Raw Thread, 12.11.17

[Lock Jaw]

Stair Wars

[Dark One]

So Braun and Kane become a tag team now, right?

[slik]

Kane had visible mantie line for a moment. Very embarrassing for the big red machine.

[slik]

Kane will eat the pin in the triple threat at the Rumble

[Dark One]

Very nice for Vince and co to let a Make-a-Wish kid write this week's show at the last minute.

[ClockShot]

Kane just trip over Braun?

[Lock Jaw]

ha ha Kane randomly falling down

[Lock Jaw]

https://media.giphy.com/media/9AM0H2QnB2GB2/giphy.gif

[ClockShot]

Atta boy, Braun.

[Dark One]

This will all be worthwhile if Braun having zombie sit-up powers is now canon.

[KIRA]

BRAUN IS THAT DUDE!

[Dark One]

It would be the greatest thing of all time if this gives Braun the Zombie Sit-up, and he starts yelling "I'M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU" as he did it every time.

[Lock Jaw]

Turning on Ride Along for Breezango

[SlickyTrickyDamon]

That took too long

[KIRA]

emotional @ very fat man in crowd watching the show w/ chubby lil son

:lol:

[Emperor Smeat]

It would be the greatest thing of all time if this gives Braun the Zombie Sit-up, and he starts yelling "I'M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU" as he did it every time.

Would be a way better use of stolen powers than when Bray stole powers.

[KIRA]

When Kane loses his bid he's going to be jobbing to Bo Dallas

[Lock Jaw]

Fandango not wearing a shirt while riding along

[Tom Guycott]

Not a fan of the overuse of graphics going back and forth

Yeah... it was better last week with just the "interruptions" into Bray's promo. This just looks like whoever worked on that Matt graphic was super juiced about showing it off.

Truthfully, though, I'm more upset about Hardy sitting in front of a wrinkly bedsheet for two weeks now. You'd think with is #broken brilliance, he'd have an actual backdrop.

[Tom Guycott]

Balor should go to SD...lots more potential for him there than RAW

If nothing else, Styles and Nakamura. And singles matches against both Benjamin and Gable. And the "doghouse friends". Shit... he really *would* be better off in a trade.

[Tom Guycott]

Don't worry Lock Jaw, I got you. It's actually ripped off from a lesser known mid-90s wrestler:

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jwmxqEJnzHE?start=124" frameborder="0" gesture="media" allow="encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Is it just me, or did the other guy look like a heavier Pete Dunne?

[Tom Guycott]

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="und" dir="ltr">.<a href="https://twitter.com/CedricAlexander?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@CedricAlexander</a>!! �� <a href="https://t.co/zUSj9nW3fc">pic.twitter.com/zUSj9nW3fc</a></p>&mdash; TDE Wrestling (@totaldivaseps) <a href="https://twitter.com/totaldivaseps/status/940410992063864833?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">December 12, 2017</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

Holy crap at that setup move done by Cedric for the Lumbar Check

So, now I guess he should dress like Jack Sparrow?

[Tom Guycott]

Where is Tozawa?
Whatever happened to TJP?

"These are all questions you *don't* have to answer, because wrestling. isn't. real. :clicks teeth: :y:"

[Tom Guycott]

I'd say Nia Jax is going to be Cruiserweight Champion but... you know.

Well, she's not like most girls.

Which means she can ignore gender and weight limits and win it anyway because fuck you that's why.

And I somehow see her eventually getting her heart broken because Enzo is an asshole and end up pairing up with Gulak in a face turn. Less ODB/EY, and more Stevie Richards/Jazz.

[Tom Guycott]

Hate:

- The going to black and mask on the tron thing before Asuka's music hits

- The remix of Asuka's theme

I still have yet to hear this "remix", but the mask before the music kinda irks me too. It is especially weird since Vince hated that bit of silence in Seth's entrance, but then likely is the one who came up with the notion to do this to hers. Seems like changing stuff merely for the sake of changing.


Addendum: just heard it. Eh. I double down on what I just said about changing shit just to change. Seems like someone decided to re-record the words on a karioke machine instead of in a studio and make the redone vocal track way louder than the song now.

[Tom Guycott]

Monstrous moments:

"Flipped over an ambulance with Roman Reigns trapped inside"
"Crushed Braun Strowman inside a garbage truck at TLC"

Amazing. Kane would have won that comparison if it had been "Electrocuted Shane McMahon's testicles with a car battery" or "Once lit JR on fire to profess his love for BBQ."

... and for reasons never quite explained, an unhealthy fixation with torturing Pete Rose.

[Tom Guycott]

Stair Wars

Episode 5: Roman Empire Strikes Back

Episode 6: Return of the Jobbers

[Anybody Thrilla]

Cesaro worked the fuck out of Roman's arm, all for nothing. Sickening.

[Anybody Thrilla]

I don't usually say it, but that Raw was completely pathetic.

[Big Vic]

Happy I tuned out when I did then.

[Cool King]

• They really need to add more variety to the women's promo training at the Performance Center because Mandy Rose does her promos the exact same way Sasha Banks does her promos and also Bayley and early Alexa Bliss and Carmella (although Bliss & Carmella shook it off a long time ago now).

I can also notice it a little bit when Sonya Deville talks too. Having women come up to the main roster with most of them talking like clones and doing horrible promos is something I'm not looking forward to as eventually, in the future, the entire women's division will all talk the same way.

• I'm actually giving time to Matt Hardy to see what all the jizzing is about but I just can't get into it.

I just don't get it. I don't get the love for this gimmick.

His promo last night made me think that that is what it would be like if you got a mentally retarded guy absolutely hammered.

• Drew Gulak is the reason why I'm watching the Cruiserweight Division now. I really want him to be champion.

The guy is great.

On the subject of Cruiserweights, how can one man (Cedric Alexander) be so damn bland and boring? Even his promo was bland and boring. The same can be said about his theme too.

I don't think I've ever seen a Cruiserweight with such little charisma. He just seems to suck the fun out of you, along with any interest you've had in Raw up to that point.

Finally, I will say this (again):

Poor Nia. :(

[Cool King]

Oh, also:

that Raw was completely pathetic.

[Big Vic]

Feel like Cool King tuned out about the same time I did.

A plus for SDL is while I believe the new faction of women are awful at promos they do at least show a different side of character.

[Emperor Smeat]

• I'm actually giving time to Matt Hardy to see what all the jizzing is about but I just can't get into it.

I just don't get it. I don't get the love for this gimmick.

His promo last night made me think that that is what it would be like if you got a mentally retarded guy absolutely hammered.
Like everything in the WWE that gets really popular without WWE's or Vince's direct input, WWE drives it into the ground at record speeds.

Overproduced this week's split promo segment and seems they don't understand the only reason it worked in Impact was due to its campy style and not meant to take what Matt does or says seriously.

[Anybody Thrilla]

Guys. That Matt Hardy shit is awful. Please stop attempting to justify it. It's flat out bad.

[Emperor Smeat]

This week's episode ended up being the lowest since mid-June at 2.684 million viewers. 3rd hour was better than last week but 1st hour was down by a lot this week. Possible sign tv audiences are tired of the typical Braun monster matches for main events and the 3rd hour doing a terrible job keeping interest for the main event.

In terms of rankings, NFL related stuff and blood rival Love & Hip Hop took the Top 3 spots while RAW took #4-6.

Monday’s Raw drew an average of 2,684,000 viewers, down from last week’s 2,813,000 viewers.

That’s the lowest viewer number since June 12 (2,542,000) ...

Hourly breakdown:

8PM: 2,876,000
9PM: 2,608,000
10PM: 2,570,000

[Ruien]

If the 3rd hour was better doesn't that mean people stayed for Braun?

[Emperor Smeat]

I''d argue both yes and no. Yes in the sense the drop between 9pm to 10pm was low but no in the sense its more likely because WWE actually had interesting stuff occur in the 3rd hour for once.

3rd hour had both the rest of Cesaro-Reigns match and Joe-Ambrose match occur and still suffered a drop which likely points to the main event not pulling its weight. Had it not happen, very likely RAW would have had the rare moment of the 3rd hour being better than the 2nd hour.

The main event having the long pre-match promo video and match itself being a buzzkill likely played a role as well.