begins to administer a ring out count while Trent Barreta drops off the apron to console his partner.

In the ring, Alex Shelley sees an opportunity. He springs off the ropes and comes back with a flying corkscrew plancha over the top rope…and into the arms of the Dude Busters, who catch him in mid-air. They smile at each other, but they have little time to capitalize as Chris Sabin sprints around the apron and hits a rolling senton on all three of the men on the outside. Sabin helps Shelley to his feet, and they appeal to the audience.

***COMMERCIAL***

Things have taken a turn when we come back from the commercial break. Caylen Croft has Chris Sabin in a rear chin lock in the middle of the ring, while Alex Shelley shouts encouragements to his partner from the apron.

A spilt screen replay shows Chris Sabin perched on the top rope, waiting for a dazed Caylen Croft to get to his feet. When Croft finally does, he grabs the referee as a shield. The ref breaks out of Croft’s grasp, turning his back to yell at him. This gives Trent Barreta enough time to run over and shove Sabin off of the top rope. He flips as he falls, crashing hard onto his back.

Back in live action, Sabin appears to be fading. The ref raises his hand, and it falls once. Another raise brings another fall. The third raise almost falls, but Sabin keeps it up, shaking his hand in the air and feeding off the energy of both the crowd and his tag team partner.

Croft has seen this sort of thing too many times. He releases his grip and gets to his feet, driving a knee into Sabin’s spine to keep him grounded. It appears to be enough to stop Sabin’s momentum. Croft throws some vicious stomps, followed by a jumping elbow drop to the chest before tagging in Barreta.

Barreta drops a matching jumping elbow drop and hooks a leg for a cover. Sabin kicks out at two and a half. Alex Shelley continues to encourage Chris Sabin. Trent Barreta mocks Shelley’s effort and takes his eyes off of Chris Sabin for about a second too long. Sabin musters up all of his strength and explodes a perfectly placed super kick into Barreta’s face. Barreta appears to be out as Sabin crawls over, attempting to tag Alex Shelley. Croft runs into the ring and makes a bolt towards Alex Shelley to try and knock him off the apron. Shelley manages to duck Croft’s swing from the apron and elbow him on the temple. Croft reels backwards as Sabin continues on and makes the tag to Shelley.

Shelley jumps over the top rope to enter the ring. He nods at Sabin, and Sabin nods back. Sabin stays in the ring and nails Croft with a spinning sole kick. Alex Shelley follows with a superkick. Before Croft can even fall, Sabin jumps up and nails an enziguiri while Alex Shelley SIMULTANEOUSLY hits another superkick. Shelley makes the cover and the referee counts the three.

WINNERS: The Motor City Machine Guns via pinfall

Shelley and Sabin embrace and appeal to the crowd, but their celebration is short lived, as Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase appear at the top of the entrance with microphones. They are wearing suits and two beautifully crafted championship belts around their waists. Matt Striker mentions this as odd, seeing as to how nobody has been crowned the HKW tag team champions.

DiBIASE: Don’t worry Mick, I’ll take care of this introduction…ladies and gentlemen…boys and girls…overrated acrobats of all ages…

In the ring, Chris Sabin rolls his eyes. Alex Shelley smirks.

DiBIASE: Get up on your feet and pay the proper respect due to the very first Hard Knocks Wrestling tag team champions, Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes!

Matt Striker is beside himself on commentary. Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin grab microphones from a stage hand.

SHELLEY: Hey guys, that’s cool that you went out and got those fancy belts, but I’m pretty sure that you’re supposed to actually…you know…do something before you’re considered to be the champions.

SABIN: Yeah, I feel like I read that somewhere too.

RHODES: Do something? Do you know who our fathers are? Our legacies are the bricks upon the very foundation that is professional wrestling. The talent pumping through our bloodline entitles us to these championships.

SHELLEY: Hmmm…well, that’s a pretty unique perspective you have there, but I think that the talent in this ring trumps whatever you guys THINK you have going for you.

SABIN: Yeah! Plus, we like to wear belts too!

Alex and Chris high five each other.

DiBIASE: You two think you have TALENT? Who are YOUR dads? What have THEY done for the industry?

RHODES: You guys are just a couple flash-in-the-pan gymnasts who haven’t paid a single due. To even suggest that you’re in the same league as us is completely ridiculous.

SHELLEY: Gee guys, I don’t know..that still doesn’t really add up to me. I mean, we just won our debut match here on Cram Session, and you guys seem to have done nothing but spend a lot of money at Highspots dot com.

SABIN: You should have told me, I could have saved you ten percent. I know a guy.

DiBIASE: You guys think you’re REALLY funny, don’t you?

Before Ted can get a chance to continue, the Dudebusters recover and blindside The Motor City Machine Guns. Ted and Cody take this is a cue to run down to the ring and join in on the beatdown. Four men is too much for the Guns to overcome. Ted, Cody, Barreta, and Croft lay vicious stomps into both fallen members of the Guns. Ted picks up Alex Shelley and hits him with Dream Street. Cody picks up Chris Sabin and nails him with Cross Rhodes. Ted pulls two wads of cash from his breast pocket, tossing one to Trent Barreta and the other to Caylen Croft. The Dudebusters exit while Ted picks up Chris Sabin and hits Dream Street on him. Cody picks up Alex Shelley and flattens him with another Cross Rhodes. DiBiase and Rhodes pick their belts up and hoist the over their heads as the crowd reacts negatively. Matt Striker reminds everyone that those titles were NOT issued by Hard Knocks Wrestling.

***COMMERCIAL***

We return to find Batista sitting in a chair backstage. He is reading a book entitled “Carrot Top’s Guide to Prop Comedy”. He chuckles to himself as he reads. Chris Jericho approaches, and Dave puts the book down, standing up to remind us that he towers over Jericho.

JERICHO: Easy there, big man. I just wanted to stop by and let you know that I thought your bit last week was absolutely hysterical.

BATISTA: I know that. I appreciate you for recognizing that. However, don’t think that buttering me up is going to stop me from tearing through you and The Big Show tonight to get into the main event at Coronation.

JERICHO: Graduation.

BATISTA: Whatever.

JERICHO: Look Dave, I’m not here to ask for anything. I just wanted to let you know that I completely respect what you’re doing with the comedy thing. A lot of people are going to try and criticize you just like they criticize me every time I go on a tour with Fozzy. You know why that is? It’s not because you’re not talented…it’s because they’re JEALOUS. They’re jealous of guys like you and me because we excel in numerous fields, while most of the people who watch this show have never succeeded in anything in their miserable lives.

BATISTA: …OK. Is that it?

JERICHO: Yeah, that’s pretty much it…oh, and one more thing. I was talking to some of my friends at VH-1, and they told me that they’re looking to start a half hour comedy series. They’re looking for upstarts, and I told them that I thought YOU would be a perfect showcase for the debut episode.

Batista’s face lights up.

BATISTA: Wait…are you kidding me? You know people at VH-1?

JERICHO: Of course I do, Dave. I must have done at least two hundred episodes of “I Love the 80’s.”…you know, before I got my very own talk show on ABC.

BATISTA: Dude…you’ve got to introduce me to those people.

JERICHO: It’s already been set up. One of the VH-1 guys owes me a favor. Shooting for your half hour special begins in just four weeks. Luckily, that’s just one week after Graduation, so I’ll be able to get front row tickets and cheer you on.

BATISTA: Wow Chris, this is amazing! How can I repay y--…oh, I get it. You’re going to want something from me in return.

JERICHO: Look Dave…I just want a deserving talent to be rewarded. You’re gonna be a stand up KING. I know you said you were just using Hard Knocks Wrestling to catapult your comedy career…and don’t get me wrong, Hard Knocks Wrestling can POTENTIALLY be a nice catapult if everything goes well here. However, it may be in your best interest to realize that some OTHER catapults out there just may be ready to fire right NOW.

Jericho lightly pats Batista’s bicep.

JERICHO: Break a leg out there tonight, Dave.

Batista watches Jericho walk away with a happy…yet confused face.

**

ELIJAH BURKE v. KOFI KINGSTON

Elijah Burke enters first, accompanied by Shad Gaspard. They both wear black t-shirts with the words “LIGHTS OUT” printed on them. Elijah and Shad are strictly business on the way to the ring. Kofi Kingston enters to much fanfare, slapping hands with almost every fan seated along the entrance and all around the front row. Elijah and Shad look on in disgust.

When the bell sounds, Kofi extends his hand for Elijah to shake. Burke just looks to Shad on the outside of the ring and shakes his head in disappointment. Shad nods his agreement before Burke brushes Kofi’s hand away and moves in for a collar and elbow tie up. Elijah and Kofi struggle back and forth in the tie up for a bit until Burke ends up pushing Kofi’s back into the turnbuckles. Burke breaks the tie up and connects with some well-placed body shots, using his boxing background well. Elijah grabs Kofi’s wrist and Irish whips him across the ring into the opposite turnbuckles. Burke follows him in with an attempted clothesline, but Kofi scurries out of the way of the attack as Burke crashes chest-first into the turnbuckles. Kofi catches him in a school boy roll up for a two count.

Both men return to their feet. Burke fakes a left jab, which Kofi dodges, only to be caught with an actual right hook from Burke. Burke sends a well placed knee into Kofi’s midsection as the referee admonishes him for the closed fist. Burke places a couple more knees into Kofi’s stomach before scooping him up and slamming him hard to the canvass. Burke stomps Kofi a couple more times for good measure before positioning himself in the opposite corner. He runs towards Kofi, leaping over him and pressing himself straight up into the air. He holds himself in a handstand for a few seconds before releasing himself and crashing down towards Kofi with an attempted Outer Limits elbow.

Unfortunately for Elijah, Kofi has seen this move before. He sticks both of his legs up and both of his boots catch Elijah square on the chin as he comes sailing down. Shad Gaspard slaps the ring apron in encouragement from the outside as both men struggle to regain their senses. Kofi is the first to move, and he drapes his body over Elijah’s in a pin attempt. Burke kicks out at two and a half.

Kofi isn’t discouraged. He pulls the still groggy Burke to his feet and connects with a couple well placed European uppercuts to the Silver-Tongued Pugilist. Kofi backs Elijah into the corner and climbs up to the second rope. He rains down ten alternating elbows to Elijah’s forehead, and the crowd counts along as each one lands. Kofi smoothly flips backwards off the ropes before thrusting himself into Burke’s midsection. Kofi flips Burke out of the corner with a snapmare before bouncing off the ropes and connecting well with his Boom Drop double leg drop. He hooks a leg with a cover. Burke kicks out at 2.7.

Kofi is still undaunted. He picks up Burke, who doesn’t seem to have much left in the tank. He flips forward, catching his leg behind Burke’s, flipping both men over into a unique pinning scenario. Burke BARELY kicks out at 2.9. Even Shad Gaspard is starting to look worried for Elijah as the match continues. He jumps up on the apron to try and support Burke from closer range. This immediately catches the referee’s attention, as he gets up in Shad’s face, yelling for him to get off the apron before he gets ejected from ringside.

Kofi doesn’t wait for the referee’s words of wisdom to sink in. He hits the opposite ropes for extra momentum and proceeds to twist in the air and kick the bejesus out of Shad’s face with a high impact S.O.S. Shad flies off the apron as the referee realizes that a miscalculation could have just as easily hit him instead. Kofi is fired up now. He runs to a corner and climbs up on the second rope, facing the crowd. He does his signature taunt, and the crowd yells “BOOM!” with him along the way.

Unfortunately for Kofi, the boom is about to get lowered on him. Burke took the time of the previous events to set himself in the opposite corner from Kofi. As Kofi celebrates, Burke runs towards him and jumps up, connecting squarely with the middle of Kofi’s back with double knees. The impact catches Kofi off guard and sends his head smacking into the top of the ring post. Kofi is unconscious, perched on the top rope, face down. Burke pulls him off and hooks a leg in a cover. The referee slaps the mat three times, and this one is over.

WINNER: Elijah Burke via pinfall

[XL]

The still dazed Shad Gaspard manages to pull himself into the ring to celebrate with Burke. The referee checks on Kofi, who doesn’t seem to be moving very much. The big screen buzzes to life, and we see R-Truth standing in what appears to be a music studio.

TRUTH: Hold up there, Elijah and Shad…I’m not in the building tonight because I’m recording a hot new track for my upcoming album…but I made sure to take some time to join you two fools via satellite and try and get to the bottom of exactly what your problem is with me.

A stagehand tosses Elijah Burke a microphone.

BURKE: Are you serious right now, Ron?

TRUTH: Hey now, easy with that Ron business…I go by R-Truth now.

BURKE: And THAT is the problem exactly. You’ve been in this business a long time, so you should know how much of a struggle it is for people like me and Shad here to make an impact…but here we are now, standing before you as a force to be reckoned with in Hard Knocks Wrestling.

TRUTH: A force to be reckoned with, huh? I won my match last week too, you know.

BURKE: I’m well aware, Ron. I have the utmost respect for your in-ring abilities. What agitates US is that you don’t seem to have any respect for YOURSELF. Don’t you remember where you came from? Don’t you remember how hard you had to work to get to where you are? Don’t you remember a time when nobody wanted to give you the time of day just because you didn’t LOOK like somebody that they wanted in their main events? You’re acting like you’ve forgotten. You’re not representing your background well. You’re not trying to show people that they were wrong about you all along. All you’re doing is dancing around, making stupid songs, and trying to make the people happy that would have been perfectly content to see you never amount to anything. Kofi here isn’t much better, either. You’re a sell out, and you’re a puppet, perfectly content to bask in the negative light that the industry has cast upon you. Not us, though. We’re putting those LIGHTS OUT.

Shad gestures towards his “LIGHTS OUT” t-shirt as he nods in agreement. Elijah hands him the mic.

SHAD: I used to be the same as you, Ron. I used to dance around and act like an idiot, because that’s what they wanted me to do. Not anymore, though. Me and Elijah are gonna take this company over, and we’re gonna do it OUR way.

TRUTH: Come on, man. Y’all can’t be serious, can you? You do know it’s 2010, right? What you two need to do is stop making excuses for your shortcomings and get off of my back just because I love my job and I like to have fun with it. THAT’s what I represent, and that’s the truth…the whole truth…and nothing but the TRUTH.

BURKE: We’ll see what’s really true soon enough…


At this point, Kofi Kingston has returned to his senses a bit. Unexpectedly, Shad turns and nails him with a clothesline. Elijah and Shad begin to stomp him on the ground as Truth yells for them to stop from the screen. Matt Striker demands the production truck to cut away.

***COMMERCIAL***

THE BIG SHOW v. BATISTA v. CHRIS JERICHO (WINNER GETS A HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE SHOT AT GRADUATION)

The Big Show enters first, ready to take care of business and prove why he belongs in the main event of Graduation. Chris Jericho enters next, looking extremely confident. Batista’s theme song hits…but he doesn’t appear. The music stops and starts again…and Batista still doesn’t show. After the third time, the referee shrugs and signals for the bell, starting the match without him. Matt Striker is furious on commentary, saying that Batista is a disgrace for apparently turning down ANOTHER heavyweight title shot. Chris Jericho is absolutely crestfallen. The Big Show smiles at him.

Jericho and The Big Show circle each other for a moment before they engage in a collar and elbow tie up. The Big Show easily shoves Jericho back, sending him toppling backwards over himself on the mat. He quickly gets up and engages in another collar and elbow, yielding a pretty similar result. Jericho gets to his feet again, kicking the bottom rope in frustration. The Big Show makes the universal sign for ‘a belt belongs here’ by waving his hands around his waist.

Jericho runs at The Big Show. He ducks a clothesline and continues to the ropes. The Big Show turns around to receive him, but Jericho baseball slides between his legs. Jericho regains his vertical base and hits a vicious chop block on the Big Show’s left knee. The giant drops to one knee in pain. Jericho quickly sends some kicks into the Big Show’s right leg until he successfully sends him to both knees. Jericho applies a rear chin lock, applying as much pressure as he can against The Big Show’s impressive size. Jericho immediately yells to the ref “HE’S OUT! RING THE BELL! IT’S OVER!”.

Much to Jericho’s chagrin, The Big Show’s actions send a different message. He fights through the pain shooting through his legs and rises to his feet. The tenacious Jericho stays locked on his back, wrapping his legs around as much of The Big Show’s midsection as he can. This proves to be a mistake as The Big Show grabs Jericho’s legs and sends all of his weight crashing backwards onto him.

The Big Show takes a moment, grabbing on to the ropes for support as he shakes some of the sting out of his legs. Jericho writhes on the ground in such pain that his dissenters might even pity him for a second. The Big Show briefly admires his handy work before forcing Jericho to his feet. He reels back his sends a crushing fist into Jericho’s midsection. Jericho doubles over in pain. The Big Show reels back again, unleashing another devastating blow to Jericho’s midsection. Jericho clutches his stomach and falls forward, sliding down the Big Show and landing in a quivering mass at his feet.

The Big Show holds his hands above his head in triumph, and the crowd shows him their appreciation. The Big Show pulls Jericho to his feet and Irish whips him into a corner. He shushes the crowd and sends a thunderous clap down onto Jericho’s chest, which echoes throughout the arena. The crowd begins to chant “ONE MORE!”, and The Big Show is happy to oblige. He shushes them again and winds his hand back to attempt another chest slap…

The next moments come quickly. As The Big Show winds his hand back, Batista emerges from underneath the ring. He has a steel folding chair in his hand. Batista jumps up onto the apron just as the crowd quiets for the Big Show and sends a much more sickening echo throughout the arena as he clocks The Big Show’s head with the chair. The chair dents and The Big Show’s forehead begins trickling blood as he falls to the canvass, out cold.

Batista crawls into the ring and surveys the damage. The felled Big Show is lifeless on the mat. The injured Jericho is clutching his chest and staring upwards at him as if all of his prayers have just been answered. Batista winks and shoots Jericho a finger gun before nodding his head towards The Big Show. Jericho crawls over on top of the Big Show while Batista exits the ring and heads back up the ramp. The referee slaps the mat three times, and Chris Jericho earns his way into the Graduation main event.

Chris Jericho via pinfall

EMTs rush to the ring to attend to the Big Show. Chris Jericho steps around them as he celebrates, still clutching his midsection. The crowd is lively in its disapproval.

**

Backstage, we find Christy Hemme in her cheerleader outfit. She stares quizzically at a vending machine, tapping a thoughtful finger to her chin. A sheepish Evan Bourne approaches her, and she smiles as she notices him.

CHRISTY: Hey Evan! How are you?

BOURNE: Hey Christy…I’m OK…a little banged up from that beating Punk laid on me last week, but I’ll live.

CHRISTY: You poor thing. (smiling seductively) Is there anything I can do to help you?

BOURNE: (not entirely picking up on her signal) No, it’s OK…I was actually just coming over here to say thanks for showing some concern for me last week. I know The Miz pulled you away, so I hope you didn’t get in trouble with your boyfriend or anything…but that was just a really nice gesture, so I thought I’d show some appreciation in return.

Evan reaches off camera and produces a dozen red roses. Christy graciously accepts them.

CHRISTY: Oh my god, Evan! You are too sweet!

Christy moves in and hugs Bourne. It catches him off guard at first, but he soon returns the embrace. Christy really seems to be enjoying herself until The Miz, Alex Riley, and Chris Masters (collectively known as Team Awesome) appear, all wearing street clothes under their lettermen’s jackets. They do NOT look happy. Christy quickly releases the hug and holds the flowers behind her back.

THE MIZ: What the hell is going on here, Christy? Team Awesome is placed in DETENTION, and you’re over here fraternizing with the biggest dweeb the wrestling world has ever seen?

CHRISTY: I was just looking for something to drink, and he came up and said hello. It’s not a big deal.

The Miz reaches around Christy and snatches the roses out of her hand. He turns to Riley and Masters with an incredulous look on his face. They both shake their heads in disgust. The Miz turns his attention to Evan Bourne

THE MIZ: Flowers? You’re buying my girl FLOWERS? What a hack move. Have you ever even kissed a real live woman?

BOURNE: I really don’t think that what I do in my private life is any of your business.

THE MIZ: Oh, I know that! Nothing you do in your professional life is any of my business either. You know why? Because you’re a NOBODY around here. Nobody cares about you, and nobody ever will. I’m not even going to get mad at you for hitting on Christy, because you are absolutely insignificant to Team Awesome’s master plan. You see, once this whole ridiculous detention thing is over next week, I’m going to start making my strides to the Hard Knocks Wrestling heavyweight title…and as long as A-Ri and The Masterpiece have my back, there’s not going to be anything that YOU or anyone else around here is going to be able to do to stop me.

Evan Bourne rolls his eyes.

BOURNE: Whatever, man. You can call me insignificant all you want, but as it stands right now…I’m booked for a match tonight, and you…(Evan looks the three men up and down before snickering)…you’re just three grown men serving a detention. I’ll catch you later, Christy.

Evan Bourne goes about his way. The Miz tosses the roses in the same direction before turning to Christy Hemme with a scowl. Christy shrugs as we cut to commercial.

***COMMERCIAL***

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Ric Flair makes his way to the ring wearing a suit. He doesn’t waste much time with fanfare as he storms to the ring. He is handed a microphone as he gets in the ring.

FLAIR: CM PUNK! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE, RIGHT NOW!

Not much time passes as CM Punk’s theme song hits and he appears at the top of the entrance with a microphone. He starts to take a couple steps towards the ring, but pauses, noting Flair’s demeanor. He opts to take care of tonight’s business from the top of the entrance.

PUNK: I know you’re crazy Ric, but I’m about the last person you want to be call—

FLAIR: SHUT UP! Just please, SHUT…UP! All you kids do today is talk and talk. That’s ALL you do! I am an ICON in this industry, and now you’re going to listen to what I have to say! Now, last week, you told me that I was the most vile and despicable specimen to ever lace a pair of boots. You seem to have a problem with the fact that everyone in this building respects me for what I’ve done, and for what I CONTINUE to do to this day.

PUNK: That’s right, Flair. You’re a cancer to this industry. It’s time for you to hang it up for good, and—

FLAIR: AND WHAT, PUNK? And what? YOU think that you’re going to be the man to actually get me to do it? Listen here, junior…I’ve seen punks like you come, and I’ve seen them go. They all say the same thing. They all say I’m hogging the spotlight. They all say I’m cancerous to this profession, and they all think that they can beat THE MAN. Well you know what I think about that, Punk? I think that your actions last week are more cancerous to the industry than anything I’ve ever done in my career! You think you’re so great? You think your generation’s talent is so great? When you started choking a guy like Evan Bourne…a guy who IS great, and a guy who CAN be the future of this industry…you were definitely doing more harm than good. I’m not here to hold anybody down. I’m not here to steal anybody’s shine…but what I AM here to do is to make sure that the RIGHT people of today’s generation are the ones that carry us into the future…people like Evan Bourne…not tattooed blowhards like yourself.

PUNK: You’re so senile, you don’t even know what’s good f—

FLAIR: SHUT UP! I’m not finished! I’m going to save you the trouble of the old song and dance, because I know EXACTLY what you want from me! You want a fight! But not only do you want a fight, you want to put my career on the line! And you know what, Punk? That’s fine! This happens to me ALL the time, and I’m still standing RIGHT HERE! See Punk, it’s guys like YOU that are holding themselves down, and that’s one thing…but when you’re trying to hold your own generation down, you are the doing more damage than I ever could. That’s why I want to nip YOU in the bud. How about this…at Graduation, Ric Flair versus CM Punk. If you win, I’ll retire for good…but if I win…YOU retire!

PUNK: WHAT? That’s ridiculous! I’m not putting my career on the line against a has-been like you! I have too much to contribute still!

FLAIR: Fine. Have it your way…but Ric Flair ain’t goin’ ANYWHERE! WOOOOOOOOO!

The crowd responds with a ‘WOOOOOO!’, which frustrates Punk. Flair woos again, and the crowd returns it again. Flair continues to ‘WOOOOOO!’, and the crowd continues to ‘WOOOOOO!’ back repeatedly until Punk becomes enraged, tearing at his hair.

PUNK: STOP IT WITH THE WOOING! STOP IT! NO MORE! RIC FLAIR! YOU’RE ON FOR GRADUATION! I ACCEPT!

Flair stops wooing and casts a sinister smile in Punk’s direction. Punk stares back at him with hatred in his eyes.

***COMMERCIAL***

EVAN BOURNE v. PAUL BURCHILL

Paul Burchill starts the match off looking pretty sharp, looking to capitalize on Bourne’s state after the brutal attack from CM Punk last week. Burchill keeps Evan grounded after a hard slam, using his size advantage. Burchill locks Bourne in a leg scissor around his midsection.

Bourne is clearly in pain, but he claps his hands to get the crowd to rally behind him. They happily do, and he feeds off of their support. Bourne manages to wiggle his way to the ropes, and the referee forces Burchill to break the hold. Evan uses the ropes to get to his feet. Burchill comes charging at him, but Bourne catches him with a drop toe hold, causing Burchill to land neck first, sprawled across the second rope. He stays in that position as Bourne bolts towards the opposite ropes. As he comes back, he springboards off of Burchill’s back and jumps, twisting in the air to place a leg drop across the back of Burchill’s neck. The impact slings Burchill backwards to the middle of the ring as Bourne lands safely on the apron. Bourne gets to his feet and springboards off the middle of the top rope, launching himself into the ring and rotating backwards in a beautiful shooting star press which lands flush. Bourne hooks both legs as the referee slaps the three count.

WINNER: Evan Bourne via pinfall

Bourne climbs all four corners, appealing to the crowd as he celebrates his victory. One fan in particular appears at the top of the entrance. You may recognize her as Christy Hemme. She smiles huge and applauds vigorously. Evan notices her and smiles, flashing her a peace sign.

Matt Striker stands from the announce position with a house microphone.

STRIKER: Congratulations on an impressive victory, Evan. I don’t mean to take away from your celebration, but I’ve got some law to lay down. Since the rules of detention state that NO member of Team Awesome is allowed to set foot in the ring area today…yes, that includes you, Christy…and they are CLEARLY in violation…ALL members of Team Awesome are hereby BANNED from title contention of ANY kind, INDEFINITELY!

Christy covers her mouth with her hands, realizing she has made a pretty major mistake. Evan Bourne chuckles and shrugs at Christy, mouthing the word ‘sorry’.

We cut backstage and find The Miz in a fit of rage in the dressing room. He flips over a table before picking up a metal folding chair and slamming it repeatedly against the lockers. Alex Riley and Chris Masters rush to his side to try and calm him down, but he pushes them away and lets out an angry scream.

***COMMERCIAL***

KURT ANGLE v. JACK SWAGGER (WINNER FACES CHRIS JERICHO FOR THE HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE AT GRADUATION)

Both men are intense during their entrances. Mick Foley gives a nod to Swagger’s intestinal fortitude for even competing in this match with a broken nose. The referee signals for the bell, and they meet face to face in the middle of the ring. Swagger taps his face protector as he jaws at Kurt about being a cheater. Swagger shoves Kurt, stumbling him back a few steps. Angle retaliates by shooting on Jack’s legs, wrestling him down to the mat. They roll around on the canvass for a bit, exchanging glancing blows before they break the plane of the bottom rope, causing the referee to stand them back up.

Swagger starts jawing at Kurt again, but he stops midsentence and ducks behind Kurt, locking his hands around his waist. Swagger picks Angle up and uses his leg to sweep Kurt’s feet out from under him as he slams him face first into the mat. Swagger floats around Angle’s back and applies a front face lock. Swagger tightens his grip and starts rolling around the ring while keeping his grip to apply extra pressure to the hold. In an arrogant move, Swagger suddenly releases the hold, slapping the back of Kurt’s head a few times before getting back to his feet and encouraging Angle to do the same.

Angle massages his neck as he slowly gets to his feet, giving Swagger a look as if he has maybe underestimated him a bit. The look slowly dissolves into a smile as Angle signals for Swagger to bring it on.

Swagger obliges and lunges in for a grapple. Kurt quickly drops to one knee and grabs Swagger’s leg. Kurt flips Swagger over his head and to the mat and smoothly transitions into a rear chin lock. Kurt keeps the hold locked in with one arm as he repeatedly slaps The All-American American’s face guard with his free hand. Kurt then releases the hold with no prompting before returning to his feet and encouraging Swagger to do the same. Swagger grabs his face in pain before jumping to his feet and yelling at the ref to tell Angle to stop cheating. The referee rolls his eyes as Swagger turns his attention back to the Olympic gold medalist.

Swagger and Angle circle each other before engaging in a collar and elbow tie up. Swagger uses his strength to muscle Kurt into a corner. The referee calls for a break, and Swagger does… but he immediately thrusts a shoulder into Kurt’s midsection, using the ropes to help drive him forward. Swagger sends a bruising knee into Angle’s stomach before grapping his head and snapmaring Kurt to the canvass. Swagger drives his knee into Angle’s spine, and the pain shows on Angle’s face. He repeats the knee before shoving Kurt’s shoulders to the mat and making a quick cover. Angle kicks out at one and a half.

Swagger picks Angle back up to his feet and connects with some stiff forearm shots to his head. He sends Angle into the ropes with an Irish whip and lowers his head for a backdrop. Angle picks up on the anticipation and sunset flips over Swagger. Instead of trying to pull him down for a pin though, he repositions himself and snatches Swagger’s ankle out from under him. Swagger falls face first to the canvass, and Kurt locks in a standing ankle lock. Swagger screams out in pain before pushing himself up on his hands and using his other leg to dive towards a bottom rope. He makes it, and holds on to the rope for dear life as the referee calls for Angle to break the hold.

Swagger pulls himself to his feet and begins to circle Angle again. Angle goes to shoot for a takedown, but Swagger catches him with a boot to the stomach. Swagger comes down across Angle’s back with multiple clubbing forearms. Swagger picks Angle up and slams him hard to the mat with a scoop slam. Swagger looks to follow with an elbow drop, but Angle rolls out of the way. Angle gets to his feet and grabs both of Swagger’s legs, flipping over him in a pinning combination. Swagger kicks out at two.

Both men return to their feet with neither having gained a clear cut advantage yet. Swagger smiles at Kurt before dropping down to all fours in a popular amateur wrestling starting position. He urges Kurt to start in the advantageous position. Angle is agitated, but he agrees. Angle walks over to Swagger, but instead of positioning himself on top, he quickly rolls Swagger up in a mahistrol cradle into a pin. Swagger kicks out at two and a half. Swagger slaps the mat, screaming “THAT’S NOT HOW THAT WORKS!” at Kurt. Kurt shrugs before saying “show me” and dropping down to all fours himself. Swagger rolls his eyes, but agrees. Swagger walks over to Angle, but instead of positioning himself on top, he cocks back and explodes a vicious kick into Kurt’s ribs.

Angle rolls around on the ground in pain as Swagger stomps on his ribs a few more times for good measure. Swagger pulls Angle to his feet. He takes the back of Angle’s tights in one hand and the back of his head in the other. Exhibiting some fairly impressive strength, he tosses Kurt, sliding him across the mat and underneath the bottom ropes. Kurt’s ribs slam into the ring post. Swagger wastes no time in hopping outside the ring and going to the opposite side of the ring post while Kurt lies in the ring writhing in pain. Swagger grabs underneath Angle’s chin with one hand and Angle’s foot with the other. Using his own leg as leverage on the ring post, Swagger tries his best to try and bend Kurt Angle around the ringpost. Kurt yells out in pain as the referee shouts at Swagger to get back in the ring. Feeling he has done a substantial amount of damage, Swagger takes the ref’s advice and re-enters the ring.

Swagger brings Kurt to his feet and sets him up for a vertical suplex. It lands beautifully. Matt Striker comments on how Swagger appears to be setting Angle up for his Gutwrench Powerbomb. Swagger sits Kurt up to a seated position. Swagger places his knee into Kurt’s back, pulling Kurt’s arm behind him for some serious pressure. Pain is etched on Angle’s face, but he yells “NO!” every time the referee asks him if he would like to submit.

Swagger keeps the hold locked in for a bit before letting go on his own terms. Swagger drags Angle to his feet before Irish whipping him into the ropes. Upon Angle’s return, Swagger manages to catch him in an overhead belly to belly suplex. Unfortunately for Kurt, he lands awkwardly in the ropes, with his neck tied up between the second and bottom ropes and his feet dangling just above the ground on the outside. Kurt panics a bit as he begins to choke, but he manages to sit on the apron to stop some pressure. The move still does not get his neck from out of the ropes. Striker mentions Kurt’s past problems as the referee rushes over to try and get him free. Swagger does some jumping jacks in the ring before tearing his singlet straps down and yelling, mocking Kurt Angle. Swagger walks over and yells in Kurt’s face that he’s going to beat him “with a broken freakin’ nose!” as the referee continues to try and help Angle escape the ropes.

***COMMERCIAL***

It’s still all Swagger when we return. He has Angle locked in an abdominal stretch. As the referee gets in Kurt’s face to ask if he submits, Swagger uses his reach to grab the top rope for added leverage. He releases the rope as the referee returns to position, not suspecting a thing. Swagger takes his free arm and fires some forearms into Kurt’s ribs before wrenching back even harder on the hold. The referee checks on Kurt again, and Swagger grabs the rope. The referee notices this time and shouts at Swagger to break the hold. Before Swagger gets a chance to react, Angle lowers his center of gravity enough to be able to hip toss Swagger off of him and to the mat.

Swagger gets back to his feet as Angle tries to take a moment to recuperate. Swagger charges at Angle to try and minimize that time, but Angle is enough about his wits to duck down and toss Swagger over his head, over the top rope, and onto the floor out the outside with a back body drop. Angle collapses to his knees, clutching his ribs. Swagger is confused and hurt on the outside. The referee begins to count Swagger out. He gets all the way up to seven before Kurt makes his way to his feet and goes out after Swagger.

Angle snatches Swagger up off the floor and slams his head into the ring apron. He does this two more times before grabbing Swagger’s arm and Irish whipping him into the fan barricade. Angle mounts the fallen Swagger and rains down some punches into his forehead as the referee pleads for them to get back in the ring. Angle picks Swagger up and guides him back over to the ring, rolling him in under the bottom rope. Kurt gets in the ring himself as well, pulling down his singlet straps and releasing a yell. Kurt urges Swagger to get to his feet as he waits to attack. Swagger uses the ropes to pull himself up and stumbles towards Kurt. Angle goes behind Swagger , picking him up for an attempted Angle Slam…but his ribs are too injured to hoist Jack over. Kurt drops Swagger mid move and doubles over in pain, clutching his ribs. Swagger is winded, but he smiles as he realizes his earlier strategy paying off now.

Swagger’s smile gets even bigger as he notices that Kurt is in perfect position for a Gutwrench Powerbomb. Swagger quickly grabs Angle around the waist and hoists him up into the air. However, Angle twists his body and slides down Swagger’s back, landing behind him. Angle quickly snatches Swagger’s leg and with his hands and trips him face first to the mat with his other leg, keeping his grip. Swagger’s face becomes one of panic as Angle locks in a standing ankle lock. Swagger begins to make some moves towards the ropes to break the hold, but Angle wraps his legs around the targeted ankle lock leg and falls to the mat himself, stopping Swagger from moving. Swagger has no choice but to tap out.

WINNER: Kurt Angle via submission

Kurt’s theme music hits the PA as he celebrates his retained Graduation title shot with the fans. Chris Jericho and Batista appear at the top of the entrance. Jericho smiles at Kurt and Batista stands behind him menacingly with his arms folded across his chest. Kurt motions for them to ‘bring it on’, but they maintain their positions at the top of the ramp. Kurt drops to his knees and raises his hands in the air as red, white, and blue pyrotechnics explode above the ring.

***CREDITS***

[XL]

NEW AGE PRO WRESTLING


We start with a recap of last week. Some quick clips showing us who is closer to the NAPW World Tag Team Championship (The Hart Dynasty) and who is closer to the NAPW World Heavyweight Championship (Jay Lethal, Eddie Colon, Yoshi Tatsu and John Morrison). We then get the NAPW intro video, and here we go:

Stay tuned: Tonight we have the debut of The Young Bucks against Paul London & Brian Kendrick, as well as the singles debuts of William Regal, MVP, Santino Marella, Justin Gabriel & Kiyoshi Raijin. Rey Mysterio will also call out his assailant from last week.

Opening Contest: Jay Lethal (1-0) vs. Eddie Colon (1-0)

The NAPW commentary team of Timmy McNulty and Noah Mercy inform us that one man will really solidify themselves as a presence here in NAPW with this match. The two shake hands before the match, as they seem to have a great deal of respect for each other. Timmy McNulty informs us that Eddie was a bit weirded out, since he’s not used to being older than his opponents (Eddie is 27, and Lethal is 25).

Eddie starts out with the advantage, getting a back heel trip into an armbar variant. Mercy tips the scales in favour of Colon, due to his upbringing in professional wrestling, and having more experience over the naturally talented Lethal. Colon manages to score a fireman’s carry takedown on Lethal, and continues to work over the arm with a top wristlock. Mercy gives the submission advantage to Colon, which makes this smart strategy by Colon. Lethal manages to back Colon, who has control of Lethal’s arm into the corner. The referee forces a break, and Lethal goes to knife-edge chop Colon, but Eddie ducks and nails Lethal with a knife-edge chop of his own, followed by a snapmare and a dropkick to the back of the head for a quick two count. Colon again goes to the arm, this time with a hammerlock, but Lethal manages to get some momentum behind him, and manages to slide Colon out of the ring. Lethal manages to dive between the top and middle ropes, and nails The Artist Formerly Known as Primo with a Flying DDT!

Lethal rolls Eddie back into the ring, but only scores a two count. Lethal has the advantage now, and works over the head and neck area of Eddie Colon, and Noah Mercy brings up that a lot of Lethal’s signature maneuvers favour this area of the body. Lethal manages to hit his back suplex into a neckbreaker move for a two count. Lethal also gets his EnziFury for a two count. Lethal manages to get a bridging wheelbarrow suplex on Eddie for a two count. Timmy NcNulty asks just what Lethal has to do to put Eddie Colon away. Lethal goes for his Dragon Overhead Suplex, but Eddie flips over and lands on his feet. Eddie scores a series of dropkicks, and then hits a leg sweep into a leg drop. Eddie scores with his new rolling jawbreaker-move, where he hits a jawbreaker, followed by another one, with the third one involving him swinging his leg out into a sit-out version of the maneuver. Eddie goes up for the Cannonball Twister, but Lethal avoids the move. Eddie blocks a clothesline attempt, and he turns the move into a neckbreaker, which he rolls into a swinging neckbreaker, which only gets two. Eddie is looking for a Backstabber, but Lethal holds onto the ropes, and flings Eddie with extra force off the move. Lethal then goes up top, as if going for a moonsault, but Eddie catches him up top. Spider superplex (think German superplex with Eddie remaining attached to the top rope as if in a tree of woe) by Eddie to Lethal! Eddie repositions him on the top rope as the referee is checking to see if Lethal is alright, and Homicide is on the scene, and shoves Eddie Colon off the top rope! Eddie hangs himself up on the top rope (reminiscent of how he beat Joey Mercury last week), and Lethal is recovering, and has no clue Homicide (who he defeated last week) has helped him. Lethal nails his Lethal Combination (back heel trip into a backbreaker rolled into a flatliner) and scores the three on Eddie.

Result: Jay Lethal (2-0) defeats Eddie Colon (1-1) via pinfall after a Lethal Combination.

Noah Mercy gets in the ring after the match and asks Lethal how he feels about his win. Lethal says it feels great to be closer to the NAPW World Heavyweight Championship. Mercy shows Lethal how he won the match. Lethal doesn’t look happy, but he says that he will take whatever wins he can get, because he has the opportunity to be a World Heavyweight Champion at 25 years old.

Santino Marella is with John Morrison backstage. Santino says he is going to try and be serious for a moment, as last week; Morrison scored a huge victory over Rey Mysterio in the main event, and got closer to the NAPW World Heavyweight Championship...which will be won by Santino Marella. But we also saw a masked figure attack Rey Mysterio last week. Santino’s question for Morrison: Does Morrison’s psychic powers allow him to know the identity of the attacker, and also, why didn’t he help Rey Mysterio?

John Morrison: “First of all, I do not have psychic powers, Santino; I am just a heightened being of enlightenment. Second of all, I respect Rey Mysterio. Why do I respect a man who obviously isn’t nearly as handsome as John Morrison? Because no man is as handsome as John Morrison, and regardless, Mysterio has earned respect because for 18 years, Mysterio has been proving everybody wrong. He’s been a two-time World Heavyweight Champion, he’s made millions of dollars in merchandising and endorsements; not that the superficial matters to John Morrison. Rey Mysterio has proved time and time again that he doesn’t need people to fight his battles for him; and if he does, well, Rey won’t get any stronger if people pick him out of the dirt his own status as a superficial pop-culture icon has buried him in. Rey Mysterio’s fights are Rey Mysterio’s fights.

Now let’s talk about me. Last week I beat Rey Mysterio in the first-ever NAPW main event, and moved myself closer to becoming the first-ever NAPW World Heavyweight Champion. Now, I don’t want to be NAPW World Heavyweight Champion because of the big shiny belt I will get at the end.

John Morrison is beyond material realms such as that. I want to be the NAPW World Heavyweight Champion so I can further my eternal legacy; and create the legacy of New Age Professional Wrestling.”

Santino Marella asks Morrison to repeat that. He was thinking about Tilda Swinton. Morrison tells Santino to forget it, but before walking off tells Santino to make sure he beats Justin Gabriel tonight. That company-wrecker needs to take a back-seat in NAPW. Santino: “Oh crap, that’s happening tonight.”

*Commercial break*

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When we return, MVP is out for his match against William Regal. Both men are making their NAPW debuts tonight. MVP gets on the mic before we begin:

MVP: “Look, I’m a fun guy. But I have a real investment in NAPW. I was the highest paid athlete in WWE SmackDown! history at one point, and I put a lot of that money aside and all of this is what I have created as a testament to the sport that gave me my fancy clothes, my fast cars and my even faster women. As someone who owes my life to this sport, I am offended that Homicide is coming into NAPW like he owns the place. Look, you are a superbly talented man, Homicide. That is why you have a place here in NAPW. But you lost to Jay Lethal last week, and for some reason you’ve chosen to take it out on Eddie Colon, and hampered his chances at becoming the NAPW World Heavyweight Champion.

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Homicide is out.

Homicide: “Look, MVP. Basically, it goes like this: Jay Lethal got lucky against me, so I want him to be the NAPW World Heavyweight Champion. Anyone who beats me deserves to be the World Champ. But it made it so much easier that it was against that little cunt, Eddie Colon. I’m so fucking sick of second generation assholes like him coming into my business, waltzing in on daddy’s ticket. The man is treated like royalty in Puerto Rico, whereas a guy like me has to work hard every day of his life to get ahead. And I know whose side you’re going to take. You’re going to keep Daddy Colon happy, please your investors, et cetera. A guy like me isn’t exactly consumer-friendly. But I’m here for one reason and one reason only. Do what I do best, and do it better than anyone else. And you should be the one guy here who knows where I’m coming from with that.”

MVP: “I do know what you mean, playa. I was in prison for nine years and thought life not even worth living. I stayed alive because it was my animal instinct to do so. Then I found this job and I worked out that I am very good at this. I believe we are very similar in these regards. But in finding something I am good at, I became mature and I grew away from the thug life, Homie.” Homicide interjects and tells him not to call him that. “I grew outwards, and I’ve saved my money and I’ve created this. What have you created, bitch?” Homicide looks like he is about to snap at that. MVP tells Homicide that if he does such a thing, he’ll fire him on the spot. Why? Because he’s the boss, he’s earned this station in life, and he tells Homicide to get to the back like a good bitch. Homicide is obviously not going to go, and the fans want to see these two go at it.

Eddie Colon interrupts now. Eddie says that this is the biggest load of crap he has heard in his life. Yeah, Eddie’s dad is a former World Heavyweight Champion; but when Eddie shows up to work in a new promotion, there is a locker-room full of guys who walk up to him and tell him “prove it.” He does. Everywhere he goes. Eddie says that he truly believes he would have beaten Jay Lethal tonight if it weren’t for Homicide, and he wants a chance to prove that he can beat Homicide even quicker than Lethal did last week (Lethal and Homicide had an 8 minute match last week, just for clarification). Homicide tells Eddie to try it right now. I can’t touch MVP, since he’s a cowardly motherfucker hiding behind the system, but he can beat the living shit out of bitch-ass Primo any day. Eddie looks glad the match is on, and like he wants to absolute kill Homicide.

MVP tells them that the match is on, but Homicide will forfeit to “bitch-ass Primo” if he doesn’t get out of this ring right now. Homicide finally obliges after making a bit of a show about it. It is now time for an actual wrestling match. But MVP tells us we’re going to take another commercial break, because that shit just went on too long and he needs to get his head straight.

*Commercial break*

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William Regal makes his way out to the ring, as Noah Mercy hypes Regal as a man who has mentored guys like Triple H, CM Punk and Bryan Danielson, and essentially got fired from WCW for beating up their top investment. He says that although they share cultural divides, the attitudes towards this business almost seem shared between William Regal and Homicide, who regard each other as Regal makes his way to the ring, again shaking his head at Homicide’s “street” image.

Regal grabs a mic as he gets in the ring: “Montel, Montel, Montel...week two and the ship is already falling apart, sunshine. You have young master Homicide in your face, you have Edward Colon (pronounced as the part of the anatomy by Regal) getting air-time before I do, you have masked figures attacking esteemed performers, and you have the Japanese guys all banding together to cost men who should be your top stars their matches. If he were running NAPW, this wouldn’t be happening.” MVP is just shrugging and wants to do this match. Regal says that he should overturn control of the company over to him, and see how things fall into place.

Match Two: MVP (0-0) vs. William Regal (0-0)

MVP starts by slugging Regal and getting a one count off it. Regal is pissed by that, and charges in, but gets a headlock takeover, and MVP is in control. Regal gets to the ropes, but MVP lays some hard strikes into Regal, who demands that MVP should be disqualified for that. The referee informs Regal that MVP had until five. Noah Mercy calls Regal a genius for trying to get a win anyway he can, because a win here gets him closer to the NAPW World Heavyweight Championship, and MVP further away. He says that Regal is the most underrated performer in the world today.

Regal manages to wrestle MVP to the ground in round two, and is working over the legs of MVP. Regal is yelling stuff at MVP like “You can’t wrestle me!” to try and goad MVP into playing his game. MVP’s pride does get in the way, and he tries to fight Regal on the mat, which doesn’t go well for MVP. Eventually, MVP manages to get Regal in position for something like a backslide, but he flips Regal over so he lands on his feet, and turns that into a short-arm knee strike, which he follows up with an exploder suplex. Out of nowhere, MVP is back into things. MVP whips Regal into the corner and goes for his player boot (running big boot), but Regal dodges and MVP kicks the corner, and Regal chop blocks the sore leg of MVP.

Regal’s offence targets the leg, and he gets MVP in a grapevine leg lock in the middle of the ring. MVP manages to get to the ropes, however, and Regal holds the move in for as long as he can. When the referee gets Regal off Porter, Regal screams at the ref “I’ve got until five!” Regal goes for the Regal Stretch in the middle of the ring, but MVP manages to fight out of it, and gets some sharp kicks to Regal’s head while they are on the ground. MVP then manages to get back to his feet, as Regal is still on his knees, and nails Regal with a Drive-By! 1-2-Regal kicks out! MVP goes for The Playmaker, but Regal just swipes at the hurt leg, and MVP collapses on top of his head. Exploder suplex by Regal only gets two. Timmy McNulty remarks that we have seen an exploder suplex from both Regal and MVP in this match, and that there is truly something elite shared between them. Regal again goes for the Regal Stretch, but MVP manages to turn it into a version of the Crippler Crossface he calls, To The Bank, for the submission victory, and the first in NAPW history.

Result: MVP (1-0) defeats William Regal (0-1) via submission with a To The Bank.

Noah Mercy is on the scene and asks MVP how it feels to be closer to being the first NAPW World Heavyweight Champion. MVP says that his business partner is handling the belt creation, so that he can be just as surprised as anyone when the NAPW World Heavyweight Championship is first presented to whoever earns it – hopefully it will be him. MVP puts over William Regal as a vicious performer who is definitely worthy of the NAPW roster. MVP then tells us we’ll be going to a commercial break now, but when we come back, we’ll have Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. The Young Bucks. Stay tuned! Timmy NcNulty puts over MVP for having the energy to shill his own product after a ferocious battle with William Regal.

*Commercial break*

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The tag team legend which needs no tag team name make their way to the ring!

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The Young Bucks make their...eccentric entrance to the ring.

Match Three: Paul London & Brian Kendrick (0-0) vs. The Young Bucks (0-0)

Noah Mercy says that the somewhat innocent vibe The Young Bucks give off here won’t really throw London & Kendrick, because these teams in the tag team division have been studying each other so carefully. Mercy puts over the science of tag team wrestling, since a tag team wrestler needs to not only know one opponent; but two – as well as their own partner.

Brian Kendrick is starting off against Matt Jackson, who is four years older than his brother, Nick. Kendrick goes for a wristlock, but Matt flips over and lands on his feet and then gets Kendrick in a wristlock. Kendrick manages to arm drag out of it and Matt is quick to his feet, but Kendrick stops him and offers him a hand. Jackson accepts, and Kendrick knees Jackson in the gut and then hits a quick leg lariat. Kendrick tosses Matt to his corner and tells Nick to tag in. A pissed off Nick does, and slingshots into the ring and charges at Kendrick, but London has hit a springboard crossbody in over Kendrick onto Nick Jackson! Kendrick makes the cover, which only gets two. Kendrick tosses Nick Jackson into their home corner, and he and London hit their arm-wringer double axe handle combos out of their corner. Kendrick turns a second arm-wringer from him into Dr. Teeth (basically smashing Nick Jackson’s face onto his knee, and holds Jackson in place while London tags in and hits a mushroom stomp to Jackson’s back. London covers and only gets two. He applies the headscissors to Jackson, and is looking for a submission victory, as Noah Mercy puts over that it is great strategy for the more experience and arguably better mat-workers, London & Kendrick, to ground their high-energy opponents.

Nick Jackson manages to flip-out out of the headscissors in an impressive spot, but as he runs the ropes, London kips up and shoulder blocks Nick down. London yells at Matt: “You’re not as good as us!” London runs the ropes and Nick Jackson kips up, but London stops and nails Jackson with a roundhouse kick.

London & Kendrick keep the pressure on The Young Bucks, using their experience to keep them on the mat. During this beat-down, they showed some other teams watching this beat-down in the back. They showed The Hart Dynasty, The Long Island Inception and even Yoshi Tatsu & Kiyoshi Raijin, who had someone with them. Noah Mercy said that it was Funaki, but Timmy NcNulty doubted it very much.

Eventually, Nick got the tag to Matt Jackson, who got some high-flying offence in on London & Kendrick. He even managed to hit a Worst Case Scenario on Paul London (sort of a reverse version of Amazing Red’s “Code Red” – Jackson got London with a body scissors, and spun forward flipping London onto his face/chest). Brian Kendrick broke this up for two. A double superkick from Londrick on Matt Jackson was saved by Nick Jackson. London went for a 450 Splash on Matt Jackson, but Matt rolled out of the way and London got nothing but canvas. Nick Jackson then hit a 450 Splash of his own on London, but Brian Kendrick broke up the pin. This was followed up by Kendrick getting in position for Sliced Bread #2 on Nick Jackson, and kicking Matt Jackson with Dr. Smoothe’s Secret Recipe while hitting Nick with his finisher. Matt managed to find a sudden spurt of energy to break up that pin. Matt powerbombed Brian Kendrick into the knees of Nick Jackson who was on the top rope. Paul London then crotched Nick on top and hit a slingshot dropkick on Matt, and then hit a hurricanrana on Nick Jackson, who landed on his brother. Matt kicked out a two count. London got Nick Jackson in position for a wheelbarrow suplex, and Kendrick ran in with a knee lift on Jackson, flowing him into a bridging wheelbarrow suplex, but that only got two, as well. Londrick went for Get Well Soon on both of The Bucks, but they were avoiding that like the plague. The two teams fought until the bell sounded out of the blue. NAPW ring announcer, Omar King, announced that the match was declared a twenty-minute time limit draw.

Result: Paul London & Brian Kendrick (0-0-1) draw with The Young Bucks (0-0-1) due to the time limit expiring.

The fans were chanting “five more mintues!” and The Bucks looked keen to give it to them. Paul London & Brian Kendrick stood in their corner, but then slid out of the ring. They were pointing to the heads as they walked to the back saying that they were “smarter than that.”

Noah Mercy asks what The Young Bucks think about this. Matt Jackson says that they just proved that they are good enough to hang with one of the longest reigning sets of Tag Team Champions of all-time, and have enough air left in their lungs to challenge them to a rematch next week. Nick Jackson says that it is an honour to be competing in NAPW, and the World Tag Team Championship will soon be theirs, because they just proved that they are that good, and these people can back them up. The crowd seems to be behind The Young Bucks. Noah Mercy says that as both a color commentator and a wrestling fan, he wants to see these teams go at it again in the near future.

*Commercial break*

We return with Santino Marella interviewing Yoshi Tatsu & Kiyoshi Raijin, who introduce their new manager – Shoichi Funaki. “I told you it was Funaki!” – Noah Mercy. Funaki says that he was at one stage one of the rising stars in Japan, and was feared for his deadly abilities. American culture turned him into a joke. He won’t let the same thing happen to such amazing young talents as Yoshi Tatsu – “The Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim” – and Kiyoshi Raijin – “The Rising Dragon.” One of these men will be the future NAPW World Heavyweight Champion – something Funaki can not do, because so many of his career years were spent being treated as a comedy figure. Santino Marella tells Funaki that it must suck being treated as a comedy figure. He now has to go and prepare for his very serious match against Justin Gabriel.

Sheamus vs. Kiyoshi Raijin will take place tonight. Yoshi Tatsu is banned from ringside. John Morrison will be facing the debuting Jimmy Yang, with either Morrison going 2-0 and being up there with Jay Lethal, or Yang getting the huge victory over Morrison and making a name for himself in his NAPW debut.

Backstage, William Regal approaches Sheamus. Regal tells Sheamus that he hopes he was listening to him earlier, and that Sheamus shouldn’t take on these puroresu guys alone. Sheamus says that he is a warrior, and warriors don’t always pick their battles. Regal says that Sheamus has got so much potential, and Regal can help him find it. Sheamus asks Regal what he means by that? Sheamus says that he is a former two-time World Heavyweight Champion. Sheamus says that he did in less than a year what William Regal hasn’t done in nearly 30. Sheamus tells Regal to get out of his face, and storms off, as Regal looks offended.

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The Milan Miracle has been training and ready to take on a man believed to be a big reason to be the fall of the WWE...now!

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Justin Gabriel comes out to the theme song from No Way Out 2001, looking particularly focused. Gabriel has reportedly released a statement he wants Timmy McNulty to read to people: “He is not in NAPW to cause controversy or sink this company. His one goal is to compete, and do so effectively.”

[XL]

Match Four: Santino Marella (0-0) vs. “The Black Angel” Justin Gabriel (0-0)
Justin Gabriel offers Santino his hand, but Marella refuses to accept. Justin Gabriel seems to understand, and then collar-and-elbow tie-ups with Marella. Santino goes for a headlock and Gabriel just shoves him off, and Santino keeps the headlock position as he stumbles forward. Gabriel then gets a headlock of his own and shoves Gabriel off into the ropes, and went Gabriel goes for a rebound clothesline, Marella does the splits and ducks it! He takes Gabriel over with a judo throw, as Noah Mercy mentions that Marella was a legit judo champion in his youth. Marella asks Gabriel if that is all he has, and Gabriel goes for a jumping spin kick, but Marella ducks and then goes to hit Gabriel with one of his own. Gabriel ducks that and goes for another of his own. This continues a few more times, with neither guy getting the spin kick. Marella then breaks the cycle by slapping Gabriel in the face. A furious Gabriel charges and gets caught with a headlock takeover from Marella, who yells out “I’m winning!”

Gabriel manages to get to his feet and puts pressure on one of Marella’s legs and breaks the headlock. He explodes in a fury with hard strikes to Santino. He throws Marella into the corner and unloads on him there. Gabriel finally connects with the jumping spin kick he wanted, but it only gets two. Gabriel locks in a gogoplata-style submission on Marella, but Santino manages to get to the ropes. Gabriel charges, but gets back body dropped over. He lands on the apron and takes out Marella with a slingshot Liger kick back into the ring. From there, Gabriel goes up top and hits his 450 Splash (which he is now calling the “Fall From Grace”) for the pin.

Result: Justin Gabriel (1-0) over Santino Marella (0-1) via pinfall with a Fall From Grace.

Noah Mercy goes to ask “The Black Angel” some questions, but decides against it, and instead raises Santino Marella’s arm. He gets a loud pops for his better than expected efforts. Justin Gabriel just looks back in the ring shaking his head.

MVP appears on the screen and informs us that next week, we will indeed get a rematch between Paul London & Brian Kendrick and The Young Bucks; and it will be the main event, and we’ll go into extra innings if we have to. There will be a winner, and will learn who advances closer to their goals of becoming the first-ever NAPW World Tag Team Champions. We’ll also see Eddie Colon vs. Homicide.

*Commercial break*

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Sheamus is out, without the accessories from last week. This is serious business.

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Kiyoshi Raijin is out, accompanied with Shoichi Funaki and a similar theme to this blaring over the top (obviously with a different video). It seems to be the groups shared entrance.

Match Five: Sheamus (0-1) vs. Kiyoshi Raijin (0-0)

Sheamus starts on the attack. He goes right after Kiyoshi and his size and power overwhelm the smaller competitor. He has Kiyoshi in the corner and doesn’t let him out, choking him, kicking him, using his boot to scrape the face. Funaki is furious, and tells the referee to get control of this match in Japanese. Noah Mercy informs us that he just called Sheamus “a roided up Conan O’Brien.” Sheamus whips Kiyoshi into the opposite corner, but Kiyoshi backflips out of the corner, and then nails Sheamus with a dropkick. Kiyoshi hits a charging knee in the corner, and then hits a snapmare followed by a sort of Mr. Perfect-style neck-snap on Sheamus out of the corner. Kiyoshi goes up top and comes down with a missile dropkick for two on Sheamus.

Timmy NcNulty informs us that we are turning towards the crowd for some reason. Yoshi Tatsu has bought a ticket to this match! “He’s not technically at ringside, Timmy” informs Mercy. Suddenly, someone else turns up in the audience. It’s...Fit Finlay?!? William Regal runs down to ringside and starts brawling with Funaki. Sheamus is in control of the match now, as Kiyoshi is seemingly distracted by this, and gets nailed with a low knee by Sheamus. Irish Curse backbreaker connects from Sheamus. Brogue Kick to Kiyoshi Raijin with Kiyoshi on his knees. Sheamus picks him up and nails the High Cross for the pin.

Result: Sheamus defeats Kiyoshi Raijin via pinfall with the High Cross.

Yoshi Tatsu has jumped the ring barricade and knocks down William Regal, but gets jumped on by Sheamus & Finlay. They throw him into the ring steps. Noah Mercy goes to ask what is going on, but decides better against it, as they are beating down Yoshi Tatsu now. Security runs out to separate the two apparent forces, and MVP is out trying to cool things down, as Funaki yells at him in Japanese, while Sheamus seemingly wants to kill Funaki, Tatsu & Raijin.

We got to the back, and Rey Mysterio is walking to the ring, where he is about to call out whoever attacked him. He doesn’t need to wait that long, though, as the masked figure again strikes while Mysterio is walking down a hallway. The beat-down again results with the katahijime clutch being applied to Mysterio, choking him out. The masked figure then approaches the camera and says “Muerte al Rey” (“Death to the King”).

*Commercial break*

When we return, we get a video of Jimmy Yang saying that he has been paid to play a ninja, a member of the Yakuza, a cowboy, and many other ridiculous things in his career. But over those years, he has garnered 11 years experience, and he’s only 29 years old. He’s also saved up millions of dollars. No more gimmicks. Thanks to MVP and NAPW, he’s now a man free to let his talents speak for themselves. He’s “The Million Dollar Talent” Jimmy Yang.

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Match Five: John Morrison (1-0) vs. “The Million Dollar Talent” Jimmy Yang (0-0)

Morrison and Yang shake hands, and Mercy talks about a series of matches these two had when Shannon Moore was Yang’s partner and The Miz was Morrison’s, and that Yang actually got some technical victories over Morrison. Mercy says that this could either work for Yang or against him, as he knows he can beat Morrison, but on the other hand, Morrison is not going to be overlooking Yang.

Morrison starts by grounding Yang, but Yang seems even more agile than Morrison, and manages to hit a corkscrew enziguri seemingly out of nowhere. Yang starts some offence early, and whips Morrison into the corner and hits a Tiger Mask kick, and then a spinning heel kick in the corner, and he skins the cat so he is across the ropes in the corner. From there Yang adjusts himself, and his a flying sidekick off the top rope, but only gets a two count on Morrison. Yang gets a facelock on Morrison, but Morrison manages to power into a flapjack on Yang, and Morrison then manages to build offence of his own. Things seem down for Yang when he takes John Morrison’s “Shining Shaman” knee to the face. But Yang manages to kick out at a two count.

Yang gets whipped into the corner, but runs up it and nails Morrison with a Moonsault Press out of nowhere for a two count. Yang goes for some sort of suplex maneuver on Morrison, but Morrison floats over and turns it into an O’Connor roll for a close two. Morrison then nails Yang with a Superkick, which he is now calling “The Delightener.” Morrison gets the pin out of nowhere on Yang.

Result: John Morrison (2-0) defeats Jimmy Yang (0-1) via pinfall with The Delightener.”

After the match, Morrison is celebrating as his old MNM music hits. Out comes Joey Mercury, and he has a mic:

Joey Mercury: “Congratulations, John. Sincerely! Many people think that you are going to be the first-ever NAPW World Heavyweight Champion. Hell, I’m one of those people. After all, I know how good you are. We were tag team partners a few years ago and I taught you everything you know! When we both sign NAPW contracts, I suggest we get the old band together and show these young bucks with heart in the tag team division what real World Tag Team Champions look like. You claim that you’re not a materialistic man, but you are the most selfish son of a bitch I have ever known in my life. When is Joey Mercury’s chance?”

John Morrison: “You had yours last week and you lost to Eddie Colon.”

Joey Mercury: “Shut up! My chance is coming. And it just so happens that I am materialistic, and I do want to be a champion for the sake of having a big shiny belt. That’s why I’ve formed an alliance with the man who can help me achieve that.”

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The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived is here! Austin Aries makes his way to the stage and puts his arm around Joey Mercury and addresses him without even looking at him.

Austin Aries: “Congratulations, my boy. You have made the greatest decision you will not only make in your career, but in your life. I will be a far better partner to you than John Morrison ever was. Right, Morrison? You claim to be a man who does not care about the material world, but you seem to ignore that we live in a material universe. You can be broken physically, John, and when I eventually get you in that ring, that is exactly what will happen. I am The Grand Multitasker, I am The Master of the Material Universe...I am The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived! I am “The God of War” Austin Aries.

Timmy NcNulty and Noah Mercy inform us jarringly that this is all we have time for this week, but surely something will go down between these two egos next week!

*End show*

[Lock Jaw]

Just skimmed over the shows, looking like a fantastic week. God job everyone. :y:

Looking forward to everyone's reviews!

[XL]

I haven't read any of the shows yet, despite having access to some of them for afew days now. Looking forward to them though.

[The Show Off]

Universal Carnage Enterprises: Week Two Review
by The Show Off

• Nice dig at WWE Did You Know to start off the show.

• The authority figure cracking down on all the interference from last week makes a lot of sense, and places an emphasis on the in ring action.

• Gail Kim being made to look good is a good move but you don’t make either Velvet or McCool look bad either which is good. We see that their isn’t a simple heel face dynamic these ladies have specific issues with one another which is more attention than the ladies usually get.

• Wow, an amazing promo by Gail Kim accentuated by Kong destroying a guy going to the bathroom during the match. At first I didn’t understand this beating but in the context of the Gail Kim promo, it was brilliant. I cannot praise you enough for this well thought out an well written story line. I look forward to see how Gail Kim intends to “save” women’s wrestling and a Beth Phoenix/Awesome Kong match seems like a fantastic start.

• John Cena pulling up in a limo is a great little detail to show him as a “corporate champ.” Though I do still hate him being the guardian of the belt but there is little to be done about that now.

• Maybe I’m simple but I find the Darren Young thing funny.

• For a 10 minute match you have to give a little more than 3 short sentences describing the match. I’m not saying you have to write hold for hold what happens in the match but something more to hold on to.

• The Ziggler promo did little for me and Del Rio coming in at the end didn’t really do much for me either. They’re forced to work together but they don’t like one another (Yawn).

• Mickie James and AJ went to the cliché store and bought their promo on UCE for $1.75 and still over paid. They better come stronger than that with Gail Kim being such a strong heel if Mickie is a strong (character wise) face the women’s feud could be gangbusters. Try to make Mickie more than a one dimensional face and you could have the best feud in Armchair Warfare on your hands.

• Shelton Benjamin and Hernandez advancing is a good move as both are good wrestlers but we know nothing about either man. Being in the semi finals we should at least hear one of them cut a promo by now.

• Christian and Rhino don’t sound like Christian and Rhino the sound like Generic Wrestler A and B.

• Nice job of building up Sarita by talking about her background.

• I’m frustrated. Gail Kim’s promo was astounding and then we get Mickie and Beth talking and they’re tragically bland.

• Decent little promo by AJ and Sting nothing special though.

• I like the way the Rhino/Christian/Storm things is playing out but it could have been much better if the interaction backstage was better.

• A really good promo by Douglas Williams make me hope he wins the championship and names in the United Kingdome Championship.

• Nice little interview with John Cena really gets across the character.

• Congratulation you brought it back, the decimation of Beth Phoenix along with the promo by Gail and Mickie made the Gail Kim/Mickie James feud quite great again. Nice set up for next week as well. I absolutely love this feud.

• The main event was lackluster. Of the five men at the end of the show (Cena, Sting, Styles, Del Rio, and Ziggler) only John Cena do I have any interest in. Sting is bland and has done nothing. Styles is bland but at least you made him look credible which is the problem I had last week. Del Rio didn’t do as much for me as he did the week before. Ziggler is a bland heel which is a cardinal sin.

• I’m disappointed we didn’t get a Cena/Darren Young interaction this week.

[Swiss Ultimate]

UCE TV Report


Show opens up with divas wrestling and just like in real life I turn the channel.
I already enjoyed what you were doing with Cena entrance/commercial are increasing my interest.
Dueling Young segment was 50/50, I didn’t like it even though I am cool with Darren’s gimmick.
Young VS. Benjamin might have been fun to watch but, it was shorter than the diva match and that’s not cool. You need to prioritize. Also, there was no instant gratification from the Young VS. Young segment prior to this so having Eric lose clean means either this is going to be a long story arc or you just didn’t care enough to have Darren Young distract Eric from the crowd (it wouldn’t count as real interference!)
Like the Dolph/Del Rio segment a lot.
AJ Styles started his career in 1998. Mickie James started her career in 1999 and yet was a big inspiration for AJ getting into the business. Incorrect.
Giggled at Hernandez filling up his special meter. I feel like they could have had a longer match and I would have enjoyed it. 6 minutes?
Christian/Rhino segment moved the story along though did not interest me.
11 minute diva match. Are you kidding me? God I hate divas…
Diva segment too?
You actually write AJ Styles exactly how he talks. Sting comes off well here too. Impressive.
Storm/Rhino matchup and aftermath was decent. Still shorter than the shortest diva match on the show for some reason.
Skimmed the Williams promo due to boredom. No heel heat here…
Cena interview was great. Nuff said.
17 minutes of women’s wrestling. Fuck you buddy.
Cena/Del Rio segment was interesting.
No time for the main event but, it looked decent. Little disappointed that nobody came out to interfere thus being banned “indefinitely”…unless I missed it? Cena VS. AJ is hot. AJ’s win over Del Rio puts him up a bit in my eyes.


Sadly, I would have missed most of this due to the inordinate amount of women’s wrestling. C+

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Michael Cole’s return didn’t interest me but, I see how a beloved announcer’s return should be a big deal. Also gives us back-story on Kane’s mask.
You spelt Bryan’s name wrong.
Enjoy the fact that Low Ki won and that Wade came back with a sneak attack. Snot rockets are gross though. Would love to see Danielson VS. Low Ki at the PPV in a 60 Minute Iron-Man
Decent match and I enjoy the Family recruitment angle. Carlito comes off as a strong heel champion. Also dig Carlito/Orton alliance.
Two DQs in a row isn’t great TV, however Carlito’s DQ was post-match while this just seems to be you showing everyone how Kane and Abyss are just a ruthless tag team. Dig Morgan’s run-in. Really enjoying the pacing of your show.
Carlito’s promo is great and makes me interested in his character.
Your tag title scene is the antithesis of what I look for in tag team wrestling, however I am actually very interested in what you’re doing.
I like Low Ki coming down to the ring but, I feel that it doesn’t make sense for him not to mention Wade Barrett’s brutal attack and act of disrespect. If someone shot their snot onto me I’d be pretty pissed about that and want to talk about it more than my rivalry with Bryan Danielson.
Sounds like a good match. Also dig the Uso losing streak.
3^rd DQ of the night. Will we see something similar to what UCE did this week?
Chavo in the main-event makes it feel lackluster to me, but you seem to have him come off as legit so I’ll hold my judgment on the issue. Enjoy the way you introduce Jesse Gordy, I expect a lot from him now. I hated the Double H comment though.


Basically enjoyed all the wrestling though the main-event felt a bit mid-card. Enjoying all the storylines and would have watched the show all the way through. B+


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Drew impresses with a nice heel promo for the open
Chairless Van Daminator or did he get a chair and do the traditional VD? Oh well, I don’t mind watching RVD squash matches so I’ll assume this was decent. Raven run-in leads to Raven being taken out. I assumed Raven was being pushed better than that.
Dislike the Hurricane segment
Hardy/Moore segment seemed pointless
Diva wrestling and a bathroom break
Decent Slater promo
Decent match with Hurricane and Wolfe, Kennedy announcing was good. Solid. Not a fan of Hurricane still. Aftermath was decent.
Sounds like a fun match between Dudleys and Hardy Boyz. You did a good job of making Neal come off as somewhat legit. Note: Shannon Moore cannot stand tall over anyone.
Daniels over Watson. Nice quick match. Someone is trying to build up the Fallen Angel.
Taker and Drew with some nice action and then Daniels coming out and looking strong as shit. Fallen Angel VS. The Phenom. I’m digging it.


Your show has moved on up in my book. B+

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Horrible format still.
You save your show in my eyes with an excellent opening segment. Swagger and Jericho both come off as important and I really just love where this is going. Batista not even knowing the name of the company was a nice touch too.
Kurt and Big Show coming in as the main faces of the company is not a bad way to do things. I still don’t like Comedy Show but, you could do a lot worse. You manage to make me interested in your PPV main-event with this segment.
A tag match that would have had me watching the show for sure. Excellent post-match segment as well. I now care about your Tag division.
Another good segment with Batista and Jericho. Your entire show has improved for me. Leaps and fucking bounds.
Burke VS. Kofi is another match that I’d actually enjoy watching. Good booking. R-Truth with a message for Burke and Shad was good too, even though him putting out a rap album is nothing but bad news for music. Also really love where this angle is going.
Good match between Jericho and the Big Show. Didn’t see or understand the Batista swerve but I enjoyed it.
Bourne VS. Miz for the PPV? That’s where they were headed next in the DWW. :D Really liked this segment. Miz sounds better this week than he did last week.
CM Punk/Flair segment was decent. I wouldn’t mind watching this match a few years ago but, I really don’t think Flair could hang with Punk these days. I’d rather have seen Punk in the main-event scene somehow. Preferences, ya know?
Evan with a big win. Interesting that Christy’s face-actions are getting her and her entire stable banned from title matches. Actually interested where this is going.
5 star match from Kurt and Swagger. I support your decision to keep Kurt in the main-event. So now it looks like Batista VS. Show and Jericho VS. Kurt.


Major turn-around for me. What was my least favorite show is now my favorite. You won me over dude. A+


NAPW TV Report


I like the tone of this show. Comes off as an actual competition instead of an over-produced action sit-com.

Lethal picks up a win thanks to Homicide and finds out after the match how he won. Neat.
A solid segment with Morrison and Santino.
Informative and well-written promo between MVP and Homicide.
Good match between MVP and Regal
Liked the tag match ending on a time-limit draw
Again, really enjoy the serious tone going into the next match
Decent match between Santio and Gabriel. Confused at why someone not in the match raised Santino’s arm after his loss.
MVP’s promising us a winner between the Young Bucks and the Bogus Journeys, nice!
Glad Sheamus picked up a win here.
Backstage attack on Rey fits better into the show this time then it did last week. Who is this fag?
Sounds like a hot main-event. Enjoyed Mercury’s turn on his former partner. Don’t really care so much about Austin Aries.



I'd watch your show for the matches alone. A-

Stay Tuned here for show reviews, will update as I finish them.

[Armchair Booker]

To be fair, UCE has both AJ Styles and AJ Lee (NXT Diva). I think that may be part of your confusion, DttS.

[Swiss Ultimate]

To be fair, UCE has both AJ Styles and AJ Lee (NXT Diva). I think that may be part of your confusion, DttS.

Definitely. Only read "AJ". Thank you for setting me straight.

[Mickie James is getting ready for action in the women’s locker room. A.J. bounces in.]

A.J.: Hey Mickie!

Mickie James: Hey, A.J.

A.J.: Listen, I just wanted to tell you not to pay attention to anything Gail Kim says. You didn’t “drop the ball”. You were one of my inspirations to get into this business, and I can only hope to represent women with as much strength and heart as you have. I’ll always be there for you when you need it.

Mickie James: Thanks, that means a lot to me. But I’m not going to let anything Gail Kim says get under my skin. I’ve had all sorts of things hurled at me during my career, and I’ve overcome them all. Gail Kim is no different.Thought AJ was doing a transvestite gimmick here.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>UCE

-Props for trying to legitimize the women’s division.

-Even more props for having Gail Kim be the “speaker” on behalf of women’s wrestling.

-Darren Young is out of his mind. I like it.

-Cool little reference to Dolph’s old introduction gimmick

-Cena having his own brand of everything is funny and works with the gimmick.

-Good job writing interviews throughout the show. Everybody sounds how they are supposed to sound.

-Rhino being blinded by beer is a nice touch.

-Once again I can’t stress enough how good the women’s division is. Ordinarily 3 divas shows on one card would feel like a rip-off to the viewer but you managed to make it interesting.

-Good job building up to the main event throughout the show.

-Main event scene is interesting, looking forward to reading next week’s show.</font>

[Swiss Ultimate]

DONE!

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>IWC

-I like the Taz and Cole team. Reminds me of the SmackDown days.

-Good detail in the matches although it can be a bit much at times.

-Eager to see where Danielson/Ki goes.

-Cool twist with Carlito going apeshit on McGillicutty and aligning with Orton/HHH.

-Something about a hoss tag match/feud with Kane/Abyss against Morgan/Gallows actually sounds intriguing to me.

-More buildup to Danielson/Ki. That should be great.

-I applaud you for trying to give some personality to Jey Uso.

-Kozlov winning in one move last week still feels like a weird decision after he struggled to beat Rhodes.

-Jesse Gordy. Nice!

-I really love the Family/Anti-Family feud. It’s been very well-built thus far.</font>

[Armchair Booker]

IWC booker here. Kozlov normally would have had a similar struggle with Orton in Week 1 if not for 2 things:

1) Orton was just brawling with the Family moments earlier, and 2) Koslov had the element of surprise on his side. Orton had forgotten he was there while Jarrett was issuing his decree.

Was it a bit of a cop out to not really have the main event match Week 1? Maybe. But would people have thrown a fit had the advertized match not taken place? Youbetcha.

[Swiss Ultimate]

IWC booker here. Kozlov normally would have had a similar struggle with Orton in Week 1 if not for 2 things:

1) Orton was just brawling with the Family moments earlier, and 2) Koslov had the element of surprise on his side. Orton had forgotten he was there while Jarrett was issuing his decree.

Was it a bit of a cop out to not really have the main event match Week 1? Maybe. But would people have thrown a fit had the advertized match not taken place? Youbetcha.

Personally I really enjoyed Kozlov going over. The guy is intimidating but, at the same time not what I would consider a legitimate threat to the title under normal circumstances. Orton's distraction leading to him being knocked out with one move was a nice touch and added to the unpredictable aspect that I enjoy so much about your show.

[Swiss Ultimate]

Season 3 Suggestion: We get into a time-machine and go back to 1998 for our rosters.

[Flash Funk]

That would be awesome

[Swiss Ultimate]

Austin VS. Goldberg

Undertaker VS. Hollywood Hogan

The Rock VS. DDP (People's Champ VS. People's Champ)

Sabu VS. Mankind

Kevin Nash VS. Undertaker

Jericho VS. Everyone

[Anybody Thrilla]

The Attitude Era is over. DEAL WITH IT.

[VSG]

We demand Big Dick Johnson make his much awaited debut in Armchair Warfare!

[Swiss Ultimate]

The Attitude Era is over. DEAL WITH IT.

Think of this as "therapy".

[The Show Off]

Impact Wrestling Corporation: Week Two Review
by The Show Off

• I’m glad you at least explained why Kane is back in the mask.

• Garnering sympathy for Michael Cole isn’t easy and I’ve found even as a burn victim I still don’t sympathize. But at least you have a good commentary team.

• Good match with Ki and Barrett but I still don’t know the deal with either of them, the match has no context. The context is then provided after the match. I guess Ki and Danielson are trying to impress one another.

• Carlito being recruited to The Family makes a lot of sense him denying it also makes a lot of sense.

• What is the Gateway Championship? Is it just a secondary championship or are their some special stipulations to it?

• Good match between McGillicuty and Carlito. I like that he has aligned himself with Randy Orton and Triple H the idea of faction vs. faction is always a nice dynamic. Unfortunately the trio of Orton, Triple H, and Carlito seems vastly superior to The Family as far as talent goes and they have less members. The heel faction shouldn’t be at a disadvantage in number it just doesn’t make for a pleasing dynamic.

• Abyss and Kane vs. Gallows and Morgan does little to nothing for me. You built up Morgan well last week and you tried to build up Gallows this week, but I’m not buying.

• Carlito vs. McGillacutty rematch next week and if he wins he gets a title shot. Shouldn’t next week be the title shiot since McGillicutty already won this week?

• I like the authenticity of having a corporate sponsor.

• A friendly rivalry between Ki and Danielson is good, I like the context of this rivalry. Them trying to impress one another is a good way to considering their background.

• Good way of trying to legitimize Jey Uso by making him actively seek membership with The Family by taking on Husky Harris.

• Good way of selling Dustin as a great competitor while simultaneously expressing that he is a compromised competitor.

• Good way of having Orton cost Dustin his match and get revenge against Koslov.

• Finally we hear from Triple H! The promo was bland but we’ve heard he was aligned with Orton for a show and ¾ and he now finally opens his mouth. The promo itself was bland but effective.

• You’re quite good at talking up a match before it starts, I actually believe Chavo has something to prove despite nothing mentioned about his vouching for Orton before hand.

• Triple H not pinning Chavo so he could beat him up as much as he wants in the context of the match is a good move by the Cerebral Assassin.

• Jesse Gordy run it! Yeah it’s not that big a deal. But if he is a member of The Family wouldn’t he be suspended?

[The Show Off]

Bad Ass Wrestling: Week Two Review
by The Show Off

• The Drew McIntyre promo is okay… nay mediocre and doesn’t sound all that much like Drew McIntyre. I’m not a big fan of the heel attacking a face because he’s beloved. A heel like Drew McIntyre shouldn’t care at all about what the fans think.

• Rob Van Dam v. Jesse Neal does nothing for me. Raven attacking Rob Van Dam and getting nailed with a Van Daminator does even less for me. I understand it’s the continuation of what was set up last show but Raven/RVD isn’t an interesting program unless Raven plays mind games. Instead of making him look menacing you make him look foolish.

• Hurricane/Gregory Helms silliness is just that, silliness.

• Jeff Hardy/Shannon Moore interaction backstage makes no sense.

• You make Daffney look like a psychopath which would be good if you have her leading to anything, but as of now it doesn’t seem like you do.

• Heath’s promo doesn’t set the world on fire but it establishes why he cut Skip loose.

• Desmond Wolfe/Hurricane match was pretty good, I don’t understand the wisdom of having Hurricane win when you already established Wolfe the week before, but I’m willing to see what happens.

• It seems as though we’ll get a 4 way match for the IC title with Kaz/Wolfe/Hurricane/Kennedy that’s a match I can dig if that’s where you’re going with it, all solid competitors.

• Daniels not saying anything foreshadows something dark has come over the Fallen Angel, I hopes this pays off tonight because Daniels really need the rub and quick.

• I like that Ink Inc. come out and try to establish some dominance within the tag team landscape. With Shannon’s relationship with the Hardys and Jesse’s relationship with Team 3D it should be an interesting feud.

• I like Daniels stealing The Undertaker’s gimmick and destroying Percy Watson. I’m usually not too fond of squash matches but this one served a definite purpose.

• Really entertaining match with Drew and The Undertaker, but even better was the ending. You made Christopher Daniels look like a million bucks which was very very important. We’re still not quite at the place where people believe Daniels to be a threat but we’re rapidly approaching that place, which is a very good job.

• The lack of Samoa Joe is evident, you needed to have him either show up or explain why he wasn’t at the show. Joe wouldn’t be the type of person that wouldn’t get immediate revenge.

[The Show Off]

Hard Knocks Wrestling: Week Two Review
by The Show Off

• We start the show off with trying to re-establish Swagger as someone legit. He comes out whining about unfair treatment which fits him like a glove.

• Jericho comes out and starts rocking the mic in a scintillating promo, you’ve really seemed to capture the voice of Jericho down, good job.

• I see you’ve taken some criticism of your show’s motif to heart, yet you still don’t back off from continuing the motif along, good job of answering critiques yet keeping your voice.

• The stand up comedy gimmick is terrible… I know I said it last week but I’m just going to keep saying it as it persists.

• I understand you want to set the stage for the show, and you’re going a great job, but there is no need to bring out the entire roster in the opening segment.

• So Angle and Big Show are idiots… I mean stand up guys and are willing to put their title shots on the line tonight. I usually hate when faces do this sort of thing as it makes them look stupid but anything that gets us away from a Angle/Show main event at the PPV is a good move.

• Nice match between the Guns and Busters.

• I’m loving the exchange between the Guns and DiBiase & Rhodes. Them coming out with their own belts is especially entertaining since, as the Guns said, they’ve literally done nothing in the organization to date.

• The beat down is fairly standard stuff, could have done without it but its fine.

• I hate the stand up comedy gimmick (I have to say it every time because that’s just how dumb it is) but I love Jericho’s manipulation of it which is brilliant.

• Nice way to make the Elijah/Truth thing interesting. Racial gimmicks are always difficult to prolong though so be mindful of that when trying to unfold this story.

• Good to see Jericho in the main event and that he successfully managed to manipulate Batista, it was a well booked match that made all involved look good.

• The Bourne/Christy/Team Awesome backstage promo was pretty good. It seemed like silly high school nonsense that gets over dramatized and I get the sense that that is exactly what you were aiming for. It came across really well.

• I loved the Ric Flair/CM Punk promo LOVED IT. Until Flair for some stupid reason puts his title on the line after only dealing with Punk for one show. Then Punk brings sense to the thing and doesn’t accept the challenge. This is until Flair yells WOOO a few times then he’s willing to put his career on the line. That’s just stupid.

• I like the advancing of the Christy/Evan story and the fact that Striker shows he’s in charge. Well played but I expect we haven’t seen the last of Team Awesome.

• Kurt Angle wins his rematch in a loooooong match with Swagger. It’s good to see you’ve given Swagger some credibility but you should have had this match last week instead of squashing him. This match helps Swagger but not nearly as much as it would have hand this been our first impression of Swagger.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>So school has been ridiculous lately so I haven't really got time to finish my Week 2 reviews, but some really quick generalized notes:

BAW: Decent stories but I'm just not sure on some things. Your characters seem to constantly make references to things that happened in WWE and such. What if by some chance the viewers are new? I do really enjoy the main event scene though and the Hurricane/Wolfe feud is good.

HKW and NAPW: I put these two as one because quite frankly they are neck and neck in terms of my favorite, and to me they seem absurdly similar. Both do an awesome job of character development. I guess I can't help but be slightly more partial to NAPW in this respect since they've created almost entirely new characters whereas HKW takes characters that already existed and just writes brilliant promos for them...but both are great. The one thing I will say though is that the matches can be almost TOO detailed at times. I've found myself skimming over a few lines to get to the winding-down portion of the match just because it was a lot to digest.

Overall, some awesome shows this week. Great work everybody, and I look forward to seeing what Week 3 brings.</font>

[Ultra Mantis]

The Best and Worst of Armchair Warfare 2: Week Two

Strong set of shows here, the promotion that was my favourite last week didn't even get a look in at the top this week so it's obvious there isn't going to be a runaway winner this time around. Here are my company-by-company highlights of the night and biggest internet message board complaints for this week.

Universal Carnage Enterprises
+ Christian, Rhino and James Storm are three charismatic performers and this feud could really take off in coming weeks leading to a good PPV match.
+ Midcard title tournament now seems to be down to the “serious” guys, I’d like to see more build for Shelton and Hernandez because at the moment it seems like Williams is the obvious winner.
+ You obviously care about women’s wrestling and are trying to make it a legit division in your promotion.

- While Cena as a heel is fresh, he’s still being shoved down the audience's throat. I liked the merch pushing gimmick (for what I assumed was not real merch?) the first few times but it reached the point of overkill in it’s debut episode. On top of that we have the whole limo entrance, the “what’s Cena going to do tonight?” anticipation and on top of that, a pre taped sit down interview. It was just too much.
- The show had too much women’s wrestling for my taste. Combined with the constant Cena segments I don’t think I would have been able to watch this show through to the end without giving up.
- Ziggler should have been the guy to be pinned in the tag match. While AJ needs to look credible going into the PPV, so does Del Rio. Ziggler doesn’t really need protecting here since his match with Sting isn‘t as important, Ziggler could have even taken out Sting before losing clean to Styles.

Impact Wrestling Corporation
+ Good to see Carlito in a role he deserves, his actions against McGillicutty and his promo were believable and it’s nice to see another strong midcard champion.
+ Danielson and Low Ki once again look strong. Interested to see where you go with this since it’s on a “respect” level right now, but how long will it stay that way?
+ You’re legitimising guys who aren’t really seen as main event players such as Chavo, Kozlov and Goldust. I can buy into these three guys as you‘re presenting them, but...

- Jesse takes out HHH. Slam Master J. Come on.
- The Orton / Barrett finish from Bragging Rights was similar to the Rhodes / Kozlov finish but I’m chalking this one up to co-incidence and it made sense in the context of the story.
- Still a little confused about heel / face dynamics. While a few guys seem to be clearly defined heels or faces, a majority of the roster seem to be tweeners. The Family for example are a dominant face stable with heels having to join forces to bring them down? Interesting, I‘m not sure it works but it‘s interesting.

Bad Ass Wrestling
+ Daniels looks a lot stronger. He definitely needed that squash over Percy Watson and to get in some offence on The Undertaker. Not sure that I buy tiny Chris Daniels as a monster heel though.
+ IC division continues to look good. Might have had Wolfe go over here for the better PPV match, but I have a feeling this one is going to end up as a four way so Hurricane picking up the win is fine.
+ Hardys vs. Dudleys seems like a “one more match” kind of deal on paper so it’s probably a good thing they didn’t get a finish here. This seems to be leading to a TLC match at the PPV where they can pass the torch to Ink Inc.

- Three guys on the roster use superpowers. Not really what I expected from this show after last week.
- Undertaker really should have gone over Drew here, this is his TV debut and not only does he not beat McIntyre but he gets owned by a guy half his size.
- Tag division does not seem that fresh, anything other than Ink Inc going over for the belts seems unappealing to me, the company could use some younger teams to freshen up the scene (shame about Skip / Slater).


Hard Knocks Wrestling
+ Great opening segment, there are a lot of huge stars in this company and they all seem to be getting a chance to shine. Very glad to see Swagger redeemed after last week.
+ I already love the MCMG vs. Priceless feud. Teddy (I would assume) buying the tag titles is a nice touch.
+ Great balance of big name stars and great wrestling, almost everybody was used right on this show. Angle vs. Swagger would have been match of the week at the very least and having MCMG as the first match bookends this show very nicely. A lot of feuds are popping up organically, even Batista vs. Big Show doesn’t come across as forced.

- Flair in another retirement match is not where I would have hoped the Punk feud ended up. Mainly because I don’t believe Ric Flair is actually going to keep his word and he will probably end up in UCE earning more money and jobbing to Darren Young (once Russo has taken over from the current UCE booker at the end of the month).
- Poor Kofi, maybe he will get a token victory over Paul Burchill someday as a thank you for putting everyone over strong.
- Not sure why Swagger was buried so hard last week, hopefully there was a purpose behind it that will be revealed in coming weeks to get him on the PPV.

New Age Pro Wrestling
+ I’m actually supporting Primo and wanted him to pick up the win here. Never thought that would happen.
+ The Justin Gabriel angle is very interesting, I like the idea of him being a babyface in exile due to his Nexus past.
+ Aside from Morrison (who is looking like a huge star) I have no idea who’s going to main event the PPV, I love the unpredictability of the booking, it feels like anybody could get a push at any time.

- I’m not too big on guys being thrown into stables based solely on nationality since it‘s been done to death. Hopefully there is a twist in this UK + Ireland vs. Japan feud.
- I would have liked to see a winner in the tag match since it’s a stacked division and a lot of teams are still on 0-0 records heading towards the PPV.
- Again, lack of huge stars might put off casual fans. With that said, Sheamus is back on the right path dropping the sword gimmick and Morrison, Aries, Eddie Colon, Tatsu and others are being built towards main event status in an effective way.

[The Show Off]

New Age Pro Wrestling: Week Two Review
by The Show Off

• Good match to kick off the show. I like Homicide coming out to help Lethal, adds a little intrigue to both men.

• Morrison’s promo was okay. He’s not about material things, well that’s okay. His reasoning for not helping Mysterio was also okay. So all and all we’re just at an okay.

• MVP explains where he got his money for NAPW and it doesn’t seem to compute that he can run a whole company based on a Smackdown contract, but that’s just nit picking so it’s not like that’ll be held against you.

• Homicide comes out with a blistering promo talking about things being handed to other and him having to work for everything. Good job of making a very generic promo premise interesting. I like that Homicide comes out an curses but you should have had MVP reprimand him for that or something just to make the act of saying those words seem more rebellious.

• Interesting turn by MVP not taking shit from Homicide.

• Eddie Colon makes the whole promo bland but at least when Homicide and MVP talk I’m listening.

• I love the way you hype wrestlers when they come out. You make every wrestler seem like a viable threat to the title.

• I like the match between Regal and MVP and I like that he has a good finisher now “To the Bank” is an alright name for a finisher. Not great.

• You even put over the concept of tag team wrestling, good job.

• The tag match ending in a draw is a bit of a cop out, but we get a good match out of it so it’s all a wash. We also get to see other teams scouting which is also good.

• Adding Funaki to the Japanese wrestlers works but why is he just a manager? Can he not still wrestle?

• Regal looking out for Sheamus was odd, but it played up the Japanese wrestlers as a threat which is good.

• I’m confused by the raising of Santino’s hand seems kinda stupid since he’s lost the quickest match of the night.

• Sheamus picks up a much needed win, good to see you didn’t put him in a hole against the Japanese wrestlers.

• UK guys versus Japanese guys… could work.

• Creepy little attack on Mysterio, I like it.

• “Million Dollar Talent” good name… “Million Dollar Talent” Jimmy Yang… stupid. If he was just going to let his talent speak for itself he should have forgone a nickname.

• Morrison/Matthews confrontation wasn’t all that great then A Double comes out and… well I like Austin Aries but that promo wasn’t very good, and it ended your show… But it does have me wanting to tune in next week so it has accomplished what it needs to.

[VSG]

I hope the deadline has been extended :p

[XL]

Why would it be? You still have MS Word, right?

[BizarroKing]

Why would it be? You still have MS Word, right?

I sent mine in already...

[parkmania]

Just got power restored after a tree snapped a line outside the store. Am sending my show in to XL right now.

[XL]

WEEK 2 SCORES

SHOW RANKINGS

The numbers in brackets represent where the show was ranked for each of the 10 Judges. Remember, a 1st place finish gets you 5 Points, 2nd place = 4 and so on.

HKW: (1-1-1-2-1-1-1-4-1-1) for a points total of 46
NAPW: (2-2-4-1-2-2-2-3-3-2) for a points total of 37
IWC: (3-3-3-4-4-4-5-1-2-3) for a points total of 28
UCE: (5-4-2-3-3-3-3-2-4-4) for a points total of 27
BAW: (4-5-5-5-5-5-4-5-5-5) for a points total of 12

After coming in last for Week 1, Hard Knocks Wrestling turns the corner for Week 2 crashing in at the top of the rankings with 8 First Place finishes. All other shows stay in order but Bad Ass Wrestling loses ground with a lowly points total of just 12 Points. However, there is still points available from...



STAR POWER RANKINGS

Every guy that received a vote is listed here. Once again, a 1st place finish = 5 Points for that guy, the scores are totalled and the Top 5 earn their show Bonus Points based on the 1st = 5 Points, 5th = 1 Point system.

1) Chris Jericho (47 Points) [HKW] = 5 POINTS
2) John Morrison (25 Points) [NAPW] = 4 POINTS
3) Christopher Daniels (24 Points) [BAW] = 3 POINTS
4) Kurt Angle (16 Points) [HKW] = 2 POINTS
5) Carlito ( 12 Points) [IWC] = 1 POINT
6) Gail Kim (7 Points)
7) HHH (4 Points)
8) Tatsu (3 Points)
=9) AJ Styles (2 Points)
=9) Ric Flair (2 Points)
=9) MVP (2 Points)
=10) Justin Gabriel (1 Point)
=10) Homicide (1 Point)

What a difference a week makes! Week 2 sees a totally different Top 5 (with 4 of the Top 5 from Week 1 dropping off the rankings entirely!). Chris Jericho must have played a huge part in HKW jumping to the top of the Show Rankings as he is the only performer to appear on all of the Judges' SPR's this week - placking first in all but one.



WEEK 2 TOTAL RANKINGS

1) HARD KNOCKS WRESTLING = 53 POINTS

2) NEW AGE PRO WRESTLING = 41 POINTS

3) IMPACT WRESTLING CORPORATION = 29 POINTS

4) UNIVERSAL CARNAGE ENTERPRISES = 27 POINTS


5) BAD ASS WRESTLING = 15 POINTS

[XL]

OVERALL RANKINGS


1) HARD KNOCKS WRESTLING = 84 POINTS

2) NEW AGE PRO WRESTLING = 75 POINTS

3) IMPACT WRESTLING CORPORATION = 70 POINTS

4) UNIVERSAL CARNAGE ENTERPRISES = 63 POINTS

5) BAD ASS WRESTLING = 43 POINTS

[XL]

HOWEVER...

Nearly 48 hours after the adjusted deadline and I am yet to receive two of the shows. This means that deductions WILL be made, so the scores are set to change.

[Armchair Booker]

From the office of Bad Ass Wrestling's officials...
Rob Van Dam and Raven in a Clockwork Orange House of Fun match has been signed for Road 2 Ruin...and Raven has challenged Van Dam's buddies Team 3D to a handicap Clockwork Orange House of Fun match for this week's BAW Rampage...has the madman lost his mind to challenge one of the toughest tag teams ever to such a match?


http://i955.photobucket.com/albums/ae34/Bizarroking/road2ruincopy.jpg?t=1289174220

<object height="385" width="480">


<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/nn7pz5hXa28?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></object>

[VSG]

Now that's nice, music for the promo as well.

[XL]

So, we are coming up on a week past the original deadline (Wednseday 3rd Nov) and I am still 2 shows short. How do people feel about Week 3 going ahead with 3 shows?

The other 2 would then have to fit all they wanted to into Week 4 and the PPV and would be given equal "bottom" points (15 points each).

The rule that I installed was that the show would lose 5 points for every 12 hours past deadline - looking at 30+ points at the minute. So this might actually be a better option for them.

Thoughts?

[Flash Funk]

I am just sad that no one is voting in the public polls..thought the first two weeks were really good..

[XL]

I know, I know.

All those guys that "really wanted to be judges" too. Looks like they didn't stick around long after they didn't make the cut.

[Armchair Booker]

IWC votes to move on. Hopefully the two missing shows will turn back up for week 4.

[XL]

So, I was gonna go ahead and post the three shows that I have, however, I don't seem to be able to d/l one of them.