Silly willy kayfabe

[LewisTheTruest]

Basically post things that make no sense in kayfabe.

The whole removal of the monitors from the announce table is stupid. You wanna hurt ur opponent but you'll remove the monitors? They even have it in the video games now.

[Next Big Thing]

Maybe you don't want to have to pick shards of monitor out of your ass or shock yourself?

[Next Big Thing]

All the random shit that gets left under the ring has always been funny to me. Love how the guy who sets up the ring always leaves his sledge hammer or kendo stick under there.

Suspended belief is what makes it all entertaining though. I guess that's with any show.

[LewisTheTruest]

Maybe you don't want to have to pick shards of monitor out of your ass or shock yourself?

Your thinking way to logically. This is silly willy kayfabe.
I totally needed the table under the ring.... Ya know to jump through it n shit.

[Corporate CockSnogger]

"Ooooh I'm so angry you just cost me that match, but instead of going to find you backstage where you just went, I'm going to wait a week to release my anger"

[LewisTheTruest]

I'm a referee and your totally distracting me. Oh wait a pin 1,2,3. You win and I will never question what just happened.

[Lock Jaw]

See: Most of the happenings in wrestling.

[LewisTheTruest]

See: Most of the happenings in wrestling.

I think your missing the point.

[LewisTheTruest]

Undertaker about to rip Austin's heart out or some shit only for Kane to show up and raise hell! Gold.

[Fox]

Referees are susceptible to coma-like bouts of unconsciousness after being punched in the face, while the wrestlers punch each other two dozen times a piece in a span of 15 minutes without such effects.

[Nark Order]

A better question is why do they still use monitors that look like they were assembled in the 1960s?

[Xero]

A better question is why do they still use monitors that look like they were assembled in the 1960s?

I would imagine it's so they don't have to worry about calling something that's just off screen for someone who may be watching it on an SDTV. They normally don't actually watch the action in the ring but on the monitors, so this makes sense.

[LewisTheTruest]

Referees are susceptible to coma-like bouts of unconsciousness after being punched in the face, while the wrestlers punch each other two dozen times a piece in a span of 15 minutes without such effects.

OR they have to be less than 5ft and sell well

[Next Big Thing]

HBK indicating he's about to kick the shit out of a guy by repeatedly stomping but the guy gets up anyways.

Vince McMahon having to walk the way he does because his balls are the size of grapefruits.

[Xero]

"We're obviously in a relationship, but we never see each other except when we're on TV."

"Hey, I'm gonna tell you this really secretive thing in front of a camera crew."

[LewisTheTruest]

I would imagine it's so they don't have to worry about calling something that's just off screen for someone who may be watching it on an SDTV. They normally don't actually watch the action in the ring but on the monitors, so this makes sense.

Yeh and flat screens wouldn't fit into the tables they break every week or so.

[LewisTheTruest]

HBK indicating he's about to kick the shit out of a guy by repeatedly stomping but the guy gets up anyways.

Vince McMahon having to walk the way he does because his balls are the size of grapefruits.

This guy gets it.

[Nicky Fives]

Vince McMahon having to walk the way he does because his balls are the size of grapefruits.

ROFL

[Xero]

Honestly never thought of it that way.

[XL]

Referees are susceptible to coma-like bouts of unconsciousness after being punched in the face, while the wrestlers punch each other two dozen times a piece in a span of 15 minutes without such effects.
That would be the power sapping ability of the black and white striped shirt. Put one of those wrestlers in a ref shirt and they too become victim to its powers.

Other powers include making the wearer hear with their eyes and act inconsistently in calling for DQs, counting to 10, using a replay, etc.

[Next Big Thing]

Bad decisions made after a ref is knocked out and a heel cheats or interferes never being reviewed or reversed despite a big ass jumbotron replaying the events at the top of the stage immediately after the match ends.

[Wishbone]

I've always found it funny when someone attacks or assaults an official or interviewer there is almost never any repercussions. Like it's fine if you nearly kill a guy cause your a wrestler and he won't sue.

[Wishbone]

Also how does the production crew know to start a guy's theme music when he makes a 'surprise' entrance?

[Lock Jaw]

How bout that time when Edge kidnapped Paul Bearer for a few weeks and tortured him, before setting him up to die/be seriously hurt?

No repercussions at all, and through the whole thing he was somehow the good guy.

[MoFo]

Putting on baby oil and sparkly little pants on to fight another man.

[Wishbone]

How bout that time when Edge kidnapped Paul Bearer for a few weeks and tortured him, before setting him up to die/be seriously hurt?

No repercussions at all, and through the whole thing he was somehow the good guy.

Exactly! :lol: And what about Cena stealing Del Rio's car or destroying JBL's limo? How is that not a criminal act?

[Lock Jaw]

I kind of want to make a website called Cenadickery, devoted to all the time that Cena has been a Dick.

Like on RAW two weeks ago, when he tried to volunteer a 54 year old man who had a stroke and severe concussion problems to fight the WWE Champion. Thank goodness John Laurenitis was there to change it into a tag match instead.

[XL]

LOL

[JimmyMess]

the "Flair Bump"

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Va4n6jtQmG4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Nark Order]

Cena also punched a ring announcer right in the face the other night while Miz/Truth were fired for assaulting a referee. CONSPIRACY!

[Next Big Thing]

Exactly! :lol: And what about Cena stealing Del Rio's car or destroying JBL's limo? How is that not a criminal act?

Because the wrestlers obviously sign waivers that say if you, your personal possessions, your title belt, your elderly father or your wife are stolen or destroyed during your employment, you will not sue or press charges.

No different that UFC fighters or boxers really.

[Nark Order]

Also, wtf. Watch this video. Umaga absolutely fucking dismantles Maria and then Cena runs in after Umaga has assaulted her for 3-4 minutes.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qem9nT-ZNQE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Nark Order]

Cena is a dickhead.

[V]

Also how does the production crew know to start a guy's theme music when he makes a 'surprise' entrance?

They've had some scenes where they show a wrestler telling people behind the stage to hit his music because he's going out.

[loopydate]

I kind of want to make a website called Cenadickery, devoted to all the time that Cena has been a Dick.

Like on RAW two weeks ago, when he tried to volunteer a 54 year old man who had a stroke and severe concussion problems to fight the WWE Champion. Thank goodness John Laurenitis was there to change it into a tag match instead.

I would visit that site and recommend it to all my friends. :y:

[CSL]

Also, wtf. Watch this video. Umaga absolutely fucking dismantles Maria and then Cena runs in after Umaga has assaulted her for 3-4 minutes.

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qem9nT-ZNQE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

uhhhh hello

<iframe width="480" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qJ1HXCd7NSo" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[MIZantine Empire]

i always like how easy they throw each other into the ropes.

[Supreme Olajuwon]

If I jump off the top rope and hit you, I am totally fine.

If I jump off the top rope and miss you, I am seriously hurt.

You are the softest landing pad in the world.

[Aguakate]

"Ok, throw me against the ropes, I'll run back at you, do nothing at all, so you can lift me up and slam me down, or just kick me or something"

[edyhdrawde]

I don't understand why in NO DQ matches one guy doesn't just bring brass knuckles to the ring and knock the hell out of the other guy.

[FourFifty]

"Only one guy from Tough Enough gets a contract. You got that Miz? We clear on that JoMo? Understand random Diva?"

[loopydate]

JoMo won

[djoutcry]

im in love with this thread lol

[djoutcry]

I don't understand why in NO DQ matches one guy doesn't just bring brass knuckles to the ring and knock the hell out of the other guy.

+1

[Emperor Smeat]

"Only one guy from Tough Enough gets a contract. You got that Miz? We clear on that JoMo? Understand random Diva?"

Even works with NXT. Barrett wins season 1, next week everyone shows up on RAW and beats up people while only 1 guy getting "fired" and the other non-contracted wrestlers get away with assault.


Underneath the ring is not a floor but another area with its own hallways and rooms and for some strange reason also has a little people's courtroom.

[Aguakate]

"Ok, I'ma bodyslam you, and you stay there while I climb the ropes and hit you with a fying elbow, got it?"

[Lock Jaw]

"Stay down while I do THE WORM!!!!"

[Aguakate]

"Stay down while I do the People's Elbow!"

[JimmyMess]

knife edge chops...

[Nark Order]

You pulled the ropes down... MUST JUMP OVER THEM AND FALL TO THE OUTSIDE INSTEAD OF HITTING YOU.

[MoFo]

Getting put through a flimsy table does not KO you.

Maybe you get splinters in yr back, at worst.

[Rammsteinmad]

Kane setting people on fire, electrocuting them and almost killing people... and then a few weeks later getting cheers and support from the same people he attacked. :shifty:

[Xero]

Moves like the Canadian Destroyer and C4.

[dhellova guy]

I like how everyone talks about what they are gunna to in front of tv cameras backstage, and the announcers act like they didnt hear anything, but when those same cameras catch a fight backstage, they commentate it like its a match or something.

Also, they say things in front of the cameras and this information doesnt seem to get back to the person theyre talking about.

[Xero]

*Sin Cara grows about 5 inches*

Booker T: Well dawg, he looks bigger. He must have... Bulked up... While he was away rehabbing his injuries.

[Next Big Thing]

Undertaker having the power to disappear, control the lights, fog up the arena and release thunder bolts... except when he needs it the most.

http://thumbnails.hulu.com/14/850/63155_512x288_generated__eHqTkiFLsE+v6RAFrebWIw.jpg

http://joeyjojojr.tripod.com/mnkdbury.jpeg

http://justin-gabriel.com/img/albums/wwedotcom/digitals/ppv/2010/bragging%20rights/normal_BR10_Photo_095.jpg

[Xero]

Well, to be fair, it makes sense because he's down and weakened. He rarely uses his powers if he's not on the upper hand.

Though WWE basically admitting that he isn't paranormal by saying that he only "plays mind games" kind of under minds the entire concept. It would suggest that someone must be behind the scenes working with him to pull off these effects. So where are they in Taker's times of peril?

[Emperor Smeat]

*Sin Cara grows about 5 inches*

Booker T: Well dawg, he looks bigger. He must have... Bulked up... While he was away rehabbing his injuries.

Laughed a lot when Booker said it and the other commentators were quiet for a moment because they had no response to what he just said or were thinking how that was even possible.

[OldSchoolFan]

One me and my wife discussed the other night.
Wrestler X gets fired/suspended and decides to go see the next show and spends his hard earned money on a ring side seat, money that he no longer makes, yet decides to not go to his seat until the Main Event.

[OldSchoolFan]

Also in a no DQ match, why does the ref disarm people? Like Wrestler X- he is really an asshole as you can tell- brings a chair into the ring in a no DQ match and the ref rips it from his hands throws it out of the ring and mercilessly gives Wrestler X and very severe tongue lashing, not a good one either...

[Theo Dious]

Two men who hate each other so badly that they beat each other bloody every time they step into the ring together never seem to run across each other on the other side of the stage entrance.

[Theo Dious]

Also in a no DQ match, why does the ref disarm people? Like Wrestler X- he is really an asshole as you can tell- brings a chair into the ring in a no DQ match and the ref rips it from his hands throws it out of the ring and mercilessly gives Wrestler X and very severe tongue lashing, not a good one either...

This I believe is the difference between a "no DQ" match and a "street fight." In a no DQ match you can't be disqualified for using international objects, but it's technically still not allowed.

[KIRA]

I'm angry enough to kick your ass.....not before the show in the parking lot but

thats just insane but I will kick your ass in the ring....but not before my music cues up so that you know I'm kickin your ass



OMFG im draped on the middle rope Im too out of it to move lest rey complete the 619.

Of course the ref dosent hear that loud crack as the chair connects with your skull stupid.


Uh oh Christian is about to pull of the killswitch I better twist my body in perfect sync with him Also don't forget to not simply drop my arms

[Lock Jaw]

Or in John Morrison's case....

"You injured me a couple times... but we're cool... I'll say that I'm mad and want revenge, but you can tell I don't really mean it"

[MIZantine Empire]

another one of my favs, the sequence when cena is setting up the 5 knuckle shuffle, EVERY time its two shoulder blocks, wrestler x misses the clothesline and then sideslam for the set up. why not stop going for the clothesline? lol..

[Xero]

Or how about after the first shoulder block, you stay the fuck down and/or roll out of the ring?

[Nark Order]

Yeah tb1 and I go into a fit everytime it happens. We screams "DON'T SWING!!" at the top of our lungs like lunatics.

[XL]

Didn't Punk/Cena work that into their matches at MitB and SummerSlam?

[Xero]

Yeah, they worked a lot of the usual spots into the match in a smart way. Like when Cena was going for the five knuckle shuffle Punk kicked him in the face.

[Innovator]

The 5 knuckle shuffle has the ability to make the opponents stand up immediately and walk into an AA attempt.

[MoFo]

The 'putting somebody through a steel ladder' spot.

[Rammsteinmad]

Before the 5 Knuckle Shuffle, Cena's opponent is motionless from that Slam he does. Why not pin them then? Since they're 'dead'.

[Innovator]

When you hear Kofi yelling BOOM, clapping his hands, it's best to turn around.

[Lock Jaw]

If you get thrown out of the ring in a triple threat match, you are dead for at least a few minutes.

[Rammsteinmad]

That small people like Shawn Michaels and Rey Mysterio could hold World Championships whilst people like Mark Henry couldn't (until now).

[Innovator]

-Kelly Kelly runs the ropes.

[Lock Jaw]

I just noticed that the other day. How Kelly can't really run the ropes. Hugh Jackman did a better job. :shifty:

http://i.imgur.com/22duC.gif

[MIZantine Empire]

The 'putting somebody through a steel ladder' spot.
lol or how they just lay on the table waiting to be "splashed" through it. i like when they go to do a superplex, for one, it hurts both equally, and two, the other guy who is getting superplexed always stands up to help make the other guy do the move, lol

[Aguakate]

That small people like Shawn Michaels and Rey Mysterio could hold World Championships whilst people like Mark Henry couldn't (until now).

I don't necessarily agree, but Rey Mysterio pinning Kevin Nash back in WCW WAS horrible.

[Fox]

People who have never used a powerbomb before, as in NEVER in their entire careers, deciding that it's a good idea to use one in a match against Billy Kidman (WCW fans will get this).

Also, deciding to attempt a running, leaping clothesline on Samoa Joe when he's in the corner, even though it's been proven countless times that it's a bad bad bad idea.

[Kapoutman]

When Hogan jumps in the air, falls down and smashes his tailbone against the mat, it won't hurt him if his leg touches someone's throat. He will totally feel it if you move out of the way though.

[Innovator]

-It's always a wise move to be hunched over while Cena climbs to the top rope.

-Headscissors/Frankensteiners always flip you over, except for when you wrestle Rey Mysterio.

-If in WCW, you could make matches as long as you yelled "I'm calling the shots around here!"

[Aguakate]

"Ok, if you bodyslam me before climbing to the top rope before hitting me with a flying elbow or some other flying move, don't worry...if I don't land 'right', I'll just adjust my body so you can correctly hit me with your move".

[Rammsteinmad]

People who have never used a powerbomb before, as in NEVER in their entire careers, deciding that it's a good idea to use one in a match against Billy Kidman (WCW fans will get this).

Being a dumb kid at the time, I use to mark out everytime Kidman did this.

[Rammsteinmad]

Oh here's one:

If me and a group of friends 'invade' WWE shows every week, jumping the guard rail and attacking WWE personnel, we will eventually get offered contracts.

[RiX1024]

Agreed never attempt to Powerbomb Kidman, lol.

[Volare]

Concrette isn't as hard as it used to be so DDT's and such won't work as well.

[DaVe]

If someone does their finishing move to you, you are immediately knocked unconscious, except if someone else wants to do their finisher as well. In this case, you spring back to your feet and walk into them.

[XL]

That's a great one.

[Volare]

If you look like a clone of Batista, you will make it to the WWE.

[Next Big Thing]

This might not exactly fit, but I've always found it funny that Justin Gabriel would continue to do the 450 Splash even though it seems to temporarily give him bruised ribs immediately after. Same with Benoit doing his diving headbutt every match and then flopping around in agony like an electrocuted fish.

[Next Big Thing]

Forget that there was ever a higher power instructing Nexus or a "real reason" why they attacked the Undertaker in that buried alive match.

[Volare]

Kane said he would rape them all with butt sex if they didn't help him.

[Nark Order]

This might not exactly fit, but I've always found it funny that Justin Gabriel would continue to do the 450 Splash even though it seems to temporarily give him bruised ribs immediately after. Same with Benoit doing his diving headbutt every match and then flopping around in agony like an electrocuted fish.

This reminds me of a ridiculous kayfabe fallacy involving Benoit and Supreme kind of alluded to something similar before. If Benoit put a chair or weapon on a guy's face before he did the flying headbutt then the guy taking the move would writhe in pain or get knocked unconscious. If Benoit goes for the headbutt and the guy on bottom unexpectedly lifts a chair or a weapon up for Benoit to hit, Benoit writhes in pain or gets knocked unconscious.

[What Would Kevin Do?]

Agreed never attempt to Powerbomb Kidman, lol.

Also, never attempt a sunset flip on Rey Mysterio.

[KaosDarksol]

If you look like a clone of Batista, you will make it to the WWE.

If you look like a clone of Batista you will do nothing significant in the wwe

[Mr. Nerfect]

If I jump off the top rope and hit you, I am totally fine.

If I jump off the top rope and miss you, I am seriously hurt.

You are the softest landing pad in the world.

This is my favourite, too. Kapoutman also mentioned the leg drop. There's also the front dropkick once you've sent your opponent off the ropes, but they hold on and you crash and burn.

Well, to be fair, it makes sense because he's down and weakened. He rarely uses his powers if he's not on the upper hand.

Though WWE basically admitting that he isn't paranormal by saying that he only "plays mind games" kind of under minds the entire concept. It would suggest that someone must be behind the scenes working with him to pull off these effects. So where are they in Taker's times of peril?

I really want to see a segment where The Undertaker is chilling out with the dude who does his lights and stuff. Perhaps even a tag team, with Taker's best friend special effects dude taking the heat and then hot-tagging out to Taker.

And, as people mentioned: It really bothers me when the guys on the show apparently don't have a clue what happened. A tag guy will accidentally hit his partner with a steel chair, and instead of watching the tape and seeing that it was clearly an accident, the partner will be all pissed off the next week.

On NXT at the moment, you have Derrick Bateman and Maxine announcing in front of a camera that they want to break up AJ and Hornswoggle, and yet AJ and Hornswoggle don't seem too aware. I guess it goes to show no one really watches NXT...

Silly referees annoy me, too. That tag team match thing, where the face getting beaten up will eventually make the hot tag and the ref doesn't see it -- but then the heels repeatedly sneak in and out without tags being seen? Come on. I have seen the ref occasionally make them tag when he doesn't see it, though. But it still happens.

Also, when a guy goes from being a heel to a face, not only will his whole personally change, and he'll suddenly start liking the fans and all that; but his ring style will also change. Suddenly he no longer controls the pace of his matches, but finds himself in countless chinlocks and using the fans to get back to his feet.

[LewisTheTruest]

This might not exactly fit, but I've always found it funny that Justin Gabriel would continue to do the 450 Splash even though it seems to temporarily give him bruised ribs immediately after. Same with Benoit doing his diving headbutt every match and then flopping around in agony like an electrocuted fish.

I hate to be 'that guy' but Benoit's headbutts must've contributed to...ya know... Ribs not so much. RVD has been doin' it forever.

[Rammsteinmad]

And, as people mentioned: It really bothers me when the guys on the show apparently don't have a clue what happened. A tag guy will accidentally hit his partner with a steel chair, and instead of watching the tape and seeing that it was clearly an accident, the partner will be all pissed off the next week.

[Rammsteinmad]

Also, when a guy goes from being a heel to a face, not only will his whole personally change, and he'll suddenly start liking the fans and all that; but his ring style will also change. Suddenly he no longer controls the pace of his matches, but finds himself in countless chinlocks and using the fans to get back to his feet.

I like that so far, Sheamus hasn't done this yet. I guess with the exception of Mark Henry which is understandable.

[LewisTheTruest]

This is my favourite, too. Kapoutman also mentioned the leg drop. There's also the front dropkick once you've sent your opponent off the ropes, but they hold on and you crash and burn.



I really want to see a segment where The Undertaker is chilling out with the dude who does his lights and stuff. Perhaps even a tag team, with Taker's best friend special effects dude taking the heat and then hot-tagging out to Taker.

And, as people mentioned: It really bothers me when the guys on the show apparently don't have a clue what happened. A tag guy will accidentally hit his partner with a steel chair, and instead of watching the tape and seeing that it was clearly an accident, the partner will be all pissed off the next week.

On NXT at the moment, you have Derrick Bateman and Maxine announcing in front of a camera that they want to break up AJ and Hornswoggle, and yet AJ and Hornswoggle don't seem too aware. I guess it goes to show no one really watches NXT...

Silly referees annoy me, too. That tag team match thing, where the face getting beaten up will eventually make the hot tag and the ref doesn't see it -- but then the heels repeatedly sneak in and out without tags being seen? Come on. I have seen the ref occasionally make them tag when he doesn't see it, though. But it still happens.

Also, when a guy goes from being a heel to a face, not only will his whole personally change, and he'll suddenly start liking the fans and all that; but his ring style will also change. Suddenly he no longer controls the pace of his matches, but finds himself in countless chinlocks and using the fans to get back to his feet.


Taker: Hey idiot I'm face again, change my theme is back to the original orchestra one now. Not the Ministry or Attiitude Era and if you play and anything by Kid Rock or Limp Bizkit I will tombstone yo ass into that mixer.

Sound Guy: I just press the buttons dude.

Taker: Fine now about the lighting.

Sound Guy: The whole lighting thing is in ur court.

Taker: Really? Shit!

*waits for a Taker It Easy sticker.*

[bigslimjj]

Concrette isn't as hard as it used to be so DDT's and such won't work as well.Fucking Cena :nono:

[bigslimjj]

"You've been beating me relentlessly for ten or so minutes. But wait the fans are cheering me on,so I take their cue and begin waiving my hand and finger at them,which makes them cheer more. This in turn gives me a crystal meth/roids type rush which makes my body forget the thrashing it's been taking, for longer then any real fighter could withstand. My body starts to shake uncontrollably...making you shit your panties and release me from your little headlock and or choke hold. The rush is so great that you begin LITTERALLY SHAKING IN YOUR BOOTS and when I point at you, you put up your hands and beg for mercy. Even though I haven't gotten in ANY offense in ten minutes. After three punches, a boot, and a legdrop you are roadkill. I go on to the next town. As long as it's not Battle Creek or some other "B" town brother. I don't do the "B" towns dude!