Great Sports quotes...

[VonErich Lives]

Here are the top ten comments made by sports commentators that they
would like to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator at the women's Olympic Snatch and Jerk
Event: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning
during her warm up and it was amazing."

2. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator: "This is really a lovely horse
and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

3. Grand Prix Race Announcer: "The lead car is absolutely, truly
unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical to the
one in front of the similar one in back."

4. Greg Norman, Pro Golfer: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my
mother and father."

5. Ringside Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries and even
some deaths in boxing - but none of them really that serious."

6. Baseball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we
can expect the same thing again."

7. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition
doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."

8. At a trophy ceremony BBC TV Boat Race 1988: "Ah, isn't that nice,
the wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford
crew."

9. Metro Radio, College Football: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's
like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

10. US Open TV Commentator: "One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing
so well is that before each final round, his wife takes out his balls
and kisses them. Oh my God, what have I just said?

[DaveWadding]

LOL @ most of those.

[El Capitano Gatisto]

Seen them all many times before. Why's it talking about college football for that Julian Dicks one? That's from a West Ham Premiership match.

[Dazz]

Yeah seent hem all before, I have a book of funnier sporting quotes which at present I dunno where it is, even if I did I wouldnt bother getting it.

[samichna]

Imagine Arnold Palmer getting his nuts licked. PRETTY HOT.

[The Mackem]

I think that's Metro radio from my area.

[packt up]

I think that's Metro radio from my area.

MY Area :P

Yeah thats right Newcastle takes presidence :P

[Gonzo]

:lol:

[ct2k]

Man, i gotta find some Yogi Berra gems

[El Capitano Gatisto]

Here's some quotes from George Hamilton, the football commentator on RTE (Irish TV). He is a real plum at times. Irish commentators and analysts are comedy gold nearly every game. These ones are from football365.com:

- "Real Madrid are like a rabbit in the glare of the headlights in the face of Manchester United's attacks. But this rabbit comes with a suit of armour in the shape of two precious away goals."

- "And Hyypia rises like a giraffe to head the ball clear."

- "What a goal. What a goal! Straight through the legs of Adams, it flew towards the roof of the net like a Wurlitzer! I mean, like a ... howitzer"

- "The midfield are like a chef...trying to prise open a stubborn oyster to get at the fleshy meat inside."

- "The orange tide is lapping against the green door which refuses to open."

- "Glum Oranges. In fact I think the fruit their feelings are more akin to is a lemon."

- "We could let them score one now and they wouldn't have time to score another."

- "Kevin Moran.....oldest man on the pitch today...35 years of age.....of course the referee could possibly be older than that ......and technically he's on the pitch too.....then again his linesmen could be even older than him... but are they technically 'on' the pitch."

- "That should be NO problem for the defence - OH NOOOO!!"

- "I might be tempting fate but I can't see the Poles Scoring...OH NOOOO they just have!!"

- George: Roy Carsley has it
Jim: Lee Carsley, George
George: Ah yes, perhaps it's because his head reminds me of Ray Wilkins

- "Red Sky at night, good day tomorrow."

- "The flags are waving, and no doubt at the foot of the Alps, the cow bells are chiming too. And it's going to take a lot for Ireland to turn it round and sour the chocolate."

"They've really eked this one out. Like coal miners mining their seam until they finally reach the surface with their precious black gold."

[Terra Ryzin]

I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf. - Tug McGraw when asked if he prefers grass or turf.

[Terra Ryzin]

Man, i gotta find some Yogi Berra gems
"This is like deja vu all over again."

"You can observe a lot just by watching."

"He must have made that before he died."
-- Referring to a Steve McQueen movie.

"I want to thank you for making this day necessary." --
On Yogi Berra Appreciation Day in St. Louis in 1947.

"I'd find the fellow who lost it, and, if he was poor, I'd return it."
-- When asked what he would do if he found a million dollars.

"Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?"

"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."

"If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else."

"I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early."

"If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."

"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."

"Baseball is 90% mental -- the other half is physical."

"It was impossible to get a conversation going;
everybody was talking too much."

"Slump? I ain't in no slump. I just ain't hitting."

"A nickel isn't worth a dime today."

"Nobody goes there anymore;
it's too crowded."

"It gets late early out there."
-- Referring to the bad sun conditions in left field at the stadium.

Once, Yogi's wife Carmen asked, "Yogi, you are from St. Louis, we live in New Jersey, and you played ball in New York. If you go before I do, where would you like me to have you buried?" Yogi replied, "Surprise me."

"Do you mean now?"
-- When asked for the time.

"The wind always seems to blow against catchers when they are running."

"I take a two hour nap, from one o'clock to four."

"You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn't enough in the second half you give what's left."

"90% of the putts that are short don't go in."

"I made a wrong mistake."

"Texas has a lot of electrical votes."
-- During an election campaign, after George Bush stated that Texas was important to the election.

"Thanks, you don't look so hot yourself."
-- After being told he looked cool.

"I always thought that record would stand until it was broken."

"Yeah, but we're making great time!"
-- In reply to "Hey Yogi, I think we're lost."

"If the fans don't come out to the ball park, you can't stop them."

"Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel."

"It's never happened in the World Series competition, and it still hasn't."

"How long have you known me, Jack? And you still don't know how to spell my name."
-- Upon receiving a check from Jack Buck made out to "bearer."

"I'd say he's done more than that."
-- When asked if first baseman Don Mattingly had exceeded expectations for the current season.

"The other teams could make trouble for us if they win."

"He can run anytime he wants. I'm giving him the red light."
-- On the acquisition of fleet Ricky Henderson.

"I never blame myself when I'm not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn't my fault that I'm not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?"

"It ain't the heat; it's the humility."

"The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase."

"You should always go to other people's funerals;
otherwise, they won't come to yours."

"I didn't really say everything I said."

[Doink]

cant believe you missed out the infamous ron atkinson quote

[The Mackem]

MY Area :P

Yeah thats right Newcastle takes presidence :P
No it doesn't :foc:

[Moonax]

My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7.
David Beckham

I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league.
Mark Viduka

We lost because we didn't win.
Ronaldo

If you don't believe you can win, there is no point in getting out of bed at the end of the day.
Neville Southall

He's put on weight and I've lost it, and vice versa.
Ronnie Whelan

I was watching the Blackburn game on TV on Sunday when it flashed on the screen that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham. My first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there playing.
Ade Akinbiyi

I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel.
Stuart Pearce

Alex Ferguson is the best manager I've ever had at this level. Well, he's the only manager I've actually had at this level. But he's the best manager I've ever had.
David Beckham

I've had 14 bookings this season - 8 of which were my fault, but 7 of which were disputable.
Paul Gascoigne

I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that as well.
Alan Shearer

I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona.
Mark Draper

You've got to believe that you're going to win, and I believe we'll win the World Cup until the final whistle blows and we're knocked out.
Peter Shilton

Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us the match.
Ian Wright

I'm as happy as I can be - but I have been happier.
Ugo Ehiogu

Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesborough.
Jonathan Woodgate

I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told me it was my right.
Lee Hendrie

I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country.
Ian Rush

Germany are a very difficult team to play...they had 11 internationals out there today.
Steve Lomas

I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock.
Barry Venison

I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don't know into what religion yet.
David Beckham

The Brazilians were South American, and the Ukranians will be more European.
Phil Neville

All that remains is for a few dots and commas to be crossed.
Mitchell Thomas

The opening ceremony was good, although I missed it.
Graeme Le Saux

One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.
Alan Shearer

I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd.
Johnny Giles

I was surprised, but I always say nothing surprises me in football.
Les Ferdinand

It was like the ref had a brand new yellow card and wanted to see if it worked.
Richard Rufus

There's no in between - you're either good or bad. We were in between.
Thierry Henry

[AlphaBean]

I have a few NCAA quotes from thishere Stuff magazine:

- "People say somewhere in the first round. Maybe higher." Ironhead Heyward said that when asked about his draft possibilities in 1988.

After a fire destroyed 20 books in Auburn's football dorm, Florida coach Steve Spurrier said "The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."

-"He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings." -- University of Houston WR Torrin Polk on coach John Jenkins.

Arkansas coach Lou Holtz, after fans threw oranges on the field to celebrate an Orange Bowl berth in 1978 said "I'm glad we're not going to the Gator Bowl."

Fridge Perry, after Clemson got a 2-year TV and postseason ban by the NCAA in 1983, said "What makes it hard is that we can't watch television for two years."

- "Gentlemen, it is better to have died as a small boy than to fumble this football." --John Heisman (Georgia Tech coach,)

- "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades, and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words." --Bobby Bowden, FSU coach, on LB Reggie Herring.

[The Mask]

"and the ricochet goes the way of McVeigh and he rounds O'Shea, it's a goal for McVeigh"

MOTD on saturday :love:

[ct2k]

:love: @ Yogi and the football quotes