Umaga is such crap
 

Seriously, this is one of the worst World Title programs the WWE has ever done. Umaga does not look like a threat in the least bit. The guy has done nothing to earn all these Title shots. They're trying to do the whole Hogan vs Big guy effect here and it's not working. It's not working because Umaga ain't even that big. Everytime I watch Umaga, I think of the Headshrinkers and then I think of a Headshrinker getting World Title shots.

The whole underdog thing with Cena is dead here. Does anybody really believe Cena is an underdog or that Umaga will actually win the Title?

There's so many other guys to choose from to put Cena against and this is what they give you.

I like Umaga :o

Cena does look oh so sexy rubbing against that big Somoan chest though

I like Umage. (Samoan thing.)

Also what NerF said.

I also like Umaga. It took a while for him to grow on me, but he's not bad. Just get rid of that fucking Samoan Spike.

he grew on you because they've been shoving him down your throat for the past 5 months. I can't even remember one noteable win or match the guy has had.

I like Umaga. I just don't like him feuding with Cena because you know Cena is going to win because he's the Superman underdog.

let me ask you people this. Why do you like Umaga?

If this were the case then I would like Cena by now.

he's also a poor mans Kamala by the way

I have no idea actually. I just do.

I think it's because people here compare him to Samoa Joe, and just out of sure spite for how much I hate Samoa Joe, I've decided to like Umaga. Plus I've met the guy and he's cool shit.

This Umaga guy is one hoss, I don't think I've seen any better. Man I wish he was around in my day so we could see who the real King of the Pacific was.

Umaga has lost his heat, but pre New Years Resoultion he was going pretty well for like a month or two. Really he didn't start to get rolling until he fucked up Maria.

Admittedly, I like him because there isn't much else to like on RAW right now. I recognize that he is not the greatest, or anywhere near great, but out of what I'm being offered he's worthwhile. I doubt that he'll amount to much more than this feud with Cena, but that'll be WWE's fault. Plus, I have an affinity for Samoan wrestlers.

Umaga is about as valid as 95% of the roster.

Welcome to the new WWE. It's like the old WWE--Just the stuff you'd only see on Heat.

Dammit! WX wasn't there when I started.

I just don't buy him as a champion right now. Maybe in a year, I could possibly see him winning the title as an upset (only to lose it a couple of weeks later). You know he's not going to win, so you don't get behind him.

He's a good wrestler, but is suffereing from TNA Impact disease. You have 4 moves to preform in 3 mines. Ok..... GO!

I don't buy anybody new as champion. Edge, Orton (barely), Michaels, yes. But the new generation of stars are a fucking joke (and no, I'm not really considering Orton oldschool).

Michaels is the only guy who could legit carry the strap right now. They dropped the ball with so many guys. Shelton could be there right now, Orton SHOULD be there right now. For fucks sake, Edge and Matt Hardy could even be there.

Edge really can be there. Little as I like him in his current role (he still strikes me as "ANGRY FACE"), he at least gets solid reactions.

:mad: You think you know me :mad:

Only read the first post, and I agree. Umaga is shit.

ON THIS DAY
SOMETHING SOMETHING
GAY LYRIC SODOMITE
DANCE DANCE DANCE
SOMETHING SOMETHING
I JUST TEND TO BE
TEND TO BE
EXCITE

Seriously Umaga is awful I'd rather get AIDS than see him as WWE champion

I don't mind Umaga, but not as world champion, or even in the world title picture. (Unless this was the old days where you'd believe he COULD win it).

He does have potential however. He has some sick looking moves. Check out his match with Kane at Unforgiven. I was actually surprised at how good it was. :y:

I'd also rather Skippord got AIDS than see Umaga as WWE Champion.


On that note, I'm sure he could transfer to ECW or Smackdown after Mania and make a very credible contender to either brand's World Title, if not become the actual champion.

Well I can't speak for the rest of these guys, but he did rescue my kitten from a tree.




...He totally somoa spiked the tree in the throat.

HBK and HHH?

:)

Oh, what about that match he beat Cena in a few months ago? Or did you forget that because the WWE "forgot" it?

Okay, WWE may be onto something... I don't remember that. :shifty:

^ Yeah, but when Cena pinned him anticlimactically, any buildup he'd gotten over the past... year... was destroyed.

Besides, while he's not a bad worker, he's been given relative shit to do. A thumb to the throat as a finisher is effective in real life if you do hit the wind pipe, but as a wrestling move, it just looks weak.

But it seems like every year in January, the champ has to feud against some crappy person (*cough* Lesnar vs Holly *cough*).

I think Kamala everytime I see Umage tbh

I think of that fatter black dude from "Me, Myself, and Irene."

I want to see him talking all mad scientist with a "Samoan" accent.

Umaga isn't a bad wrestler, but once again, he's been reduced. His stint in AJPW was pretty good IMO, and he has a decent moveset.

The character is the problem, not the wrestler.

I do not like Umaga. Plus what is the deal with the managerial relationship with Armando Alejandro Estrada? It just doesn't make sense to me. A wild samoan and a cuban? WTF?

Hahaha, I totally never realized that.

Their minorities... gotta stick together... obviously.

Just like black guys can have their gimmick be that they are a black guy. Its not rocket science.

Dude, it's just wrestling.

I see were are kindred spirits. *points out avatar*

Do you think Umaga sleeps with a cooked roast next to his bed?

Midnight snack.

Estrada: "UMAGA, YOU LEFT THE ROAST IN THE OVEN 3 MINUTES TOO LONG!"
(Drinks from milk carton with Rosey's picture)

Escuchah me...Deeed someone say, tree meenits?

Aha.

What happened to the other finisher Umaga did a few times? Throwing his opponent into the air, and giving them a Samoan Drop when they come down. That was a good finisher.

Thumb to the neck that usually looks like a clothesline: bad finisher.

I believe he has only done that move to Shawn Michaels.
I guess cena doesn't have a moveset that includes the skill of being able to be thrown in the air and fall. Supercena would obviously fly if thrown into the air, therefore it is in Umaga's interest not to do that move.:shifty:

That was Jamal. Two completely different people.

Okay, anyone remember One Night Stand where Cena could not even hold himself up while crotched between the rope? I remember RVD fumbling with Cena until he had to just push him over in order to just save himself from being embarassed.

Not true. Umaga did this move a few times.

Yeah, WX is right. He's done it more than once, because I remember thinking several times that that would be a better finisher than the spike.

Umaga was Jamal for a while?

Wait, who's this "Jamal," anyway?

Your mom.

She's lost weight...

I second this. Jamal is a great for a man his size, and he's really impressed me with what he can do, but this Umaga shit is just awful. The name alone pisses me off.

I'm tellin' ya. Have John Cena shave his head (the camo is already a nice match to the original red, white and blue attire), and then have Umaga change his name to Joey Samoey. Reveal his new finisher, the Hustle Crusher, and you've got yourself a real win here.

He could even get pissed off, and hit his new finisher, the "Angry Slam."

As a finisher?

Pfft, if I forgot the number of things the WWE has and as often as....um....uh.......where was I going with this? Something about masturbation?

Yeah.

Well, most of the times I saw it done were outside of a match, but it was seemingly a brutal attack that was a signature move if not a finisher.

It was often used post-match like Triple H would use a Pedigree or Batista would BOMB! ( :shifty: ) someone.

I can definately see him as Intercontinental.

If we've stopped seeing Cena as an underdog, does that mean we've given him credibility?or at least as mmuch as we can?

You know, I actually wouldn't mind seeing Umaga win the Title for a short while. The only..and I mean ONLY..reason being, that Estrada would be entertaining carrying around the gold. I picture him being like Gollum with his "precious."

If they were going to put it on Umaga, it should have been at New Year's Revolution. At least that would have kept his streak alive. Even if they took it just to the Rumble and put it back on Cena it would have been better than Cena winning with a roll up or whatever he won with.

Agreed. Yeah, that roll up was just brutal. It would have been refreshing to see Cena dominated AND PINNED. Have him chase after a seemingly "invincible" opponent for a while. They could have had a "Rocky 3" type scenerio as far as psychology goes. Have Cena get destroyed at New Years Revolution and lose the belt. Then he could have cut a promo about how he's been distracted by making movies, etc. and gotten soft. Even after this though, I'd have him keep getting fucked up by Umaga, basically like Monday night. I would even have him lose the "Last Man Standing" match.

Cena would then seem more human and thus possibly get more fan support behind him chasing after the belt as a "true" underdog, rather than build up these bullshit scenerio's WWE forces down the fans throat. How can you keep building your champion as an underdog IN EVERY SCENERIO and expect the fans to get behind him fully if HE NEVER LOSES.

With DX and Rated RKO mixing it up and taking themselves out of the Title picture, this would have been a more entertaining program for Umaga/Cena IMO. Cena winning back the belt in this fashion "Rocky 3" style would possibly have made him a much bigger and accepted face champion going into Wrestlemania.

**sigh**

But........

I recall seeing him hit the Samoan Backdrop move on Michaels, but im pretty sure he used it on Maria as well if memory serves, i could be a bit wrong on that though.

Was an awesome looking move mind!

ITS STILL REAL TO ME DAMMIT

Why did I not start this thread? I figured I was pretty notorious for hating the "Umaga" gimmick.

With that said, I'll get to the facts. Jamal can do a few things, Umaga is a shitty remake that makes Raw seem both racist and non-sensical. I'm not even going to explain how putting this Umaga against Cena in the main event picture right now doesn't make sense, it should be self-evident.

Well, the only thing left for Cena to do is make Umaga submit to the STFU in three minutes...

We might want to be careful. Knowing the WWE these days, Vince might be tempted to go with the samoan drop as his finisher, but call it the "Nigga Slam", with Michael Richards doing the play-by-play during his matches.

Or 25.5 seconds.

You know, I was playing as Lashley last night on SVR (The bitch was whining about losing every match) and I was getting Tombstoned by the Undertaker, and as I was up in the air, I heard Tazz say "Stick a fork in him..."

Apparently we don't need Richards.

Agreed.

He's another one of those 1980s throwback characters WWE could do without.

Estrada is funny as crap, though.

Estrada is a catchphrase and an exotic accent.

His microphone skills are limited to a novelty the trailer trash can chant along to.

WHAT?

This brings up an interesting thought. IF wrestling wasn't in fact pre-determined and what not, would Umaga as champ really be a problem?

I think it's more the gimmick than the person most people have problems with.

If he was more street-thuggish (just an example, I can't come up with something original right now) with the same brawling/heavy hitting style I think he'd be a good candidate. The gimmick, though, is more cartoonish than anything.

With that being said, I could buy Umaga as a champion now. Well, BEFORE he was jobbed out to Cena. Twice. I really do believe it could have worked if they put it on him at New Year's Revolution.

If some fake Samoan Savage was the champion of a legit promotion, they'd be laughed out of business.

Good thing Joe was never champion...

I hate the thumb poke of doom with passion.

wow lol

Couldn't hurt them at this point.

In a Umaga match versus Michaels:

JR: OHMAHGAWDWHATTHEHELLBARBEQUESAUCE!!! Umaga just did that damn Samoan Drop! That's gotta be it for Michaels.

RICHARDS: Better stick that fork in his ass.

KING: But he's not black, Michael.

RICHARDS: WHAT?! YOU'VE BEEN TALKING AND TALKING AND TALKING, WITH NOTHING COMING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH, YOU NIGGER LOVER!!

JR: That's not necessary!

RICHARDS: Those words, those words, those words.

KING: What do you think he calls that?

RICHARDS: Idon'tknow Idon'tknow Idon'tknow!

JR: He has to name it something.

RICHARDS: I think he mouthed "Nigga Slam".

KING: There he goes again.

RICHARDS: SHUT UP!! YOU CAN TALK, YOU CAN TALK, YOU CAN TALK, YOU'RE A BRAVE MAN NOW MOTHERFUCKER!!

KING: What the hell are you talking about?

RICHARDS: Idon'tknow Idon'tknow Idon'tknow!

{After Umaga wins the match}

JR: And Umaga wins.

RICHARDS: Now to get to those Crime Tyme niggers and shove a fucking fork up their asses.

KING: Oh God, look, this is why you were banned from the Laugh Factory, and only had Seinfeld as your claim to fame, you racist.

RICHARDS: Oh, I guess you're right. I'm an old hack. Gotta be doing this shitty piece of shit show with you two nigger lovers. That's what he gets for pinning the white man, right?

KING: That's it!

King fucks Richards up, hanging Richards by his testicals.

JR: OHMAHGAWD!! What a beautiful piledriver.

KING: [whispering] Uh, JR, I never did the piledriver.

JR: Uhh...WHAT A BEAUTIFUL PILEDRIVER!!

KING: I give up....OH, PUPPIES!! YEAH, JR, THAT WAS A PERFECT PILEDRIVER I DID ON THAT RACIST FUCK!!

{Thus ended Richards' connentating career}

The point of that, believe it or not, was not to dictate what WWE needs at this point. It was a crack that involve a Tazz saying, a video game, and an inverted negro.

I think what WWE needs is Simon from Idol. He can brutally tear into every match, every character. Face or Heel. Rip apart JR, King, Coach, and Vince. Finally, cue "The Game," and Trips walks out, down to the ring for his triumphant return. He gets to the ring, grabs a mic, looks to the crowd and says... "One second."

He then drops the microphone, rolls out of the ring, and walks to the announce table, where he grabs Simon, clears the announce table, and PEDIGREE! BAH GAWD!

Thus cementing his face return. Because you can't come back from an injury heel.

If you want to continue it, have Simon back Rated RKO or something. ;)

I always thought AAE was some sort of pocher and caught Umaga in the wild.

Nah, that would be racist. And Vince hates racism.

It's true. Didn't you see the Cryme Tyme segment with that ichael Richards impersonator.