Official RAW Thread for May 11, 2009: RAWWWW CHAAAAT Edition

[Xero]

Yo.

[Londoner]

Bit late eh?

[Londoner]

fired up for this anyhow.

[ClockShot]

Here's hoping for a better episode that last week.

[Londoner]

Here's hoping for a better episode that last week.

shouldn't be too hard to do.

[ClockShot]

ORTON!

[RatedGSuperstar]

I HEAR VOICES~!

Priceless dressed to fight...match coming after this?

[RatedGSuperstar]

I wonder how Shane's pinky toe is doing after getting it grazed by those steps last week.

[HeartBreakMan2k]

I :love: Randy

[ClockShot]

*yawn*

I hope this no touch rule ends right now.

[Londoner]

Oh noez randy, batista wont win :(

[RatedGSuperstar]

LMAO @ the "DAVE SMASH" sign in the crowd.

[Londoner]

LMAO @ the "DAVE SMASH" sign in the crowd.

:lol:

[ClockShot]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[RatedGSuperstar]

Aah, the old "I'm scared of you, so please come to my side so I don't have to fight you" routine.

[ClockShot]

Fucking lame.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Batista just needs to stop cutting promos and stand around looking like this all the time:

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y268/Karmasunn/batista1.jpg

It'd be better than him constantly botching his promos.

[Londoner]

excuse me is back it seems,ugh

[ClockShot]

EXCUSE ME!

[RatedGSuperstar]

Actually, Vickie, waiving the no contact ruling is pretty predictable. You'd be better off just keeping them apart for a change.

[Londoner]

blah

[ClockShot]

Off to a lousy start yet again.

[Londoner]

When is HBK returning?

[James Steele]

NEXT!

[RatedGSuperstar]

So our options are seeing the same thing we've been seeing for three weeks or blowing our load for the upcoming PPV's main event early?

Not like it matters, anyway, since everyone knows there's not going to be a real finish to that match. :shifty:

[James Steele]

LOL

Haven't I seen this match before?

[James Steele]

I am ready for Miz/Cena III

[mike adamle]

Cody Rhodes needs knee pads.

[Londoner]

At first i thought smackdown got screwed, but damn, raws roster really does suck.

[James Steele]

Cody Rhodes needs knee pads.

He does look awkward without them.

[James Steele]

I think Michael Cole might be Kane Knight. Notice how he breaks down line-for-line everybody's promos, and even mentions things they said that they didn't say.

[Londoner]

wtf@ that finish LOL

[ClockShot]

I walk away for a minute and the match is over. Please.

[Londoner]

'bring a chair in'=DQ OMGZ

[RatedGSuperstar]

Way to make Batista look like an idiot for two weeks in a row. DAVE MAD. DAVE SMASH.

[James Steele]

Somebody is getting their ankle fucked up toniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!

[ClockShot]

So wait. We get this same match twice in one night. Except throw Orton into the mix later on.

Wow. They must have hit one hell of a writer's block in back.

[James Steele]

I bet it will be Linda McMahon.

[James Steele]

Mike Knox will join The Legacy.

[ClockShot]

Kinda hard to do when he's on Smackdown.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Toasty Torpedo Takedown? Is WWE that broke?

[James Steele]

KNOX CARES ABOUT NO BRAND HE ONLY CARED ABOUT KNOX.

[Triple Naitch]

Maryse :love: I hear she's hot.

[Londoner]

bloody divas next...way to follow up shit with more shit

[James Steele]

ROFL


EPIC SILENCE

[Londoner]

mickie!

[Triple Naitch]

That is such a stupid hat.

[Krimzon7]

If you aren't Maryse you want to be IN HER.


Unless you'r'e in Mickie...

[James Steele]

Is Kelly Kelly 21 yet?

[ClockShot]

Is this a repeat of last week?

[James Steele]

Is it just me or does everybody seem unbalanced and kind of stumbly tonight?

[Londoner]

mickie >maryse

[RatedGSuperstar]

Is Kelly Kelly 21 yet?

Turned 22 in January, sez Wiki.

[James Steele]

Watch the guy in the pink shirt in the front row in the hard shot. LOL

[James Steele]

Turned 22 in January, sez Wiki.

Did it say anything about the picture of her pissing in a sink?

[RatedGSuperstar]

Cole keeps talking about someone named Maurice during this match. Is that his gay lover?

[James Steele]

Mickie James vs Trish Stratus at WrestleMania 22 was great stuff.

[Londoner]

Watch the guy in the pink shirt in the front row in the hard shot. LOL

is that the guy that seems to be at loads of wwe events in the front row?

[Hornicane]

Cole keeps talking about someone named Maurice during this match. Is that his gay lover?

Some people call me Maurice. :shifty:

[James Steele]

MICKIE JAMES HAS DONE THE IMPOSSIBLE! SHE HAS BEATEN MARYSE TWO WEEKS IN A ROW!

[Triple Naitch]

:wave: Hi, Maurice.

[James Steele]

EPIC ORTON FACE

[Londoner]

ORTON AGAIN? bloody hell

[HeartBreakMan2k]

Maryse plays her character so well.

[James Steele]

EPIC ORTON DRAMA

[James Steele]

EPIC ORTON FADE TO BLACK

[RatedGSuperstar]

Someone kidnapped CAWdy?

[ClockShot]

What was after the women's match last week?

[RatedGSuperstar]

What was after the women's match last week?

Either Matt/Coffee or The Miz's promo...I forget.

[Londoner]

i'm guessing matt wrestles under protest v goldust again next

[ClockShot]

I'm calling bullshit on that stat.

[James Steele]

:lol:

I wonder how long WWE will be able to be sponsored by both Subway and Quiznos.

[James Steele]

:lol:

LINDA MCMAHON KIDNAPPED CODY RHODES!

[Krimzon7]

Kiss Ass

[James Steele]

Vickie and Chavo have a really awkward chemistry.

[James Steele]

No reaction for The Miz's name.

[Londoner]

cena/miz :lol:

[Hornicane]

Miz. :heart:

[James Steele]

Michael Cole hype-machine initiate.

[Londoner]

eh whats this now

[James Steele]

Did their headsets break?

[Hornicane]

The fuck is this?

[The Chris Rosa]

*Spoiler*

Cena wins.

*Spoiler*

[ClockShot]

What? Reading the card from the table is underrated now?

WHO'S WRITING THE SCRIPT?!

[James Steele]

:lol:

All the adults in the crowd are like...is this for real?

This is a pretty good looking card.

[Londoner]

yeah cole...and?

[James Steele]

Linda McMahon's Sex Dungeon...LIVE TONIGHT!

[ClockShot]

This it awful.

[Londoner]

dibiase is down!oh noez :(

[Krimzon7]

Paul Blart...classic.

[James Steele]

So, Ted didn't know Cody was in the shower so Randy goes looking for Cody and then they find out Ted was assaulted.

I think I read a short story like this once...so when do they start giving backrubs?

[Londoner]

RAW NEEDS KENNEDYYYYY

[James Steele]

:lol:

MISTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR INJURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY PROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!

[Hornicane]

Hate Kennedy's "new" music. :mad:

[ClockShot]

Really. Mr Kennedy is coming back? Wow.

:roll:

[James Steele]

cArLiTo OmG

[Krimzon7]

Who's this new guy? What's the deal with him screaming his name???

[James Steele]

I want that jacket TBK has.

[Krimzon7]

And more gayer than ever.....
Sweetums!

[Londoner]

didn't this happen last week????

[The Chris Rosa]

Jesus, let Kendrick win...

[KIRA]

TBK

[Krimzon7]

I want that jacket TBK has.
TBK was playing Dress up in HHH's closet.

[mike adamle]

TBK is great.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Time for TBK's weekly squashing. Let's see how many times Cole can call him "impressive" this week before he gets pinned.

[Indifferent Clox]

BATISTA IS GOING TO MURDER ORTON WITH A KNIFE ON JUDGEMENT DAY IT IS THE ONLY WAY TO REDEEM FOR HIS SINSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

[James Steele]

The Brian Kendrick is a former WWE Champion. He was champion for 3 minutes at the Scramble match at Unforgiven!

[The Chris Rosa]

Twice actually.

[James Steele]

I am seriously waiting for the Linda McMahon angle coming. They have been through all of the McMahons except Linda and she always shows up when shit gets crazy.

HOLY SHIT! TBK WINS!

[The Chris Rosa]

YESSS!!! Vindication!

[ClockShot]

Oh my.

[Londoner]

oooh, he won

[KIRA]

SWEET JESUS HE DID IT!

[James Steele]

HOLY SHIT! THE BRIAN KENDRICK HAS DIRECTION!

[KIRA]

and promo time!

[James Steele]

CHAMPIONSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[ClockShot]

So. Should we open up the windows and take bets on the partner?

[James Steele]

Linda McMahon kidnapping and raping The Legacy in a dungeon with Kane would be a license to print money for WWE.

[The Chris Rosa]

Clean pin too.

[Krimzon7]

enter THE Miz...

[ClockShot]

These Snickers commercials are weird.

[James Steele]

So. Should we open up the windows and take bets on the partner?

$3.75 on it being.....
































http://www.superluchas.net/wp-content/uploads/wildcat-chris-harris.jpg
BRADEN WALKER

[RatedGSuperstar]

Who's on the Raw roster right now that Kendrick could possibly team with? Not many heels with nothing to do, unless they stick Miz or Hardy in another tag team.

TBK and Festus would be a pretty funny tag team now that I think about it, though, even if Festus isn't a heel.

[James Steele]

What is up with Batista having that supid smile in all of his promo shots?

[The Chris Rosa]

Kennedy?

[Londoner]

lmfao big show

[Hornicane]

Kennedy?

I could see it.

[KIRA]

Hmm Triple h is Dave's partner after a miraculous speedy recovery

[James Steele]

Big Show has a streak of his own. WINLESS AT WRESTLEMANIA

[James Steele]

LINDA MCMAHON WILL SHOW UP TONIGHT!

[James Steele]

John Cena really needs to learn how to sell.

[The Chris Rosa]

This could potentially could be the greatest RAW ever...

[RatedGSuperstar]

MIZ 2 CENA 0 armbands > Jeff Hardy armbands.

And sweet Jesus I love Miz's theme.

[James Steele]

I refuse to like The Miz, but he has been making it harder lately.

[James Steele]

HAHAHAHAHA

[ClockShot]

12 ROUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Londoner]

'its not 12 rounds,ppl are gonna see this':D

[KIRA]

BURN....AGAIN!

[James Steele]

ZING

ZING

ZING

[RatedGSuperstar]

LMAO..."It's not 12 Rounds, people are actually gonna see this, Cena..."

[James Steele]

IT'S BURYING TIME!

[Hornicane]

Miz = :love:

[James Steele]

Did Cena just fist Miz in the ass?

[James Steele]

YOU CAN'T WRESTLE!

YOU CAN'T WRESTLE!

[RatedGSuperstar]

Calling it now...Miz b. Cena by count out.

[KIRA]

If they let miz have this match I'll squeal like a prepubescent female fan geting to meet john cena

[James Steele]

Lawler is such an annoying twat as a Cena-mark.

[Londoner]

hahahahahaha

[James Steele]

MIZERY

[ClockShot]

EXCUSE ME!?

What........wait. Never mind.

[RatedGSuperstar]

The Miz stole Alex Shelley's ridiculous haircut.

[James Steele]

Cody is right!

[James Steele]

Cody is about to get creamed by Dave, and just so Randy can sit back and watch.

[KIRA]

I love how cody looks like hes being fed to the wolves

[RatedGSuperstar]

Part of me thinks it's DX attacking Legacy members, not Batista. HHH and HBK against Legacy after Judgment Day, ending with HHH/Orton again at SummerSlam.

[KIRA]

The Miz stole Alex Shelley's heterosexuality.

[James Steele]

I'd mark out.

[Londoner]

Part of me thinks it's DX attacking Legacy members, not Batista. HHH and HBK against Legacy after Judgment Day, ending with HHH/Orton again at SummerSlam.

interesting thought.

[RatedGSuperstar]

interesting thought.

Probably wouldn't be thinking it if King and Cole didn't throw in the fact that it looked like DiBiase was attacked two on one.

[James Steele]

Linda McMahon is involved.

[Londoner]

Probably wouldn't be thinking it if King and Cole didn't throw in the fact that it looked like DiBiase was attacked two on one.

I missed that bit...

[Londoner]

santina lol

[James Steele]

HLA
HLA
HLA
HLA
HLA
HLA

[KIRA]

Probably wouldn't be thinking it if King and Cole didn't throw in the fact that it looked like DiBiase was attacked two on one.


Michael Cole and The King WWEs own CSI

[ClockShot]

I've had enough of this.

[James Steele]

Cody's pipe is huge.

[Londoner]

there goes the dx theory

[James Steele]

Hornswoggle escaped Linda's sex dungeon, but Cody won't be so lucky. Linda is thankful for Dave. He shall be spared.

[ClockShot]

Creepy.

[KIRA]

RAPE

[RatedGSuperstar]

Uh oh, Big Dave wants to play slumber party games in the closet.

[Theo Dious]

DYKING IT OUT ON A PG13 BROADCAST!!!11

[ClockShot]

Haven't heard that PSA in a while.

[KIRA]

time to play 7 mins in heaven with Batista and Cawdy

[RatedGSuperstar]

I don't know how Rosa managed to squeeze into those pants, but I wouldn't mind trying to get them off. :naughty:

[Hanso Amore]

LOL @ the Italian flavor in the Santina Theme!

[Hornicane]

Have they always had the Italian guitar in Billy and Chuck's theme for Santina? Because :rofl:

[Hanso Amore]

Jesus, Beth Gorilla Pressing Santino!

[Droford]

Dumb Question:

If Santino really wanted to go all out for this gimmick and he went and got breast implants, would it be considered indecent to show them uncovered? JBL's man boobs say hello as well as a reminder.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Have they always had the Italian guitar in Billy and Chuck's theme for Santina? Because :rofl:

Doesn't look like it...the original had more of a "Too Much" feel to it:

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[KIRA]

hows that wig staying on

[Indifferent Clox]

who is this new diva hottie? rawr

[James Steele]

Linda McMahon is coming to RAW!

[Londoner]

shit main event next? or matt hardy?

[KIRA]

Correct me if I'm wrong but isnt Batista taking out legacy more of a heel move?

[RatedGSuperstar]

I'm betting we get another Orton promo and a re-match of Matt/Coffee to kill time until the main event.

[Londoner]

Gotta say, i think a kennedy v Matt hardy feud would be good.

[KIRA]

Actually I wanna see how orton does take this

[KIRA]

Cena looks like he got his favorite toy stolen

[James Steele]

JOHN CENA HAS WINED AND DINED WITH KINGS AND QUEENS, AND JOHN CENA HAS SLEPT IN ALLEYS AND DINED ON PORK-N-BEANS!

[Theo Dious]

Wow, now Cena's physical state is a metaphor for the economy.

[James Steele]

God, Cena forces these promos more than a huge turd.

[Londoner]

MVP

[Theo Dious]

M

[Hornicane]

"To face the Bitch..." :rofl:

[Theo Dious]

V

[Theo Dious]

P

[KIRA]

BALLIN!

[Londoner]

VIP LOUNGE!

[ClockShot]

J.A. Adande Lounge > V.I.P. Lounge.

[ClockShot]

THE KING!

[James Steele]

Regal!

[KIRA]

Regal.......this can only be gold

[Londoner]

well said mvp lol

[RatedGSuperstar]

What happens if Regal wins the U.S. Title? Does he "bring back" the European Title in name?

[Theo Dious]

Ok, Heel Matt is getting cheered too much.

[Londoner]

fatal four way for the US title PLEASE

[James Steele]

RACIAL WARFARE

[Theo Dious]

fatal four way for the US title PLEASE

Yeah cause we shouldn't save that for a PPV or anything.

[James Steele]

What happens if Regal wins the U.S. Title? Does he "bring back" the European Title in name?

That would be amazing if he brought back the belt and everything.

[Londoner]

Yeah cause we shouldn't save that for a PPV or anything.

Sorry, that's what i meant. was a future request sort of thing.

[RatedGSuperstar]

A bit too late to add a four way for Judgment Day, but it wouldn't be a bad match for Extreme Rules/GAB.

[Hornicane]

LOL @ Matt wrestling in his socks

[Londoner]

are those really his socks?

[James Steele]

I am going to mark so hard when Linda McMahon shows up tonight.

[James Steele]

It looks like Matt is missing one shoe.

[KIRA]

I am going tosleep so hard when Linda McMahon shows up tonight.

[Theo Dious]

I am going to jack off so hard when Linda McMahon shows up tonight.

Look, my odd sexual arousals shame me as much as they disgust you.

[Theo Dious]

PEEP SHOW!!!

[James Steele]

:lol:

I kinda would like to see Batista and Linda turn heel by starting a relationship. You have Legacy/Vicky vs HHH/Vince/Steph vs Batista/Linda in a three way power struggle on RAW.

[RatedGSuperstar]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/funny-pictures-peep-show-easter-candy.jpg

[owenbrown]

J.A. Adande Lounge > V.I.P. Lounge.

lol @ random Around The Horn reference but that statement is false :lol:

[KIRA]

dont say relationship it druges up disturbing images I'd rather not have in my head

[James Steele]

Why do they keep that fucking belt. Seriously, bring back the 02-05 design or make a new WWE Title design.

[ClockShot]

It was the first thing I thought of when I saw the furniture in the ring.

[Londoner]

Why do they keep that fucking belt. Seriously, bring back the 02-05 design or make a new WWE Title design.

:y:

[James Steele]

Batista is going to do the following to Randy Orton:

--> Lock he in the camel fucking clutch he sack of shit mother fucker
--> Fuck he ass son of a bitch mother fucker
--> Break he back mother fucker shit
--> Make he fucking humble son of a bitch

[KIRA]

Everything Cena touches turns to crap title belts, Movies ect.

[owenbrown]

I hate to say it but I think Bats code is gonna work and he is winning the title on Sunday :'(

[James Steele]

COME ON LINDA! COME ON LINDA!

[Londoner]

hmmmm lol

[RatedGSuperstar]

LOL, the crowd is booing Batista.

[Londoner]

batista kicks the steps:D

[James Steele]

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[ClockShot]

I expected CAWdy and Ted to break loose by now.

[KIRA]

He mustve put the code in twice for this kinda power

[James Steele]

Cody and Ted escaped the Sex Dungeon, LINDA IS ON THE WAY!

[Londoner]

ortons ok now?

[James Steele]

FUCK, That was a beautiful spear.

[RatedGSuperstar]

Man, fuck Raw. SmackDown's where it's at now.

Batista's looking less mobile than Scott Steiner tonight.

[Londoner]

Man, fuck Raw. SmackDown's where it's at now.

Totally.

[ClockShot]

Wow they end early tonight.

2 weeks in a row Raw has sucked.

[James Steele]

RAW went by really fast tonight.

[dronepool]

Yeah, it felt quick today. Before I realized it was already 10 something :-\

[Dorkchop]

Boring Raw aside from MVP, Regal, Kofi, and Matt. Those guys are pretty much the only thing holding my attention on Raw since the draft. I wish Smackdown didn't have such a crappy time slot. I wish it still aired on Thursdays.

[Jon Kano]

Was skimming SKY and noticed RAW was one, decided to give it a go....

Caught like the last minute of the Santino skit in the ring, and OMG, even when they cut to King and Cole, you can see the desperation in their faces, being forced, to try and make viewers laugh at that kind of shit. King was probably asking Cole to slit his throat, Cole would've done it to himself.

The look in theif faces, the forced smile, the instances where they didn't know what to say or carry on from the other, its a sad picture.

This is why I don't watch.

WWE needs its R rating/old watershed back. Less people. A unfied brand once again.

[Theo Dious]

WWE needs its R rating/old watershed back. Less people. A unifed brand once again.

Yes, we know you are a moron. Stop reminding us.

[Jon Kano]

Old rating - You'll get the hardcore title and matches back, more risque material, more dangerous spots, more violence in the matches.

Less people - more focus on talent, matches and less of this soap opera shit.

Unified brand - just give the whole company a 'federation feel' and allow storylines to develop sooner and keep things going at a continuous pace rather than having one hour a week for a whole brand to be showcased.

I know they are not exactly the best thought out ideas, but they are ideas, and I have no idea why you suggest I am a moron, I have watched and loved wrestling long enough to have and form an opinion.

I doubt you know a wrist lock from a wristwatch.

[Lock Jaw]

Less people - more focus on talent, matches and less of this soap opera shit.


I'd say there's actually more wrestling nowadays than there was in the Attitude era, and that the Attitude era had more "soap opera shit" than today.

[Jon Kano]

I'd say there's actually more wrestling nowadays than there was in the Attitude era, and that the Attitude era had more "soap opera shit" than today.

I dunno, do you say that because back then the shows were part of one brand? and now it seems separated and less of? or do you actually think thats the case?

You could be right, I guess I should've illustrated the idea of quality, rather than quantity.

I get that its entertainment, and corny, tounge in cheek, whatever you want to call it is always going to be part of wrestling, but I dunno, its just seeing that Santino/a thing, its just embaressing to watch. But then I was also a different age back then and how to perceive the product then is different.

Its just my opnion that if the watershed was back to what it was, all aspects of the product; wrestling, matches, spots, violence, quality, characters etc would all improve.

I mean to call ECW ECW is pretty much false advertising.