Dark One Goes to Raw: 2/6 Raw Thread
 

I know it's early, but fuck you, I'm leaving for work appointments soon and this is my goddamn thread tonight.

http://17r1l63fshd52dy9yakdizhkog.wp...awgoldberg.jpg

Please place your bets for how far into the show I regret spending my money on second row seats.

Anyone who can successfully guess who in the crowd I am with zero clues other than a picture of the ring from my seat will win infinite rep.

*Will Xavier Woods pony up and dress in Patriot Swag tonight?
*Is Kofi going to celebrate the 5 time?
*Will Big E have to dress like a referee?

Slick, have fun dude.

I end up getting peoples' avatars stuck in the mind so I'm gonna be looking for an AJ Styles doppelganger with a John Cena headband.

90 minutes or by around 9:30

Wait for Braun to arrive, then leave. Beat the traffic home.

I'd like to know how they're gonna spin this Seth Rollins injury and what direction they go.

And there's "Joe's Gonna Kill You!" too.

You should be good for awhile.

Joe and Goldberg are the two main reasons I'm even going. Fully expect an opening segment to announce that Joe won't be there due to REPRIMANDS for attacking Rollins and I will probably spontaneously combust on live TV.

Arena also lists Brock, and I feel like he's not usually listed unless he'll be there, so, may be some interaction at 11:05 when concussed Goldberg shows up.

Opening 20 minuite promo

This is a pretty good guess.

Oh thank God. Joe is kicking off Raw. I will survive this opening 20 minute promo

I also apparently get Good Brothers vs Cesar's and Sheamus. Might be the 25th time, but should be good to watch.


Is it... is it possible I may be getting one of the few good Raws?

BREAKING NEWS: Some dude in line is carrying an entire box of Oatmeal Cream Pies.

If preshow counts, this threshold has already been met standing in line with a bunch of neckbeard deplorables and children.

Since the doors open at 3PM local time, it's pretty much kids and people without jobs. 95% sure the guy with the Oatmeal Creme Pies is homeless and huddling here for warmth.

Samoa Joe is kicking off the show to sign his RAW contract

And to say he "Did it for the Rock" as why he randomly decided to beat up Seth "Freakin" Rollins. :shifty:

Your one hint to find me tonight.
http://i.imgur.com/TIgjCOu.jpg

The new set seems kind of small compared to the previous one in person.

Sweet seats, dude..... I will identify you for sure, 100%

But it turns out Shane signed him to Smackdown to start the HHH/Shane feud.

...please let this happen? I'm still not watching Raw, Joe or not.

Ah where the "invisible commentator table" is.

Mint seats dude.

Fat Cat Billionaire Dark One strikes again!

Lock Jaw, I'll be the one with the monocle.

There is a dude dressed as Hulk Hogan and a kid dressed up as THE DEMON KANE on the hard camera side that are 100% going to be asked to move midway through tha show.

I'm not going. The Dark One is.

They should move them now so the move isn't on camera. Only you'd know.

Special guest commentator?????!!!?????!!!?/????

People currently losing their shit about being so close, meanwhile I'm just like "this is another show."

Hyper aware of my fatcat status.

Top 10 episode of Raw if true.

Fucking Portland hipsters chanting CM Punk.

Lot of people with Seth Rollins signs about to be disappointed.

Social Outcasts implode again with Bo vs Axel to open main event.

Axelmania runs wild via Perfect Plex.

They selling the new Samoa Joe shirt?

Didn't see it when I looked briefly at the stand.

Lama and Handsome Rusev vs Sin Cara. I think we all know how this one will end.

Lana fine as hell.

Rusev getting the Cena chants. People love Handsome Rusev.

Sin Cara almost won with an Olympic Slam into a frog splash but Handsome Rusev reigns supreme.

Cole still gets nuclear heat.

Oh shit. Going to find out ASAP if Rollins still gets his Mania match.

Anyone have a link to a really good stream? I'm using Watch Wrestling and holy shit this buffering is killing me

Joe killed him.

I was excited to be in the 2nd row the night after WM 27. Hell I was even on camera

Least Foley's out fit is better

Sharp dressed Joe

Raw brings in Bayley & Joe.

Smackdown brings in Mickie James.

I'm not forgetting anyone, right?

Dapper Joe.

So Joe kills everyone, and 3 hours of Just Joe?

Feels like I am looking at Taz atm.

He'll have trouble with BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

Sour Grapes Foley.

BOO THIS MAN, DARK!

Kevin Owens is going to be demoted with Joe around.

Believe me. I did.

Can confirm that Dark One was the little girl jumping up and down for Roman Reign's entrance

Samoa Joe Vs. A Samoan named Joe.

PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!PLEASE KILL ROMAN!!!!!!

Baddest man?

Just wait a couple minutes.

Joe's gonna kill ya Joe.

Lessons learned from this segment so far is Foley has no clue what goes on with his roster even though he's the GM and Reigns makes everything worse whenever he comes out.

Mick Foley yelling again

If Joe loses I riot.

Samoan on Samoan violence

did anything happen in the first 12 mins

unable to watch due to DirecTV Now buffering and freezing for the entire thing

Michael Cole saying they will update on Seth Rollins "a bit later on in the show"..... so in a few hours......

Trapped between two Reigns supporters. Save me TPWW.

oh god

gonna be a cesaro and sheamus match soon again

Ooof. That's a tough one.

Samoa Joe signed a contract with RAW and Roman Reigns came out and said he will fight him, and Mick Foley made the match for TONIGHT

Audio quality sucks in the arena so I will likely have no idea what's going on in 90% of the promos.

Foley yelling was the only thing I could actually hear.

If they are of age buy them a beer to switch to the Samoan Submission Machine

Just Foley not having a clue what goes on with his roster since he didn't know RAW made a deal for Joe and Joe's speech getting interrupted by Reigns since he wanted to get involved in the talkie segment.

All that to set up Joe vs Reigns later.

Joe said he had 12 years in the business and Foley did shit to help him. So, Joe is helping Triple H who signed him to NXT and brought him in on Raw. If he has to destroy Rollins so be it. Also he said he would destroy all of the fans heroes, choke them up, wake them up to choke em out again.

Oh joy.....Bayley

Nia "I must break you" Jax.

I hope Nia breaks Bayley in half here

YAY!

Kill me.

Oh shit Nia Jax.

Nia not even remotely intimidating in person.

Are they Nia Jax fans too? Maybe they are Samoan.

ASS 2 FACE

SAY IT TO HER FACE

Both of them really bad without Kevin Dunn jumpcuts.

Should yell out "Are you really not like most girls?"

No idea why I am watching this tonight. Is there anything really to look forward to? Hmmmm. Feel like all the feuds are on Smackdown.

"No, like them I won't give you my number!"

Update on Seth Rollins?

Joe vs. Roman. Don't expect much from that however.

Samoa Joe wrestling tonight. That's yugggge. But correct. Smackdown is the A show.

Later on the show reports are now 6 to 8 week recovery last time I heard.

This match should have been over by now.

Why? Bayley can't job like a bitch. She has the title match next week.

RAINMAKER!

Not quite. More like a light mist.

Feel like the update will come in as a tweet.

boooooooooooo

Throw toilet paper Darkone.

Next week is in Vegas?

They better bring back the Roulette Wheel for some wacky matches.

I should cheer Charlotte for being the reason that match ended. Good God that was brutal without camera cuts.

Quadruple jobbers in the ring....

BRRRAAAAAUUUN?

JOE IS GONNA KILL YOU, JOE!