I've figured it out.

[Kane Knight]

So yeah, I was thinking about wrestling the other night for no apparent reason other than the fact that I was vomiting and compared the taste in my mouth with that of WWE...:shifty:

No, but really. I've figured it out.

There was a time when I could watch a wrestling match, root for my favorite, and actually hope he'd win. Even when it was Foley v Triple H, I could bring myself to hold out some hope that Trips might actually lay down.

A few years later, it's become painfully obvious that this doesn't really happen, and so it becomes more and more ridiculous to suspend disbelief.

I could blame the politics, but that would be disingenuous. Even when I was still intent, there was a lot fo politicking. I could blame the roster, bu that's not the issue either. If WWF could make me dig a title match that featured a random jobber guy, then it shouldn't matter that they don't have The Rock, Austin, Undertaker (As a full timer), Mankind, etc. on the roster anymore. And the booking?

Well, for the most part, the booking isn't even a problem. I can buy most of the characters, but there's no drama anymore. There's no point in suspending disbelief, because it's all laid out. I'd like to say I could at least turn to TNA, but they seem to book by the same politics: They're just angrier at WWE when they do it.

So what do you think wrestling can do to bring back some of the actual drama? There's almost no real conflict anymore.

[Volare]

Keep a storyline going for more than 2 months. Or IF you wanna keep it going don't throw in retarded gimmicks (like the HBK with GOD thing) and don't repeat the same match 2 or 3 times (HBK vs Spirit Squad) (Umaga vs No Namer for a squash) Especially Umaga. He has a main event match coming up and what is he doing, beating down jobbers and has faced no real talent (exception of Jeff Hardy) or IF he is confronted it's a quick brawl and no more is heard.

If the WWE could put some thought about how to play out a storyline...I bet they would draw more to it.

[TerranRich]

I think we've just been disillusioned by wrestling to the point where nothing is exciting, save for a few rare moments of brilliance, quickly killed off by sheer stupidity on the part of the creative team.

[Stickman]

I think everything is overbooked and rushed. Let the wrestlers develop their characters.

[KingofOldSchool]

I think they've done a good job of building up Umaga.

Sometimes it's better for them to goto the old school route of having their stars destroy jobbers rather than them destroying other superstars.

I'd prefer Umaga destroying a modern day Pez Whatley than to destroy someone like Jeff Hardy.

[Stickman]

You seriously like Umaga? A guy who destroys people but has zero chance of holding a belt, or really doing anything other than being a retarded looking fat guy with a grill and who screams jibberish, does nothing for me. At least Kamala did something unique and pinned guys for a 5 count and pinned them on their front.

[Kane Knight]

Shoulda known...

[Volare]

What, the reference between Umaga and Kamala??


Wait I see it now... they both have at least 2 "a's" in their name right!!! :shifty:

[The One]

Umaga is one of the brightest shining lights of how WWE is a fucking waste of time.

[Volare]

True...also, who are they gonna push now that Orton and Edge are busy with the DX storyline? Sure as fuck not Masters with the bullshit they're putting him through. Maybe Carlito but same point feuding with Masters. Who else they got that's a somewhat legit heel?

[Londoner]

I agree there's just no drama anymore and that's why i've stopped watching the shows whenever they're on. There's just no reason to watch, it's hard to keep shows interesting when you have a split roster, im certain of that, but they could atleast try. The first part of Raw last night just reminded me of why i hate WWE atm, and made me not bother to watch for the rest of it.

[Stickman]

I think it was probably the most boring Raw in a few years.

[KingofOldSchool]

You seriously like Umaga? A guy who destroys people but has zero chance of holding a belt, or really doing anything other than being a retarded looking fat guy with a grill and who screams jibberish, does nothing for me. At least Kamala did something unique and pinned guys for a 5 count and pinned them on their front.

Where did it say that I liked him?

[M-A-G]

Suspension of disbelief is pretty much the only way to go. If you can look at it as just a fan and not worry about what the political motivations behind something or someone not getting a push they 'deserve' it can be quite exciting. That said, the WWE creative needs to write stuff that people will be willing to buy into and unfortunately, KK, I can't really think of anything.

[M-A-G]

And anyone who doesn't think Umaga would be the given the belt, two words: Brock...Lesnar.

[TerranRich]

Are you seriously comparing Brock Lesnar to Umaga? LMAO

[M-A-G]

No. Just saying how the WWE has the put the title on people who haven't done anything to justify it but will do it anyway because it's what they want no matter what before.

[St. Jimmy]

I like Umaga :'(. He gets to beat up on Cena and eat jobbers. Where's the bad in that?

[TerranRich]

Yeah but at least Brock Lesnar had talent and was great to watch. I mean, Umaga isn't the worst thing in wrestling today, but he's not exactly ratings.

[Mr. Nerfect]

I don't really like Umaga, and normally I'd be against him getting the belt, but I really hope he wins at New Year's Revolution. The longer John Cena, Bobby Lashley and Batista hold their respective World Titles, the more boring the WWE becomes.

Better yet, change the WWE Title around next week. They've got a 30-Man Battle Royal, with the winner getting a WWE Title shot on that show. Why not have someone win the Battle Royal, then win the WWE Title with help from Johnny Nitro, Joey Mercury and Kevin Federline? That would be pretty exciting.

The babyfaces constantly winning matches ruins the suspension of belief. Triple H won two matches on RAW for crying out loud. Part of me thinks he did it just to compete with John Cena. Hell, he probably did.

Wrestling shows used to be "can't miss". Now you're damn sure you can miss them. Here's the rumoured card for New Year's Revolution, complete with how I would book it to try and make it most interesting:

John Cena vs. Umaga for the WWE Championship

I'd add a third man, possibly Finlay or King Booker from SmackDown!, who wins the WWE Championship next week on RAW. Assuming it is just Cena and Umaga, though, I'd definately have Umaga win. Maybe have him reveal he's not an island savage, and join up with Eric Bischoff? Could be interesting.

Rated-RKO vs. D-Generation X for the World Tag Team Championship

Have Rated-RKO retain the Titles here. Maybe have Eric Bischoff give them a hand. Jamal, Edge, Randy Orton, Kenny & Eric Bischoff as some kind of heel stable? Could be interesting.

Kenny vs. Ric Flair

Ken Doane picks up the clean win here. There is no reason for Ric Flair to go over. This allows Ken Doane to officially join Rated-RKO. Put him over either with the RKO, or Ric Flair's own Figure Four. I'd lean more towards the latter, as it has a certain impact.

Carlito vs. Chris Masters

This match actually has me interested. Both guys have a major upside to them, and the winner here could get a main event push. I'd have Chris Masters pick up the win when Torrie Wilson betrays Carlito, and Masters secures The Masterlock on the former Intercontinental and United States Champion.

Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

Yeah, I'd rather see something else, too, but this is probably going to happen. Have Johnny Nitro pick up the win, and his third Intercontinental Championship, with some kind of Joey Mercury assist. Mercury has nothing better to do, so have him make the jump to RAW, and help out the mid-card.

Cryme Tyme vs. The World's Greatest Tag Team

As much as I hate to say it, Cryme Tyme should probably go over. Have them pin Charlie Haas, and have Shelton slap Haas after the match. Haas snaps and takes out Shelton Benjamin with a few exploder suplexes, and puts him in the Haas of Pain.

Mickie James vs. Victoria for the WWE Women's Championship

Have Victoria win the match, albeit via disqualification, when Beth Phoenix returns and attacks Victoria mid-match. It sets up another feud, and keeps Vicky looking strong.

Jerry Lawler vs. Eugene

Jerry Lawler has competed at every New Year's Revolution PPV, why not this one? Have Eugene pick up the clean win with the DDT, and then have someone less annoying come out for colour commentary. Eugene can join up with Eric Bischoff's new heel stable, and reveal that he was just pretending to be retarded for his Uncle Eric, because "Controversy Creates Cash".

[addy2hotty]

Jamal,


I'm hoping this is a genuine error, as your stuff is normally good. If it's not, then...I think I was just sick in my mouth a little bit.

[Mr. Nerfect]

I'm hoping this is a genuine error, as your stuff is normally good. If it's not, then...I think I was just sick in my mouth a little bit.

Jamal > Umaga, in my opinion.

[The One]

I've figured it out...

Vince McMahon is making his entire product suck as to make John Cena not suck by comparison! Genius!

[Londoner]

Sorry but you can't compare Umaga and Brock lesnar, atleast Lesnar was entertaining to watch and had a decent finisher...i just don't know how anyone could compare the two.

[The One]

Brock Lesnar = Defeated a who's who list of stars

Umaga = Defeated guys who arn't even well known on the indie scene

Brock Lesnar = Big muscle man

Umaga = Big fat man

Brock Lesnar = Legit history in NCAA to lean on as a gimmick

Umaga = Legit history in...uh...pie eating contests?

Brock Lesnar = Incredible finisher that was amazing to watch

Umaga = Incredibly dumb finisher that I am amazed I am forced to watch

Brock Lesnar = Way over pushed

Umaga = The fact that he has a push is over pushed

See, I compared Brock Lesnar and Umaga. It wasn't pretty but I did it.

[McLegend]

I think they've done a good job of building up Umaga.

Sometimes it's better for them to goto the old school route of having their stars destroy jobbers rather than them destroying other superstars.

I'd prefer Umaga destroying a modern day Pez Whatley than to destroy someone like Jeff Hardy.
Exactly

And I'm so glad someone argees with me about this.

[FourFifty]

I can tell you what wrestling needs in one word.


*inhales deeply*

Goldusssssst!
*chomp!*

[Mr. Nerfect]

Brock Lesnar = Defeated a who's who list of stars

Umaga = Defeated guys who arn't even well known on the indie scene

Brock Lesnar = Big muscle man

Umaga = Big fat man

Brock Lesnar = Legit history in NCAA to lean on as a gimmick

Umaga = Legit history in...uh...pie eating contests?

Brock Lesnar = Incredible finisher that was amazing to watch

Umaga = Incredibly dumb finisher that I am amazed I am forced to watch

Brock Lesnar = Way over pushed

Umaga = The fact that he has a push is over pushed

See, I compared Brock Lesnar and Umaga. It wasn't pretty but I did it.

Well, to be fair to Umaga, he did work in Japan for a while. The guy does have talent, and can move pretty well for a guy his size. From a character stand-point, though, you are absolutely right.

[Mr. Nerfect]

I'd still take him winning the WWE Championship, smashing it into a million pieces in a fit of rage, and bringing back a more traditional belt over John Cena defending, though.

[tucsonspeed6]

Brock Lesnar = Incredible finisher that was amazing to watch

Umaga = Incredibly dumb finisher that I am amazed I am forced to watch



Which finisher of Umaga's are you refering to?

The butt slam: Lame

The thumb in the neck: Lame, but less so.

Tossing a guy in the air, then catching him on his way down and turning it into a samoan drop: Not Lame.

[RVDmark]

I can tell you what wrestling needs in one word.


*inhales deeply*

Goldusssssst!
*chomp!*


As much as like Goldust, even if they brought him back he wouldn't be used properly so, meh.

[RVDmark]

Don't get me wrong though, I would like to see him back.

[Kane Knight]

Suspension of disbelief is pretty much the only way to go. If you can look at it as just a fan and not worry about what the political motivations behind something or someone not getting a push they 'deserve' it can be quite exciting. That said, the WWE creative needs to write stuff that people will be willing to buy into and unfortunately, KK, I can't really think of anything.

That's the thing. I can't even MAKE myself buy in anymore, because there's no reason to. You don't need to know politics to know DX is gonna own, Cena won't go down until Wiggermania no longer runs wild in this country, everyone's scared of Undertaker (Even if they've been lit on fire, blown up, or killed by a stingray) and that no matter how little a reaction someone gets, they're sill put over as a major face/heel if that's what VKM (That's right, Voodoo Kin Mafia) wants. Honestly, I don't even know why anyone would try, either.

[Stickman]

The dreaded thumb poke to the neck is the worst finisher in pro wrestling. Worse than Hogan's leg drop.

[TerranRich]

What about Khali's judo CHOP!

[tucsonspeed6]

The dreaded thumb poke to the neck is the worst finisher in pro wrestling. Worse than Hogan's leg drop.

Worse than sticking your fingers in somebody's mouth?

[The One]

WAY WORSE.

Frankly, I take Finger Poke of Doom over Thumb to the Neck.

[M-A-G]

Yeah but at least Brock Lesnar had talent and was great to watch. I mean, Umaga isn't the worst thing in wrestling today, but he's not exactly ratings.

Neither was Brock when he started out. Up until the time he won the title the first time, he had nothing resembling a main event level wrestling match as he was just all squash matches and power moves. But they still put the belt on him because they wanted him to be The Next Big Thing. It wasn't something EARNED mind you, it was name they gave him right from the start. That's called a self-fulfilling prophecy. It was only after he started mixing it up with Angle that he began looking like he was worth a damn, which he didn't end up becoming but whatever.

[M-A-G]

Brock Lesnar = Defeated a who's who list of stars

Umaga = Defeated guys who arn't even well known on the indie scene

Brock Lesnar = Big muscle man

Umaga = Big fat man

Brock Lesnar = Legit history in NCAA to lean on as a gimmick

Umaga = Legit history in...uh...pie eating contests?

Brock Lesnar = Incredible finisher that was amazing to watch

Umaga = Incredibly dumb finisher that I am amazed I am forced to watch

Brock Lesnar = Way over pushed

Umaga = The fact that he has a push is over pushed

See, I compared Brock Lesnar and Umaga. It wasn't pretty but I did it.

LMAO!!!