Chavo Classic
08-03-2005, 10:36 AM
Welcome to my Crap Corner. This month, I’ll be addressing the state of the WWE and its flagship show – Raw. The situation with Raw is that we all believe that it is simply not as good as it used to be. Every weekend I’d happily sit by the television at 10 o’clock, tune into Sky Sports and be happily satisfied for at least two hours. Recently, I watch Raw only as part of a Plan B – if there’s nothing better to do. But why is this?
It would be very easy for me to slag off every popular smark reason why Raw is not as entertaining as it used to be. Too much HHH, too few matches and JR barking like a rabid dog. But instead, I’ve actually decided to conduct some legitimate research and investigate why exactly I think that Raw has gone so dramatically downhill. This was possible by randomly digging a tape of Raw my collection, reviewing the contents and comparing this episode of Raw to the recent attempts of 2005. This Raw just so happened to be filmed sometime in March 2001, several weeks before Wrestlemania X7 and in-front of a live studio audience of the Staples Centre. Let us begin…
Quick recap of last week handicap match between the Rock and the team of Haku and Rikishi. The Rock’s manager Debra, who is also Austin’s wife at this point, is attacked by Rikishi after the match but Austin makes the save. Austin and Rock stare down after the match.
Raw starts, with that old rap introduction – wow, I’ve missed hearing this. Massive pyro explosions and welcomed to a live Staples centre by JR and Paul Heyman (who’s comically wearing an XFL hat). And then we are shown the crowd at WWF New York – lol, I forgot all about this place. It looks fairly rammed in there. Anyway, straight on with the show, wow, they’re not wasting any time here as…
Match one
The Hardy Boyz come out accompanied by Lita, and guess what? No, Matt isn’t beating on Lita, they’re actually Tag Team champions! Lita looks very hot though – it looks like she’s piled on the muscle since then. Next out to face the champions is the team of X-Pac and Justin Credible.
Match starts with Matt and Justin in the ring, a few technical moves and Jeff is tagged in for the acrobatics. He looks in very good shape and is pulling off some great offense. Double Hardy leg drop and senton splash onto Credible, followed by a Whistle in the Wind from the top rope into X-Pac. The crowd is really into this, and is even chanting for Lita to get involved. It’s strange not hearing chants for ‘Lita’ without the word ‘slut’ following them.
Twist of Fate by Matt on Credible, and Jeff goes up for the Swanton. WOW! He hit that perfectly! But Albert comes out of no-where and interferes. Baldo-bomb onto Matt and Gorilla presses Jeff over the barrier. Looks like we have a new alliance here – yep, you guessed it, the start of the X-Factor
Winner by DQ and still champions – The Hardy Boyz
Backstage and Angle (complete with fuzzy hair, he looks adorable :D) is waiting in the parking lot. A limo pulls up and out steps Regal, and he’s informed us it’s his first day as Commissioner and he’s going down to the ring to address his fans. Angle chases after Regal insisting that he use his new powers to give him a re-match against the current WWF champion… The Rock! Regal doesn’t reply and Angle is left kicking the ground.
Dennis Hopper from Apocalypse Now is shown at ringside. No apparent reason why, I guess that the WWF of old just liked to name-drop a lot.
Backstage and it’s Eddie, Malenko and Saturn. They’re talking about how the Radicalz entered the WWF together and how they’ve been betrayed. There’s no Benoit in the shot, so I guess that they’re referring to him. Eddie and Dean exit the room, and leave Saturn behind. Benoit comes out of the dark like a stalker and destroys Saturn.
And we’re back at ringside, as the new commissioner, Regal marches towards the ring. His arrogant wave to the crowd is hilarious. JR calls Regal a “royal pain in the ass” as Regal gets on the stick and address the Staples centre audience. He informs us, that as his first act as commissioner, he’s sanctioned a particular re-match… yes, it’s Angle taking on the Rock! But just then, Jericho’s music hits and the first undisputed world champion comes out, dressed in that sparkly silver jacket, sporting mean Spike Dudley facial hair and with the Intercontinental Championship around his waist. He’s massively over; the crowd are eating this up. Y2J yells that Regal should “SHUT THE HELL UP”, “How dare you be-smirch me” Regal replies. Some good banter ensues and the segment ends with a long stare-down. This is great stuff, both guys get over and it seems the seeds of a feud have been planted.
Match two
Christian hits the ring. He looks like the true geek in his bright yellow t-shirt and wearing those custom Oakley sunglasses which extend over the back of his head. Fantastic stuff. Next out in D’Von, in his glasses and camouflage ring attire. Very average match ends with Bubba hitting the ring and dispossessing Christian of a steel chair before hitting the 3D. Not the best match, but building a towards a solid TLC match at Mania.
Winner - D’Von by pinfall.
We’re backstage again, and a second limo pulls up. Out steps Vince and his new squeeze Trish, who’s playing the giggling, dumb blonde role a little too well. Vince escorts the beautiful Trish to the entrance and informs us that tonight, the WWF is going to witness it’s very first live sex show. Ugh, this better be going somewhere.
Backstage also are Eddie and Malenko. The pair are walking towards the ring when suddenly Benoit jumps and attacks Malenko, knocking him to the ground and beating him with a lead pipe. Eddie, playing the cowardly role to perfection, is locked behind the door and is unable to help as Benoit lays into Malenko a few more times. Looks like we’ve got an encounter between Eddie and Benoit coming up soon.
Match three
Benoit against Eddie in what promises to be a very good match. Surprisingly, the crowd don’t seem too interested in the match although it is a great technical affair with both men executing various suplexes and missing their top rope finishers. I have to mention that Eddie’s mullet look phenomenal as well, it’s like the mane of a Lion. Lol. Benoit captures the win and leaves Eddie motionless in the ring.
Winner– Benoit via pinfall
Backstage again and this time we’re in Regal’s makeshift office. The Coach questions Regal about tonight’s plans, and the Commish sets up a match for the ages – its’Y2J in a handicap match, against the entire RTC stable. This could be very interesting.
No Chance in Hell hits and down comes Vince accompanied by Trish for the ‘live sex show’. Dennis Hopper is actually smiling as Vince lays Trish down in the middle of the ring and then lays down next to her. Trish then mutters something in Vince’s ear, who then smiles and informs us that they’re going to go backstage and continue this encounter privately. Thank God! But before they can, Vince’s music starts again. Vince is irate – “stop my dam music, dammit!” But it’s not for him – it’s for Shane. Shane steps into the ring and nails Vince, then nails Regal as the commish attempts to help out. Wow, the crowd is really into Shane. They popped ten times louder for this than any point during the last match. Idiots.
Match four
RTC versus Jericho in a squash match typical of a 4 on 1 handicap. Jericho manages to get a few shots in and attempts a Liontamer (the old Walls of Jericho rather than the lame Boston Crab modification he uses today) while the member of the RTC are arguing outside the ring. This match is over after about eight minutes as Val hits a clothesline on a distracted Jericho. Regal, sitting below that hilarious portrait of the Queen, watches smugly on his monitor backstage.
Winner – Val Venis of Right to Censor via pinfall
Backstage, Austin confronts Angle and warns him that if any harm comes to Debra, who is currently acting as the Rock’s manager, then he’s going to have to stomp a mud-hole in his ass.
Match five
Straight into a match after the commercial break, and it’s a match for the hardcore championship. A very lean and muscular Big Show comes down to the ring wearing the battered championship belt over one of his enormous shoulders. I’m not kidding, but he looks in tremendous shape. Meanwhile, his opponent the Undertaker is backstage about to get on his Harley and ride down to the ring when HHH attacks.
HHH places the unfolded chair on UT’s neck and sits down to confront him. “You’re the guy who makes people famous? Well, I’m already famous, and you know what for? I’m famous for crippling people!” This is great stuff. I’ve never seen the UT dominated like this and HHH comes across as a very serious and menacing threat.
Before Kane can help out, HHH is gone. But what the fuck!? Big Show has obviously gotten tired of standing in the ring and has come backstage and taken his aggressions out on Kane. He chokeslams Kane through a table as both brothers are left helpless on the concrete.
Winner and still champion – Big Show by default
And now we’re live from WWF New York with the APA. How times have changed? Bradshaw is tossing back brews with Farrooq on the other side of the country. He looks so very very different with his long, greasy, black hair. I miss the APA, dam!
Match six
How has Test managed the steal the European championship, and why does it say ‘Test- European Champion’ on the screen? And why has Lillian just introduced him as the European Champion? I don’t remember this! But anyway, I guess he must be European champion. And here comes the jobber… Raven!
Anyway, this is a total squash match as Test dominates and pins Raven with a pumphandle slam in under three minutes. JR announces that “Test might be on his way to becoming the best European Champion we’ve ever had!” :shifty:
Winner and still champion- Test
Match seven
Its time for the main event, and it’s for the greatest prize of all - The Heavyweight Championship. Angle is down first and is followed by the Rock. It’s an awesome reaction for the Rock, and surprisingly, his first piece of screen-time for the night. This match has amazing intensity, as Rock and Angle battle up the ramp and into the crowd. Whoever said the Rock isn’t a great wrestler should watch this. Rock and Angle are pulling out all the stops, it’s like a PPV match!
Angle misses the moonsault and Rock counters with a series of devastating punches. BAM BAM BAM! But the ref is down and there’s no-one to make to pin after Rocky hits the people’s elbow. Rock is livid, but then is attacked from behind and put in the Ankle lock. Debra tried to intervene, and Kurt shoves her off, stands over her and threatens to put her in the lock too. BAM! Austin comes to the ring and lays out Kurt. The bell is being rung over and over as Stone Cold lays into Kurt, and then as the Rock gets to his feet, he stuns him. This is amazing stuff. Looks like Austin has completely snapped over the danger Rock has exposed Debra to. End of show as Austin storms back up the ramp and Debra is left holding up the Rock’s neck. “What is going through the mind of the Texas Rattle Snake?” JR yells.
Winner - everyone
Analysis.
Without a doubt, this Raw was probably the most refreshing piece of wrestling television I’ve seen for a while. To compare this episode to any of the Raws shown this year would be an injustice, it was just that good.
There are a number of reasons why this was the case –
1) There were seven matches in total. I don’t think Raw was tried to squeeze so much action into a two hour slot like this for a long time. This gave the talent from all positions on the roster, whether in the tag team division, mid-card and main event, a chance to shine in the ring. Not all the matches were particularly long (e.g. Test versus Raven) but they were significant in quantity. Noteably, three of the matches were also title matches. I don’t think a PPV even gets three title matches anymore. It helped to go straight into a match rather than have a ten minute monologue from HHH to start.
2) The commentary actually enhanced the product rather than taking away from it. JR was at his best and Heyman tried his almightiest to put just about everyone over, even jobbers like Credible and Raven. It was nice not to hear the words ‘puppies’ or ‘bahgawd’. Having the commentators actually call the match rather than put over the main event later in the show was also very refreshing. I don’t know what has happened to JR since, but I’m going to look at him in a very different way after seeing this.
3) There were consistent minor storylines running throughout the show, such as Angle’s pursuit of a rematch against the Rock and Benoit slowly taking out each member of the Radicalz. Today, Raw simply seems like a highlight show of progressing angles and storylines. The minor storylines meant the show ran a lot smoother and with a lot more cohesion. It also kept me interested, especially during moments when I wasn’t particularly bothered by what was on screen (Test, anyone?).
4) The promos and skits were entertaining – Jericho and Regal were on top form and rattled off some great banter. Not only did this push along their feud, but it also helped put them both over a higher level. This is how real feuds should be built up.
On the other hand, it is worth noting that this is the WWF/E and there were always going to be problems. First, the segment with Vince and Trish and the live sex show was pointless – nothing happened at all. It would’ve been a whole lot easier and better to just have Shane attack Vince once he stepped out of the limo with Trish, at least then we would’ve had more time for Raven and Christian’s matches.
Then again, this great showing of Raw could be an anomaly. I’m quite aware it was filmed just a couple of weeks before Wrestlemania X7, which is typically the peak of the wrestling calendar. So naturally, a lot of thought and effort goes into making each and every Raw and Smackdown shown in the month before Mania very special and memorable. Regardless, I believe that if the WWE showed this Raw as a PPV now, it would get as good a response as many of the offerings this year has provided. It was a good, solid show with plenty of surprises and shocks and some blockbuster matches worthy of at least four stars (Angle versus Rock & Eddie versus Benoit).
It would be very easy for me to slag off every popular smark reason why Raw is not as entertaining as it used to be. Too much HHH, too few matches and JR barking like a rabid dog. But instead, I’ve actually decided to conduct some legitimate research and investigate why exactly I think that Raw has gone so dramatically downhill. This was possible by randomly digging a tape of Raw my collection, reviewing the contents and comparing this episode of Raw to the recent attempts of 2005. This Raw just so happened to be filmed sometime in March 2001, several weeks before Wrestlemania X7 and in-front of a live studio audience of the Staples Centre. Let us begin…
Quick recap of last week handicap match between the Rock and the team of Haku and Rikishi. The Rock’s manager Debra, who is also Austin’s wife at this point, is attacked by Rikishi after the match but Austin makes the save. Austin and Rock stare down after the match.
Raw starts, with that old rap introduction – wow, I’ve missed hearing this. Massive pyro explosions and welcomed to a live Staples centre by JR and Paul Heyman (who’s comically wearing an XFL hat). And then we are shown the crowd at WWF New York – lol, I forgot all about this place. It looks fairly rammed in there. Anyway, straight on with the show, wow, they’re not wasting any time here as…
Match one
The Hardy Boyz come out accompanied by Lita, and guess what? No, Matt isn’t beating on Lita, they’re actually Tag Team champions! Lita looks very hot though – it looks like she’s piled on the muscle since then. Next out to face the champions is the team of X-Pac and Justin Credible.
Match starts with Matt and Justin in the ring, a few technical moves and Jeff is tagged in for the acrobatics. He looks in very good shape and is pulling off some great offense. Double Hardy leg drop and senton splash onto Credible, followed by a Whistle in the Wind from the top rope into X-Pac. The crowd is really into this, and is even chanting for Lita to get involved. It’s strange not hearing chants for ‘Lita’ without the word ‘slut’ following them.
Twist of Fate by Matt on Credible, and Jeff goes up for the Swanton. WOW! He hit that perfectly! But Albert comes out of no-where and interferes. Baldo-bomb onto Matt and Gorilla presses Jeff over the barrier. Looks like we have a new alliance here – yep, you guessed it, the start of the X-Factor
Winner by DQ and still champions – The Hardy Boyz
Backstage and Angle (complete with fuzzy hair, he looks adorable :D) is waiting in the parking lot. A limo pulls up and out steps Regal, and he’s informed us it’s his first day as Commissioner and he’s going down to the ring to address his fans. Angle chases after Regal insisting that he use his new powers to give him a re-match against the current WWF champion… The Rock! Regal doesn’t reply and Angle is left kicking the ground.
Dennis Hopper from Apocalypse Now is shown at ringside. No apparent reason why, I guess that the WWF of old just liked to name-drop a lot.
Backstage and it’s Eddie, Malenko and Saturn. They’re talking about how the Radicalz entered the WWF together and how they’ve been betrayed. There’s no Benoit in the shot, so I guess that they’re referring to him. Eddie and Dean exit the room, and leave Saturn behind. Benoit comes out of the dark like a stalker and destroys Saturn.
And we’re back at ringside, as the new commissioner, Regal marches towards the ring. His arrogant wave to the crowd is hilarious. JR calls Regal a “royal pain in the ass” as Regal gets on the stick and address the Staples centre audience. He informs us, that as his first act as commissioner, he’s sanctioned a particular re-match… yes, it’s Angle taking on the Rock! But just then, Jericho’s music hits and the first undisputed world champion comes out, dressed in that sparkly silver jacket, sporting mean Spike Dudley facial hair and with the Intercontinental Championship around his waist. He’s massively over; the crowd are eating this up. Y2J yells that Regal should “SHUT THE HELL UP”, “How dare you be-smirch me” Regal replies. Some good banter ensues and the segment ends with a long stare-down. This is great stuff, both guys get over and it seems the seeds of a feud have been planted.
Match two
Christian hits the ring. He looks like the true geek in his bright yellow t-shirt and wearing those custom Oakley sunglasses which extend over the back of his head. Fantastic stuff. Next out in D’Von, in his glasses and camouflage ring attire. Very average match ends with Bubba hitting the ring and dispossessing Christian of a steel chair before hitting the 3D. Not the best match, but building a towards a solid TLC match at Mania.
Winner - D’Von by pinfall.
We’re backstage again, and a second limo pulls up. Out steps Vince and his new squeeze Trish, who’s playing the giggling, dumb blonde role a little too well. Vince escorts the beautiful Trish to the entrance and informs us that tonight, the WWF is going to witness it’s very first live sex show. Ugh, this better be going somewhere.
Backstage also are Eddie and Malenko. The pair are walking towards the ring when suddenly Benoit jumps and attacks Malenko, knocking him to the ground and beating him with a lead pipe. Eddie, playing the cowardly role to perfection, is locked behind the door and is unable to help as Benoit lays into Malenko a few more times. Looks like we’ve got an encounter between Eddie and Benoit coming up soon.
Match three
Benoit against Eddie in what promises to be a very good match. Surprisingly, the crowd don’t seem too interested in the match although it is a great technical affair with both men executing various suplexes and missing their top rope finishers. I have to mention that Eddie’s mullet look phenomenal as well, it’s like the mane of a Lion. Lol. Benoit captures the win and leaves Eddie motionless in the ring.
Winner– Benoit via pinfall
Backstage again and this time we’re in Regal’s makeshift office. The Coach questions Regal about tonight’s plans, and the Commish sets up a match for the ages – its’Y2J in a handicap match, against the entire RTC stable. This could be very interesting.
No Chance in Hell hits and down comes Vince accompanied by Trish for the ‘live sex show’. Dennis Hopper is actually smiling as Vince lays Trish down in the middle of the ring and then lays down next to her. Trish then mutters something in Vince’s ear, who then smiles and informs us that they’re going to go backstage and continue this encounter privately. Thank God! But before they can, Vince’s music starts again. Vince is irate – “stop my dam music, dammit!” But it’s not for him – it’s for Shane. Shane steps into the ring and nails Vince, then nails Regal as the commish attempts to help out. Wow, the crowd is really into Shane. They popped ten times louder for this than any point during the last match. Idiots.
Match four
RTC versus Jericho in a squash match typical of a 4 on 1 handicap. Jericho manages to get a few shots in and attempts a Liontamer (the old Walls of Jericho rather than the lame Boston Crab modification he uses today) while the member of the RTC are arguing outside the ring. This match is over after about eight minutes as Val hits a clothesline on a distracted Jericho. Regal, sitting below that hilarious portrait of the Queen, watches smugly on his monitor backstage.
Winner – Val Venis of Right to Censor via pinfall
Backstage, Austin confronts Angle and warns him that if any harm comes to Debra, who is currently acting as the Rock’s manager, then he’s going to have to stomp a mud-hole in his ass.
Match five
Straight into a match after the commercial break, and it’s a match for the hardcore championship. A very lean and muscular Big Show comes down to the ring wearing the battered championship belt over one of his enormous shoulders. I’m not kidding, but he looks in tremendous shape. Meanwhile, his opponent the Undertaker is backstage about to get on his Harley and ride down to the ring when HHH attacks.
HHH places the unfolded chair on UT’s neck and sits down to confront him. “You’re the guy who makes people famous? Well, I’m already famous, and you know what for? I’m famous for crippling people!” This is great stuff. I’ve never seen the UT dominated like this and HHH comes across as a very serious and menacing threat.
Before Kane can help out, HHH is gone. But what the fuck!? Big Show has obviously gotten tired of standing in the ring and has come backstage and taken his aggressions out on Kane. He chokeslams Kane through a table as both brothers are left helpless on the concrete.
Winner and still champion – Big Show by default
And now we’re live from WWF New York with the APA. How times have changed? Bradshaw is tossing back brews with Farrooq on the other side of the country. He looks so very very different with his long, greasy, black hair. I miss the APA, dam!
Match six
How has Test managed the steal the European championship, and why does it say ‘Test- European Champion’ on the screen? And why has Lillian just introduced him as the European Champion? I don’t remember this! But anyway, I guess he must be European champion. And here comes the jobber… Raven!
Anyway, this is a total squash match as Test dominates and pins Raven with a pumphandle slam in under three minutes. JR announces that “Test might be on his way to becoming the best European Champion we’ve ever had!” :shifty:
Winner and still champion- Test
Match seven
Its time for the main event, and it’s for the greatest prize of all - The Heavyweight Championship. Angle is down first and is followed by the Rock. It’s an awesome reaction for the Rock, and surprisingly, his first piece of screen-time for the night. This match has amazing intensity, as Rock and Angle battle up the ramp and into the crowd. Whoever said the Rock isn’t a great wrestler should watch this. Rock and Angle are pulling out all the stops, it’s like a PPV match!
Angle misses the moonsault and Rock counters with a series of devastating punches. BAM BAM BAM! But the ref is down and there’s no-one to make to pin after Rocky hits the people’s elbow. Rock is livid, but then is attacked from behind and put in the Ankle lock. Debra tried to intervene, and Kurt shoves her off, stands over her and threatens to put her in the lock too. BAM! Austin comes to the ring and lays out Kurt. The bell is being rung over and over as Stone Cold lays into Kurt, and then as the Rock gets to his feet, he stuns him. This is amazing stuff. Looks like Austin has completely snapped over the danger Rock has exposed Debra to. End of show as Austin storms back up the ramp and Debra is left holding up the Rock’s neck. “What is going through the mind of the Texas Rattle Snake?” JR yells.
Winner - everyone
Analysis.
Without a doubt, this Raw was probably the most refreshing piece of wrestling television I’ve seen for a while. To compare this episode to any of the Raws shown this year would be an injustice, it was just that good.
There are a number of reasons why this was the case –
1) There were seven matches in total. I don’t think Raw was tried to squeeze so much action into a two hour slot like this for a long time. This gave the talent from all positions on the roster, whether in the tag team division, mid-card and main event, a chance to shine in the ring. Not all the matches were particularly long (e.g. Test versus Raven) but they were significant in quantity. Noteably, three of the matches were also title matches. I don’t think a PPV even gets three title matches anymore. It helped to go straight into a match rather than have a ten minute monologue from HHH to start.
2) The commentary actually enhanced the product rather than taking away from it. JR was at his best and Heyman tried his almightiest to put just about everyone over, even jobbers like Credible and Raven. It was nice not to hear the words ‘puppies’ or ‘bahgawd’. Having the commentators actually call the match rather than put over the main event later in the show was also very refreshing. I don’t know what has happened to JR since, but I’m going to look at him in a very different way after seeing this.
3) There were consistent minor storylines running throughout the show, such as Angle’s pursuit of a rematch against the Rock and Benoit slowly taking out each member of the Radicalz. Today, Raw simply seems like a highlight show of progressing angles and storylines. The minor storylines meant the show ran a lot smoother and with a lot more cohesion. It also kept me interested, especially during moments when I wasn’t particularly bothered by what was on screen (Test, anyone?).
4) The promos and skits were entertaining – Jericho and Regal were on top form and rattled off some great banter. Not only did this push along their feud, but it also helped put them both over a higher level. This is how real feuds should be built up.
On the other hand, it is worth noting that this is the WWF/E and there were always going to be problems. First, the segment with Vince and Trish and the live sex show was pointless – nothing happened at all. It would’ve been a whole lot easier and better to just have Shane attack Vince once he stepped out of the limo with Trish, at least then we would’ve had more time for Raven and Christian’s matches.
Then again, this great showing of Raw could be an anomaly. I’m quite aware it was filmed just a couple of weeks before Wrestlemania X7, which is typically the peak of the wrestling calendar. So naturally, a lot of thought and effort goes into making each and every Raw and Smackdown shown in the month before Mania very special and memorable. Regardless, I believe that if the WWE showed this Raw as a PPV now, it would get as good a response as many of the offerings this year has provided. It was a good, solid show with plenty of surprises and shocks and some blockbuster matches worthy of at least four stars (Angle versus Rock & Eddie versus Benoit).