Things that Happen in Wrestling that Never Happen in Real Life.......
 

We all know that you are supposed to suspend disbelief while watching wrestling, but there are some things that are so ridiculous that it's impossible for them to occur in real life.

Earl Hebner should have been fired 900 times over the years. How many big matches has he blown? But somehow he maintains his Senior Referee status.

When a face-about-to-turn-heel wrestler tags up with another face to wrestle two heels, they always participate in the match normally, beating other guys up and getting beat up, and at the last moment they decide to turn on their partner. why not do that in the first place instead of getting hurt?

I'm not a physics major, but when you grab someones hand and swing them one way, they don't usually go running towards that direction.

Add on.

A guy always stops talking when someone else's entrance music hits.

Well that's not surprising, cause usually the music drowns him out.
What gets to me is that those people in the sound truck are so sharp on music cues, and oh so willing to cooperate with any bastard who needs a music cue to carry out their evil plots.

Also, remember those WCW BattleBowl PPVs? Tag teams were "drawn" out of a hat and 85% of the time each team consisted of guys who hated each other(Sting and Vader, Flair and Savage, etc.).

An employee of yours goes to your house and rapes your wife, all while cameras are there watching and not stopping anything. No charges are pressed and it's completely forgotten 2 weeks later by the entire family.

Hulk Hogan has been doing his Hulk Up routine for almost 20 years now. How come his opponents still hit him when he starts to Hulk Up? I would get out of the ring and wait until he calms down. I swear, every Hogan opponent does the same thing and no one has ever tried anything different.

Hardcore Holly beating up Brock Lesnar

Where to even begin?

-getting thrown into a pit of fire/dropped in a car from 30 feet up/electrocuted by the testicles and coming back within 2 weeks without a scratch.

-a television camera being fully prepared any time anything at all happens, even in the most personal moments you could think of (without involving the bathroom)

-90% of all wrestling moves today.

On RAW this week.. Magical camera angles, and a camera just happens to be waiting in a limo.

yeah i like it when the camera zooms in on the limo, the JR or King or Cole or Tazz go "WOW werent Expecting ANYONE tonight... WHO COULD IT BEE??!?" when its obvious they've been there for awhile, also i like it how cameras just happen to be backstage

"we've gotten a message from.. the mess, hall, because you know, we need to always have a camera in there to watch our superstars carb intake, but other then that, here comes mick foley to try and beat on Ortan! BAH GAWD I NEVER EXPECTED THIS!"

The Undertaker brings many things to mind (Kane too).

The Booker-T scissors kick... who stays bent over in one spot for so long?

The Pedigree doesn't look like it hurts bad enough to render someone unconcious for a 3-count.

The Figure-4 doesn't look like it hurts at all.

Have you ever put someone in one or been put in one?

I've been put in the Figure-4 a couple of times. It does hurt.

Please allow me to give you one......... :naughty:

FIGURE 4 IS VERRRRRRRRY PAINFUL

On raw this monday-

The magical limo where when austin drove off the trunk be put a dent in it but when the limo drove away the dent was gone.

the figure four does indeed hurt... I've put people in it as well as been placed in it... and the pedigree can indeed knock some sense into ya... they just had to seriously water it down

yea I notice that crap. just like the sharpshooter and the Walls of Jericho. They dont put it on anymore like they used to. It used to look like it really hurt but now it looks horrible.

in steel cage matches when the soon to be winner of the match is climbing out and soon to be the loser always tries to climb out too and never uses the fk'n door.

yes why don't they ever use the daggone door? it is so much quicker

or how about guys who take 7 mintues to climb a fk'n ladder and grab the belt. DAM you Jeff Hardy, you could of been WWE Champion.

Getting smacked in the head with a sledge hammer and not ending up dead!

Always being able to find a baking tray or trash can under the ring at all times.!

And honestly, you'd think they'd of moved the damn Spanish announce table by now

Yeah, even Zach Gowen and guys who have never wrestled in the WWE before have entrance themes and videos being set by the sound trailer.

It's because the people in charge are total pussies.

A goon of an employee boning the boss' daughter for 2 years, then marrying the bitch, and also makes the boss of the business his bitch.

You're forgetting GTV...

"They call you theBig Show?"

:lol:

But yeah. The WWE must have more cameras than the US government...

that people can get their asses kicked all match, somehow make a comeback, score 3 or 4 moves and win

I remember when Tatanka started doing his war dance around the ring (his hulk up) and Bam Bam Bigelow did an enziguri, knocked him out. I remember laughing at it, even when I was a little kid

Oh yeah, and another thing about the cameras...

When angles like the Trish/Jericho/Christian dealie happen, the commentary teams talk about the video footage, but everyone else is oblivious...

I mean, what, with all those cameras, no-one thinks they might be broadcast?

EVERYTHING is solved in ring.

Forget the fact that a marriage where there's VIDEO EVIDENCE that the woman was unconscious would not be legally binding, let's wrestle for the annulment!

What about when Big Show had the poops?

Anyway... Landing on a friggin bomb and surviving without losing a limb comes to mind...

Wrestlers always walk into the "It doesnt matter _____" crap from the Rock... God, dont give him the chance!

The ref is always conveniently placed into the corner for a squish... Or always knocked out until he conveniently regains consiousness to count the three count... Or they cant get up from a single punch for 5 minuites...

Drinking on the job... (obvious)

People staying down long enough for a People's Elbow, when all he does is give you a spine buster... Sure, the spine buster will hurt a bit, but not keep you down for 3 damn minuites for Rock to get the whole side-to-side thing... Or why does the People's Elbow hurt more than any other elbow?

You dont get hurt hitting someone off the top rope when hitting somthing, but when you miss, you still have the same force, only you get really hurt (The elbow drop comes to mind)...

Well, in the elbow drop, the opponent cushions the blow.

A better example would be a missile dropkick.

Thats true, and yeah, the missle drop kick is a better example, yet, the opponant would slow the fall... Leg drop may be a little better, because the leg is usually bent, and they miss the whole body...

Giving birth to a hand

Jericho (i think) Kicked hulk in the crotch when he was hulking up.

^ Find a clip of that. It'd be hilaroius.

Mr. America :shifty:

:rofl: Id love to see that... Do you remember when it happened?

Some time on smack down.

Girls getting mad at when guys go in to there locker room but the're ok with the live cameras.

The 619. Nobody stays in that position waiting for someone to come swinging at you, while they're looking that way! Besides, it wouldn't even hurt

Getting hit by a car and not going to jail for a while

How in real life in a working area, everyone would gang up on HHH as fast as possible

I don't rememebr this.

He may have just kicked him in the stomache

Or when Regal snuck a peek at him, and was so amazed at what he saw that he forgot what he was doing and watered Show's leg?

Wait a minute, why do all these bathroom bits involve the Big Show???

Since when is it illegal to get hit by a car?

::Since when is it illegal to get hit by a car?

last week

Worst Possible Thing:

Triple H's Sledgehammer hitting you anywhere and you don't die or have to retire.

A man is so mad at the events of WRESTLING he invades another man's house, the 2nd man who is wating inside for the first man, FIRES SHOTS AT HIM, and no one is prosecuted, or even persued. In fact, no one knows for a week weather or not someone got shot. HMMMMM

When a heel is beating up someone, and has their backs turned, and a baby face comes in...yet no matter how loud the crowd cheers and screams, he can't notice someone coming in behind him.

The chair shots. You mean to tell me that everybody in the arena can hear the chair hit somebody but the ref (who has his back turned) a few feet away can't hear it.

A man who's suffering from a chronic back injury gets his back worked on throughout the whole match, taking numerous back breakers and other moves focused on the back. after being down for a long time, he suddenly "nips-up", heads to the top rope, then delivers a flying elbow. there is no look of pain in his face, as he tunes up the band and hits the opponent with a superkick, picking up the victory.

I say this is bullsh*t.

Buried alive matches are bullshit too

kane and vince "killed" the undertaker but never got arrested

Telling off or Punching out the boss and not getting fired

Meh the cops just knew he'd rise again, they read the spoilers. :shifty:

The fact that every single person falls for Austin's "I'm pissed at you, but hell, let's have a beer."

Vince cowering inside his limo with Austin's ATV parked on top, when if he'd been smart and had the driver just floor it...

Or just open the door and bolt. Austin would have taken a while to get down from there and resume pursuit.

Being beat by Scottys Worm..

Most Clothesline don't beat you unless of course it is Bradshaws clothesline "FROM HELL".

The Hulk Up. No one can get up after being hit by two "lead pipe" shots, a leg drop from a ladder onto a table, and another leg drop.

How about an Inferno match... Didnt Kane come back within the next week or so without bandages?

Has that ever happened in wrestling?

Excatly what I was saying when I saw that the other night.

<font color=goldenrod>In over the top matches like battle royals or Royal Rumbles, at least one announcer HAS to favor the biggest guy in the match, yet the biggest in one of those matches hasn't won since the early 90s, why have the announcers not yet figured out that being big doesn't = victory?</font>

Because Vince has a big man fetish?

none of the announcers are all that bright...I'd say it's pretty realistic...;)

1: If you get kicked in the gut hard enough, your going to get winded, now the most natural reaction to getting winded is bending over.

2: hmmm..the pedigree doesn't look like it hurts bad enough to get a pin fall, ok when you fall over you try to automatically put your arms down to break your fall, now if someones got you underhooked by the arms then whats stopping you (in the case of a padigree) but your face (or maybe a when the rock or kane takes a pedigree then put a knee down)

also the pedigree (enough the im totalling in agreement with the whole HHH-era thing) is one of the worst looking finishing moves in the business

3: When taking a figure four the pain, if applied directly and with the intension of hurting f</>ucking hurts, the pain from your knee is seriously bad (if applied properly) the muscles that are on the inside of your knee and the back of your knee is where the pain comes

:y:

Booker T scissors kick: Test sold this pretty well last week. He bent down, and while Book was running to the ropes he fell down to one knee then began to get up. It gave Booker plenty of time to come back. Some guys just bend over and it looks horrible.

How about the setups? Why is it that when somebody wrestles Rikishi they just happen to land in the turn buckle ready for a stink face. THe same guy then wrestles Rey Mysterio and never ends up in that same position, but conveniently drapes his arms over the second rope ready for a 619.

And let's not forget the Undertaker. God...the guy sends Kane a message, and I'm not even going to get into the mysterious smoke and "rain" or even the "lightning" What about his mysterious message: In x days the dead will rise. THe only thing I was thinking durring all of this was "Man, 'taker's a damn good graphic artist. His mysterious message looks like it was designed by a professional." If I was rising from the dead to take revenge on my evil brother, I wouldn't worry about how good it looks, I'd just try to get the message across. Maybe I'd get a little artsy and use Ariel font instead of Times New Roman, but I guess 'taker's just a little more artistic than me. Maybe that's why he's got those tatoos. Hmm....One of them was the name of his wife. Funny how being dead and all she didn't mourn or anything. Matter of fact, the cops were glad to arrest Kane for beating up Shane, but they just kind of shrugged off a murder...a murder from someone who had a suspicious involvement in the death of a Miss Katie Vick a while back. THat's odd...

Scott hall seeing stone cold with a "shotgun" in his hand and just turns around.

I think rey now just drop toe holds him in to it
--------------------
Deciding 2 turn your body so some on can get a good frog splash on you.

1. Damn right. Lotta people who get hit/kicked in the gut'll stay down.

2. The Pedigree does tend to smash you in the face...Or, at least it would if it was a real move and not staged. Of course, in the real world, most people would never be able to land the pedigree against an oppononent above the age of 5, unless they're fighting a quadraplegic.

3. Submission moves are generally watered down. Most of them really hurt.

I agree. It's totally unrealistic that people who use these finishers would ever actually get their opponents in the right position. I mean, Rikishi doesn't know where you've got to put a guy for the Stinkface or the Banzai Drop. And why would Rey Rey ever throw someone into the ropes for his own finisher, a move that requires them on the ropes...

:wtf:

While we're at it, why does Brock pick a guy up before putting him in the F-5? Totally unrealistic.

Ok. I submit. I'm an idiot newbie. Honestly I don't watch SD much so I picked bad examples.

In old Crash Holly matches when they were just ramdomly filming him going home or at the local carnival then all of a sudden....WHAT?? He's being attacked!!!

Nothing personal, I just think you picked a bad argument.

Most people will be actively trying to get into a position where they can use their best moves...Which in the dramatic testosterone soap opera of wrestling is your signature moveset. It doesn't matter which show you're on...It doesn't matter ow real or unreal your finishers are. It's the same for the 619 and People's Elbow as it is for Sweet Chin Music and the Walls of Jericho (You know, back before they neutered the move).

You're talking like we are expected to believe it's coincidence. If we were, it's unreasonable. We're not, though--We're expected to believe that two trained men will each vye for positions in which they can best execute their best moves.

You try moving up a Ladder very fast after your body has gotten the crap beaten out of it and is in very bad shape from spots and chairshots....Of Course...We should be blaming the Undertaker, for taking a wicked Charishot and being back up, Totally fine in less then 10 seconds....