SmackDown! Captions: 12/02/04 !

[Gone Mad]

Have fun! I'll be back to make some crappy captions.

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[Gouda]

Because it had to happen....

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The candidates for Sean Waltman's next sex tape lined up.

[Xero]

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RVD: I know I get high, but this is ridiculoussssss- *SPLAT*

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Batista: SON OF A BITCH STOLE OUR IDEA!

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The new Eddie-Basham ladder was a huge hit.

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Puder: Doing it for the money, hate homos, don't like it... Doing it for the money, hate homos, don't like it...

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JBL's Nasty Boy pit drop worked pretty well, until it killed Orlando, then he was screwed.

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(JBL Shoots)
JBL: That's the WWE logo bitch! And when you're in MY WWE ring, you can do NOTHING you big evil piece of shit! I WILL BURY YOU, BIATCH!
(After Armageddon)
Taker: You messed with the wrong guy, John... Now you get a taste of your own medicine.
Bradshaw: OKAY! OKAY! I GET IT! I WON'T BURY YOU! NOW GET THAT PINEAPPLE OUT OF MY ASS!

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RVD trips off the top rope.
Stevie: :shifty:

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WWE's Queer Guy for the Queer Guy was pretty much over with the fans.

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Hardcore: AND THAT'S FOR EATING THE LAST JELLY DONUT!

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Seconds later, Booker's belly button ate Eddie in a surprise turn of events.

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Ref (Looking and the tron): BOOBIES! *Wave* I SEE ME WITH BOOBIES!

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Luther: DOWN, BITCH, DOWN!

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Big Show: Think unsexy thoughts... Thinking unsexy thoughts... Think unsexy thoughts...

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JBL: YOU'RE HAIR'S ON FIRE! HERE! LET ME STOMP IT OUT!

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JBL: Oh yeah... OH YEAH!
Belty: ........ Please stop humping me...

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JBL: Okay guys, move over! He's gonna b*BEEP*ow me!

[V]

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Legit Main-eventers beware, we're taking over

[Azriel]

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It was such a sad day, even God had to turn his back on the WWE

[John la Rock]

Because it had to happen....

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The candidates for Sean Waltman's next sex tape lined up.

LMFAO :rofl:

[tucsonspeed6]

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Eddie: I'm sorry I had to break it to you like this....
Booker: But if he's not real then who left the puppy under the tree last year?

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You'd react the same way if you smelled a fart who had paid its dues...

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JBL: HA! You dumb sumbitch! Now you know why you can't wear roller skates in an ice rink don't you?
Taker: I still don't understand why RVD doesn't fall off his surfboard...

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Jericho: You think your shadow-puppet dog is pretty cool, huh? Check out this flock of birds!

[Gone Mad]

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RVD (as he's falling quickly): Theydon'thaveanyBudLightupthere! Doyouwantanything elseI'mupher-- **FLATTENED!!**

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Booker T botches Hands Across America.

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After this picture, the three "ladies" were seen coming out of a hotel room from someone identified as "unter earst elmsely."

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JBL's face turn failed as he tried to show it as he placed an armbar.. on himself.

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JBL: If you were a woman, I'd slugg ya!
OR
JBL: Get a job, yaaaa drrunk! *hiccup!*

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RVD: Come with me.. to Neverland!!
Kenzo: Dizamn, negro. You on de wacky tobacco. But, OK!

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TO (looking at the three): The hell with the game, I'm going to therapy NOW.

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Holly: YOU HAVEN'T PAID YOUR TAXES!

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Booker T, after Eddie told him the ending of "Old Yeller."

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Ref: I still think that's a dude in that scene with the other. See, there's the apple.
Jackie: Is this one of those National Geographic tapes or is it "One Night in Chyna" ?
Ref: I don't even know anymore...

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Luther: stuck.....oil...oiilll.. rire there..
Joy: Um... math? .... :shifty: **runs away slowly**

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JBL (singing): It's SpringTime for Hitler and Germ-- **KICKS** SHIT!
Taker: ..didn't know.. you were... praticing.. **DEATH RATTLE**
Cole: ...um, Undertaker counters the boot with a headbutt!! WOW!

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JBL: omg! Are you ok, Mark?
Taker: .............
JBL: Mark?
Taker: ..........
JBL: Mark? ..If I give this title and the Seinfield DVD set, then will you get up?
Taker: ......................... can't talk, 'selling'.

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Bashams (while bashing Taker): You.. will.. watch.. Bradshaw... Macarena.. like it... or... .... .. not.. STUFF!

fin.

[tucsonspeed6]

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RVD: COSGROVE, SAVE ME! I'M FALLING! SAVE ME, COSGROVE, SAVE ME! ...... OK, NEVER MIND! *splat*

Hell, I'll even give a rep for the reference...

[Gone Mad]

^^ I'm not sure, I should know this, but is it Team America?

[Nowhere Man]

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RVD is the first to test out the new wire-flying systems for WWE's first superhero movie.

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Unfortunately, WWE had to cut costs by the time it was Eddie's turn.

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Don't knock on Booker T. You'd have passed out too if you had to stand around the Bashams with their pits in the air.

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WWE's second attempt at the Diva Search wasn't quite as glamorous as the first.

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JBL just hopes he can get this over with quick before anyone notices he's not really the Rock.

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Taker was shocked and apalled by the horrible things JBL was saying to that poor turnbuckle.

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RVD: Oh, Jesus look out! The wires broke!!!

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Apparently the boy in the Metallica T-Shirt had an entirely different opinion as to what "Ride the Lightning" meant.

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Holly: Take THAT, John Wilkes Booth! How dare you kill the President!

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Booker: My contacts fell out! I can't see a thing, Kurt!
Eddie: ....

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Good to see Steven Tyler is in the mood for the Holidays....and got a boob job.

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"Okay, NM hasn't watched Smackdown in months. So who the hell are we again?"

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This poor girl had no idea that when Big Show says he wants to eat you, he's not talking about pleasuring anyone.

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Oh yeah, Orlando thought it would be really funny to put that banana peel in the ring. Now look what happened.

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JBL: Taker? Oh come on! I'm not THAT boring!
Taker: Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.........

[PorkSoda]

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RVD's "Sting's Crow" gimmick ends in tragedy.

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Doug: I
Danny: Love
Orlando: Your
JBL: EARLOBES!
Doug: I
Danny: Tug
Orlando: Your
JBL: Professor!

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Eddie: Guys, are you sure this is how we play Londen Bridges Fallin Down?

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Up next on VH1, the timeline of Micheal Jackson.

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JBL: *Pointing finger in Taker's face* I came into this world as a muppet! Look into these eyes, you'll see that they are COOGLY!

[El Santo]

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And the year's most embarassing moment went to RVD when, during a dramatic leap from the rafters, his tights got stuck in the trusses.

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The whole goose-stepping gimmick got out of hand when JBL introduced his new "Skinhead" faction.

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Th Bashams help unhook Eddie from the rapelling cable during Year's Most Embarassing Moment #2.

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Miz: "Alright, Justice, I know we're dressed up as saucy tarts and all, but next time you put your hand on my ass, I'll kill you."

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He may be the world's most unworthy WWE champ, but no one did a Russian Dance better than JBL.

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As JBL's promo entered the third hour, Mark Calloway decided to rest his eyes for a second.

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RVD: "So, you see... no wires!"
Kenzo: "Whoa!"

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God, I knew O-Town was gay, but...

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Al Snow wowed the crowd with his "Little Richard" impersonation.

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Eddie: "No, seriously man... those chicks we saw earlier on stage, they were men, esse."
Booker: "Oh.... Oh, God. .... OH, GOD...."

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Even Referee Nick Patrick was stunned when Mrs. Claus reacted with cat-like reflexes.

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Joy had no idea what to do after Luther fell asleep in the middle of his own promo.

[Hired Hitman]

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Nick Patrick: That's a great pose, but you forgot to move your top to the side a bit.

[Champion of Europa]

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One Night In Chyna begat a whole new trend.

[Savio]

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"When you were drunk, week nights on UPN."

[Corkscrewed]

I've been busy over the past week. Sorry for the tardiness, but I think I've regained some creativity. :) Comments appreciated as always.

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It was an unfortunate first scalping incident in over 200 years when RVD's hair accidentally got caught in the scaffolding.

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It was a raucous celebration, but Wayne Brady couldn't help but think he'd be the next guy that the Alabama Chain Gang would turn on.

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Sometimes, just to have fun, the Bashams would toss random Latinos up agains the glass ceiling and giggle at the resulting THUMP.

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Somehow, the New Godfather's Hos wasn't as much of a hit as the first.

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Hilarity ensues when JBL slips on a banana and gets hit by a cup of beer at the same time.

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JBL: "And you're not taking my belt and that's FINAL! And you remember that, Mr. Top Turnbuckle!!!"
Taker: "You got into RVD's stash too?"

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Kenzo takes the lead in the first-ever Rob-Tossing Championships.

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So these are the clowns that decide the BCS.

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Nothing was more devastating than Hardcore's patented Curvefart.

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Eddie & Booker: "You actually watched the One Night in China trailer???"

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Santa's daughter was noticeably pissed when the Easter Bunny took out her dad.

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Luther: "And that's why I'm going to beat--"
Ref: "By George, I have hands too!!!"
Luther: "Dammit, not now!"

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Big Show grinningly re-enacts his own "Melissa incident."
(rep for the reference)

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Taker was never a vocal protester of JBL's goose stepping... until now.

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*after JBL clocks Taker in the head*
JBL: "And that's for stealing all my clothes and underwear!!!"

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One Night in Taker was no better than any of its predecessors.

[Corkscrewed]

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Somewhere in Minnesotta, Brock suffers three more heart attacks.