TPWW Forums - Favorite Simpsons Quote for a positive Rep

Quote:

Originally Posted by Astley316

I bent my wookie

I have an "I bent my wookie" t-shirt. :y:

From previous threads:

Quote:

Originally Posted by loopydate

APU: Ahhhhh, the searing hot kiss of lead. How I missed you. (beat) I mean...I think I'm dying.

MILHOUSE: I was watching. I saw the whole thing. First it started falling over. Then it fell over.

HOMER: That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things, too.

The entire "McDonald's" conversation. Won't reprint the entire thing here.

SQUEAKY-VOICED TEEN: Here's your taco, Mister. Whoops. It fell in the fryer. I'll get it out. Ow! Ow! Ow-w-w! Ow-w-w!

Quote:

Originally Posted by loopydate

Bart: Milhouse! You were supposed to be the night watchman!
Milhouse: I was watching. First it started falling over, then it fell over.

Homer: I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!

Lou: I went to the McDonalds over in Shelbyville the other day.
Chief Wiggum: The Mc-what?
Lou: Yeah, I never heard of it either but they say they have over 2000 locations in this state alone.
Eddie: Hmm...Must've sprung up over night.
Lou: But you know, its the little differences.
Chief Wiggum: Example?
Lou: Well at a McDonalds you can get a Krusty Burger with cheese. But they don't call it a Krusty Burger with cheese.
Chief Wiggum: Get out! What do they call it?
Lou: A quarter pounder with cheese.
Chief Wiggum: Quarter pounder with cheese...well I can see the cheese but? Hey, do they have Krusty's Partially Gelatinated Gum-Based beverages?
Lou: Yeah, they call them 'shakes.'
Eddie: *Pfft* 'Shakes.' You don't know what you're gettin'.

Amish Farmer: 'Tis a fine barn, but sure 'tis no pool, English.
Homer: D'oh-eth!

Kang: Holy fleurking schnit!

Kent Brockman: ...and the fluffy kitten played with that ball of string all through the night. On a lighter note, a Kwik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered last night.

Barney: I'm Barney Gumble, and I'm and alcoholic.
Lisa: Mr Gumble, this is a girl scout meeting.
Barney: Is it? Or is it that you girls can't admit that you have a problem!

Homer: Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.
Bart: What about Abraham Lincoln?
Homer: Uh, he sold poison milk to school children.

Chief Wiggum: What IS your fascination with my forbidden closet of mysteries?

Dr. Nick: [singing] The kneebone's connected to the... something. The something's connected to the... red thing. The red thing's connected to my wrist watch. ...Uh oh.

Alien: I bring you love!
Larry: It's bringing love, don't let it get away!
Carl: Break its legs!

Apu: Silly customer, you cannot hurt a Twinkie!

Willy: There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman!

Apu: There it is, the world's first convenience store.
Homer: This isn't very convenient.
Apu: Must you knock on everything we do?

Homer: Oh, yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?

Quote:

Originally Posted by loopydate

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No!
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal!
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

Homer: But every time I learn something new, it pushes out something old! Remember that time I took a home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?
Marge: That's because you were drunk!
Homer: And how!

[A rock flies through Mr. Burns' office window]
Mr. Burns: Look Smithers, a bird has become petrified and lost its sense of direction.

Bart: Oh my God! The dead have risen and are voting Republican!

Kang: We must move forward... not backwards, not to the side, not forwards, but always whirling, whirling, whirling towards freedom!

Maude Flanders: They were having S-E-X in front of C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N!
Krusty the Clown: Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down!

Barney: [during his acceptance speech] I've learned that I have a gift to share with the world. From now on, I'll be a new Barnard Gumbel; Clean, sober, and hardworking.
Mayor Quimby: Congratulations, Barney, and enjoy your prize - a lifetime supply of Duff Beer.
Barney: Just stick it in my veins!

Marge: C'mon, Homer, Japan will be fun. You like Rashoman.
Homer: That's not how I remember it.

Comic Book Guy: Yes, I would like to return your quote-unquote *ultimate* belt.
Clerk: I see. Do you a receipt, quote-unquote sir?
Comic Book Guy: No, I do not have a receipt. I won it as a door prize at a Star Trek convention, although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no need of a medium-size belt.
Clerk: Wow, a fat sarcastic Star Trek fan. You must be a devil with the ladies... gee, I hate to let you down, Casanova, but no receipt, no return.
Bart: I'll give you four bucks for it.
Comic Book Guy: Very well. I must get back to my comic book store, where I dispense the insults rather than receive them.

Drill Sergeant: Look soldier, you don't like me, and I don't like you.
Homer: I like you.
Drill Sergeant: Well, I don't like you.
Homer: Maybe you'd like me if you got to know me better.

Homer: Two hours? Why'd they build this ghost town so far away?
Lisa: Because they discovered gold right over there!
Homer: It's because they're stupid, that's why. That's why everybody does everything.

Ralph Wiggum: Me fail English? That's unpossible!

Newspaper editor: We're looking for a new food critic, someone who doesn't immediately pooh-pooh everything he eats.
Homer: Nah, it usually takes a few hours.

Homer: Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night! That just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked!
Marge: Homer!
Homer: Sorry, Moe, gotta go. My damn wiener kids are listening.

[gunshot, Flanders is knocked down]
Ned Flanders: Whew, good thing I always keep a Bible next to my...
[second gunshot, Flanders is knocked down again]
Ned Flanders: Whew, luckily I was wearing an extra large piece of the True Cross today. Uh, I'm going home now.
[as he runs off, a third gunshot spins the head of Homer's pickaxe]
Homer: What keeps doing that?
Fat Tony: I told you we should have bought more than three bullets.

[In the car on the way to Florida]
Lisa: Mom, Bart's sitting next to me!
Bart: Mom, Lisa's growing!
Marge: Quiet, you two! You know your father's just had a breakdown.
Homer: My pockets hurt.

[Homer and his band are performing a 4th of July concert in New York City]
Homer: This next song is dedicated to a very special lady. She's 100 years old and weighs over 200... tons.
Fan: This enormous lady will devour us all.
[Screams and jumps into the ocean]

Marge: You awful, awful man! Stay away from my son!
Sideshow Bob: [menacing] I'll stay away. Stay away... FOREVER!
Homer: Oh, no!
Sideshow Bob: Wait. That's no good.
[walks away, then runs back]
Sideshow Bob: I've got a good one now. Marge, say "stay away from my son" again!
Marge: No!

Lionel Hutz: And as for your case, don't you worry. I've argued in front of every judge in the state. Often as a lawyer.

Marge: Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there.
[Marge scrapes it off the ceiling into Homer's hands]
Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but...
[bites]
Homer: Mmm, sacrilicious.