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Xero
01-24-2007, 08:25 PM
http://www.wwe.com/shows/royalrumble/exclusives/rrecs

http://www.wwe.com/content/media/images/309846/1922582/3968516/20070122_rum_donts21.jpg

This Sunday, the Royal Rumble will be held in San Antonio, Texas and feature a star studded 30-Man Royal Rumble Match. Superstars can only be eliminated if they are thrown over the top rope. In the unlikely event that you find yourself in a Royal Rumble Match, here are ten helpful hints from WWE.com.

Don’t: Try to pin someone

Dear Mr. Savage circa 1993, do you see a ref in the ring? Neither do we. Maybe that’s because the Royal Rumble Match is an OVER-THE-TOP-ROPE Battle Royal, silly. Next time you’re in the Royal Rumble you better study up on the rules, but don’t worry, it’s probably going to be a while.

Don’t: Try to hide in Viscera’s pajamas

Yes, they look awfully comfortable, but if the World's Biggest Love Machine finds you hiding in his duds, you’ll most likely earn a free ride to elimination-ville.

Don’t: Threaten to throw 30 men over the top rope

Many a WWE Superstar has claimed that he will win the Royal Rumble Match by “throwing 30 men over the top rope.” Obviously these guys could use a math lesson from Matt Striker, or at least a couple of episodes of Sesame Street.

Don’t: Put on a disguise and pretend you’re just passing through

It might sound like a good strategy, but only Eugene would miss a giant pink bunny sneaking out of the ring, and unfortunately, Eugene’s not in the match.

Don’t: Climb to the top rope

While the top rope can assist you in doing some significant damage to your opponent, it can also leave you open for a very easy elimination— even a visit to Dr. Rios.

Don’t: Take a break to ask for autographs

We know this is your first Royal Rumble Match, Miz, but please try to restrain your inner fanboy until after the match.

Don’t: Run to the ring

What’s the rush? Be more like the Repo Man. Have a hot dog, pull up a chair to chat with fans, maybe even take a nap. Bottom line: take your time. Just like life, the Royal Rumble Match is a marathon, not a 100-meter dash.

Don’t: Eliminate yourself

Mick Foley must have still been recovering from a chair shot to the head when he abandoned ship during the 2004 Royal Rumble Match. To Mick’s credit, he did eliminate himself to beat down Randy Orton, so who can really blame him?

Don’t: Start crying

When you see a group of powerful WWE Superstars rushing at you, this might seem like the only thing you can do. Our advice? Man up, pal. Crying isn’t going to help you, and please, there are Divas around— try not to embarrass yourself.

Do: Make sure you have a will beforehand

When you step into the ring with WWE Superstars, you might just need it.

Crippla
01-24-2007, 08:26 PM
Don't try to hide in Viscera's pajamas.

FourFifty
01-24-2007, 08:36 PM
Don’t: Take a break to ask for autographs

We know this is your first Royal Rumble Match, Miz, but please try to restrain your inner fanboy until after the match.


I'm not sure if I want to laugh or kill.....

Kane Knight
01-24-2007, 09:10 PM
:rofl:

The Naitch
01-24-2007, 09:13 PM
they should've used this opportunity to take more shots at Kurt Angle

ron the dial
01-24-2007, 09:16 PM
That guy hiding in Viscera's pants is hilarious.

ClockShot
01-24-2007, 09:44 PM
Don’t: Run to the ring

What’s the rush? Be more like the Repo Man. Have a hot dog, pull up a chair to chat with fans, maybe even take a nap. Bottom line: take your time. Just like life, the Royal Rumble Match is a marathon, not a 100-meter dash.

I miss that guy.

the wwe champion
01-24-2007, 10:40 PM
lol to the topic

the Illusionist
01-24-2007, 11:47 PM
I'm not sure if I want to laugh or kill.....

that deusche the miz would be handing out autographs, never mind asking for them.

Inadequacy
01-25-2007, 12:06 AM
I have to say, while not very safe, Visceras pajamas are INCREDIBLY comfortable.

El Fangel
01-25-2007, 12:11 AM
POTY?

Blitz
01-25-2007, 01:09 AM
Somebody make that guy in Viscera's pants pic into their avatar.

Rammsteinmad
01-25-2007, 02:33 AM
Didn't laugh at the text. But the picture was pretty lol.

Blitz
01-25-2007, 02:38 AM
http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/413/viscera16do.jpg

There, I've done the work.

D Mac
01-25-2007, 02:56 AM
Not only did Randy Savage try to pin someone in a Rumble, he eliminated himself also.

Crippla
01-25-2007, 04:23 AM
http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/413/viscera16do.jpg

There, I've done the work.
K

tucsonspeed6
01-25-2007, 08:51 AM
Prediction: This article is a hint for what will happen this year. Little Bastard will hide in Viscera's pants, disguised as some corned beef or something, and he will eliminate viscera from the inside out.

Xero
01-25-2007, 08:54 AM
Prediction: This article is a hint for what will happen this year. Little Bastard will hide in Viscera's pants, disguised as some corned beef or something, and he will eliminate viscera from the inside out.
What about the "King of the World" thing? Could it mean....

CHRIS FUCKING JERICHO!?

tucsonspeed6
01-25-2007, 11:02 AM
What about the "King of the World" thing? Could it mean....

CHRIS FUCKING JERICHO!?


or maybe Leonardo Fucking DeCaprio? Hmm...:shifty:

Kane Knight
01-25-2007, 12:37 PM
Or maybe Lisa?

Oh, right. She was "Queen of the World!"

...Of spelling.,

TerranRich
01-25-2007, 12:48 PM
that deusche the miz would be handing out autographs, never mind asking for them.
LOL, worst spelling of "douche" ever :rofl:

Oh, and the "King of the World" cartoon looks an awful lot like Cena. And "King of the World" is a reference to Muhammed Ali ... obviously.

M-A-G
01-25-2007, 02:06 PM
I hear hiding in Viscera's jammies was going to be the original way Rey Mysterio was going to win last year's Rumble but they shot it down.

addy2hotty
01-25-2007, 02:17 PM
What about the "King of the World" thing? Could it mean....

CHRIS FUCKING JERICHO!?

Don't do it Xero. It hurts when you say things like this. I don't want to be out of here apart from spoilers, but if you keep breaking my heart like that. I might have to.

He's still coming back one day to me dammit.

Kane Knight
01-25-2007, 06:10 PM
LOL, worst spelling of "douche" ever :rofl:

Oh, and the "King of the World" cartoon looks an awful lot like Cena. And "King of the World" is a reference to Muhammed Ali ... obviously.

To be fair, he was subconsciously affected by my "Springtime for Hitler" post. He was trying to spell Deutchland (However it's spelled).

TerranRich
01-26-2007, 12:52 PM
Doucheland.