View Full Version : Austin Quits WWE to Pursue a Career in Hunting
Loose Cannon
03-11-2004, 12:29 PM
Credit Wrestlingplanet.com
We have just been informed that 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin has officially quit the WWE to pursue a career as a professional hunter. Austin told management this morning that his appearence at Wrestlemania 20 this Sunday will be his last appearence in a WWE ring. Austin was quite emotional during this meeting as he thanked everyone for bringing him back and said wrestling will always have a place in his heart. Austin had been planning on a career after wrestling for quite some time now and since he loves to hunt and is quite good at it, he wants to see if he has what it takes to turn pro. WWE Management thanked Austin for everything he has given them throughout the years and wishes him best of luck in his future endeavors.
With all specualtion of Brock leaving after Wrestlemania and with Goldberg's contract up, one would have to wonder what the outcome of the match will be now that all three men involved in the match won't be back in the WWE after Sunday.
Danny Electric
03-11-2004, 12:32 PM
I hope this is a joke. :shifty:
I also hope this is a joke.
The Dub
03-11-2004, 12:39 PM
I hope this is a joke. :shifty:
Of course it is. This is just mocking Brock possibly leaving to go to the NFL, which is prbably also a joke. It's usually the other way around. You retire from the real sport to do the fake sport. Can you imagine Brock Lesnar giving Tom Brady an F-5?
Of course it is. This is just mocking Brock possibly leaving to go to the NFL, which is prbably also a joke. It's usually the other way around. You retire from the real sport to do the fake sport. Can you imagine Brock Lesnar giving Tom Brady an F-5?
Really? You actually think this is a joke? :?:
Splaya
03-11-2004, 12:42 PM
This has to be a parody of brock
Fryza
03-11-2004, 12:46 PM
Can you imagine Brock Lesnar giving Tom Brady an F-5?
LMAO I can :D :love:
Draven
03-11-2004, 12:48 PM
I hope this isnt true, if it is then wtf is up with everyone leaving all of the sudden.
Rock Bottom
03-11-2004, 12:49 PM
rofl
Kane Knight
03-11-2004, 12:50 PM
Really? You actually think this is a joke? :?:
Yeah, I don't know why people would think a career of hunting isn't serious.
Rock Bottom
03-11-2004, 12:55 PM
This is either a parody or a huge work - if this is all real, OMG LOL, it's still hilarious. That they'd lose all three of these guys at 'Mania. After All these "dream match" talks. Austin has successfully avoided jobbing to both men. LOL.
KingofOldSchool
03-11-2004, 01:03 PM
WOW.
Look what I just saw...
Triple H Quits WWE to Pursue a Career in Glass Making
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Credit Wrestlingplanet.com
We have just been informed that Triple H has officially quit the WWE to pursue a career as a professional glass maker. Triple H told management this morning that his appearence at Wrestlemania 20 this Sunday will be his last appearence in a WWE ring. Triple H was quite emotional during this meeting as he thanked everyone for giving him an opportunity and said wrestling will always have a place in his heart. Triple H had been planning on a career after wrestling for quite some time now and since he loves to use glass to his advantage and is quite good at it, he wants to see if he has what it takes to turn pro. WWE Management thanked Triple H for everything he has given them throughout the years and wishes him best of luck in his future endeavors.
With all specualtion of Triple H leaving after Wrestlemania, one thinks it will be a given that HBK or Benoit will walk away from WM XX as the new World Heavyweight champion. However, talk is that Triple H will retain at Mania, only to retire as the "Greatest" World Heavyweight Champion of all time since no one was able to beat him for it.
Draven
03-11-2004, 01:05 PM
lol
Disturbed316
03-11-2004, 01:06 PM
lol
KingofOldSchool
03-11-2004, 01:07 PM
I've also heard rumor that BEE Windows have offered Triple H a job.
More on this breaking news story as we get it.
LOL at the Trips one. Gold.
Danny Electric
03-11-2004, 01:09 PM
The Triple H one is great.
The Naitch
03-11-2004, 01:09 PM
lol at thread
classic
This is either a parody or a huge work - if this is all real, OMG LOL, it's still hilarious. That they'd lose all three of these guys at 'Mania. After All these "dream match" talks. Austin has successfully avoided jobbing to both men. LOL.
I doubt its a huge work, or a parody. I would bet money on Austin leaving after Mania. He has walked out before, why wouldn't he again?
The Naitch
03-11-2004, 01:09 PM
This just in:
Shawn Michaels quits the WWE to become a Priest
Loose Cannon
03-11-2004, 01:14 PM
:lol: :lol: Sorry guys, I just had to do it.
This just in:
Shawn Michaels quits the WWE to become a Priest
LOL.
Sorry guys, I just had to do it.
:| Have you any idea how worried I was? Don't I look stupid now. :$
<font color=black> SHIFTY</font>
Danny Electric
03-11-2004, 01:20 PM
:lol: :lol: Sorry guys, I just had to do it.
:D
ColdwaVer
03-11-2004, 01:39 PM
credit: <font color=red>http://www.beatingthejoketodeath.com</font>
We have just been informed that Bubba Ray and D-Von, wrestling's famous Dudley Boys, have officially tendered their resignations to WWE. Their appearance at WM20 will be their last, according to their brother Spike. Official sources have confirmed that the Dudleyz plan to persue careers as professional furniture craftsman.
"We've been destroying tables for so many years," stated Bubba Ray, "and we now feel it's time to give something back to the furniture community."
Addittionally, we can exclusively reveal that Rob Van Dam, notoriously dissatisfied with his treatment by WWE management, will also be leaving the company immediately following WM20. His future plans are unknown, but word from his travel agent confirms that he has purchased plane tickets and passports to Jamaica, Colombia, Cuba, and Holland.
As-yet-unconfirmed reports have been stating that Chris Jericho plans on leaving both WWE and his band Fozzy, and after a quick marriage to Trish Stratus in Las Vegas, will be using his status as "King of the World" to attempt to negotiate peace in the Middle East.
At least one source is claiming that Mark Henry, Rikishi, and the Big Show have all quit WWE to become professional eaters. Several other sources claim that they did this years ago.
At least one source is claiming that Mark Henry, Rikishi, and the Big Show have all quit WWE to become professional eaters. Several other sources claim that they did this years ago.
:lol:
Draven
03-11-2004, 01:45 PM
again :lol:
KingofOldSchool
03-11-2004, 01:46 PM
LOL @ RVD
Savio
03-11-2004, 01:48 PM
I also hope this is a joke.
Splaya
03-11-2004, 01:49 PM
Well your a joke so this is not a joke. Got it?
KingofOldSchool
03-11-2004, 01:50 PM
And yet more...
credit: <font color=red>http://www.beatingthejoketodeath.com</font>
Hollywood Hulk Hogan has finallly retired from the wrestling biz to team up with the creaters of Hungry Hungry Hippos, to make the exciting new game...Hungry Hungry Hulk. Instead of hippos, the game will consist of 4 Hogan heads (70's Heel Hogan, 80's Hogan, 90's Face Hogan, and late 90's/early 00 Hollywood Hogan) and instead of marbles, the 4 Hogan heads will try to eat World Title's, PPV Main Events, and Steroids.
haha you look stupid now he has deleted his post.
Savio
03-11-2004, 02:02 PM
A-train Gets fired
www.waititsstillalive.com
Before a meeting yesterday vince heard something in the broom closet. Then a scream. He open the door and was terrified. Bear bear! he shouted as spike dudley was being aten by A-train. A-Train ran out of the building and climbed a near by tree Fire men tried to coax him and get him down but he batted them away. HHH had an idea
"A-train we have a match up next"
A-train lied on the ground and HHH pinned him he was then tranqed and carried off to the Vet.
I thought that last one was aweful, Savior. :|
BasicThuganomics
03-11-2004, 02:16 PM
Ok, I'm really confused? How much of this thread was a joke? Is Austin actually quitting? :-\
Savio
03-11-2004, 02:21 PM
Yeah austin is quitting and HHH iIs gonna win at wrestle mania for the 3rd time in a row......oh wait
Splaya
03-11-2004, 02:25 PM
^Well it only took you 2 hours to ruin a thread. Must be a new record
Savio
03-11-2004, 02:27 PM
splaya stop trying.
^Well it only took you 2 hours to ruin a thread. Must be a new record
^ I must 100% agree with the above statement.
splaya stop trying.
Coming from someone who PMed me 'proof' that Eminem is wrestle_god. :|
And, this is not wrestling related, could you and Splaya keep your opinions off the Wrestling boards.
Rock Bottom
03-11-2004, 02:39 PM
Coming from someone who PMed me 'proof' that Eminem is wrestle_god. :|
And, this is not wrestling related, could you and Splaya keep your opinions off the Wrestling boards.
I concur with the one they call Dazz
Savio
03-11-2004, 02:44 PM
^ I must 100% agree with the above statement.
You're ruining it seeing as though you're arguing with me.
Rock Bottom
03-11-2004, 03:28 PM
Alright, joke is getting old so I'm going to get mine in while I still can without being flamed for it.
--------------------------
Credit: Dave Meltzer
Triple H has been reported to have had a conversation with Satan at his hotel in a conference. Apparently, Satan offered Triple H dictatorship of the world when Satan's son George W Bush had finally secured the ground. Triple H's negotiations were said to have went well, until Satan said, "I think you'll love your new *job*," and Hunter ripped up the contract and booked out the door, screaming, "NICE TRY CHRIS!"
Corkscrewed
03-11-2004, 05:58 PM
LMAO! This could have been archive worthy if Savior hadn't ruined it. :p
Heyman
03-11-2004, 06:07 PM
And yet more...
credit: <font color=red>http://www.beatingthejoketodeath.com</font>
Hollywood Hulk Hogan has finallly retired from the wrestling biz to team up with the creaters of Hungry Hungry Hippos, to make the exciting new game...Hungry Hungry Hulk. Instead of hippos, the game will consist of 4 Hogan heads (70's Heel Hogan, 80's Hogan, 90's Face Hogan, and late 90's/early 00 Hollywood Hogan) and instead of marbles, the 4 Hogan heads will try to eat World Title's, PPV Main Events, and Steroids.
:lol:
Joe Kerr
03-11-2004, 06:20 PM
Coming from someone who PMed me 'proof' that Eminem is wrestle_god. :|
And, this is not wrestling related, could you and Splaya keep your opinions off the Wrestling boards.
LOL jesus that boy is overly obsessed with me...is there anyone that he hasnt pmed about me???
ilt_undertaker
03-11-2004, 06:21 PM
<font color=Silver> :lol: @ the thread</font>
Sean O'Haire Quits WWE to Pursue a Career in the Circus
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Credit Wrestlingplanet.com
We have just been informed that Sean O"Haire has officially quit the WWE to pursue a career as a professional circus animal cage cleaner. Sean told management this morning that his appearence at Velocity this Saturday will be his last appearence in a WWE ring. Sean was quite emotional during this meeting as he thanked everyone for not giving him an opportunity and said jobbing will always have a place in his heart. Sean had been planning on a career after jobbing for quite some time now and since he loves to clean cages and is quite good at it, he wants to see if he has what it takes to turn pro. WWE Management thanked Sean O'Haire for everything he has given them throughout the years and wishes him best of luck in his future endeavors.
With all specualtion of Sean O'Haire leaving after Wrestlemania, one thinks it will be a given that no one will really be affected.
ilt_undertaker
03-11-2004, 06:31 PM
:lol: :'(
Champion of Europa
03-11-2004, 06:36 PM
Credit: Dave Meltzer
Sean O'Haire has reportedly given Vince McMahon his 2 weeks notice that he will soon leave the WWE because of many multi-million dollar job offers that have been sent to him. CNN, MSNBC, and CSPAN have both offered him million dollar contracts, as they, "Tell them something they didn't already know." Fox News has also offered him a contract, albeit for different reasons. They say, and I quote, "He has no sources and facts to back up what he says, and he only offers one side of the story. He'll fit right in."
Champion of Europa
03-11-2004, 06:37 PM
My bad, didn't see that Sean O'Haire already got done.
My bad, didn't see that Sean O'Haire already got done.
LOL
It took me forever to think of someone good to use in this thread, O'Haire is pretty good for shit like this so I can't blame you.
Loose Cannon
03-11-2004, 07:07 PM
I feel honored at what I have started here. LOL at everyone.
CANADIAN
03-11-2004, 08:09 PM
I hope it isnt true, then every one is leaving.
ColdwaVer
03-11-2004, 09:32 PM
Credit: <font color=red>I'mnoteevensureifit'sstillfunnyanymore.com</font>
In the most shocking abandonment yet, WWE Chairman Vincent Kennedy McMahon has announced that he is leaving WWE for good.
"I just realized that I've allowed a big-nosed, roided up goon to steal my daughter and ruin my company. I cannot even beg forgiveness for what I have done to my fans, but I will do the honorable thing."
Persuant to this statement, McMahon will officially declare WWE a nonentity, destroy all the title belts, and commit ritual suicide on live PPV television this Sunday immediately following WM20.
Savio
03-11-2004, 09:37 PM
I heard he was gonna give them all to HHH
LMAO
i love this forum, you guys are all awesome
credit: <font color=red>http://www.beatingthejoketodeath.com</font>
We have just been informed that Bubba Ray and D-Von, wrestling's famous Dudley Boys, have officially tendered their resignations to WWE. Their appearance at WM20 will be their last, according to their brother Spike. Official sources have confirmed that the Dudleyz plan to persue careers as professional furniture craftsman.
"We've been destroying tables for so many years," stated Bubba Ray, "and we now feel it's time to give something back to the furniture community."
Addittionally, we can exclusively reveal that Rob Van Dam, notoriously dissatisfied with his treatment by WWE management, will also be leaving the company immediately following WM20. His future plans are unknown, but word from his travel agent confirms that he has purchased plane tickets and passports to Jamaica, Colombia, Cuba, and Holland.
As-yet-unconfirmed reports have been stating that Chris Jericho plans on leaving both WWE and his band Fozzy, and after a quick marriage to Trish Stratus in Las Vegas, will be using his status as "King of the World" to attempt to negotiate peace in the Middle East.
At least one source is claiming that Mark Henry, Rikishi, and the Big Show have all quit WWE to become professional eaters. Several other sources claim that they did this years ago.
LOL
Corkscrewed
03-12-2004, 01:26 AM
Credit: I'mnoteevensureifit'sstillfunnyanymore.com
In a followup to a previous story, Vince McMahon later yelled out "FOOLED YA!" and announced that Triple H was now undesputed champion of every belt in the world. He also announced the WWE's purchase of NWA-TNA and was quick to promote the transformation of the X-Division into the new Cage Cleaning League.
Kane Knight
03-12-2004, 01:51 AM
:lol: This is horrible, but awesome.
KingofOldSchool
03-12-2004, 09:48 AM
Credit: <font color=red>I'mnoteevensureifit'sstillfunnyanymore.com</font>
In yet more WWE retirements, RAW commentator and former pro wrestler, Jerry "The King" Lawler has quit his duties on Raw after being offered his own chain of "Puppy" shops called "The King's Puppies." Lawler stated that he is thankful for all of the years he has had in the WWE and wishes he can work with them again sometime down the road, but this has always been a dream of his that he couldn't pass up.
*UPDATE* Jerry Lawler has reportedly asked for his job back on Raw after he found out that the puppy shop wasn't what he had originally thought.
Sephiroth
03-12-2004, 09:57 AM
I heard Triple HHH is leaving...but then i woke up and it was all a dream.
Evil Vito
03-12-2004, 09:44 PM
<font color=goldenrod>Christian to leave WWE
---------------------------------------------------------
Credit: Wrestlingplanet.com
In some shocking news, Christian has announced that he will be leaving the WWE soon. He has stated that he has found a new religion, Judaism. He feels that with the rough WWE scehdules, he will not have enough time to fully appreciate the religion.
It is rumored that to cover up for it, Christian's last match in the WWE will be against Goldberg in a "Loser Converts" match. After his loss, it is expected that Christian will be circumcised in the middle of the ring.
Rumors are also flying around that the WWE have plans sometime down the road for Christian to return, only with a more Jewish name, and it is speculated that he would be teamed with Goldberg as "The Dynamic Juo".</font>
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