Official RAW Thread (5/28/2007): Memorial Day MAYHEM

[St. Jimmy]

http://www.wwe.com/content/media/images/Headers/4144570
http://www.wwe.com/content/media/touts/feature/29062/4769250

Things are likely to get extreme on Raw (http://www.wwe.com/shows/raw/) as the flagship sails into Toronto, its final destination before One Night Stand.


Headlining a monumental Memorial Day edition of Raw, WWE Champion John Cena (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/johncena/) teams with Bobby Lashley (http://www.wwe.com/shows/ecw/superstars/lashley/) to face the oversized and massively dangerous team of The Great Khali (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/thegreatkhali/), Umaga (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/umaga/) and Shane McMahon (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/shanemcmahon/) in a 2-on-3 Handicap Match. A handful of days before One Night Stand, these five men will have a stand-off on Raw, but in what condition will these combatants leave? What impact will the wreckage have on The Champ before he defends the gold against Khali for a second time? Will Lashley lose a foothole in his conquest of the ECW (http://www.wwe.com/shows/ecw/) World Championship? Is this all part of an elaborate web spun by the WWE Chairman?


Speaking of the youngest McMahon male, the Chairman’s son will make a huge announcement on Raw. What foundations will be shook following this mysterious announcement? How will it affect the WWE Superstars as they head into war at One Night Stand? How will it affect the world of sports-entertainment beyond the Extreme Rules pay-per-view?


Also, just as things are heating up outside, the WWE Divas are ready set to turn up the temperature even more in the Memorial Day Bikini Beach Blast Battle Royal, which will kickoff Raw tonight. Be sure to spend your holiday with the Sexiest Women on Television as they rumble on Raw for Diva supremacy. The Divas scheduled to take part in this jaw-dropping match are Candice (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/candice/), Mickie James (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/mickiejames/), Maria (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/maria/), Jillian (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/smackdown/jillian/), Layla, Brooke (http://www.wwe.com/shows/ecw/superstars/brooke/), Kelly Kelly (http://www.wwe.com/shows/ecw/superstars/kellykelly/), Michelle McCool (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/smackdown/michellemccool/), Kristal (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/smackdown/kristal/) and Melina (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/melina/). The winner will be awarded a special WWE.com photo shoot.


Cade & Murdoch also continued down a new path last week. With The Hardys under attack by The World's Greatest Tag Team, Kenny Dykstra (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/kennydykstra/) & Johnny Nitro (http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/johnnynitro/), Cade & Murdoch rushed to the ring to help the World Tag Team Champions just one night after they challenged them for the gold. Once again, the Southerners shook hands with the champions, taking another step down the path of sportsmanship. Have Cade & Murdoch aligned themselves on the "good side" once and for all?


Don’t miss all the action on Raw, Monday night at 9/8 CT on USA Network, sponsored by:




http://www.40ouncebeer.com/pics400/pabstbottle.jpg
FUCKING DRINK IT, PUSSIES.

[IC Champion]

It doesnt start until 9:15 in Canada for some reason.

[Volchok]

Woo first Raw thread that i'll actually be in the full time.

[ClockShot]

Nice opening. Evening folks.

[gatoconbotas]

Say what you want about WWE, at least they respect the military and whatnot.
Nice video there.


....
.




Then they show the RAW opening video and fuck it all up.
Twats.

[gatoconbotas]

Bikini Beach Blast Battle Royal.
What the hell.

[Volchok]

Well atleast they're getting the Diva shit out of the way first.... WOOOO MICKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[St. Jimmy]

Candice isn't very sexy.

[St. Jimmy]

OH MY GOD, I LOVE MARIA.

[gatoconbotas]

WHERE'S MELINA?
AND VICTORIA?

[Linkbowler]

Tittie time.

[Volchok]

Do they seriously just re-use entrance themes for Divas?

[Skippord]

Candice isn't very sexy.
I firmly disagree

[gatoconbotas]

There she is.
That's hot. :-)))

[KingofOldSchool]

WOOO can't wait for the Cena boos.

[Skippord]

Melina is not hot at all

sorry

[gatoconbotas]

Candice isn't very sexy.


I agree.
WET MELINA
HOTTER

[ClockShot]

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

I'd rather watch Miss Universe than this crap.

[St. Jimmy]

STRIPPER FIGHT!

[Linkbowler]

Is that a We Want Pussy chant?

[gatoconbotas]

Melina is not hot at all

sorry

I have a thing for latinas.
I can't help it.

[Volchok]

God I love titties :)

[gatoconbotas]

LOL @ JR.
Thanks for comming, we'll see you tomorrow on SCI-FI

[St. Jimmy]

NOT MARIA =/

[RP]

Is this for real? I just wanted to see some wrestling. Seriously? Is this a fucking joke?

[DCXtreme]

Cmon maria have a malfunction

[KingofOldSchool]

I'd start bashing everyone in the head with the water guns.

[RP]

nah i'd fuck

[St. Jimmy]

Ratings are going down quickly.

[Volchok]

who has the polka dots? she's hot.

[DCXtreme]

what a clusterfuck lol

[RP]

lol she threw a towel.

[Gone Mad]

MICKIE! :'(

[St. Jimmy]

Mickie :drool:

[gatoconbotas]

LOL
This is terrible.

[DCXtreme]

Melina should go into porn

[KingofOldSchool]

BELLY-TO-BELLY :eek:

[RP]

oh neat ...they're doing moves

[Skippord]

lol JR

[St. Jimmy]

This borders on Porn.

[KingofOldSchool]

Sooooo why did the choose Michelle to finish the match with Melina instead of Candice or Mickie?

[Volchok]

Nice fuckin ass yo... I love Michelle McCool.

[RP]

lol Melina rolling out.

[DCXtreme]

OH DEAR.. lol, at least let her kick you out again dont roll out

[ClockShot]

I want those 12 minutes back!

[gatoconbotas]

Melina.
Hot. Wet. Latina.
::drool::

[Gone Mad]

I love that this is a Memorial Day bikini match thing. Because nothing says Memorial Day and paying tribute to those who died than girls in bikinis.

[DCXtreme]

I want to say at least they got the shit out the way early but i know there'll be more :(

[Linkbowler]

Because nothing says Memorial Day and paying tribute to those who died than girls in bikinis.

Girls out of bikinis.

[RP]

Tits save the world

[KingofOldSchool]

So either Shane is announcing the Draft Lottery or that he, Umaga, and Khali are facing Lashley and Cena tonight.

[Volchok]

So what's up people? How is everyone doin tonight?

[Kane Knight]

OH DEAR.. lol, at least let her kick you out again dont roll out

LOL yeah.

[gatoconbotas]

Probably draft lottery.
Which doesn't make sense because he has no real power in WWE.
But, since hwen do they make sense?

[Gone Mad]

I'd say the announcement is the Draft Lottery.

[Linkbowler]

Shane's announcement: Daniel Alfredsson is Jesus.

[Londoner]

Whats the point in the draft lottery when the wrestlers switch shows anyway?

[RP]

This is a very unemotional promo by Shane.

[Volchok]

woo... a draft.

[ClockShot]

FLOAT LIKE A BUTTERFLY, STING LIKE A BEE!

[St. Jimmy]

Shane's promo was pretty ass.

[Corndad]

evening fellas. What I miss? sounds like porn lol

[Linkbowler]

2-1 Senators. Hell yeah.

[gatoconbotas]

LOL useless 22 minutes of RAW
Shitty Diva match.
Shane announces stupid stuff.
And somebody's going to be his honey? Did I hear that right?

[DCXtreme]

Guys I am BEGGING you in the UK.. go to "Kiss Signed" one of the music channels, funny as fuck

[St. Jimmy]

I wonder how many people want a Refund now for the ONS tickets.

[Volchok]

Remember when Raw used to be good?

[Gone Mad]

Didn't they film Saturday Night Main Event before Raw tonight? It looks like it.

The one night I have off to see Raw and it's not looking like a good one. Then again, it's been off for a couple weeks now.

[St. Jimmy]

UGH, Hardys need to be on SmackDown.

[Volchok]

Wow a tag team match?!

[gatoconbotas]

Remember when Raw used to be good?

That's beyond te scope of my memory.

Why do Hardy's have pyro?
And why do we clap to thier music?
I don't get it.

[St. Jimmy]

aka Off My TV

[Volchok]

8 Man tag match? holy shit.

[KingofOldSchool]

So is Cade and Murdoch finally going to "shock the world" and turn on the Hardys tonight?

[St. Jimmy]

an 8 MAN TAG?! wtf is this, iMPACT!?!

[JT]

So they are just "The Hardy's" now?

[Volchok]

Yeah wtf is with this shit? I honestly don't get it.

[St. Jimmy]

I hope the Draft breaks up every tag team on the roster.

[ClockShot]

Hey. Johnn.........WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

[gatoconbotas]

Didn't they film Saturday Night Main Event before Raw tonight? It looks like it.


Yeha.
No mention by commentary or anything for the change of set.
Nice.

[KingofOldSchool]

Johnny "My Push Is Dead" Nitro

[St. Jimmy]

lol, what the fuck Ken.

[JT]

Remember when Raw used to be good?

I do sadly...I'm also sad to know that was 7 years ago.

[FourFifty]

It's around 6:30pm here..... normally I'm hyped up, but this week.... ahhhh.... I don't give a fuck. Seriously, nothing short of Melina eating out Mickie James, someone shooting Cena, and the return of Goldust could make me give a fuck.

[St. Jimmy]

Johnny "Charisma like Sonjay Dutt" Nitro.

[JT]

Johnny "My Push Is Dead" Nitro

Seriously though, that's serious horseshit. He was one of the few things I liked about Raw...he needs to learn how to politic a little.

[Volchok]

Lol at JRs comments about Cade and Murdoch possibly getting split up, yet Matt Hardy is on Smackdown and Jeff is on Raw yet they're tag champs.

[gatoconbotas]

Lol at JRs comments about Cade and Murdoch possibly getting split up, yet Matt Hardy is on Smackdown and Jeff is on Raw yet they're tag champs.

LOL.
I love that government-mule abusing hoss.

[St. Jimmy]

Don't worry about Johhny Nitro, he'll eventually be buried by the ghost of Triple H

[FourFifty]

So the draft is tonight? Ah, I heard about this. Spoilers below, higlight to read

Still don't give a fuck

[Skippord]

Sonjay Dutt is a charisma machine

[gatoconbotas]

Miami.
I mean....Minnesota.
Not like they're on opposite sides of the fucking country, or anything.

[gatoconbotas]

Sonjay Dutt is a charisma machine

Who is this Sonjay Dutt?

[St. Jimmy]

Oh, so they're going to use the Ticker tonight to advertise. Nice.

[FourFifty]

Okay, it's not tonight, but my spoilers stand.

[FourFifty]

Who is this Sonjay Dutt?

That question answers itself.

[St. Jimmy]

Trevor Murdoch with a Flying Cross Body? :wtf:

[gatoconbotas]

King called it a belly flop.
I less than three that statement.

[KingofOldSchool]

Did I just hear JR say "Get Er Done?"

[6to1]

Johnny "Charisma like Sonjay Dutt" Nitro.
yea they need nash to help him out

[gatoconbotas]

Did I just hear JR say "Get Er Done?"
Sadly, yes.

[gatoconbotas]

I want this extreme cheese quesadilla from Taco Bell.

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>I'm assuming it'll be like the original draft. 10 picks per show and the rest decided after via "random" draft lottery. Otherwise none of the teams could reasonably stay together.

ie

"ECW selects Shad Gaspard!"
"Fine, Smackdown will take JTG then!"
"Raw takes Shelton Benjamin"
"Then ECW takes Charlie Haas!"</font>

[St. Jimmy]

Front Chancery is a bitch.

[St. Jimmy]

Haas with his variation of the Angry Face.

[Volchok]

Lol who is gonna pick for each show?

[Londoner]

I have barely watched Raw tonight, i think im giving up wrestling altogether.

[gatoconbotas]

JR, Michale Cole, and...who announces for ECW?

[KingofOldSchool]

<font color=goldenrod>I'm assuming it'll be like the original draft. 10 picks per show and the rest decided after via "random" draft lottery. Otherwise none of the teams could reasonably stay together.

ie

"ECW selects Shad Gaspard!"
"Fine, Smackdown will take JTG then!"
"Raw takes Shelton Benjamin"
"Then ECW takes Charlie Haas!"</font>

Please welcome Shad Gaspard and Charlie Haas...The World's Greatest Cryme!

[St. Jimmy]

SD!: Teddy Long/Eddie's Wife
Raw: Coach
ECW: Vince

[ClockShot]

God. Those lights have got to go.

Also noticed the red ring posts. Wonder if it was for SNME.

[gatoconbotas]

aGAIN, WHY CLAPPING??

[St. Jimmy]

Oh. Shelton has the mic... this bodes well :shifty:

[Corndad]

Hardcore Rules Hardys vs WGTT. NICE.

[KingofOldSchool]

Ladder Match wooooo

[St. Jimmy]

Meh. Boring.

[Volchok]

WWE is so fuckin ridiculous sometimes...

[Corndad]

Wow. even better. Ladder match

[The Genius]

matt hardy has negative sideburns

wtf?!

[Gone Mad]

Love the look on Murdoch's face when the match was made. Just a hint of where this might be going.

[Londoner]

Ah i might make this 'ECW'*cough* PPV the last PPV I ever watch.

[St. Jimmy]

I wish RAW had a midcard worth anything.

[gatoconbotas]

I hate Todd Grisham.
And....wait?!

Isn't he ring announcing too?

[Evil Vito]

<font color=goldenrod>Also, I hope to hell they give ECW or Smackdown the first pick so that Cena can get the fuck off of Raw</font>

[St. Jimmy]

Yeah, gonna go read the SNME spoilers real quick.

[gatoconbotas]

Khali chop.
LOL.

I liked John Cena ...never.

[St. Jimmy]

Yeah, that was a waste of time.

[Londoner]

I wish Raw had a WWE champ worth anything.

[gatoconbotas]

Holy nostrils batman!
Cena needs a nosejob

[Gone Mad]

A friend of mine was like "Bro, we gotta see ONS this weekend!" I just told him, " Umm, yeaaaaah, because McMahon/Lashley is gonna be a 5 star classic, you know."

No thank you to ONS.

[Kane Knight]

The Hardyz/WGTT deal will probably be the best thing of the night.

[KingofOldSchool]

I hate Todd Grisham.
And....wait?!

Isn't he ring announcing too?

Justin Roberts is announcing.

[St. Jimmy]

I love how the crowd is silenced for the Cena promo. Nevermind, there's the boos.

[Skippord]

Fuck I tried to take a pissbreak but he's still talking

[KingofOldSchool]

The Hardyz/WGTT deal will probably be the best thing of the night.

What about that ***** 1/2 match between Cena and Khali?

[St. Jimmy]

That's funny John, I thought your Critics said things like "Die Cena Die" and "You Can't Wrestle *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*"

[gatoconbotas]

I like how the Castrol GTX sludge commercial is more entertaining than Cena.

And I've seen it before.

[St. Jimmy]

I like how ANAL RAPE is more entertaining than CENA.

[St. Jimmy]

John Cusak, and Sam Jackson in the same movie? I'm sold.

[gatoconbotas]

Anal rape and cena in the same sentance.
Fits.

[St. Jimmy]

Mariaaaaaa

[Corndad]

is this how many lame interviews can be done in a row?

[St. Jimmy]

LOL. "IT'S A MEEEEE, MARIOOOOO"

[KingofOldSchool]

"I ah deliver a many a pizzas to ah many ah differentah brands!"

[Skippord]

I like how ANAL RAPE is more entertaining than CENA.
Anal rape is pretty entertaining

[Kane Knight]

I love how the crowd is silenced for the Cena promo. Nevermind, there's the boos.

Did he get booed? I put the TV on mute.

[gatoconbotas]

Damn,
Marella's goona be hitting Maria.
Randy Orton is gay.

[St. Jimmy]

Poor Maria, she seems so unhappy with the retard gimmick.

[RP]

Did someone poop on Randy Ortons chest?

[Skippord]

Has Orton been doing meth through his chest

[ClockShot]

Get taps playing.

[St. Jimmy]

ROBERT VON DOOOOOOOOOOM

[St. Jimmy]

that young man is like 34.

[gatoconbotas]

I wish I could look as gay as Orton when I pose.

[Batsu]

Wait a minute, RVD? I thought he was gone from WWE.

[Kane Knight]

RVD's final match before he joins Amsterdam Championship Wrestling.

[Kane Knight]

Wait a minute, RVD? I thought he was gone from WWE.

He's turned down negotiations for a new contract. He's not gone til the contract ends.

[Batsu]

Oh, GOD that looks GAY.

[Kane Knight]

LOL@ Another Headlock, Randy?

[St. Jimmy]

I wish I could look as gay as Orton when I pose.

You don't posess that special "Douchebag" gene.

[Batsu]

He's turned down negotiations for a new contract. He's not gone til the contract ends.

Well that explains it.
I wonder if the crowd knows this, too.

[St. Jimmy]

RVD through the AIRRRRRRR.

[RP]

Ok that didnt need a " Holy shit holy shit " chant. comon

[Batsu]

that has to be the second worst "Holy shit" ever.

[Kane Knight]

Well that explains it.
I wonder if the crowd knows this, too.

That would make them smarks, and smarks are a minority. :roll:

[gatoconbotas]

Over an hour in, and only two real matches.
Wow.
What - a - waste

[KingofOldSchool]

that has to be the second worst "Holy shit" ever.

What is number 1?

[Kane Knight]

Over an hour in, and only two real matches.
Wow.
What - a - waste

*clap clap clapclapclap*

What - a - waste

*clap clap clapclapclap*

[Skippord]

Randy Orton the legend concussor

[Batsu]

What is number 1?

It was recent, and it was some crap spot involving Shawn Michaels. I think, Khali also. They just said it just to say it.

[gatoconbotas]

so THAT's how they're going to bury him.
Have him go out of his mind and not actually be pinned, just lose matches.

[Londoner]

lol, so this is how they're making RVD leave...

[KingofOldSchool]

Woooo a Rob Van Dam concusion angle.

I think RVD could pull this off, all you have to do is act dazed and confused all of the time.

And that's something RVD knows all too well.

[Batsu]

LMAO @ that RKO.

[Skippord]

Sick RKO

[Gone Mad]

LOL I want a pic of RVD's face.

And a holy shit to that RKO, that looked crazy.

[6to1]

why stop the match rvd allways looks like that

[ClockShot]

OH MY GOD!

[KingofOldSchool]

Rob: ...Dude...where am I?

Sandman: What the fuck Rob? You're not on camera, get out of your fucking gimmick!

Rob: ...what? But...I am out of my gimmick dude.

Sandman: God damn fucker.

[Kane Knight]

Orton had those five guys chanting "RKO."

Think Cena's jealous that he got twice the positive response?

[gatoconbotas]

RVD's hurt...oh no...Look at that sick bastard Randy Orton.
(moments pause)
LATER TONIGHT! CENA!!!1

[Linkbowler]

What is number 1?

Ass Punch.

[KingofOldSchool]

Well obviously you haven't spent a Saturday night with RVD then.

[Batsu]

I remember Carlito once "Reigns" Neckbreakered Victoria and spat an apple upon her. Now they unite.

[Skippord]

lol at JR supporting a figure four on a woman

[KingofOldSchool]

I remember Carlito once "Reigns" Neckbreakered Victoria and spat an apple upon her. Now they unite.

OMGZ AND VICTORIA AND TORRIE USE TO TEAM UP AND NOW THEY ARE WRESTLING EACH OTHER!!!11!

THAT'S CRAZ-E!

[Batsu]

And Carlito with the ANAL JIHAD FOR THE WIN!

[Corndad]

backcracker on Torrie LOL

[gatoconbotas]

I wish I could back-cracker (or assault) my ex-girlfriend.
And have it be "legal"

[Batsu]

I knew he was gonna do that... at least they finally gave that finisher a proper name. After how long?

[Gone Mad]

Mmm, Vicky :drool:

I hope they put Carlito alittle higher in the cards than they're making him now. Maybe some sort of title shot in the future. He'd be awesome if they'd let him be.

[Skippord]

*Backstabber

[Corndad]

wow this Raw is just so Blah for me tonight.

[gatoconbotas]

HOLY SHIT.
LOL
Khali and umaga.

[KingofOldSchool]

ROFL

[Corndad]

greatest promo ever right there lol

[Skippord]

lol

[UmbrellaCorporation]

LOL @ Khali/Umaga

[Batsu]

LMAO @ Khali and Umaga.

CRAPFEST '07!

[gatoconbotas]

RAHWAHAAHAHAHAHAWAHAR

habfbuabfhabidbajbfahi.

RAHWAHAHAHHARHAHRHA

habidihabyhiandjfahibiadi

RAWHAHRAHRAHRAHRHARHAhabidahbiyanbdHABIDIADAhabifeabe

LOL

[KingofOldSchool]

It's the 2007 version of Heidenreich and Snitsky

[gatoconbotas]

Damn, I was goona call it quits on RAW tonight.

Then I saw that promo.
Made the ENTIRE show.
I'm going to continue watching now.

[Batsu]

The Masterpiss is still on Raw? Dang it.

[ClockShot]

Masters vs. Santino. Round 3?

[Corndad]

tell me He goes to beat up Maria and Punk comes out lol thats the only way this ends good.

[Skippord]

Masters is slowly but surely roiding up again

[ClockShot]

*hits mute button*

[Corndad]

And here comes the music lol

[Skippord]

GAY

[gatoconbotas]

Ok, even after the UMAGA/KHALI promo, that ruined it again.
I'm leaving RAW. for now.

Peace out trouts.

[Corndad]

still boggles my mind that Khali is main eventing PPVs.

[KingofOldSchool]

Ya know with the reactions Cena always gets in Toronto, I'm surprised WWE even goes back there.

[Kane Knight]

Worst. Prom date. Ever.

[Batsu]

LMAO @ the Cena Sucks/Let's Go Cena battle.

[Kane Knight]

Ya know with the reactions Cena always gets in Toronto, I'm surprised WWE even goes back there.

Why? They clearly don't pay attention to reactions.

Also, LOL@ At the "I was shouting Booo-Urns..." Sign.

And King just proved my point, by pointing out only the "Let's Go Cena!" Chants.

[KingofOldSchool]

Why? They clearly don't pay attention to reactions.

Also, LOL@ At the "I was shouting Booo-Urns..." Sign.

And King just proved my point, by pointing out only the "Let's Go Cena!" Chants.

Huh?

Lawler mentioned the "Cena Sucks" chants as well.

[ClockShot]

Shane gotta watch a few Randy Savage or HBK videos. That elbow drop sucked.

All in all. Another lackluster raw. Good night everyone. Happy Memorial Day.

[DAMN iNATOR]

Huh?

Lawler mentioned the "Cena Sucks" chants as well.

Yeah, only he said something like “half the crowd can’t decide whether to be for or against Cena”.

But anyway, yeah, RAW tonight was just GOD AWFUL.:nono: I’m surprised (and I’m sure plenty of you are disappointed) that sitting through the whole 2 hours and 5 minutes didn’t make me physically ill, or worse kill me...

:n: :n: tonight. As far as grading, a big, giant, “F ” .

[FourFifty]

Fucking hell, I can't believe I was suckered into watching that shit. "Hey, wanna hang out?" I said sure, hoping to not see Raw... but Raw was on their agenda....
Before Raw I downed a couple of NoDoz with a monster, and it STILL put me to sleep.

[SammyG]

Pretty terrible Raw, indeed. See, that's what happens when Kennedy is injured and off tv.