Official "TNA IMPACT!" Thread

[James Steele]

Yeah, that way we can dicuss how much TNA blows this week in one thread instead of 30.

[Nervous Ferret]

yeah, I saw it for the first time ever like 2 hours ago, wtf that Sharkboy thing is a fucking perv, and wtf at TEAM CANADA:

1. Cheesy rip-off of TEAM NERVOUS FERRET
2. GAYEST NAME EVER
3. WTF is with wearing the baseball unis

[Gouda]

I think Team Canada is a mighty fine name! :shifty:

I don't get FSN.

[loopydate]

Team Canada rules. The Canada-versus-United States gimmick is way played out, but Williams, Roode, Young, and Devine are all really good in the ring, so I forgive 'em.

I wasn't impressed with Impact this week. Why, exactly, did they bring back the Harris Brothers? And did the world really need another giant tag team? And I was really unimpressed with Trytan. And that whole Siaki/Apolo/Kash/Hoyt thing was pretty lame.

Did anyone else think that the best sell job of the day was Traci? I mean, all she got was her ass bit, but she "favored" it the rest of the night, unlike the wrestlers who take a big-time move, then are on their feet fifteen seconds later.

Next week's show should be good, with that X match they were talking about for the shot at Daniels.

The PPV card is pretty bad right now. Dustin Rhodes versus Bobby Roode? Apolo vs. Lance Hoyt? Who on earth is booking this? The six-man cage match could be interesting, but probably will just be a big clusterfuck of brawling moves to protect the boys. Did they announce what the other cage match will be? I hope it's the X match, but it probably won't be. The AMW/Team Canada match should be really good, too, although I think Young and Devine is probably the weakest TC combination.

[James Steele]

:lol: I laughed my ass off at Trytan. Seriously, could they rip off Brock Lesnar any more? At least don't use the exact finisher and then name it the exact same way (letter-number)

F-5 > T-3

[Nervous Ferret]

Also the 6-sided ring is mad annoyingggg

[Kane Knight]

Is it me, or is the commentary team mad pathetic?

I mean, I know there isn't much to say about the cardboard enigma that is Jeff Hardy, but at the point that the best you can pull off is 5 minutes talking about his partner's fluency in English leading to good communication, you REALLY need to learn to work on your own communication skills.

[Kane Knight]

And ripping off Queen for The DOA theme...:wtf:

Though he does have a fat bottom.

[James Steele]

If it wasn't for AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels, Elix Skipper, Kid Kash, Shark Boy, and few others I could care less about TNAwful. (clever aint I? )


oh and I forgot the...


POUNCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Kane Knight]

:love:

[Nervous Ferret]

:heart:

[Kane Knight]

(heart)

[RemyRed]

If it wasn't for AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels, Elix Skipper, Kid Kash, Shark Boy, and few others I could care less about TNAwful. (clever aint I? )


oh and I forgot the...


POUNCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PERIOD!!

[Innovator]

Don West has an orgasm for every spot in every match. At least when JR does it, it means something.

"OH MY GOD DROPKICK BY JEFF HARDY! THE CHARASMATIC ENIGMA! HARDY!

[James Steele]

I don't know why they just get rid of West and make the announce team Mike Tenay & Shane Douglas.

[KayfabeMan]

Shark Boy is the highlight of the show, as usual.

They should just give him a talk segment like Beefcake, Michaels, or Piper.

They could call it "The Shark Tank", and it could go 45 minutes - leaving enough time for them to attempt to book ONE good match for a change.

[KayfabeMan]

Probably a Shark Boy match as well.

[Kane Knight]

Shark Boy is the highlight of the show, as usual.

They should just give him a talk segment like Beefcake, Michaels, or Piper.

They could call it "The Shark Tank", and it could go 45 minutes - leaving enough time for them to attempt to book ONE good match for a change.
a good match? You're giving them too much credit.

[The Mackem]

You can tell that Don West guy used to do infomercials. What's Schiavone up to nowadays?

[PullMyFinger]

I hate Mike Tenay. I'd rather just have Shane Douglas and Scott Hudson (hey, at least he's wayyyyyyyy better than Mike Tenay).

[PullMyFinger]

You can tell that Don West guy used to do infomercials. What's Schiavone up to nowadays?
I'll never forget the day I turn on Nitro and he's telling fans what a shoot is. I was like "oh my."

[Kane Knight]

You can tell that Don West guy used to do infomercials. What's Schiavone up to nowadays?
Informercials.

But much better ones.

[Shadow]

Is it me, or is the commentary team mad pathetic?

I mean, I know there isn't much to say about the cardboard enigma that is Jeff Hardy, but at the point that the best you can pull off is 5 minutes talking about his partner's fluency in English leading to good communication, you REALLY need to learn to work on your own communication skills.

Don't get me started on that whole...Charasmatic Enigma crap Tenay keeps labeling Jeff with. There's not much of an enigma when it comes to Jeff. Really. There's no mystery to Jeff Hardy. Shut up about it Tenay! Now!

Someone going to make a charasma joke or not?

[Kane Knight]

Don't get me started on that whole...Charasmatic Enigma crap Tenay keeps labeling Jeff with. There's not much of an enigma when it comes to Jeff. Really. There's no mystery to Jeff Hardy. Shut up about it Tenay! Now!

Someone going to make a charasma joke or not?
No...

....

....
....

....

Or Charisma. :shifty:

[Kane Knight]

I am weak.

[KayfabeMan]

I am weak.

So are TNA's IMPACT! line-ups.

:shifty:

[loopydate]

Hi-oh!

[James Steele]

BA-ZING

[Funky Fly]

If I weren't so utterly tired, I'd rip your balls off for stretching the page.

[Kane Knight]

So are TNA's IMPACT! line-ups.

:shifty:
That was below the belt.

But true.

[Shadow]

Very true.

As Kane Knight once said, they can't even use Jeff Hardy right.

[Kane Knight]

Yeah, as Kane Knight also said, all it takes it sticking him up someplace high and shoving him,

[Kane Knight]

I think they should give him a Spider-Man outfit and have him jump from rooftop to rooftop.

[PullMyFinger]

I think they should give him a Spider-Man outfit and have him jump from rooftop to rooftop.
:lol:

[Shadow]

I think they should give him a Spider-Man outfit and have him jump from rooftop to rooftop.

Don't give him ideas. He'll probably do it.

[Kane Knight]

Don't give him ideas. He'll probably do it.
So?

[Shadow]

So?

Arg!

[SuperSlim]

Impact blew majorly... crappy

[PullMyFinger]

Why the FUCK is TNA so shitty? Last night's episode almost made me puke. FUCK! Just give me the booking job, and I'll throw in a better show than the shit they put out!

[Kane Knight]

Arg!
What, I thought you wanted him pushed?

[Kane Knight]

Why the FUCK is TNA so shitty? Last night's episode almost made me puke. FUCK! Just give me the booking job, and I'll throw in a better show than the shit they put out!
They could get better ratings if they showed Randy Orton taking a shit in someone's bag.

[Shadow]

What, I thought you wanted him pushed?

Well yeah I do...just not off a cliff.

[PullMyFinger]

They could get better ratings if they showed Randy Orton taking a shit in someone's bag.
See, this is the sad part, you're actually right. Normally, one would think you're just fucking around, but at this point, no.

[Gone Mad]

I personally wanna see Jeff Hardy be pushed.... off a roof. He should take Edge with him. You know... make it interpromotional.

West: "MY GOD! THERE HE GOES THE GREATEST YOUNGSTER IN THIS SPORT OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING TODAY THE CHARISMATIC ENIGMA, ALL THE GIRLS LOVE THIS--"

Tenay: "man, he isn't that grea-- WOW! JARRETT WITH THE STROKE! DEVASTATING MANUEVER ! IT'S OVER NOW! "

[Kane Knight]

Well yeah I do...just not off a cliff.
Howabout into a bus?

[Kane Knight]

See, this is the sad part, you're actually right. Normally, one would think you're just fucking around, but at this point, no.
I wish I WAS fucking around.

MAN, do I wish I was fucking around.

Heat is Jarrett and Rhodes taking turns shitting on paper.

[Kane Knight]

I personally wanna see Jeff Hardy be pushed.... off a roof. He should take Edge with him. You know... make it interpromotional.

West: "MY GOD! THERE HE GOES THE GREATEST YOUNGSTER IN THIS SPORT OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING TODAY THE CHARISMATIC ENIGMA, ALL THE GIRLS LOVE THIS--"

Tenay: "man, he isn't that grea-- WOW! JARRETT WITH THE STROKE! DEVASTATING MANUEVER ! IT'S OVER NOW! "
The Charismatic chumpstain.

The Purple pancake.

The REAL flatliner.

[Kane Knight]

Also, I hate to admit it, but I watched TNA TWICE this week...At 3 on Friday and Midnight Saturday...And I STILL don't remember any highlights. About the only thing that sticks out is actually hearing Queen get ripped off again.

When a theme song is the most meorable moment of a show you watched twice...Something's amiss.