King of the Action! Round 1 - HEEEYAAAAAA

[thedamndest]

It's time for the summer blockbuster, and what better way to kick things off than with a poll to find out who is the undisputed king of action? In the next few weeks, we will see explosions, death rays, aliens, robots, ninjas, gadgets, sexy women, guns, ammo, reloading, blood, sharks, witty remarks, in what is sure to be the ultimate cock measuring contest. So let's find out just who is the real King of Action!

Here are the rules:

To keep things easy and action packed, we are doing things in poll format. That means vote one time between 1a and 1b or else your vote will be negated and Steven Seagal will come snap your neck (yeah, it's true. He's pretty hard up for cash these days).

There are 32 action heroes divided into 4 brackets. We tried to give each bracket an even mix of "types" of heroes meaning era, women, superhero. We will randomize the bracket after each round, but the brackets will not face off until the final four.

We tried to be as accommodating as possible. We're (not) sorry that (insert hero) didn't make the cut.

This has been presented by thedamndest, Jeritron, and Jostens. Go Jostens!

[thedamndest]

Here is what the actual bracket looks like so you can start filling yours out at home:

Robocop
Ellen Ripley (Alien)
Dutch (Predator)
Ethan Hunt (Mission Impossible)
Riggs (Lethal Weapon)
Batman (Bale)
John McClain
Leon (The Professional)

Indiana Jones
The Transporter
Blade
Marv (Sin City)
The Bride (Kill Bill)
James Bond (Connery)
Blondie (The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly series)
Neo (The Matrix)

Rambo
Iron Man
Casey Rybek (Under Siege)
Han Solo (Star Wars)
Ash (Evil Dead)
Maximus Decimus Meridius (Gladiator)
Sarah Conner (Terminator)
Lee (Enter the Dragon)

Jason Bourne (Bourne series)
Snake Plissken (Escape from LA, New York)
Alice (Resident Evil)
El (Desperado)
Wolverine
Axel Foley (Beverly Hills Cop)
Quint (Jaws)
Terminator

[Jeritron]

Some tough choices there. I didn't always pick what movie I liked better, or even what character I liked better.
I voted strictly on how "badass" they are

[thedamndest]

I tried to do that as well. I used the "who would win in a fight/who has a better power" question for some of them.

[Jeritron]

I also brought into my decison how iconic one is compared to the other, or how interesting and original of a character are they at times.

For instance, I went with Ripley over Robocop. It wasn't simply because I prefer the first two Alien movies to Robocop, or that I think she'd win in a fight.
I just think her character defines the female action hero and has a much bigger legacy in movies.

[Nowhere Man]

Going on which character was more enjoyable over 'who would win a fight', my votes went to:

Robocop (but I regretted that almost immediately after submitting)
Dutch
Batman
John McClain

Indiana Jones
Marv
James Bond
Blondie

Rambo
Han Solo
Ash
Lee

Jason Bourne
El
Wolverine
Terminator

[Hornicane]

The Bride v. Bond was the toughest decision for me in that one. :-\

[CSL]

Fuck you all for putting John McClane against Leon.

And fuck you all x1000 for even entertaining the notion of voting Christian Bale and his suit over Martin fucking Riggs, let alone actually doing it. Riggs would kill him with his thumbs

[Supreme Olajuwon]

Gave Quint a sympathy vote. That guy just has the worst luck.

[thedamndest]

I kind of regret putting Robocop over Ripley also, Nowhere Man, for a lot of the reasons Jerry said. I think it would come down to terrain. If they are on a space station Ripley would take it. If they are in Detroit it goes to Robocop.

[Jeritron]

For my money Quint gets the toughest break here. He deserves to go further, and he's one of my favorite movie characters. He's a badass shark hunter. I actually prefer him to The Terminator as a character, and probably prefer Jaws to T2 by a small margin.

Still, I have to give Terminator my vote because we're talking King of the Action here

[thedamndest]

Fuck you all for putting John McClane against Leon.

And fuck you all x1000 for even entertaining the notion of voting Christian Bale and his suit over Martin fucking Riggs, let alone actually doing it. Riggs would kill him with his thumbs

I saw Lethal Weapon 4. He's getting too old for this shit.

[Jeritron]

If Ripley loses, she gets the toughest break though. I think that'd be the biggest upset since I personally feel she deserves to go deep into the contest.

Robocop is fantastic, but it's just not on the level of Ripley as an action character. Few are.

[Jeritron]

The question is, would Quint find a way to kill the Terminator if he had fair warning? I can't imagine the Terminator would be able to stay up with 3 barrels on him...

[thedamndest]

Side question: if John McClane and Martin Riggs switched places, would they both survive their respective action movies? McClane would definitely survive Lethal Weapon, but I am not so sure about Riggs surviving all of the Die Hards. He seems to need Roger to keep him sane/alive. In the first Die Hard he might end up foiling Hans Gruber, but I think he would kill himself afterwards.

[Supreme Olajuwon]

A little perturbed Captain Steven Hiller didn't make the cut but this is a solid list.

[Jeritron]

Riggs would not survive. Just no way.

[Jeritron]

A little perturbed Captain Steven Hiller didn't make the cut but this is a solid list.

It crossed my mind. We definitely discussed if Will Smith deserved a berth, and who he would be in as.

I feel like he doesn't make the cut though. He's a pilot, and aside from that he doesn't engage in any action aside from one punch. There isn't any Top Gun on here. I think the pilot route isn't entirely fair.
Han Solo's on here, and he's a pilot, but he also gets his hands dirty going on adventures and shooting stormtroopers.
I wouldn't put Maverick from Top Gun.

I feel like Hiller's a respectable mention, but doesn't make the cut if some of the characters we cut out didn't.

[Supreme Olajuwon]

No biggie. El Mariachi and Blondie made it in so I'm happy.

[Jeritron]

Ian Malcom, though not a true action hero, holds a special role in the competition. He is present at all times to ponder the dynamics of the matchups, and their consequences on the surrounding world.
He is here to analyze, critique, and pick apart the chaos that is King of the Action!

http://roddysrockinreviews.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/ian-malcolm1.jpg

[Jeritron]

But if anyone crosses him he will hold his own...

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_bkFIPLIOGL8/RvHPqMmX0JI/AAAAAAAADSo/CS3r4Dnq5Tc/s400/ianMalcolm_2901.jpg

[DaveBrawl]

Robocop
Dutch (Predator)
Batman (Christian Bale)
John McClain (Die Hard)

Transporter - meant to vote Indy but apparently clicked the wrong box, not that it matters
Marv (Sin City)
James Bond (Connery)
Blondie (The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly series)

Iron Man - toughest one for me
Casey Rybek (Under Siege)
Maximus Decimus Meridius (Gladiator)
Lee (Enter the Dragon)

Snake Plissken (Escape from LA, New York)
El (Desperado)
Axel Foley (Beverly Hills Cop)
Terminator

[Requiem]

I am pretty sure Jason Bourne could take out all of these guys.

[Evil Vito]

The Bride v. Bond was the toughest decision for me in that one. :-\

<font color=goldenrod>Ditto...I ultimately went with The Bride, I LOVED the Kill Bill series and she took on the entire fucking Crazy 88's gang by herself. Plus, I figured Bond would win anyway...and I'll likely be voting for him in subsequent rounds.</font>

[RP]

Robocop


Ethan Hunt (Mission Impossible)
Riggs (Lethal Weapon)

John McClain


Indiana Jones

Blade


James Bond (Connery)

Neo (The Matrix)

Rambo


Han Solo (Star Wars)
Ash (Evil Dead)

Sarah Conner (Terminator)



Snake Plissken (Escape from LA, New York)
Alice (Resident Evil)

Wolverine


Terminator

[mitchables]

That poll method is genius. That's how we should do King of the Forum in future and save everyone a butt-load of pain.

[mitchables]

Although... and despite the fact I love Batman more than pretty much any character in the history of everything, he and Wolverine are not strictly action movie characters. Mutants and uber-rich vigilantes shouldn't be allowed to enter. It's just not fair. John McClane was just a cop in the wrong place at the wrong time, and yet he cleared out a building of terrorists. That's what makes him bad-ass. Wolverine is bad-ass too, for completely different reasons. But ultimately, you put them in a room together, and I can tell you who will be standing at the end of the fight.

[Jeritron]

Well it's not like everyone has to be of equal power and circumstance because that would be ridiculous.
The "who would win in a fight" premise is just one approach, rather than the actual purpose of the competition.

Mainly I would say it's heroes from popular action movies/franchises, and people vote for which one they think is better.

[mitchables]

Yeah well I'm obviously not basing my choices solely on who would win in a fight, since for a lot of them, it's all context.

[thedamndest]

That led me to a few befuddling decisions. I never thought I would pick Neo over Blondie for anything, but the guy can stop bullets. I really don't see how Blondie is going to beat that.

[Jeritron]

Who said this was plugged into the Matrix? All Blondie has to do is have The Ugly pull the cord out from the back of his head, and he's long gone.

[thedamndest]

Neo has the ability to stop things IRL due to some shitty sequels. It would be unfair to allow The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly and not the entire Matrix trilogy, even if it does give Neo the ability to bedazzle a jacket without the use of a bedazzler.

[Jeritron]

Oh yea I forgot about the events of that god awful movie

[thedamndest]

I should have taken into account the sequels sucking so bad negating Neo's claims to the King of the Action throne.

[mitchables]

Yeah because let's face it, the man can stop bullets.

But he seems to have a problem fighting machines.

Eh? Eh?

[mitchables]

I'm talking about the Terminator, you faggots.

[Droford]

I cant believe you put The Transporter up against Indy..fuck.

[mitchables]

Might I remind you that Indy survived the nuking of the fridge?

It does not really get more bad-ass than that.

What did The Transporter ever do? Nothing for nobody.

[thedamndest]

Anyone of these guys could jump in a fridge and survive a nuclear blast. Maybe not Robocop. He's kind of slow and he might not fit...

[mitchables]

Yeah, sure, they could do it. But would they have the wherewithal and smarts to have thought of it in a pinch?

[KYR]

It was also very conveniently 'lead-lined'. Only INDY would have had the wherewhithal to think that THIS fridge had that.

[thedamndest]

Probably not Maximus due to nukes and fridges having not been invented in his time period.

[Jeritron]

Many of the conventions of these characters worlds would confuse and frighten him

[mitchables]

Yes, but he would react by just wildly stabbing and cutting at whatever confused and frightened him, which is not the worst strategy I've seen.

[thedamndest]

I see that ct2k chose to be a funny guy and vote for every contender. I will give you the benefit of the doubt, ct2k, and assume that is because you love Action so much that you couldn't possibly choose between one Action Superstar. Be advised that I have text messaged Steven Seagal about this. I'd start wearing a neck guard.

[DaveBrawl]

And by looking at his battle results with Han Solo he isn't gonna be happy.

[KYR]

I am also hugely disappointed with the omission of Jack Burton from this poll. :nono:

[thedamndest]

We considered Jack Burton. We opted for Snake instead. We felt that Snake plays a more "active ass-kicker" role, while Jack just kind of stands around and let other people do all the work for him, which is bad ass in its own way, but not really King of the Action material.