Paranoid Rattlesnake
04-26-2004, 08:56 AM
Apr 26 2004
French legend Marcel Desailly's football career is over after an amazing
six letter outburst directed at TV pundit Big 'Ron' Atkinson.
The Chelsea centre back stunned ITV viewers with a tirade against
Atkinson during Tuesday night's live coverage of his side's Champions
League semi-final defeat in Monaco.
With the game slipping away from Chelsea in the second half, Desailly was clearly seen to mouth a derogatory statement about Atkinson.
Although this is a family-oriented website, we have decided to publish
that tirade in full.
Desailly called Atkinson 'Cheap Orange Trash' and a 'Fake Tan Chunky Boy' before laying out Fernando Morientes with a casually misplaced elbow to the head.
Pressure groups were last night up in arms over Desailly's comments.
The South Florida Orange Growers' Association called the outburst 'a
blatant attempt to demonise all things orangey' and a spokesperson for Outspan added that 'This was fruitism of the very worst kind which leaves a nasty taste in the mouth, unlike our consistently juicy and delicious products.'
Atkinson himself was unavailable for comment as he was holed up in a
tanning booth with six kilos of jewellery and a karaoke machine.
But a contrite Desailly issued the following statement: "I made a stupid
remark which I regret.
"It left me no option but to resign. At the moment I can't believe I did
it."
"I was very frustrated during the game because I thought Chelsea could
have won. I regret making the comments and I apologise to anyone I may have offended."
"If you look at my track record as a player, I was one of the first in
the game to give oranges a chance, especially at half time."
Desailly's manager, Claudio Ranieri, confirmed that he had received a
letter of resignation from Marcel.
It is understood that he then turned it into a plane and then a hat and
then a paper chain.
French legend Marcel Desailly's football career is over after an amazing
six letter outburst directed at TV pundit Big 'Ron' Atkinson.
The Chelsea centre back stunned ITV viewers with a tirade against
Atkinson during Tuesday night's live coverage of his side's Champions
League semi-final defeat in Monaco.
With the game slipping away from Chelsea in the second half, Desailly was clearly seen to mouth a derogatory statement about Atkinson.
Although this is a family-oriented website, we have decided to publish
that tirade in full.
Desailly called Atkinson 'Cheap Orange Trash' and a 'Fake Tan Chunky Boy' before laying out Fernando Morientes with a casually misplaced elbow to the head.
Pressure groups were last night up in arms over Desailly's comments.
The South Florida Orange Growers' Association called the outburst 'a
blatant attempt to demonise all things orangey' and a spokesperson for Outspan added that 'This was fruitism of the very worst kind which leaves a nasty taste in the mouth, unlike our consistently juicy and delicious products.'
Atkinson himself was unavailable for comment as he was holed up in a
tanning booth with six kilos of jewellery and a karaoke machine.
But a contrite Desailly issued the following statement: "I made a stupid
remark which I regret.
"It left me no option but to resign. At the moment I can't believe I did
it."
"I was very frustrated during the game because I thought Chelsea could
have won. I regret making the comments and I apologise to anyone I may have offended."
"If you look at my track record as a player, I was one of the first in
the game to give oranges a chance, especially at half time."
Desailly's manager, Claudio Ranieri, confirmed that he had received a
letter of resignation from Marcel.
It is understood that he then turned it into a plane and then a hat and
then a paper chain.