ECW Battle Royal

[D Mac]

* Elijah Burke
* CM Punk
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Matt Striker
* Sylvester Terkay
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Rob Van Dam
* Tazz
* Big Show


The winner will meet Rory McAllister and William Regal in a Triple Threat match and you will vote the winner!

When you eliminate someone, explain how they were eliminated and by whom.

Only 1 elimination per post.

Update the list also. Only 1 wrestler per person for 12 hours. OR if there hasn't been any eliminations in a couple of hours or so you can go again.

PS: NO deaths in this one. :mad:

[D Mac]

Matt Striker tries to teach Khali how to talk but Khali is so stupid Striker leaves the ring in disgust.

* Elijah Burke
* CM Punk
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Sylvester Terkay
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Rob Van Dam
* Tazz
* Big Show

[Skippord]

Sylvester Terkay causes everyone in the ring to fall asleep. Thinking he killed everyone and will be arrested he jumps over the top and out

* Elijah Burke
* CM Punk
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Rob Van Dam
* Tazz
* Big Show

[The Naitch]

*Someone enters thew ring and grabs the mic*

Over the past 5 years, i've pretty much lost all connection with happiness. It used to be that there were little things that perked me up and made me in a good mood. Things like Christmas trees. I put a new Chirstmas tree up in my apartment. I used to get so happy inside by looking at them. Now all i can think about is how long it will take me to tear it down after Christmas.

Long drives while smoking the stickiest of the icky made me happy all the time. Now i just want to stay home and sit on my couch.

Jerking off has become more like a job then it has a pleasurable experience. Before i talk myself into spanking it, I usually talk myself out of it by thinking about all the work i do for a split second of happiness.

I've thought about getting a dog, but i dont wanna have to walk it all the time . I also dont want to clean up poop. Smelling dog poop sends me into a Hulk like rage. Its weird. I hate dog poop. Probably ate some when i was a kid or something.

I dont want to spend time with my family on the holidays. I feel as if my time could be better spent and by better spent i mean, sitting on the couch and being high.

I dont want a girlfriend. 2 years ago when i thought about having a girlfriend, I had a very optimistic approach. I was pretty excited about the thought and really enjoyed the dating aspect. Now, I dont want anything to do with a girlfriend. I honestly, at this moment, couldnt talk myself into wanting to have sex. I have no sex drive and even if a fairly decent girl is wanting to reverse cowgirl my cock , i'd probably find a reason to talk myself out of it.

This place used to make me happy. Actually still does, but its also made me pretty self absorbed. I dont really care about other topics on the board. I dont read 70% of the topics here and honestly, when i see people talking about " That thread " or " That person said this ". I could care less. Unless anything has anything to do with my posting personality on this board, i dont pay attention. The only thing thats made me happy here, is by verbally assaulting anyone i can. I used to do this to make people laugh and be accepted by the popular folk, but now i just do it cause i dont really want to be friends with anyone here. I do it for that 10% chance that i might actually laugh my ass off to myself. I could care less what anyone thinks about me. Or if i hurt someones feelings. I'm trying to make me happy. And lately the only way i've been able to do that, is by coming here and calling people names and coming up with a zinger or two. I probably could have been friends with alot of you and do the whole " talk on MSN and AIM about really cools stuff pertaining to TPWW and calling those people by there real names like Michael Stima " thing, but thats so boring. That doesnt make me happy. These internet forums are set up to be a friends area where everyone chats and discusses opinions, but i think thats bull shit. I can do that in real life with no problem. Thats the stuff i dont want to do. I used to enjoy myself alot more when i could come on here and insult someone and not face any repercussions. Now i think about that and look back on some of my past posts. I'm proud of nothing. Not that i should be, but i dont even laugh at some of the insane shit i've said. Some things i've said have been soley to get attention. Cause i cant tolerate getting attention the right way ( being friends and junk ). That is slow and irratating. I suck basically.

I have a shitty job i dont like, 2 addictions, a dream and no major responsibility. All of this works together to totally fuck my life every year. I dont have enough balls to quit my shitty job because my dream is a financial risk. Even if i did pull the trigger on the dream, i have 2 addictions that will basically do me in. I sleep all week long sometimes. Literally waking up for 4-5 hours and going back to sleep for 9-12 hours over and over again. I have no motivation. Even when i dont want to sleep, I still go to sleep.

I'm about to be 25 years old and i've accomplished nothing. I dont even have anything to fall back on or strive towards. And if i did, in the mood i've been in for the past 2 years, I'd find away to fuck that up big time.

I've lost the game of life so far and it sucks really bad, by i have no motivation to change things right now.

[D Mac]

And then RP gets the shit beat out of him.

[What Would Kevin Do?]

The Sandman, drunk, tries to light a smoke, but in the process, sets the ring on fire. Everyone is horribly burned, but no one dies. RVD however, paranoid that the stash he has hidden on him is going to go up in smoke, leaps out of the ring, eliminating himself, but avoiding third degree burns.

Elijah Burke
* CM Punk
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Sylvester Terkay
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Tazz
* Big Show

[Crimson]

Little Bastard finally lands thru the roof into the arena and onto the SpanishAnnounceTable, breaking it in half. Tazz then seez him and love at first site ,he's found another midget ,jumps over the top rope and proceeds to hump him on the ground.

*Elijah Burke
* CM Punk
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Sylvester Terkay
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[Blitz]

Blitz feels like pissing off the IWC, so he eliminates Punk.

* Elijah Burke
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Sylvester Terkay
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[The Naitch]

* Elijah Burke
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* The Great Khali
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[D Mac]

So how is Terkay eliminated?

[What Would Kevin Do?]

Pretty sure he was eliminated earlier and Naitch was just updating shit.

[Impact!]

The Great Khali goes to eliminate Tommy Dreamer with a clothsline, but as he is a giant botching machine he botches it and eliminates himself somehow

* Elijah Burke
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Bobby Lashley
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[The Naitch]

* Elijah Burke
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* René Duprée
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[The Naitch]

BOBBY LASHLEY HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!!!!!

[The Naitch]

OWWWW MY HERNIA!!!!!

(Dupree eliminates himself over the top rope)

* Elijah Burke
* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[The One]

Nash: Get out of the ring.

Elijah: Why me?

Nash: Because you're black!

* Daivari
* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn
* Big Show

[The One]

No. Naitch is the man, and if he says Lashley and Dupree are out, they stay out...plus, it's Lashley and Dupree, who wants them to win anyway? Point is, THEY REMAIN ELIMINATED...SO SAYETH THE MOST SENIOR MEMBER OF THIS HERE THREAD THINGY!

[The One]

Actually I just realised Crimson posted in here, and he is like a month my senior...THAN I SPEAKETH FROM THE AUTHORITY OF THE UNITED FAG ALLIANCE! THE BIG BLACK MAN AND THE FRUITY FRENCH DUDE STAY ELIMINATED!

[The Naitch]

Hulk Hogan run in and eliminates Big Show setting up their culminating feud at WrestleMania 23

* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test
* Kevin Thorn

[The Naitch]

*The One comes back from his piss break*

The One: What did I miss?

The Naitch: Hogan

The One: :nono:

[D Mac]

:rant:

[The One]

Hey, why wasn't Nash enterted into this tournament. I mean, he was a 37 time ECW Champion. Now history buffs might dispute that and state he never once steped foot in an arena were and ECW event has ever been held, but I maintain he was at least a 37 time champion...with each of his reigns lasting at least 2 or 3 years. Yeah, the awesome power of Nash. :y:

[The Naitch]

*The Naitch throws some debris at Diesel Mac*

[D Mac]

*ducks*

[The One]

*Nash does a triple flip splash on Diesel Mac*

[D Mac]

*no sells*

[The Naitch]

*Meanwhile on the other side of the arena*

http://img184.imageshack.us/img184/3962/13ur1.jpg

Heyman: Who booked this crap?

[The One]

*While all this happens, all the people eliminate themselves...*

NASH WINS! KEVIN NASH WINS THE BATTLE ROYAL!

[D Mac]

This is EXTREME!

[The One]

Joey Styles: Kevin Nash just messed with his hair! OH MY GOD!

"HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!"

[The Naitch]

*Nash tears his quad*

http://img176.imageshack.us/img176/1100/45cr0.jpg

[LoDownM]

lol @ the last few posts

[The One]

*Nash refuses to work any more matches and is going to semi-retire having beat everyone in ECW...*

[ron the dial]

:rofl: This is the funniest shit.

[The One]

http://www.kevinbigsexynash.com/images/leno3.jpg

Leno: So yeah, now tell us about what just happened here...

Nash: Well as you can see I did a super flip of death on that Diesel Mac fellow, then all the other wrestlers got scared and fled the ringside area, and me being the only person who could hurt myself, I tore my quad for the fans, cause that's what it's all about. Becoming the top guy and then magically getting an injury before you have to put someone else over.

:y:

[The Naitch]

http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/7548/77hv9.jpg

*OUT COMES HOGAN!!!!!!*

http://img169.imageshack.us/img169/82/45tq0.jpg

*Nash is pissed!*

http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/8818/17um6.jpg

*Diesel Mac marks the fuck out*

http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/2892/07vf5.jpg

WHATCHOOOGONNADO WHEN HULKAMANIA RUNS WILD ON E-C-W!!!!!

[The One]

Nash: I made a career out of being unstopable...

Unless you're a finger...

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/05/tap.jpg

A pier...

http://www.creationmatrix.com/mc/heroclix/pictures/tmnt/supershredder.jpg

Or myself...

http://www.areavoices.com/wrestling/images/thumbnail/kevinnash.gif

[The Naitch]

the card is set:

ECW One Night Stand III

ECW Championship: Hulk Hogan vs. Kevin Nash

[The One]

Correction! ECW Championship on the line...Hogan vs. Nash...Hulk Hogan's NEW couch on a pole match!

You must get the couch, and successfully get up sustaining an injury so bad it becomes impossible for you to lay down for a pin.

[D Mac]

Ok Moving along.

Kevin Thorn turns into a bat and flies away.

* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow
* Test

[El Fangel]

* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* Sabu
* The Sandman
* Al Snow

Test roids dealer walks by ringside, Test jumps out and chases him, thus eliminating himself.

[Xero]

Suddenly, Paul Heyman comes out and beats the shit out of Sabu, constantly yelling "SEE WHAT YOU DID TO ECW!? STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY STASH! I KNOW HOW TO KEEP THE SHIT!" He throws him out, drags him up the ramp and throws him off the stage. He then mocks RVD and goes to the back, seemingly looking for him.

* Tommy Dreamer
* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* The Sandman
* Al Snow

[KingofOldSchool]

Tommy Dreamer realizes that he should've been eliminated hours ago and casually flings hismelf over the top rope through 15 flaming tables with thumbtacks on them.

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Little Guido
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* The Sandman
* Al Snow

[The Naitch]

*The pizzaboy walks out with a pizza to the ring*

Pizzaboy: Hey yo, did anybody order a large anchovie pizza?

Little Guido: Over here!

*Little Guido tosses himself over the top rope and pays for the pizza*

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* The Sandman
* Al Snow

[PorkSoda]

Suddenly, Head comes down teh aisle in a giant snowplow in GI Joe outfit. In Fear, Al Snow runs through the crowd, eliminating himself.

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards
* The Sandman

[The Naitch]

*Vince McMahon comes out and grabs the mic*

Vince: SANDMAN? Never heard of you. This is an ECW Battle Royal. E-C-W! I don't think you were even in ECW. Get out of the ring. YOUUUU'RE FIRED

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Shannon Moore
* Stevie Richards

[The Naitch]

all star line up right there

[The One]

What are you guys doing? Kevin Nash won. End of story.

[D Mac]

I'll add Nash along with the winner of this to the triple threat match and make it a fatal fourway, how about that?

[Crippla]

Spoiler: Balls wins.

[The One]

I'll add Nash along with the winner of this to the triple threat match and make it a fatal fourway, how about that?

Acceptable...:y:

[The One]

*Shannon Moore see a sale at Victoria's Secert and realises he needs some new bras and panties...he elimintes himself in a hurry...*

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney
* Tony Mamaluke
* Stevie Richards

[D Mac]

Thank you all mighty TOVO!

[D Mac]

Tony Mamaluke sees Vito in a dress at ringside and eliminates himself to go buy one alongside the toughest man to ever wear a dress.

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney
* Stevie Richards

[Crippla]

Stevie Richards can't win a match, he's a jobber so he gets eliminated.

* Hardcore Holly
* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney

[Jeritron]

DDP comes out and diamond cuts Holly's head off. Then he picks it up like a soccer ball and punts it into the crowd while Mahoney and Knox tear his body to shreds and fling it over the top ropes

* Mike Knox
* Balls Mahoney

[Skippord]

Mike Knox sees the police coming to arrest him for domestic disturbances and Balls knocks him out of the ring

* Balls Mahoney

[Crippla]

Spoiler: Balls wins.
Looks like I called it.

[Crimson]

:|

[El Fangel]

I second Crimsons :|. I mean WTF?

[CSL]

<font color=white>Wow, so Balls Mahoney vs. Rory McAllister vs. William Regal. Smell the buyratessss</font>

[Crippla]

Don't forget Kevin Nash. That's the big draw.

[Rammsteinmad]

That ending was bad... I woulda gone with something witty like: "Mike Knox Balls Mahoney out of the ring to win". Ta da! :D