LOL @ Lita! (spoilers)
 

She's carrying Kane's baby... oh man, I can't even begin to imagine the absurdity that's going to come out of this angle, but at least they didn't just forget about the storyline entirely.

This should be hilariously entertaining for all the wrong reasons, so discuss. :)

Maury, HELLS NO!

They will bring in Dr. Phil, who will get Tombstoned by Kane, thus making me the biggest Kane mark in the world.

:lol:

I see WWE doing something REALLY dumb... Either The Hand version 2 or a normal baby with a Kane mask... :nono:

On the next Maury monsters and the women who love them... maybe she will botch the interview

Early prediction, Lita gives birth at Wrestlemania

You know she's not pregnant.

She botched peeing.

^ LMAO!!!

In a cruel twist,it's Pete Rose that is the father. It is all just to get even with Kane.

That was pretty funny loopy. :rofl:

The father is Tyson Tomko. Her baby will have a taped on beard and tattoos that look like they should be on an ancient egyptian god.

I can't wait to see her give birth to Kane's mask.

In the biggest twist of the Century... Lita's Baby's Father IS..... (Drumroll)...... EUGENE! The ladies DO like him it turns out! :shifty:

God, when has a pregnancy angle ever turned out..... "good" for the WWE... :shifty:

just like Ric Flair knocked up Torrie or Stacy.... I dont remember which nor do I care

^^ Stacey :)

just like Jericho said, "We're both SEXXXXY BEEAASSTS BABYYYYYYYY!"

WHAT! This is the s*** that the WWE have come up with. I agree with Corkscrewed this will probably be entertaining for all the wrong reasons's including Lita botching segment after segment.

The WWE will probably say that the baby had a miscarriage due to the fact that Lita wrestled earlier in the evening.

According to Stacey, David Flair was only the second guy to ever knock her up.

She will give birth to Katie Vicks head, I guantee it

I agree with Joey here. What I wouldn't mind seeing either is Lita getting Matt to fight Kane, but falling short of getting his revenge. At a PPV (Vengeance or Summerslam), Lita turns her back on Matt, and reveals it was all a hoax by her "Master" Kane. Kane and Lita then play the scary fire based duo, with no signs of a relationship. Maybe Syn could make her debut as Kane's lover. :shifty:

OK, maybe not. But I would love to see Kane alligned with a heel diva.

Then Lita could feud with her baby because she blames it on the loss of its baby

Even more controversy could ensue if Lita fueds with the baby while still pregnant.

Didn't somebody predict that this is where the angle was going a few weeks ago? Kudos to whoever did that.

Anyway, I just want to see ONE pregnancy angle where the kid is actually born. I've never, EVER seen that happen, and everytime I see that some girl is pregnant in wrestling, I immediately begin to think of how they're gonna back out of it.

But you know, if they DID continue this whole thing...nine months is a long time to feud, isn't it?

:rofl:

:rofl:

Vince is the father, he has affairs with all the diva's.

Not Jazz

:shifty:

jeff hardy's the father

"I think I know what its about.Kane wants a kid.Lita said yes and then the next week kane was in her dressing room and said it was over so shes probably pregnant with kanes kid.That night she said she wanted to show matt how much she loved him,meaning having sex (I assume) so when she is pregnant matt thinks its his baby but kane burst his bubble and claims its his and the baby would be born round about WM21 (meaning a massive match between them both)
thats my theory anyways."

I haven't seen RAW yet..but it sounds like I was right:)

They havnt been able to do a single prenant gimmick right and I dont think this one will turn out good either. Maybe they will have it where she gets hit and loses the baby. Im just tired of the WWE pulling this crap again. If it didnt work the first time then dont do it again and again and again.

Knowing WWE, instead of waiting 9 months they'll wait like... 5 weeks... Then have her have Thing version 2 :shifty:

I wonder what The Snake has in his RAW report for this week. :lol:

How about Matt finds out that Lita slept with Kane and thinks its Kane's kid, he throws Kane into a limo and makes it crash into a trailer, Kane dies, but makes an appearance a few months later, 'through hellfire and brimstone'?

This is how I would do it.

I would have lita believe that kane is the father, slowly make us believe that, but in the end it ends up to be matt's and they live happily ever after. :)

WWE needs a happy ending every once and a while :mad:

Funny, I thought Vince Russo was fired? :lol:

Maybe I should try and get a job as a writer for WWE :y:

Lita will give birth to The Blob, and WWE will have an episode of RAW where all the matches keep getting interrupted by The Blob eating people. At the end of the episode, the WWE superstars will finally realize that The Blob's weakness is cold, thus marking the return of...

GLACIER!!!

I can see it now...

Doctor: Push...push!

*Suddenly the lights go out and red pyros launch off of Lita's spread legs. The baby walks out buck naked, except for a mask and fake hair. He heads to the center of the delivery room, raises his arms...and launches off more pyro! Jim Ross pops his head in from the waiting room.*

JR: BAH GAWD, THAT MONSTER KANE'S MONSTER BABY MONSTER JEZEBEL BAH GAWDSTUNNERINTENSESMONSTERBARBEQUESAUCE!

*The doctor picks up the baby and tries to smack its ass to help it breathe, but baby Kane no-sells the ass smacking.*

*Meanwhile, Lita tries to act shocked, but botches it and dies.*

*Meanwhile meanwhile, Matt Hardy's wrestling on Velocity.*

*Meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile...Vince Russo is crawling out from under the desk of a broadly grinning Vinne Mac.*

The End. :y:

She'll botch the pregnancy :shifty:

I just visualised that as I read it :rofl: :lol: *wipes tears of laughter*

SPOILERS!!!! (highlight below)



The current plan is for Lita to give birth to a fully grown Fake Diesel who will feud with a returning Kevin Nash. Will Ferrell is also to play a role in this angle.



Yeah.

The Undertaker is the father...to make him and Kane feud again...


Seriously when Matt finds out it isn't his baby, Matt will leave Lita and continue the awesomeness that is V-OOOONNNEEEEUUUUHHHHH

He better dump her. They're supposed to be Matt Facts, not Matt & Lita facts. :mad:

Matt Facts:

Lita and Matt Don't believe Matt is pussy whipped by Lita.

:-\

:heart: Hitman

On an upside, maybe they'll have her take "maternity leave." Then she can go and improve down in OVW.

:shifty:

I can't even tell if I'm serious about that one.

"Improvement"

I.E. 1 botch a match

<img src="http://home.earthlink.net/~tomjschuler/GTiger/kanelita.jpg">

LMAO! A rep for that one.

<font color=cyan>
The only reason Lita got knocked up is she botched oral sex.

Oh yes! And then there's the oral sex!

On the plus side, if Kane proves to be too cruel a father and if Lita hits the bottle then the baby can go move in with Uncle Mark or Grandpappy Paul. Rick Bognor can be the godparent.

They could call him The UncleTaker.

LMAO