WWE Monday Night Raw: Memorial Day edition

[owenbrown]

Since there isn't one...

Tonight so far...


An update on Triple H's condition after last week...


and John Cena responds to Ryback's challenge...

[Heisenberg]

Didn't feel like Monday at all today, motherfuckin' RAW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lock Jaw]

Is this Keith David doing the opening VO?

[Immortal Moose]

Gonna be a slow night.

[Lock Jaw]

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20070617162317/gargoyles/images/4/4e/Goliath.jpg

[owenbrown]

could be....sounds like his voice

[owenbrown]

why is Raw in Canada on Memorial Day though? :wtf:

[Lock Jaw]

Monday Night Raw Thread Featuring Keith David

[Lock Jaw]

http://static.tvgcdn.net/MediaBin/Galleries/Shows/A_F/Ca_Ce/Cape_The/1/the-cape-9.jpg

[Corndad]

Cena Camera Swoop and we are off...

[Lock Jaw]

Seems quiet for a Canadian crowd

[ClockShot]

Screw Cena.

I'M HERE FOR MIKE MCGULLI...........uh, I mean, CUR-TIS AX-EL!

[Heisenberg]

WZR Army sign? Is that Ryan Clark's faction?

[owenbrown]

There was no 10 count after you guys went through the titantron, dumbass.

[owenbrown]

WZR Army sign? Is that Ryan Clark's faction?

Fuck Ryan Clark.
Also, they focused on a SuperCena sign at the end of the live Pre-Raw commercial

[ClockShot]

It's Memorial Day, I think there's a group of guys who fight for justice that need to make their presence know right about now.

[owenbrown]

Wake me when this promo is over

[Lock Jaw]

Wasting a 3-stages of Hell match on a lackluster feud

[Heisenberg]

Terrance and Phillip should come out and save this segment.

[ClockShot]

Dudley Boys ain't around anymore, Cena.

[mike adamle]

What was the first stip?

[ClockShot]

Bret Hart lurking in the back tonight?

[Lock Jaw]

Some pretty lackluster stipulations in the match as well

[Immortal Moose]

Wake me when this promo is over

Might as well go into hibernation.

[owenbrown]

Lumberjack match, adamle

[Lock Jaw]

What was the first stip?

Freakin' Lumberjack match

[mike adamle]

Wasting a 3-stages of Hell match on a lackluster feud

3 stages of hell sucks. First two were great, now they just throw random stips together.

[Corndad]

Crowd not into this at all. Shocking being a Canada crowd and all.

[Lock Jaw]

Pretty obvious Ryback wins the table match in that "by accident" or "sudden" way

[ClockShot]

What's with the biblical terms?

[owenbrown]

fucking What? chants

[dronepool]

I like Ryback a little more now.

[Cool King]

Heyman with the save.

[ClockShot]

CUR-TIS AX-EL!

[Immortal Moose]

What's with the biblical terms?

3 Stages of Hell match.

[owenbrown]

well there goes this guy's push...squashed after a week by SuperCena

[Emperor Smeat]

Think they messed up the order of the stips.

If the first fall is a lumberjack match to make sure Ryback doesn't leave, what stops him from leaving during the tables match.

[Immortal Moose]

Fuck, bring back the original theme.

[Lock Jaw]

Damn. One week and they already ruined Axel's theme

[Cool King]

Version 3 of Axel's theme now.

[Heisenberg]

What?? The theme song is gone?

Damn unclefuckas

[GD]

Why would they ruin the theme :(

[owenbrown]

cause they know they are feeding him to Cena so they are saying fuck his theme

[Lock Jaw]

Hey Alberto, yo already avenged your loss on Main Event

[Cool King]

Oh good, another Langston match. :|

[Corndad]

The hell would the change the Theme already?? That aside, well HHH last week, Cena this week, least giving it off that this kid can be a Main Event player with Heyman beside him.

[Lock Jaw]

Cool King not impressed with Big E apparently.

[owenbrown]

rubber match between Del Rio & Big E Langston?

[Road Warrior]

Is there anyone on this show that can cut a promo ? Never thought I'd miss Punk so much.

[Cool King]

Cool King not impressed with Big E apparently.

I find him somewhat annoying and boring. Also, his finisher is terrible.

[KIRA]

Ryback never got to the good names "Son of perdition", "little horn" "Morning Star" etc.

yea I'm not feeling this Ryback /Cena feud

[Lock Jaw]

I'LL GO TO THE PAPERS IF I HAVE TO

[Road Warrior]

Also, his finisher is terrible.

:yes:

[Corndad]

Ryback needs a Mouthpiece Manager really bad if he wants to stay in the Main Event scene. Heyman would have been a good choice but really any one would be an improvement.

[Road Warrior]

Ashy Langston

[GD]

This is like when Orlando Jordan had a series of matches with Undertaker prior to his big championship match against JBL.

[KIRA]

Aj looks bemused lol

[GD]

Jerry Lawler needs to go. He's just terrible.

[owenbrown]

oh look Pervy McPerverson Lawler is back...

[ClockShot]

Raw hasn't really been the same without Zigs since he's been gone.

[owenbrown]

HOW FUCKING DARE YOU CUT OFF DOLPH ZIGGLER!!! :foc:

[ClockShot]

ZIGS IS ON THE PHONE, FROM HOME!

Was that a marble shower in the background?

[Cool King]

This app shit is getting to the "Twitter annoying" level of annoyingness.

[GD]

Shades of Carlito.

[GD]

Shades of HBK.

[Cool King]

Good, it's over and Del Rio wins. :y:

[ClockShot]

Dolph better get back and mend the fences, asap.

[mike adamle]

Man, Ryback sure has fallen a long ways down the ladder since that program with Punk.

[mike adamle]

Then again, Goldberg wasn't really very interesting to me after his streak either, They really are the same exact type of wrestler, only Ryback decides to wear RVD tights for some reason.

[ClockShot]

My Crystal Ball tells me that the implosion of Team Hell No is near.

[Corndad]

Love this new Daniel Bryan Weakest Link Gimmick lol

[KIRA]

Its weird seeing Kane the positive motivator

[owenbrown]

Bret's getting grayer

[Corndad]

LOL His face right now.

[ClockShot]

That pep talk from The Hitman now has me worried.

[Immortal Moose]

lol

[ClockShot]

Sierra........Hotel..........India........Echo..........Lima........Delta.........SHIELD

[KIRA]

That pep talk from The Hitman now has me worried.

why?

[KIRA]

nevermind I see

[ClockShot]

Probably because they could get the belts back.


Hope Ambrose puts this feud to an end tonight.

[Emperor Smeat]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>Nice to see Dean Ambrose is looking to break @<a href="https://twitter.com/heelziggler">heelziggler</a>'s record of matches against @<a href="https://twitter.com/truekofi">truekofi</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23RAWTonight">#RAWTonight</a></p>&mdash; WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) <a href="https://twitter.com/WWECreative_ish/status/339179440359747584">May 28, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[ClockShot]

Tellin' ya, Creative is watching this site.

[KIRA]

Probably because they could get the belts back.


Hope Ambrose puts this feud to an end tonight.


It'd be odd to give them the belts again especially since Bryans in the midst of a mental meltdown and the main contributor is not having the titles

[ClockShot]

Right to the Tag Match, OKAY!

[Corndad]

How many rematches can we fit into one Raw...

[ClockShot]

That Giancarlo Esposito in that Destiny commercial?

Bungie's bringing in the big guns to sell this game.

[Immortal Moose]

That Giancarlo Esposito in that Destiny commercial?

Bungie's bringing in the big guns to sell this game.

Certainly got me more pumped.

[ClockShot]

Crowd got the random chants going right now.

[GD]

Love D Bryan's new mean streak.

[KIRA]

bryan is murdering rollins

[GD]

How long has this tag title match been? It's so cool.

[Corndad]

This is one rematch could watch over and over. Awesome match so far.

[Emperor Smeat]

Amazing match

[ClockShot]

Rollins with a flying knee to the head.

Not really much of a finisher.

[Volare]

Well we all know the next Tag Team splitting up...

[ClockShot]

Great match regardless.

[Immortal Moose]

Awesome match.

[Cool King]

I think that was the first time I've ever seen a legal man that was in control of the match, be concerned about his partner not being in his corner.

[GD]

I don't care about the Triple H melodrama.

[ClockShot]

King of Kings theme.

[dronepool]

Great match. They should feud longer.

[ClockShot]

Scott Heyman.

Any relation to Paul Heyman?

[Cool King]

Hmmm, I wonder which will get the most votes!?

[ClockShot]

Would totally vote for Ring Announcer.

If I had the app, which would require a smart phone. Which I don't have, beacuse I have a dumb phone.

[Emperor Smeat]

So are not enough people downloading the WWE app for the WWE to keep telling people to download the thing each week?

Might be better to advertise it a lot more than just whenever it needs to be done.

[Immortal Moose]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p>Glad our physicians don't believe in doctor-patient confidentiality <a href="https://twitter.com/search/%23RAWTonight">#RAWTonight</a></p>&mdash; WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) <a href="https://twitter.com/WWECreative_ish/status/339190602145071106">May 28, 2013</a></blockquote>
<script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[ClockShot]

We're better off voting to see if WWE should bring back the brunette dancer for Fandango.

[VSG]

Just saw an ad for a new David Attenborough show on my brit stream. :heart: him

[ClockShot]

Those are some round numbers.

Barrett has new music again? What the fuck for?

[Cool King]

Sex Pistols Barrett logo.

[GD]

I am fine with this entrance.

[Cool King]

I'm not impressed with Summer Rae.

[ClockShot]

Your beard is weird, HBK.

[Cool King]

Check the beard.

[dronepool]

HBK.. yay.

[Immortal Moose]

I'm not impressed with Summer Rae.

Nice stomach though.

[owenbrown]

for God's sake stop shilling the WWE app, Cole

[Shisen Kopf]

Who started the official raw thread at owenbrown's rassle-rama forums?

[owenbrown]

no one

[Shisen Kopf]

Damn, I woulda thought Jigaboo woulda done it

[owenbrown]

he can start it in the new special ERAG/Dylan Staples forum

[Shisen Kopf]

Goddamn ERAG is so damn awesome!

[Emperor Smeat]

Had the WWE not released Derrick Bateman, this would have been the perfect opportunity to debut The USA Guy ... and probably be booed since its in Canada.

[Heisenberg]

In ERAG, two boys enter the tramp, one leaves the winner, the other gets grounded...as fuckkkkkkkkk

[Immortal Moose]

Goddamn ERAG is so damn awesome!

Should be incorporated into the 3 stages of hell match.

[Cool King]

Why did they show a sign saying "Troglodyte"?

Do the camera guys even know what that word means?

[ClockShot]

Pauly not having any theme music bothers me.

[Heisenberg]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/977d5e0785937424c2938c682ac90d00/tumblr_mnhk34zr8t1qcluu2o1_500.png

Get that unclefucker out here now!!

[Immortal Moose]

Why did they show a sign saying "Troglodyte"?

Do the camera guys even know what that word means?

They know it refers to the likes of them.

[Cool King]

Damn, seeing and hearing Punk now just makes me realise how much I miss him on Raw.

[Corndad]

Ah. Mr. Punk.

[Immortal Moose]

Thank god.

[Cool King]

Jericho doing a fantastic impersonation of Cole and Lawler there.

[Corndad]

Bringing Punk back already lol Makes sense he comes back in Chicago

[Heisenberg]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mau7moQ94T1r7bjxco1_500.jpg

Bring back this Paul Heyman guy??

[Shisen Kopf]

In ERAG, two boys enter the tramp, one leaves the winner, the other gets grounded...as fuckkkkkkkkk

EXIT RING AND GRAB=ERAG for those who don't know. RIP Vicky Venom.

[Heisenberg]

They both enter the tramp, zip up the cage, and try to exit and grab, the other...well, they have to lick their mother's vagina

[Kris P Lettus]

Cool King talking shit about the camera operators

[Immortal Moose]

They both enter the tramp, zip up the cage, and try to exit and grab, the other...well, they have to lick their mother's vagina

The opposing mother? Or is incest incorporated?

[Shisen Kopf]

They both enter the tramp, zip up the cage, and try to exit and grab, the other...well, they have to lick their mother's vagina

That's metal as FUCK! USA #1

[Heisenberg]

The opposing mother? Or is incest incorporated?

In TRamp Wrestling Feds, the rules are decided over Yoohoo milk and t.v. dinner, your mom is with you to sign the contract and knows what goes down. Pretty fuckin serious shit from those competitors, those warriors of the backyard.


Word is that some lose so much, they know the exact location of their mother's clit. Heavy

[Lock Jaw]

Summer Rae looks like some sort of giant bird

[Shisen Kopf]

Cool King talking shit about the camera operators

Who has better wire luggers, UFC or WWE?

[Cool King]

Fuck yeah, Kaitlyn!

[Kris P Lettus]

Kaitlyn is hotttt

[Corndad]

Good Lord Kaitlyn causing stuff down under tonight.

[el bobbo]

Can someone post a screen shot of her?

[Cool King]

Kaitlyn is hotttt

Daaaaaaaamn right.

[Kris P Lettus]

Lol bret hart whaaaaaat

[Immortal Moose]

Lol bret hart whaaaaaat

yep

[Heisenberg]

He should of had his 90's glasses to put on ppl that he encountered backstage.

[Innovator]

BRAY

[Cool King]

BRAY!

[Bad News Gertner]

Bray fucking Wyatt!

[Immortal Moose]

BRAY WYATT!

[Corndad]

The hell was that promo. OMG that was kinda awesome little bit.

[owenbrown]

Team Deliverance?

[Emperor Smeat]

:D Wyatt and he got to keep his NXT gimmick

[Innovator]

Fuck, going to start watching again with the Wyatt family coming

[dronepool]

I like the Mankind meets Redneck Leatherface gimmick... or whatever that was.

[Immortal Moose]

The hell was that promo. OMG that was kinda awesome little bit.

Remember Husky Harris, IRS's son?

[Cool King]

lol Cole "some German team".

[Heisenberg]

Some good shit with them coming up

[KIRA]

DELIVERANCE LARP festival

[Bad News Gertner]

If you haven't watched NXT, Bray Wyatt is amazing, cuts awesome promos and has an awesome ring presence. Luke Harper and Erick Rowan are going to be a great monster tag team that the WWE has been lacking.

[Bad News Gertner]

That was like watching a family video for Owenbrown. Just add a black hanging from a tree and bam.

[owenbrown]

Cody went overboard on the bronzer this week?

[Immortal Moose]

Good god, JBL making fun of Lawler's heart attack.

[Immortal Moose]

Turtle Man has a show?

[slik]

I like the Mankind meets Redneck Leatherface gimmick... or whatever that was.

That was probably the best promo I've seen since the promo's for Jericho's return that were creepy.

[Shisen Kopf]

That was like watching a family video for Owenbrown. Just add a black hanging from a tree and bam.

How many of them have fetal alcohol syndrome?

[Corndad]

I wished I cared about this match. It's a shame they watered down Team Rhodes Scholars. Both Sandow and Cody have the stuff to be big time players

[KIRA]

I wished I cared about this match. It's a shame they watered down Team Rhodes Scholars. Both Sandow and Cody have the stuff to be big time players I would've cared if I didn't know my sleep is going to have backwoods pig fuckers in it thanks to that promo.

[Immortal Moose]

I wished I cared about this match. It's a shame they watered down Team Rhodes Scholars. Both Sandow and Cody have the stuff to be big time players

It's a also a shame they watered down Orton, I still want '09 Orton back.

[Immortal Moose]

I would've cared if I didn't know my sleep is going to have backwoods pig fuckers in it thanks to that promo.

Bet I can make ya SQUEEEEEEEEL!




Picture Kreiger saying that....

[KIRA]

Bet I can make ya SQUEEEEEEEEL!




Picture Kreiger saying that....



oh god:'(

[The Condor]

Late coming. Good show this far, especially the first hour

[Immortal Moose]

Late coming. Good show this far, especially the first hour

The tag match was the best part so far.

[Kris P Lettus]

Does cena even lift??

[Immortal Moose]

The Mr. Perfect part of his new theme needs to come in earlier and be more pronounced.

[The Condor]

The tag match was the best part so far.

PPV quality from what I see

[Kris P Lettus]

Is he curt hennings son

[Volare]

The Mr. Perfect part of his new theme needs to come in earlier and be more pronounced.

Should've just kept the first god damnd one it was "perfect" and didn't need to be fucked with.

[Cool King]

Is he curt hennings son

Why yes he is.

[Immortal Moose]

Should've just kept the first god damnd one it was "perfect" and didn't need to be fucked with.

You speak the truth.

[Cool King]

Something is going on in the crowd.

[Corndad]

The hell is going on in the crowd

[Corndad]

Might wanna stay away from the close ups of Cena calling the match there guys.

[Immortal Moose]

The crowd is more focused on their shit.

[Crimson]

lol crowd being distracted will be blamed on Axel

[Cool King]

Cole talks about how Axel used to be ignored and looked over, but now he isn't. As soon he says that, the crowd ignores Axel and focuses on something else in the crowd.

[Corndad]

PERFECT PLEX!

[Volare]

PERFECTFUCKINGPLEX!! AND AWESOMELY DONE!

[Immortal Moose]

HOLLA IF YA HEAR ME... oh...

[Emperor Smeat]

Zack Ryder is back?

[Bad News Gertner]

I like the new opening to Axel's theme better but God is he ever boring.

[Cool King]

It's Scott St-oh wait, it's Ryback.

[Corndad]

Axel gonna win by Countout again lol

[Volare]

AXEL WINS!!

[Heisenberg]

Thought it was Steiner...

[Bad News Gertner]

RYBACK!

[Crimson]

Little Perfect with the mini perfect plex

[Rollermacka]

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/QTqwnMWiH1I" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Every time I hear that ambulance, I just wait for those words....

[The Condor]

Axel's getting a good rub

[Corndad]

Anyone linking up this Bret thing?

[Bad News Gertner]

Ugh, please don't let Bret Hart get on the mic.

[Corndad]

Wouldn't be shocked if the WWE APP goes down

[Bad News Gertner]

Bret needs to dye his hair bad. He looks 70.

[Immortal Moose]

Mmmm beef jerkey, vodka, and Bret Hart.

[The Condor]

Bret needs to dye his hair bad. He looks 70.

Beginning to transition into a Morlock

[Bad News Gertner]

Damn it Jerry don't give him the mic!

[Bad News Gertner]

Wow, Bret's daughter is smoking hott

[Juan]

how the hell do I watch this on the app? I'm in the Raw Active section but I don't see anything

[Bad News Gertner]

Even Patterson wouldn't fuck Bret in this state.

[Immortal Moose]

how the hell do I watch this on the app? I'm in the Raw Active section but I don't see anything

I just opened it up and clicked on RAW.

[Bad News Gertner]

Hahaha nice gay joke Bret

[Immortal Moose]

Gay jokes... classy...

[Bad News Gertner]

Bashing gays always gets a pop

[VSG]

<iframe width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/8cRD-82-fqU?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Yet again they allude to 3 other "family members"

[Immortal Moose]

Bashing gays always gets a pop

So does burning crosses in some places.

[Bad News Gertner]

Oh wow HBK

[Immortal Moose]

Haha that beard

[Bad News Gertner]

Vinny Mac!

[Immortal Moose]

VINNIE MAC!

[Bad News Gertner]

Prettycool is jealous of HBK's beard.

[Bad News Gertner]

Id mark out huge if HBK Superkick's Bret.

[Bad News Gertner]

Look at Tyson Kidd sporting a full head of hair

[Immortal Moose]

Jamie Noble sighting.

[Lock Jaw]

Lance Storm sighting too

[Lock Jaw]

<iframe width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/8cRD-82-fqU?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Yet again they allude to 3 other "family members"

I see no allusion.

[VSG]

2 other guys + 1 gal around 46s into that above video. First showed up on NXT:

Very interesting part was the Bray Wyatt promo which showed Luke Harper, Rowan and a few more of his "children" including a woman:

http://i49.tinypic.com/nwak2h.png

So looks like 4 giants and a female companion/diva.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>I think the others are just extras who aren't going to be in the actual stable.</font>

[Volare]

Southern Ministry....of Darkness. :)


I can see it now, Wyatt gains controll of his family by "baptisim" of however dramatic you want to make it. (fire, water, kool-aid, etc etc)

[Lock Jaw]

Yeah, they Bray Wyatt promos I have seen always had random people "listening to his word"

[Shisen Kopf]

Hahaha nice gay joke Bret

Bret Hart is the best ever! goddamn gays!

[Emperor Smeat]

<font color=goldenrod>I think the others are just extras who aren't going to be in the actual stable.</font>

Yeah think that was only ever meant as a play on his "preacher"-like gimmick.

He preaches his twisted messages to the masses while his actual followers are the 2 guys who act as the fanatical bodyguards for him.

[Bad News Gertner]

For all you Indy dweebs, the dark haired guy is Brodie Lee

[Skippord]

never been more excited for someone to debut as I am for Bray Wyatt

[#1-norm-fan]

Don't fuck up Bray Wyatt, WWE.

The future looks bright with Wyatt, Curtis and the like... Take special care of them, you dog shit, mentally retarded writers.

[#1-norm-fan]

But let's be realistic... Wyatt will be jobbing to Kofi Kingston in 3 months and I'll cry over what wrestling could have been.

[Lock Jaw]

Reform the team of Husky Harris & Michael McGillicutty. SWERVE.

[#1-norm-fan]

I would kill fitty men if that happened...

[Droford]

But let's be realistic... Wyatt will be jobbing to Kofi Kingston in 3 months and I'll cry over what wrestling could have been.

Cm punk will take it over.

[Bad News Gertner]

Ugh, no.

[Droford]

He already led a cult type group and he already took over another one. Plus he has cult in his theme..he will woo them over with his personality

[Bad News Gertner]

Ugh, no. Bray Wyatt hasn't even debuted yet and he's already more interesting than Punk.

[Droford]

He can join ryback and be team feed us more

[VSG]

I am trying to find that promo where clearly it says 2 other men will join and the woman speaks up, holds hands with Bray Wyatt and says "this is just the beginning, my eater of worlds" or something. It could be a scrapped plan though.

[DaVe]

pretty excited for Wyatt's debut, glad he's keeping his NXT music too unlike Langston. Wyatt's character and mannerisms in the ring are fairly absorbing.

[VSG]

Langston had kept his NXT music initially.