How would you...

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>...book the Raw Homecoming episode on USA?

With all the legends and returnees and whatnot, it should be a pretty packed show...so I'm just curious as to how you guys would go about booking the show.

I'll try and do mine later on once I finish this stupid school project that I've procrastinated on</font> :o

[Jaton]

An hour of Triple H promos, another hour for Hogan poses, 30 minute Iron Man, 20 minutes for Cena/Bischoff, 10 minutes for everything else.

[Destor]

Your show sucks Jaton, I'm not gonna watch.

[Chavo Classic]

Three words for you...













LEGEND













BATTLE














ROYAL!

[Chavo Classic]

:shifty:

[Jaton]

My show is realistic of what is likely to happen.

[Chavo Classic]

Not even HHH would book himself an hour of yappity yap

[Chavo Classic]

...Hogan though? hmmmmmm

[Jaton]

Fine. 30 minutes of HHH. I forgot to factor in commercial time.

[Chavo Classic]

Serious though. I have no idea how they are going to book this. And if the internet smarks don't know, then I'm fairly sure the WWE writers and bookers won't. This could be one clumsy episode (saved only by some hot matches from the likes of Angle, HBK, Hardy and *gasps* Edge)

[Destor]

Dont forget Hogans amzing promos!

[Chavo Classic]

...brother

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>Alright, well this is kinda half-assed, but here it goes.

I'll start with the matches:

<b><u>-Opening Match: IC Title - Ric Flair (c) vs. Rene Dupree</u></b>
Random, unannounced match that just gives Flair an excuse to defend the IC title. Dupree is just cannon fodder and it will be a fairly short match, but I'd love to see the chemistry these two have in the ring if given just enough time.

<b><u>-Women's Title: Trish Stratus (c) w/ Ashley vs. Victoria w/ Torrie Wilson and Candice</u></b>
Just a continuation of the feud that's been going on. Victoria steals the win and the title with help from Torrie/Candice....because we all know that heels are incapable of winning cleanly.

<b><u>22-Man Battle Royal - Winner is #1 Contender to IC Title: Carlito, Shelton Benjamin, Kerwin White, Nick Nemeth, Rob Conway, Antonio, Romeo, Johnny Parisi, Matt Striker, Eugene, Danny Basham, Val Venis, Viscera, Tyson Tomko, Big Show, Gene Snitsky, Chris Masters, Tajiri, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, The Hurricane, and Rosey</u></b>

Just really an excuse to get everyone a match for the show. It can be announced the week before. The final five end up being Kerwin, Shelton, Carlito, Conway, and Masters.....it's a 4-on-1 on Shelton, but he manages to make a miracle comeback and get rid of Conway, Kerwin, and Carlito...only for Masters to get the elimination on him and the win. Sorta like the ending to that WW3 battle royal one time where Luger fought back at the end against the nWo. Not sure when the Masters/Flair match will be, not like I wanna see it anyways. :-\

<b><u>Money in the Bank Ladder Match/Loser Leaves Raw: Matt Hardy vs. Edge w/ Lita</u></b>
Should be an awesome match, hopefully of decent length. I can’t see Edge possibly losing here after all of the MITB crap, so I’d have Edge get the win after some form of sick bump.

<b><u>30-Man Iron Man Match: Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels</u></b>
I honestly think this match’s FIRST FALL will come down to the last few seconds…I’m guessing they’d give Angle the win to keep him in the WWE Title hunt. Angle wins 1-0

<b><u>WWE Championship Match: John Cena (c) vs. Eric Bischoff</u></b>
Hopefully they’ll let Bisch at least use SOME of his martial arts skills rather than just let Cena beat the crap out of him the whole time. I forsee Angle KO’ing the ref with a chair and then demolishing Cena…only for Austin, Hogan, and Foley to wait until the last second to make their Raw returns and put a stop to it and take out Angle. Bisch takes 4 finishers in a row (Mandible Claw/Leg Drop/Stunner/F-U) and then another ref comes in and counts the 3. Cena gets the predictable win, but admitedly, seeing all those finishers in a line like that would probably make me mark out.

Now then, as for micellaneous segments that happen throughout the course of the show:

-Just before the Iron Man Match, we see Matt Hardy talking to Theodore Long/Palmer Cannon backstage…Long/Cannon invite Hardy back to SD

-Not sure what HHH will say in his promo, but I just pray that it doesn’t involve the words “WWE Championship” anywhere near each other. I’d much rather see him in another feud before getting thrust right back into the WWE Title scene just when Cena/Angle seems to be heating up.

-As for the surplus of other legends, I’m really not sure. I guess they will be strewn throughout the show in interviews or as cameos in other segments. I doubt there’d be a ceremony, because really, what would be the point? Some of the legends showing up are in the HOF anyways. Maybe a Legends Match will get thrown in? I wouldn’t mind seeing that, especially if they had Vince join in on commentary for it for old-times sake. :lol:

-He hasn’t been announced, but I’d love to see The Rock make a surprise appearance, also it would be great if injured guys Kane and Rob Van Dam show up as well (if they do, I’m pretty sure everyone on the roster will have appeared on this one show).

--------
Anyways, chances are the real thing will look nothing like that, but I can dream.</font>

[Rob]

I could care less. If I was in the States, I'd be watching the UFC then TNA.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>Damn, who'da thought my half-assed booking was the best one in here?</font> :eek:

:shifty:

[loopydate]

The Opening

The opening segment is a video package, highlighting RAW's history on USA (particularly the "Attitude Era" that took place on that network).

Pyro goes off, and JR, King, and Coach hype up the biggest ni--

But they're interrupted by the sound of...bagpipes? The crowd erupts for Roddy Piper, who enters the ring, which has been set up for Piper's Pit.

Piper's Pit

Piper cuts a short promo about tonight being a homecoming. Dozens of legends in the back, but the one they all came to see was the Hot Rod. Tires squeal, and another huge pop for Mick Foley! Foley comes out and says its great to be back in...Dallas, Texas! Shill shill shill book book book joke about "skirts."

"I spit in da face of people who don't wanna be cool!" Booooooooooo. Carlito comes out and gets in Foley's face. "You got a new book out, Mick. You know, Carlito read Scooter. And let Carlito tell you, Mick...it was not cool. And coming out on Carlito's show and shilling it? Das not cool." He then turns on Piper, who has been chuckling at the diatribe. Carlito tells him off for stealing Carlito's thunder and calling the Pit a Cabana ripoff. Carlito goes back to Foley, but Piper hits him upside the head with an apple. Piper puts the boots to Carlito until Chris Masters runs in!

Masters knocks Piper aside, then turns his attention to Foley. Master Lock! Foley struggles, but Masters has it cinched in. Piper comes back to get revenge, but Carlito takes him down. Fade to a commercial as Carlito and Masters stand triumphant.

After the break, JR says that due to the events in the Pit, a tag team match has been signed for later tonight, Roddy Piper and Mick Foley vs. Carlito and Chris Masters!

Backstage Segment

Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch are in their locker room, with Cade psyching Murdoch up for their Tag Title elimination match tonight. There's a knock at the door, and someone comes in. Cade and Murdoch look at whoever it is with a look of disgust on their faces. The camera pans over to reveal...Hillbilly Jim! Insert hillbilly/redneck humor here. Hillbilly leaves and Murdoch turns to Cade. "I always hated that guy."

Bra & Panties Match - Trish & Ashley vs. Victoria, Torrie & Candice

Blah blah blah, the heels get undressed, Trish & Ashley celebrate. Etc. Commercial break.

Tag Team Title Elimination Match - Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (c) vs. The Hurricane & Rosey vs. Val Venis & Viscera vs. The Heart Throbs

Pretty standard stuff here. Cade and Murdoch are the last team standing after beating Hurricane & Rosey.

Backstage Segment

Eugene is walking down a hallway, when he suddenly gasps. The camera pans over to reveal...Koko B. Ware! The crowd doesn't know how to react. Eugene and Koko do the Bird for a couple of laughs, then Eugene is on his way. "WHOA! Greg 'The Hammer' Valentine!" Sure enough, there's the Hammer himself. Eugene talks about Valentine's career accomplishments and whatnot. You know, typical Eugene stuff. Then, some comedy stuff with Jim Duggan. Notice a trend? He walks on a bit more, and...oh, dear God. It's Mae and Moolah. Eugene talks about Moolah holding the Women's Title "Longer than I've been alive!" Mae tries to make out with him. Ha ha ha. Sigh.

Interview Segment

Maria is with Ric Flair (for, what, the eleventh week in a row?). Flair again promises that Triple H will be here tonight and that the time has finally come to deal with Carlito and Chris Masters. He turns to leave, and there's...HARLEY FUCKING RACE! They go into a staredown. Harley then smirks. "Good luck."

Money In The Bank/Loser Leaves RAW/Ladder Match - Matt Hardy vs. Edge

The ladder is set up at ringside, and the briefcase is swinging above the ring. Edge comes to the ring with Lita. Edge eyes the briefcase. "Whoa yeaaaaaaaaaaah." Matt comes to the ring, but doesn't get in right away. He walks around to the other side of the ring and gets the mic from Lilian. He says that he may have nothing to lose, but he's not stupid. He knows why Lita is ringside: to cost him his job again. But he went out and he found out someone to even the score. Thirteen year old girls scream for Jeff. "Yeah, I found myself someone who's no stranger to putting his body on the line." More screams. "Supe--supe--superfly!" The smarks go nuts, and most of the marks follow suit. It's Jimmy Snuka! BAH GAWD SLOBBERKNOCKER! Commercial break.

The match is underway after the break, and the two put on a heck of a show. Since he's trying to entice more viewers back, Vince loosens the leash a bit and lets these two go nuts. All kinds of brutal ladder spots, with some chair and table stuff thrown in for good measure. When it all comes down to it, though, Matt is about to reach for the case, when Lita gets in the ring and tips over the ladder. Snuka goes to confront her, but gets Speared. Edge sets up the ladder and, while Lita holds Matt's ankle, grabs the briefcase. Matt Hardy has lost his job...again! Edge is still Mister Money In The Bank. Commercial break.

Backstage Segment

Matt Hardy is dejected. He's smashing up everything in his path. Finally, he's calmed down by...Teddy Long? "Listen, playa, you had a lot of bad luck lately, but things are lookin' up. You lost yo job with RAW, true, but there's always a place for you on Friday Night SmackDown. Ya feel me?"

SmackDown Match - Batista/The Undertaker/Chris Benoit/Eddie Guerrero vs. JBL/Randy Orton/Orlando Jordan/Christian

Just a hunch, but I bet Teddy will announce something along these lines on FNS this week. The match is basically one big clusterfuck. All the current feuds get played out to hype No Mercy, and in the end everybody gets disqualified. After the match, the heels (with help from "Cowby" Bob Orton) take advantage, and all that's left in the ring is the heels vs. Undertaker. Taker is taking a beating until the ramp erupts with pyro. Kane stalks to the ring, and the heels scatter. Kane and UT stare each other down. "This is spooky." No shit, JR.

Backstage Segment

Jimmy Hart is talking to someone on the phone when he's approached by...the Con Man! Conway talks himself up, saying that the Mouth of the South has nothing on the Con Man. "I mean, just look at me!" I'm lookin' atcha, daddy, etc. etc. Basically, Conway tells Hart that he can beat anybody that Hart can come up with. And he'll be waiting in the ring. Commercial break.

Rob Conway's Open Challenge

Conway is in the ring, when Jimmy Hart comes out. He talks for a bit about tonight being Homecoming and tonight, daddy, he's gonna take on one of the biggest stars in the world. "Real American" hits, and the crowd goes ape-poopy. Conway tries to get out of it, but he doesn't stand a chance against Hulk Hogan! Conway tries to ambush him before the bell, but Hogan hulks up, hits the boot, and the legdrop. Easy win for the Hulkster. BAH GAWD IT'S A HOMECOMING! Indeed.

30-Minute Iron Man Match - Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

What more can be said about these two guys? They're going to put on a phenomenal match. Angle wins it to keep his contender momentum alive. Let's say, oh, 3-2 with the bell sounding as HBK pins Angle after a superkick, but before the ref's hand hits a third time. Commercial break (to go with the two that happen during the match).

More legends!

Panning the crowd, the camera spots Superstar Billy Graham, Chief Jay Strongbow, and Nikolai Volkoff. Yep. That's all they get. Sorry, fellas, but there's still an Austin and HHH segment to come. :roll:

Mick Foley & Roddy Piper vs. Carlito & Chris Masters

Pretty standard stuff, with the heels cutting off the ring from Foley and Piper. Finally, Foley goes to make a tag, but Piper...steps down! Piper walks out on his partner, yelling something about Foley's joke from earlier. BAH GAWD BETRAYAL! Commercial break.

When we come back, Carlito and Masters have taken firm control of the match, double-teaming the hell out of Mick. Mick manages to clear out Carlito, but winds up in the Masterlock again! "IF YA SMEEEEEEEEEEEELL!" The crowd just goes nuts. It's the Rock & Sock Connection! ROCK WASN'T EVEN SUPPOSED TA BE HERE, KING! Rock enters the ring and lays out Masters, freeing Foley. Rock goes to the apron and gets the hot tag. Punch punch spit punch. Rock Bottom on Masters! Rock Bottom on Carlito! People's Elbow! One! Two! Three! BAH GAWD HOM-- Yeah, we get it.

Rock & Sock celebrate, but are suddenly blindsided by Carlito and Masters, each wielding chairs. They pound the living crap out of Rocky and Mick until Motorhead hits the speakers and, for the first time since...well, since his last flip-flop face turn, the crowd goes nuts for Triple H! He and Flair come to the ring, wielding sledgehammers. Carlito and Masters duck and cover, and HHH and Flair help Rock and Mick to their feet. BAH GAWD! FOUR OF THE GREATEST--NO! DAMMIT, WHY? Triple H and Flair suddenly turn on Rock & Sock, obliterating them with the sledgehammers. Carlito and Masters re-enter the ring, and the foursome continue the beating.

Flair grabs a microphone. "WOOOOOOO!" He talks about being the dirtiest player in the game and, once again, everybody fell for it. Carlito wasn't kidding when he said there was a youth movement going on. Carlito and Masters are the future of this business, and he and Hunter wanted to get in on the ground floor. They did this once before, and molded two World Champions out of two up-and-comers. This time around, the sky's the limit.

Hunter grabs the mic and...well, we know what he's going to talk about. Commercial.

WWE Title Match - John Cena (c) vs. Eric Bischoff

Cena gets in a bunch of early offense until a remarkably convenient ref bump. Cena continues to pound on Bischoff until...Knockout Boot by Tyson Tomko! Tomko beats Cena up for a bit, then drags Bischoff on top of him. The referee rolls over to make the count. One! Two! BAH GAWD CENA KICKS OUT! Cena gets in some more offense. Tomko again tries to get involved, but gets an F-U for his trouble. Cena again tries to get the win, but the referee is dragged out of the ring by Snitsky! Snitsky hits the big kick on Cena, and we re-do the earlier bit, but this time..."WEEEEEEEELL!" Big Show runs out and chokeslams Snitsky! The ref has come to once again, and sees Show in the ring. He forces him out, which distracts Cena (and the referee). Bischoff grabs a steel chair. He swings it at Cena, and nails him right between the eyes, just as the referee turns around! He calls for the bell, disqualifying Bischoff.

Bischoff looks appalled, but then gets a sick look in his eye. By this point, Tomko and Snitsky have sufficiently double-teamed Big Show, giving Bischoff the opportunity to repeatedly blast Cena with the chair. Over and over again. And he's a bloody mess! Bischoff makes a motion to the locker room.

IT'S EDGE! IT'S EDGE! He comes running down to the ring and hands Bischoff the Money In The Bank briefcase. Cena staggers to his feet just as Bischoff signals the timekeeper to ring the bell. Cena turns right into...A SPEAR! NO, DAMMIT! ONE! TWO! THREE! NEW CHAMPION! MAY GOD SAVE US ALL!

Edge and Bischoff celebrate with the belt, and the crowd is absolutely hating this. Suddenly...GLASS SHATTERS! STONE COLD! STONE COLD! BAH GAWD! IT'S STONE COLD! MAH LIFE IS COMPLETE! AH CAN DIE HAPPY NOW!

Austin hits the ring. Doles out a couple of Stunners. Drinks beer. Etc. BAH GAWD, IT'S A NEW ERA! Fade to black.

Unfortunately, there are a bunch of guys that I just couldn't fit into the show (even if it is three hours long). So, my virtual apologies to Danny Basham, Johnny Parisi, Kerwin White, Matt Striker, Rene Dupree, Rob Van Dam (get healthy NOW!), Shelton Benjamin (the one I feel really bad about), and Tajiri. Heck, even Todd Grisham got snubbed!

===============

Okay, so that's my show. I know it's probably a bitch to read, but I have a lot of time on my hands. Thoughts would be appreciated.

[Destor]

You'd get my show of the year vote.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>Holy fuck.....awesome booking there Loopy :eek:

If that happened, I'd wipe the slate of recent bad WWE booking clean</font>

[The Naitch]

except if I was Rock I wouldn't want to come back just to job it up to Big Nose and Viagra Classic

[loopydate]

Well, if I was planning long-term, I'd set up Foley/Rock vs. Carlito/Masters for Taboo Tuesday in a choose-the-gimmick match.

In the weeks leading up to Tuesday, Rock manages to get in his licks. The loss at Homecoming gives him an actual story to come back to, instead of "Hey, I'm The Rock, who can I feud with this time?"

Doom hits on October 21, Taboo Tuesday is November 1. He gets three weeks (10/3, 10/10, 10/17) to hype the movie and the match, then two weeks to devote to the match.

[The Naitch]

interesting

[The Naitch]

Or Rock can just come back and feud with Carlito

[Jaton]

To what point and purpose?

[The Naitch]

to put over Carlito, at the same time hyping DOOM

or to probably show the world that he tattoed his whole body

[CYCLOPTERSAURUS]

That'd be great Loopy. Shame WWE is too stupid to do anything half as good. My only question is how they'd promote an Angle / Edge match on PPV. I guess they could just go ahead with Angle / Cena, and then have Edge defend against...? The new Evolution would be interesting, but I'm still in denial about Masters' push.

[Tornado]

IT'S EDGE! IT'S EDGE! He comes running down to the ring and hands Bischoff the Money In The Bank briefcase. Cena staggers to his feet just as Bischoff signals the timekeeper to ring the bell. Cena turns right into...A SPEAR! NO, DAMMIT! ONE! TWO! THREE! NEW CHAMPION! MAY GOD SAVE US ALL!




Even though I dislike Edge, I like this.

[loopydate]

That'd be great Loopy. Shame WWE is too stupid to do anything half as good. My only question is how they'd promote an Angle / Edge match on PPV. I guess they could just go ahead with Angle / Cena, and then have Edge defend against...? The new Evolution would be interesting, but I'm still in denial about Masters' push.

That's a good question, and it's something I considered changing. But I think the fans hate Edge so much (especially if the announcers put over the fact that he cost Matt Hardy his job again) that Angle might get over as the default face for the feud.

Or, if need be, let there be some controversy over the finish of the Iron Man Match (possibly the pinfall-at-the-buzzer scenario I wrote out) and have the Taboo Tuesday title match be like the IC match last year. Give the fans the choice between Angle, Cena, Michaels, Show, and HHH (for example) with the agreement that no matter what happens, Angle gets the shot at Survivor Series.

The fans will pick Cena, naturally, and I might even have him go over Edge. Sure, it's only a four-week reign, but a month is long enough to put Edge legitimately in the main event as something other than "the guy with the briefcase," if booked properly.

[Jaton]

to put over Carlito, at the same time hyping DOOM

or to probably show the world that he tattoed his whole body


Carlito doesn't really need it. I doubt Doom will need it. His tattoo looks like shit.