The Calgary Sun urges us to pay $35 to see God

[Xero]

World Wrestling Entertainment has announced the biggest celebrity guest appearance in the history of sports, the history of entertainment and, probably, the history of the world.

At the Backlash pay-per-view April 30, God will make his pro-wrestling debut.

Yes, WWE is advertising the actual God -- of Old and New Testament fame -- will be taking part in a grappling match and, for just $35, you can witness a moment previously thought to be reserved for sometime around the Second Coming.

Here's the back story: A few weeks ago at Wrestlemania, Shawn Michaels defeated Vince McMahon in a violent one-on-one match. McMahon later accused Michaels of having help to win the match, in the form of divine intervention. Therefore, McMahon declared, to even the score, he would team with his son, Shane, and take on Michaels and God in a tag team match at the next pay-per-view.

Now here's the real story. WWE is rapidly running out of edgy angles to push the envelope and get some watercooler talk going. Since the anti-Arab storylines were nixed by the networks and fans no longer react to the exploitation of Eddie Guerrero's death, the company was on the lookout for the latest buzz topic to latch onto.

Seeing dollar signs in the controversy spawned by The Da Vinci Code and The Passion of the Christ, McMahon decided Christian sensitivities were ripe for the picking.

The storyline was plotted and the wheels were set in motion, with Michaels -- a devout Christian who often turns down WWE scripts because they go against his beliefs -- at the helm.

How they actually execute the match, though, is still anybody's guess.

For one thing, the pay-per-view takes place on a Sunday which, last I checked, God doesn't work.

Remarkably, Christian groups haven't come out in opposition to the storyline, although that's not necessarily an indication they see it as fun family entertainment.

It likely either means WWE is so far under the public radar that no one knows or cares what happens on their TV shows, or WWE has crossed the line of decency so many times the mainstream is completely desensitized to any cheap publicity stunt.

But while the storyline isn't stirring controversy, it is getting a ton of press for the company and developing a lot of curiosity.

McMahon vs. God. April 30 on pay-per-view. Top that, Don King.

http://calsun.canoe.ca/Sports/OtherSports/2006/04/15/1535417-sun.html

So I guess it's finally being picked up by the media...

[Kane Knight]

I guess that confirms Bret Hart will be showing. :shifty:

[Flair Wooo]

Bret Hart is god after all

[Kane Knight]

Plus, it's the Calgary Sun. ;)

[Pepsi Man]

and fans no longer react to the exploitation of Eddie Guerrero's death
They don't?

[Batsu]

Since the anti-Arab storylines were nixed by the networks


ALEEEIIIIILLLLLLLLY YA LEIIIIILLLLLLLY YAAAAA LEEEEEEEEIEEEEIL YAYAYE...

Curse UPN.

[Kane Knight]

For one thing, the pay-per-view takes place on a Sunday which, last I checked, God doesn't work.

[parkmania]

For one thing, the pay-per-view takes place on a Sunday which, last I checked, God doesn't work.



Pure gold.

[UmbrellaCorporation]

Yeah, really.

If he doesn't work on Sunday, he'll pull an Austin and it'll turn into a handicap match.

[NeanderCarl]

I sense a God heel turn.

Let's be honest, God has been a face for over 2000 years now and, quite frankly, the gimmick is getting a bit stale.

[Kane Knight]

I sense a God heel turn.

Let's be honest, God has been a face for over 2000 years now and, quite frankly, the gimmick is getting a bit stale.

He was heel for almost 4000 years before that, though.

[Pepsi Man]

I don't know. Maybe they should make him more of a tweener. Still do some of the shit that gets him cheered now, but also use heel tactics, like low blows and chair shots, and have him target some of the babies, too.

[McLegend]

woah targeting babies? that's gimmick infringement there.

[Pepsi Man]

woah targeting babies? that's gimmick infringement there.
Yeah, but as long as he only does it for WWE, Vince will probably allow it. He just couldn't use it if he left the WWE for some other promotion.

[McLegend]

I'm sure God would have some great lawyers though so he could take Vince to court if he truely wanted to.

[Kane Knight]

I'm sure God would have some great lawyers though so he could take Vince to court if he truely wanted to.

Where's he gonna find a lawyer where HE lives?

[McLegend]

Well I'm sure there has been at least a few very good moral lawayers throughout the course of history. So I'm sure he can find them. I have faith in him.

[NeanderCarl]

He should get a hold of Johnny Cochrane. If anybody can beat WWE's legal team, it's Johnny "O.J. didn't do it" Cochrane.

[NeanderCarl]

He was heel for almost 4000 years before that, though.

Nearly as long as Triple H then?

[Kane Knight]

Yeah, but at least He didn't hold the title that long.

[The Heat]

:lol:

"God doesn't work Sundays". Someone better tell McMahon. His PPV will be ruined!

[NeanderCarl]

Yeah, but at least He didn't hold the title that long.

No, but I heard he rallied long and hard to get the NWA board to put the title on Jesus. (Who incidentally returned to the business a couple of years ago alongisde Carlito). Ironically, it was Vince Sr. who nixed that idea. So this is a feud that goes way back.

Bloody nepotism in wrestling, it never ends does it?

[Pepsi Man]

No, but I heard he rallied long and hard to get the NWA board to put the title on Jesus. (Who incidentally returned to the business a couple of years ago alongisde Carlito). Ironically, it was Vince Sr. who nixed that idea. So this is a feud that goes way back.

Bloody nepotism in wrestling, it never ends does it?
I think Flair in his prime made a better champion than Jesus would've, though, so it was a good choice.

[NeanderCarl]

I think Flair in his prime made a better champion than Jesus would've, though, so it was a good choice.

A fair point, but God (naturally) didn't see it that way. Talk about a power trip!

[.44 Magdalene]

Lmao@this thread.

[Pepsi Man]

A fair point, but God (naturally) didn't see it that way. Talk about a power trip!
Damn, what a backstage political bastard God was then. Hell, he probably doesn't want to work Tuesdays anymore either.

[Dorkchop]

He's a dick backstage. He demands his own dressing room and won't change with the other guys. Plus, I heard he shit in someone's bag.

[94 SVT Cobra]

What the hell.......Did i just get laid?

[Pinnacle Charisma]

He was heel for almost 4000 years before that, though.

Was he though? I mean during that time he created the world and destroyed the dinosaurs. Dosnt sound like heel work to me.

[Blitz]

If Shane has any sense, he'll stay away from the PPV.

Y'know, being the first born son and all...

[Corkscrewed]

For one thing, the pay-per-view takes place on a Sunday which, last I checked, God doesn't work.
LOL. Yeah, that's true, even though it didn't occur to me until just now. :lol:

[tucsonspeed6]

destroyed the dinosaurs.

You mean the great "screwjob" of 65 Million BC?

Man, can you believe whenever the guy makes an appearance in the Everglades the stupid crocs STILL boo the guy out of the building? They'll never let it go.

[Azriel]

Vince will probably actually use that at the PPV that God doesn't work on Sundays, so instead he announces it'll be a handicapped match then Shawn will bring in the mystery partner.

Oh, and if God wasn't a heel, how do you explain the whole Flood thing?

[Blitz]

You mean the great "screwjob" of 65 Million BC?

Man, can you believe whenever the guy makes an appearance in the Everglades the stupid crocs STILL boo the guy out of the building? They'll never let it go.
"You Screwed Rex! You Screwed Rex!"

[Kane Knight]

A fair point, but God (naturally) didn't see it that way. Talk about a power trip!

And strangely, still a one-man power trip.

[Favre4Ever]

If the fire on tonights RAW was any indication, the match could get way, WAY ridiculous.

[ddpBANG]

If the fire on tonights RAW was any indication, the match could get way, WAY ridiculous.
It's already way Way ridiculous and they haven't even had the match yet.

[The One]

I have to admit, if i got a free half-eighth of weed with Backlash, I would be interested in the match.

[owenbrown]

Damn, what a backstage political bastard God was then. Hell, he probably doesn't want to work Tuesdays anymore either.

I thought that was the reason JBL was WWE Champion for so long, according to Paul Heyman... :shifty:

[Kane Knight]

It's already way Way ridiculous and they haven't even had the match yet.

Would people really prefer a serious "God" angle?

[Xero]

Would people really prefer a serious "God" angle?
Well, since there would probably wind up being a real sacrifice...

[Kane Knight]

Hmmm...Where are they gonna find a virgin?

[Xero]

It's wrestling, it doesn't ALL have to be technical.

By WWE's logic, Stephanie's a virgin.

Although it wouldn't be a real, REAL sacrifice, it'd still work for God's push.

[freerock1.com]

and if God wasn't a heel, how do you explain the whole Flood thing?
Anytime He had moments that appeared heel/tweener, it was always when someone had rebelled. I guess you could put it that He'd been chair shot to the back.

[Kane Knight]

Anytime He had moments that appeared heel/tweener, it was always when someone had rebelled. I guess you could put it that He'd been chair shot to the back.

God: your world has become corrupt. I'm going to inject a POISON INTO IT...

Noah: My Lord, I have followed you faithfully for all my years. Will I suffer along with these Godless heathens?

God: No, your contract is iron clad. You will build an arc and take your family to safety. After forty days of flooding, the waters shall subside and you shall set forth to create a new world...And I shall guide this New World Order...Note to Legal, trademark that.

Tune in Next Week to see how God saves Jesus on the Cross via a run-in with an "equaliser," and turns heel after aligning with the Whore or Babylon and Judas...