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Aussie Skier
11-17-2004, 12:29 AM
Babyface 101 if u cant be bothered reading this, at least check out the pic

By now, it’s fairly obvious that WWE has chosen to put all their eggs in Randy Orton’s basket as the Raw brand’s new "top babyface".

After losing the World Title back to HHH under dubious means, this now frees Orton up to develop a natural following, and grow as a fan favorite, and not just be "forced" on the fans whether they were ready or not. From there, it is likely that Orton will chase HHH to WrestleMania, where logic points to him regaining that Title.

Now, with that said, I’m not going to be one of those detractors who claim that Orton will never maintain fan interest for an extended period of time, especially in the highly touted Wrestlemania Title chase spot. However, what I am going to discuss is the somewhat familiar booking that young Mr. Orton currently finds himself undergoing. I feel as if I’ve seen this all somewhere before….But that can’t be! Surely the WWE wouldn’t utilize the exact SAME routine in developing all their top stars? Nah. I just can’t see that.

All sarcasm aside, WWE seems to always be in a holding pattern as it pertains to how they market they’re top "good guy", especially since the dawn of the Attitude era. Not that the 1980’s were much different. During that time, Vince desperately tried to remold certain wrestlers in the mold of Hulk Hogan, but ultimately found that filling the Gigantic yellow clod-hoppers of the orange-skinned Hulkster a futile pursuit. But, still, Vince tried (and tried) to find that one special man who’d take that torch and run with it. Unfortunately, the world wasn’t ready for Lex Luger’s bus of Star-spangled horse shit, or Diesel and his Title reign that even our Lord Jesus Christ couldn’t resurrect from the dead. Hell, even the Ultimate Warrior couldn’t hold the world’s attention, despite having the best promos this side of….nobody….

All that is, until a bald headed savior came along, and no, I’m not referring to my penis, even though he goes by the same name. I’m of course talking about Stone Cold Steve Austin, a man, who smashed the mold and carved his own unique niche in the wrestling world, while heroes like the Hulkster disappeared faster than Jeff Foxwothy in a hip-hop club.

Fast forward, six years and WWE once again finds itself in the same funk it was in nearly a decade before.

Enter, Randy Orton. Rather than cultivating a unique persona, they’ve decided to go to the well of wrestling cliché’s yet again, and create a Frankenstein monster out of the spare parts of preceding Attitude era heroes.

Don’t believe me? Fine. But just keep watching Raw, and keep a check list of the following occurrences and tell me I’m wrong:

1) Tension with the owner and/or an authority figure of some sort;

Last time I checked, Randy Orton didn’t exactly have "bad blood" with Eric Bischoff, so what gives? Oh ya! He’s an Anti-authority bad ass now!..You know, despite being a chickenshit heel for the last two years and single-handedly helping Eric Bischoff maintain his current spot as G.M. one year ago when Orton won the Survivor Series for him. I don’t know about you, but I’d think that’d buy a little loyalty from old Easy E, but what do I know?

2) Humiliates his heel protagonist by using unusual props.

Now that he’s a man of the "people", the newly found Anti-authority bad ass will find himself compelled to embarrass those who are his worst enemies by utilizing some very unusual means, which are not limited to cakes and other messy foods, the driving of trucks to ringside, then spraying people with a hose from said truck, that of course will no doubt propel some sort of vile liquid at his foes. And finally, there is the out and out DESTRUCTION of the property of his arch rival, which more often than not will see the stealing…than demolishing of his "beloved" vehicle.

So, when you see Orton destroy HHH (or Bischoff’s) car (and it will happen), don’t blame Randy. He can’t help it. After all, this is what babyfaces do!

3)Gets "screwed" by the heel’s posse of wrestlers.

It wouldn’t be an attitude era babyface, if there wasn’t a CONSPIRACY to see him get beat and keep the title from his grasp through a series of intricately laid plots and betrayals! And damn, does it ever take A LOT of guys to put this sumbitch down, doesn’t it?

And it really is sad the way the owner/commissioner/GM always seems to think that it’d be a CRIME if this anti-authority hero somehow became champion! And as owner (or GM) the best thing to do is to make an uneasy alliance with another man that shares similar traits to your foe!

4)An uneasy alliance with another wrestler, usually a former "rival"

Why are these two men, fighting?! Don’t they know that they’re on the same side and will eventually learn to respect one another if only for the reason that they have been through the same hardships? And how come you always accidentally hit each other with chairs when you’re aiming for your common enemy? It’s a misunderstanding, that’s all! And besides, you will eventually shake hands, or at the very least share a beer together. But you won’t get too "buddy buddy" because "Attitude era babyfaces" don’t have real friends!

5)A newfound respect by the play by play announcer… despite the fact that not long before, this same man was participating in the same types of injustices that he himself is now a victim of.

By Gawd! This man’s toughness has earned my respect! You have to respect this man! He’s double tough! And he overcame all these adversities!

6) Being arrested, suspended, or escorted from the building for no real reason.

See number 1 and 2.

Better get used to getting the night off, buster! But don’t fret. Just because you’ve been arrested doesn’t mean you can’t strangely escape, and return just in time to close the show!

So, with all this in mind, I’ve decided to create some totally UNIQUE personas for Randy Orton below, in a collage I’m calling: THE MANY FACES OF RANDY ORTON:

CosaNostra
11-17-2004, 12:34 AM
LOL at The Underorton

Gerard
11-17-2004, 01:38 AM
LOL pretty funny but true article.

KayfabeMan
11-17-2004, 03:35 AM
:y:

Corkscrewed
11-17-2004, 03:58 AM
ROFLMAO!!! Okay, that is pure hilarity!!! :rofl:

Too bad none of it's happened yet... 'cept the uneasy alliance thing I guess...

A lot of the OPPOSITE has happened tho... :-\

Funky Fly
11-17-2004, 04:32 AM
ROFL

For once, the Honky Tonk Man isn't completely out of his mind.

SuperSlim
11-17-2004, 08:24 AM
that was actually some funny stuff. especially the pictures

The One
11-17-2004, 04:09 PM
Yeah for Honky Tonk...you may be a prick in real life, and bitter as all get out, but your still funny damn it all.

MVP
11-17-2004, 04:43 PM
Honky Tonk is the fucking man. :y:

BigDaddyCool
11-17-2004, 04:46 PM
hahahahahaha

crash99
11-17-2004, 04:59 PM
haha...very funny stuff and some good points

The Naitch
11-17-2004, 05:07 PM
hahaha

I wonder what die hard Orton fans think of that? I'm talking about those fans who ejaculated all over Orton when he was a heel IC champ. I bet they hate the fact that he's nothing but a bland and stale babyface.

John la Rock
11-17-2004, 05:08 PM
:rofl:

samichna
11-17-2004, 05:11 PM
lol

Tornado
11-17-2004, 07:11 PM
All that is, until a bald headed savior came along, and no, I’m not referring to my penis


LMFAO

Loose Cannon
11-17-2004, 07:13 PM
hahaha

I wonder what die hard Orton fans think of that? I'm talking about those fans who ejaculated all over Orton when he was a heel IC champ. I bet they hate the fact that he's nothing but a bland and stale babyface.

:nono: :nono: He was the hottest heel they had.

The CyNick
11-17-2004, 08:13 PM
I actually disagree with a lot of what Honky is saying.

I think a big part of the problem with Orton is that he's NOT being booked like Hogan and Austin.

Hogan and Austin didn't get beat down every other week, they didn't need a bunch of "allies" to defeat one or two heels, they didn't lose matches on a regular basis, they didn't get booked to run away form a fight.

And as far as the having "uneasy" allliances, I would say thats another problem. Austin used to hate teaming with other faces (HBK, Foley, Taker, etc) and they made that clear in the promos. With Orotn, he was being buddy buddy with all the faces that he was ragging ona couple of weeks prior.

So, yeah I would say if they actually did book Orotn the way Honky is claiming, he might really be over by now.

I also agree with what LC is saying, they had something working with him as a heel, they really should have had him run with the World Title as a heel. I can pretty much guarantee that had they done that, by this time next year he would have been a really viable babyface. Now, I'm not so convinced.

The Naitch
11-17-2004, 10:02 PM
:nono: :nono: He was the hottest heel they had.

Funny how they let Jericho just sit there on a time-out :nono: