WWE SmackDOWN! Captions [5-6-2004] [Archive]

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Corkscrewed

05-07-2004, 01:02 AM

I'll do some later. I'm marking out to the Undertaker making his awesome cowboy entrance. ;)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg

El Santo

05-07-2004, 01:07 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

For one night, we should all salute Mrs. Guerrero, a brave woman who must live with the pain of a rosebush growing out her left shoulder.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Bradshaw, ever the Republican, schocks Mrs. Guerrero with his radical proposal to eliminate medicare.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

Cena knew he was screwed when, mid-promo, he was surrounded by an army of WWE logos!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

Chavo knew he was going to do one of the most horrendous jobs in WWE history, so, what the hell, might as well cop a feel while there was still a chance.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

Fans breathed a sigh of relief when it was discovered the new Cruiserweight Champ was really Booker T in drag.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

Nunzio: "Hey, dumbass, Barry Sanders was #20! NUMBER TWENTY!!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

It was a dark day in television history when Thing decided to don full bondage gear.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

Nobody was more hardcore with "Got Your Nose" than Dawn Marie.

AareDub

05-07-2004, 01:16 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg
Eddie Guerrero welcomes Elton John, the first competitor in tonights main event.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
It wasn't long before the first challenger, Garth Brooks, made his way into the ring.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg
The match never got fully started as Elton had a heart attack when realizing his red sunglasses didn't match his purple pants.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg
It's a shame the match ended early. Eminem got there a few minutes late and missed the whole thing.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg
Chavo: Yo Rey, I knew you'd be different without the mask, but DAMN!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg
As the camera scanned the crowd they found the big crazy guy who was the biggest FBI fan ever!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
This one doesn't even need a caption. Look at his tongue, look at the refs ass!!! It writes itself! Sometimes I think the WWE puts the most awkward pics up there on purpose. Maybe they know we're gonna do captions :shifty:

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg
Vince: Okay, raise your hand if you liked the narcolepsy angle...

Yea, Ok. These sucked, oh well.

M-A-G

05-07-2004, 01:31 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

Eddie's standards of what a "mamacita" should be were getting too literal.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Bradshaw, ever the charity worker, performed an eyesight exam before allowing the elderly to drive home.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg

Mrs. Guerrero was unfortunately frozen during mid-Macarena.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

Cena was out to promote the effectiveness of his 'Hookt on Phonix' program.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg

Cena: "Don't go into the light!!! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!!!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg

Winning a match was all well and good but dammit, that spinach stuck in his teeth was too annoying for Cena.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

"Jesus, where the *&@% have you been?!?!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

Chavo thought he had the whole "Latino Heat" schtick down and was on his way to landing a "mamacita".....

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg

....but premature ejaculation can really ruin things.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg

"I swear, that's never happened to me before!!!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

Jackie thought it was only apropos to win the belt seeing as it held as much value as the Women's title.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg

Johnny the Bull struggled to remember where he had left his hygeine bag while Nunzio pondered where that mysterious odor was eminating from.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg

'Taker, Texas Ranger was on the case again, this time hunting for a criminal in a late night rave party.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg

Hoping to remain inconspicuous, 'Taker, Texas Ranger struck up a dance as cover.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

Undertaker: Do you see him?
Nunzio: No, but damned if not gonna try getting THAT chick's number.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg

Even undead zombies had to wretch at the foul stench that poured out of Johnny the Bull.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg

The odor was getting so hideous and nauseating, 'Taker looked to vomit all over the place.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

After a long, hard day on the job, 'Taker, Texas Ranger asks for a cold one.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg

Torrie looked to entertain the crowd with an impromptu game of cherades.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

Dawn: Hah! I got you now, Triple H! I'm going to expose you for the fraud you are!!!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg

Rene was puzzled as to what the hell Torrie was trying to act out for him.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg

Dupree: Jesus, everyone's laying on the floor, hands sprawled out...what kind of game is this?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg

And really, who wouldn't be jealous of a penis shaped like John Cena?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg

Dupree: Hah! Found you!
Cena: Dammit. OK, now you go hide.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg

Bubba: Maybe if I stay really, really still, he won't see me....

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg

It was so sad to see two guys dedicated to training and keeping their diet in check fight over a piece of chocolate on the ground.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg

Rey: Ref, how many fingers am I holding up?
Referee: Uh, you're the one that's messed up right now.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg

In an ironic twist, Eddie laid out Bubba and RVD for fighting over the chocolate with the biggest Nestle Crunch in the world.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg

"It's MY chocolate! MINE!!!"

Gone Mad

05-07-2004, 01:42 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
Bradshaw: Ma'am.. this is played-out, but.. you're a homo!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg
Bashem: AHHHH!!!

Cena: That's right! Watch the finale of "Frasier" and like it!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg
Chavo: Ol' Pepe! NO!

(shotgun blast!)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg
UT: My match is after RVD's again why?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg
Dawn: Let's see who you really are... ... um, sorry about the mix-up... though I don't know if your right eye can be put back in its place..

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg
Worst.. Wheelbarrow..Ever.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg
Eddie: UM... I didn't do it... (drops chair then runs like hell)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg
Stamboli: Man, what a horrible show.

Nunzio: Yeah. Jackie wins the CW title, Bradshaw beats up a broad, Booker meets up with Miss Cleo.. Oh well, here comes Taker..

Stamboli: Assume the positions.
( lays flat on the mat)

CBright7831

05-07-2004, 01:47 AM

Yea, Ok. These sucked, oh well.
They sure did. I suggest letting people who are actually funny do them next time.

Corkscrewed

05-07-2004, 02:11 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg
Mrs. Guerrero was quite touched by her son's thought and care, but Christmas had passed nearly half a year ago.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
I'll forgo the obvious caption and do a modification...
Try as he might, Bradshaw could not convince Mrs. Guerrero that he was really Eric Estrada from CHiPs.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg
Victim #29,453 to Bradshaw's long, drawn out promos.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg
It occurred to Cena that going for the cheap pop by saying something good about the home team didn't work too well when the team just finished last place in their conference.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg
Cena was definitely one of the rougher head transplant surgeons.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg
Doug knew the only way he could possibly get out of this was to pants Cena, but he was even more frightened by what he saw afterwards...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg
Chavo: "What? You mean you have tapes of me and Steph? And you want WHAT in return for keeping them secret? *sigh* Fine..."

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg
Chavo figured no one would EVER find his Cruiserweight push if he shoved it up his ass, but he didn't factor in Jacqueline's resourcefulness.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg
Chavo didn't like how Jacqueline had been taking blow job lessons from Lita.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg
Chavo was quite emotional as he saw the credibility of the entire Cruiserweight Division burn down to the ground.

OR

Little Chavo was devasted when it was revealed that Santa wasn't real.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg
"Hahaahaha!! I'm taking the Cruiserweight Title to Triple H, and you'll never see it again!!!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg
"...awwwww crap."

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg
The McCowboy Express was here, and no one, not Burger King, not no one, was going to stop them!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg
That was the bad thing about this new Undertaker. He didn't sell your hugs either.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg
After his Deadman gimmick fell apart, Undertaker took a job acting as Glass Ceiling Security Guard.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg
Stamboli: "Aw crap, not another Tomb-- wait, is that a Big Mac? What the heck do you and Bearer do, Mark???"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
In charge of monitoring homosexuality levels in the ring, the ref's job was about to get a LOT crazier.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg
Here we see a rare shot of the wrestlers in midcard hell groping for any sign of hope.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg
Ever the multitasker, Torrie Wilson was able to strike a sexy pose and poke the eyes out of a lecherous Steven Richards at the same time.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg
Dawn: "That's not Torrie Wilson! That's a MAN, man!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg
Dupre: *moments after pulling his trunks back up* "Torrie, are zyou all right? I told zyou it can poke en eye out!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg
"Massively popular upper midcarders don't just fall out of ze sky! Aw crap, I should have caught him, no?"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg
The irate DupreeCentaur demanded to know who had screwed up the torso surgery.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg
Internet smarks rejoiced everywhere when Dupree interjected himself into a WWE storyline meeting and took out the entire writing staff.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg
Against a much skinnier but still lethal Bam Bam Bigelow, would the Double Dragons triumph this time?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg
The team of Bubba Ray and Rob Van Dam didn't fare so well in the first-ever WWE Wheelbarrow Race.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg
D-Von had the pygmy secured, and now it was up to Hebner to bore him with pointless stories about his father until he passed out!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg
When all was said and done, Eddie stood tall in the Chair Bong Smoking Contest.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg
"You don't bring in that week marijuana stuff in here! I've smoked pure Columbian Cocaine, dammit! I'm Eddie Guerrero, BITCH!"

Corkscrewed

05-07-2004, 02:17 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg
Katie Vick was back with a vengeance, and one was going to stop her! Not Triple H, not the Undertaker, not Kane's incredible cuningilus, NO ONE.

Corkscrewed

05-07-2004, 02:22 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg
Bubba: "Dammit, why the heck are your boots so tight? Have you been hanging out with Rhyno again???
RVD: "Nah, since I keep my stash in there, I gotta make the shoes unremovable so the narcs don't catch me."
Bubba: "Niiiiiiice."

Vastardikai

05-07-2004, 05:34 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

Eddie: Meet my Mamacita, Holmes! Her name is Rose, ese!

Mamacita: Actually, my name is Sharon.

Eddie: But, Mamacita, doesn't a Rose by any other name smell as sweet, ese?

Mamacita: :love:

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Bradshaw's heel acts stoop to a new low when he introduces himself to Mama Guerrero... WITHOUT PANTS ON!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg

Eddie: My Mamacita just fainted, holmes.

And the beginning of Eddie's JR syndrome is seen by all...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

John Cena halts mid freestyle:

John: Does anybody know a word that rhymes with Orange?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg

Basham: Nothing Rhymes with Orange, you dolt!

John: Take it back!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg

Try as he might, John couldn't get a word that rhymes with Orange out of the Basham.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

Chavo: Puppies!

He then realizes that Eddie not only gets the big pushes, but also the cool diseases...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

Jacqueline is the only diva known to cause blue lower torso and Legs.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg

Where will you be when your diahrrea comes back?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg

jobbing to Jacqueline is bad enough, but did he have to go down on Stevie Richards, too?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

Jacqueline holds the cruiserweight title high, oblivious to the fact that she has to face the Big Show next week!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg

The FBI was disgusted by the fact that their diet wasn't Atkins friendly.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg

Van Helsing enters the dark church, wondering who turned out the lights.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg

It didn't, however, take long before he found the switch.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

He then holds up a sign of his favorite Government agency.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg

after that, he showed the recent direction of Donald Rumsfeld's Political Career

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg

The latest Iraqi Prison Abuse picture was the most disturbing of all...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

seconds later, the zombie's hand turned into a peace sign, showing that it was anti-war.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg

Lesson number 2 to Vince: Never play Beegees songs when Torrie is in the ring.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

Sometimes, it takes drastic measures to help someone get over their eating disorder.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg

Rene: Need another Croissant?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg

Rene's "JBL on the mic" Impression works everytime.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg

John Cena needs comforting when he learns that, in fact, NOTHING rhymes with Orange.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg

Rene: poor guy you need some sleep. Here's a blanket. Sleep tight, big guy.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg

A few seconds later, Brian Hebner tried to come into between them, only to be knocked out by the plate glass window they were carrying.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg

RVD: Save me from the Chicken Legs, Save me from the... ARGH THEY GOT ME!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg

Rey taps, not even HE can escape the brutal double team Story Time submission.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg

Eddie: DAMN THAT STONE COLD! DAMN HIM STRAIGHT TO HELL! I need my medicine, JR syndrome is getting out of control

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg

Eddie: BAHGAWDUNPRETTIERBARBEQUESAUCE!!!! I must control the urges.... I can't let them get the b...b...BAHGAWDSTUNNERSTONECOLDMAYGODHAVEMERCYONOURWWESOULS!!!!!

big_bluto

05-07-2004, 06:24 AM

Kind of lacking inspiration this week, but here goes anyway....

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg
Chavo: STEPH SENT YOU OUT HERE TO DO WHAT!?!?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg
Jacquelines new finishing move - 'Milk The Chavito'

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg
Voiceover:
And following the HHH mould, we see Jacqueline sporting a title which both devalues the cruiserweights, reduces any credibility the writers may have had, and provides inspiration to other wrestlers that no longer is HHH the only person who can bury 10 wrestlers in a night.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg
Johnny: Jacqueline with the title? That's a sodding travesty!
Nunzio: When did you get allowed to talk?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg
ATOMIC WEDGIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg
Another succesful finishing move from 'The Oral Monster'

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
Cole: 1....2......3!! And Oral Monster wins with a gay pin.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg
Dawn-Marie: You f*ckin bitch! It was you that posted those photo's of me on TPWW!
Torrie: No, no, no, it wasn't me!
Dawn-Marie: It WAS you! And you didn't even have the decency to post up decent quality jpegs!
Torrie: It wasn't me, I swear!
Dawn-Marie: As if that wasn't enough, you cheap slutty bint, you didn't even have the common courtesy to airbrush my tits up!
Torrie: Take it from me - it's not worth it!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg
Cena paid for his prank, after Rene beat the piss out of him.
What did he expect after dipping Rene's head in a bucket of white paint?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg
Rene: My hair eees stupeed, yes?
Crowd: STUPID HAIR! STUPID HAIR!
http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg
Rene decided that covering John in the remains of the announcers table was suitable punishment for making him look like a gay icon.

big_bluto

05-07-2004, 08:10 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg
MOM: Well, they can stop following you right now. Now, stop following my son! You ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
AUDIENCE:
The Messiah! The Messiah! Show us the Messiah!
MOM:
The who?
AUDIENCE:
The Messiah!
MOM:
Huh, there's no Messiah in here. There's a mess, all right, but no Messiah. Now, go away!
AUDIENCE:
Eddie! Eddie!
MOM:
Right, my lad. What have you been up to?
EDDIE:
Nothing, Mum. Um--
MOM:
Come on. Out with it.
EDDIE:
Well, they think I'm the Messiah, Mum.
[smack]
MOM:
Now, what have you been telling them?
EDDIE:
Nothing! I only--
MOM:
You're only making it worse for yourself.
EDDIE:
Look! I can explain! I--
[smack]
JBL:
No! Let me explain, Mrs. Guerrero!
MOM:
Who--
http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
JBL:
Your son is a born leader. Those people out there are following him because they believe in him, Mrs. Guerrero. They believe he can give them hope-- hope of a new life, a new world, a better future!
MOM:
Who's that?!
EDDIE:
Oh! That's... JBL, Mum. JBL. Mother. Hmm.
[smack]
Aaaah!
AUDIENCE:
The Messiah! The Messiah!
MOM:
Ooooh.
AUDIENCE:
Show us the Messiah! The Messiah! The Messiah! Show us the Messiah!
MOM:
Now, you listen here! He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy! Now, go away!

Easy rep for reference!

Azriel

05-07-2004, 08:56 AM

Ah, WWE does Life of Brian. Intriguing

big_bluto

05-07-2004, 08:58 AM

Ah, WWE does Life of Brian. Intriguing
Rep for that man!

AareDub

05-07-2004, 10:21 AM

They sure did. I suggest letting people who are actually funny do them next time.

F'ck off noob. It's not my fault that you're pissed off because I gave you a negative rep. Oh, I guess it is my fault. F'ck off anyway.

Blue Demon

05-07-2004, 10:35 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg
Stevie: That's not your mother....that's a clown man!
Eddie: Stevie...that's my mother you're talkign about!

Rock Bottom

05-07-2004, 10:41 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg
Eddie Guerrero: Heyyyyyyy mamacita!

Impaired Judgment. Another sign of hunger.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
Bradshaw: THAT'S RIGHT. Not only are you a homo, but I AM getting a main event push.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg
And apparently, Bradshaw's push was too much for this long time WWE fan to handle.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg
Cena had a problem, he wore so many Jerseys in cheap attempts to please the crowds that he forgot the name of this town's team...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg
Steven Richards: Here comes the chu-chu train! (Starts moving a spoonful of medicine around in circles)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg
Cena: God damnit Lt. Dan, you are on my last nerves. Maybe I will leave you out here to die, you unappreciative asshole.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg
Chavo: Hahaha! Yeah right. Take my Cruiserweight Title? The WWE would never put that belt on a black person!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg
After telling Jackie he hid chocolates in his jock, Chavo reaped the benefits.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg
Where will you be when your constipation acts up and you're in the middle of being buried by a Diva?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg
Chavo: What! Someone tell me what the fuc</>k is going on!
Ref: Well, Chavo... She pinned ya... Therefore, she is the new champ.
Chavo: What!? You can pin someone to take their title?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg
Congratulations to Jacqueline, the WWE Boobyweight Champion!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg
Stamboli: They're actually... Crucifying him? ...Nunzio... Did *we* do that? :(
Nunzio: Ah, I never thought of that.
Stamboli: What? That Jews killed Jesus?
Nunzio: Oh, no. Crucifying someone as opposed to breaking their kneecaps with a baseball cat. *Slaps him in the back of the head*

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg
(8)Oompa, Loompa, Doompity-Doo, I've got a Texas Ranger for you(8)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg
The referee and The Undertaker played themselves a little guessing game.

Undertaker: (Chokeslamming The Bull)
(Referee begins urinating all over the ring as seen in the TitanTron)
Undertaker: (Last Ride on Nunzio) The FBI's credibility!
Referee: Correct!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg
Undertaker: Do you see him?
Nunzio: No, not in sight.
Undertaker: I guess they released him, I was going to bury him. But since he's gone, you'll do nicely. (SLAM.)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg
The Bull: *Farts*
Undertaker: ...Not cool, man. *Pisses himself*
The Bull: $&*^$&%$#%&#$&$#^
Undertaker: Fuc</>ker.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
(A few minutes after this picture took place)
Ref: Whew, that was a hell of an orgy. That Richards really can pound!
Undertaker: Pfft, you should have seen what I was doing to his wife!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg
RVD: Whoa... Dude... Check out my hand... Check out the trails...
Vince: RVD, I'm talking to you damnit! Are you on drugs!?
RVD: Haha, it's cool man...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg
Torrie: (8)I know! That backwards is the only way my fart, will goooooooo...(8)
Guy in front row: Ohhhhh yeah. (Readies nostrils)

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg
When Vince told Torrie that they usually took care of operations to boost a Diva's "charisma," she went ahead and ordered herself a nosejob. Boy did she regret it.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg
Rene: Zat will teach you to wear ze same colors as me to a party, you beetch!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg
Cena: No! Leave me with my men! I'm supposed to die out here! With honor!
Rene: Whot ze fook...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg
John Cena: French Tickler.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/24.jpg
Apparently, Cena made the mistake of challenging God to a match.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg
RVD: Ok, which one of you am I supposed to fight? The guy in blue, the guy in yellow camo, or the little guy with the big nose and the pipe?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg
RVD: Ok, now on the count of three, I'm gonna release all the smoke I inhaled, straight out of my butt... It'll get you stoned like hell... One... Two...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg
RVD: Hey... That Abe Lincoln guy on this penny just winked at me...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg
Ref: Rey, how many fingers am I holding up?
Rey: Quatro.
Ref: Wow, that's not even a number, you moron.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg
After waking up from crashing at RVD's party, Eddie was alarmed to realize that he was half naked, holding a folding chair, and was the WWE Champion.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg
Eddie: They're out to get me...
Belty: Yessssss... YESSSSS... They're all out to get you. Especially that timekeeper guy... You notice the way he holds me during our matches?
Eddie: Must... Kill... Timekeeper.

big_bluto

05-07-2004, 10:57 AM

[IMG]http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg
The Bull: *Farts*
Undertaker: ...Not cool, man. *Pisses himself*
The Bull: $&*^$&%$#%&#$&$#^
Undertaker: Fuc</>ker.

Quality! :y: :rofl:

Lamuella

05-07-2004, 01:16 PM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

"To continue the family tradition, esse, tonight my mother is dressed as the Gobbledy Gooker!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Mama Guererro gasped as she was transformed by JBL's demonic Shrinking Ray

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg

"Mmmm, nice pants!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

Cena realised that beating up the little WWE symbol had been a mistake when he came back with his two big brothers and a Frost Giant.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg

Position 466: the "Guess Who?"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg

Cena's powers had been boosted when his DNA had been spliced with that of a chipmunk.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

Chavo's impersonation of Charlie Chan did not go down well

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

Because of a remarkably twisted upbringing, Chavo could no only achieve orgasm with a woman's head inserted into his rectum.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg

Tragedy struck. Chavo didn't realise that Jacqueline had been wearing earrings.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg

The Invisible Man watched the footage from home, cursing. His perfect chance, and he had to have the damn flu!

OR

Chavo still couldn't believe it wasn't butter

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

If you listen carefully, you can actually hear the wet smack as the cruiserweight title's credibility hits rock bottom.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg

"Hey, can anyone pull this logo off my thigh?"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg

The fat kid in the suit looked solemn, but inside he cackled with glee. When the hired muscle was finished with them, those bullies would regret the day they called him Lardass.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

His navy training did not let him down. As Nunzio was hoisted in the air, he saw an admiral in the crowd, and snapped off a textbook salute.

OR

With 'taker's help, Nunzio could see right into the sorority shower room. These photos would turn out great!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg

"Johnny, if you pull a Sid on me, I swear to god I'll rip your heart out"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg

The Invisible Man got there just in time for the 3-way

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

The newcomer gave a hearty two finger salute to whoever had given him this crappy gimmick.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg

After being hit on the head once too often, Torrie earnestly believed that she was a little teapot, short and stout.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

Having found Torrie's handle, Dawn Marie went on a search for her spout.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/21.jpg

The Invisible Man and his brother double-teamed Renee and Torrie.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/22.jpg

"John? John? Are you- oh crap! I'll check his pulse! Someone get a doctor!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/23.jpg

Renee Dupree proved his boast that "My penis is so big it has to wear jeans!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg

As the ref watched the pink dragon grow out of RVD's face, he opined that he shouldn't have accepted a drink from Jake Roberts.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/26.jpg

With the match on hold as the ref tried to brush invisible maggots off his legs, RVD asked Bubba to help him do a handstand.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/27.jpg

REY: The lobsters! The terrible purple lobsters!
REF: Took a drink from Jake?
D-VON: Yup.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/28.jpg

"Stoners from battle creek don't just all out of the sky, you know!"

*THUD*

"Beautiful big tittied women don't just fall out of the sky, you know!"

*pause*

"Dammit!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/29.jpg

The WWE logo was remarkably good at hide-and-seek. Eddy would never look behind the ring rope.

tucsonspeed6

05-07-2004, 02:26 PM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

Rosie Palmer discovers S&M...

loopydate

05-07-2004, 07:49 PM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/01.jpg

Goddamn, Mrs. Guerrero looks like my grandma...

Mrs. Guerrero loved her son's new "Turn your head and COUGH, invisible homes!" catchphrase.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Mrs. Guerrero couldn't believe it. What he was saying was true. It all makes sense now! The lack of satisfaction from her marriage, her love of "Wild Things," her fixation with Gina Gershon...

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/03.jpg

Stevie Richards - CPR Expert tried his best to revive Mrs. Guerrero.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg

Cena froze. He knew he had a catchphrase, but he couldn't remember what it was. WWE was flashing it on the TitanTron, one letter at a time, but he couldn't exactly turn around without giving away that he'd forgotten it. What to do? What to do?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg

The answer was clear. No, Doug didn't want to hear the most annoying sound in the world.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/06.jpg

CENA: SOMETHIN' BIT ME!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg

Before the festivities began, Jackie needed a quick tutorial.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

She's a fast learner. I'll give her that.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/09.jpg

When Stevie tried to get him some, Jackie dealt with matters the American way!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg

Chavo couldn't believe it. Not only had he lost his Cruiserweight Title, but Vince had come to collect on that "I'd rather lose my right leg below the knee than lose my Cruiserweight Title" remark.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/11.jpg

Somewhere, Madusa smiled. And a mirror shattered.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/12.jpg

The FBI has the same reaction to tonight's booking as everyone else.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/13.jpg

TAKER: Paul, what's that smoke? You didn't...
PAUL: OHHHHH, YEEEEES!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/14.jpg

It was at this moment, that Shooter knew he was f</>ucked.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

TAKER: This will teach you to demean Native American heritage!
NUNZIO: How?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/16.jpg

JOHNNY: Dude, do you even OWN soap?

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg

TAKER: Somebody had to get the ref out of the ring. Then I noticed he was sitting on his sweet can. So I licked his sweet can. Ohhhh, just thinking about his can, I wish I had his sweet, sweet, s-s-s-sweet can.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

VOICE: I'm... not... telling... you... anything... you... didn't... already... know!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/19.jpg

Uh-oh...Torrie's getting all steamed up.[/QUOTE]

More later. I gotta go.

loopydate

05-07-2004, 07:49 PM

BigDaddyCool

05-08-2004, 03:08 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg
Crap, Thing is back and he is pissed.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/10.jpg
Chavo doing his Kevin Nash impression: aaaaaaaaaa! My quad!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
Bradsaw: Look, you made me eat all that Mexican food, now pull my finger before I explode!

Hired Hitman

05-08-2004, 03:57 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg

... priceless

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

Dammit, If undertaker should have came back that way :mad:

PorkSoda

05-08-2004, 09:32 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

(Moments Before): John Connor: NO DON'T DO IT PLEASE DON'T GO!
Undertaker: I haf go' way John!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg

Mrs. Bush and the rest of the house stared in confusion, why a cowboy in his underwear and a Nike sports jacket would be at the election.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/15.jpg

Disney World's new Ferris Wheel did not go over too well.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/20.jpg

Dawn: Come on, Torrie Worrie! Open your mouthy for the Choo Choo Train!
Torrie: I WANT SPAGHETTI!

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/25.jpg

Bubba told RVD he knew Tai Boe causing RVD to back off a bit, but once Bubba stuck his foot out for a spin kick, he tore his quad.

thuganomicalcrippler

05-08-2004, 09:37 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/02.jpg
Here we see Bush Sr. yelling at Mr. Rumsfeld for neglecting his carbohydrates.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/04.jpg
WWE even projected a cue card on to John's body, but hes till couldn't remember the city's name and get the cheap pop.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/05.jpg
"YOU WILL WATCH GIGLI!"

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/07.jpg
J-Lo: "I have received inside information that there is someone in this building who is refusing to watch my movie!"
Chavo: Right. I'll help you find him.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/08.jpg
Chavo: "First, we try between my legs."
J-Lo: "Nope, no one here."
Chavo: "Keep looking anyway. Something's bound to turn up."

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
Hey Taker, want a cucumber?

I am dreadfully sorry for inflicting this misery upon you.

Edit: Sorry, It was RAW that was held in Phoenix, so the John Cena Caption is null and void.

Corkscrewed

05-09-2004, 03:12 AM

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/17.jpg
TAKER: Somebody had to get the ref out of the ring. Then I noticed he was sitting on his sweet can. So I licked his sweet can. Ohhhh, just thinking about his can, I wish I had his sweet, sweet, s-s-s-sweet can.

http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/050604/images/18.jpg

VOICE: I'm... not... telling... you... anything... you... didn't... already... know!

ROTFLMAO!!! Those are the best I've seen from you in a LONG time, especially the Sean O'Haire one. That might very well be the second O'Haire-related Caption of the Month! :rofl: (Golden Box)