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The Outlaw 01-15-2004 09:57 PM

Funniest Line Ever
 
John Cena: "I'll bounce you quicker than an ECW check."

Tazz: "I've had one of those. They suck."

Post more funny one liners from shows. :y:

Corkscrewed 01-15-2004 10:17 PM

"And that's why I kicked your leg out of your... leg!!"

Mr. JL 01-15-2004 10:42 PM

Michael Cole: "Tazz, you know how good Paul Heyman's word is..."

Tazz: "Yeah, about as good as the checks he wrote"


* kinda like the first one, but Outlaws just reminded me of this one.

wrestling_god 01-15-2004 10:57 PM

when taker got limp bizkits music at i think backlash.

jr: his bizkit isnt limp folks i can guarentee that


also the divorce of HHH and Stephanie

STEPH: when it came to the Game it came up short

HHH: maybe it wasnt the game but the feild the game was being played on
Even a 747 looks small going through the Grand canyon


funny shit

mikenegrin 01-15-2004 11:03 PM

best line ever is:

cena:you couldnt find 2 lines to rhyme if your brain had lo-jack! how am i gonna get out battled by a wannabe cojack?

kurt angle: ok i dont even know what you just said

spd10000 01-15-2004 11:12 PM

Cena's line on Smackdown tonight, "don't spit it out, everybody knows you swallow!" :lol: :lol: :lol:

FourFifty 01-15-2004 11:16 PM

Justin Credible: That's not just the coolest! That's not just the greatest! My friends, that's
Steve Corino: THE LAMEST F</U>UCKING CATCH PHRASE!

John la Rock 01-15-2004 11:33 PM

The Rock to the Hurricane...

"Who in the Green Hell are you? oh wait The Rock knows exactly who you are. green shirt, green cape, green mask, oh you're the Hamburgler! Why don't get The Rock a cheeseburger, no ketchup!"

Raw February 2003 in TO

:lol:

Mike the Metal Ed 01-15-2004 11:37 PM

"Standing by now, Gene Okurland, with Ravishing Rick Rude and Bobby "the Brain" Heenan

Gene: Gentlemen as you know, the Ultimate Warrior... **** IT!!!

Mike the Metal Ed 01-15-2004 11:39 PM

Sid: And all the steptics... skeptics... Can we start over?

JR: This is live pal

Sid: Shit.

(Or something to that effect, I only have a potentially censored WWF Funniest Moments clip to go by)

natureboycv 01-16-2004 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HardKore UK
Sid: And all the steptics... skeptics... Can we start over?

JR: This is live pal

Sid: Shit.

(Or something to that effect, I only have a potentially censored WWF Funniest Moments clip to go by)

<font color=8307ff><b>LOL

I think I saw that one on TV before. :cool:</font></b>

Blue Demon 01-16-2004 12:33 AM

Ric Flair (to maven): I've had more championships than you've had women! WOOOO!

Splaya 01-16-2004 12:55 AM

The Rock and Chris Jericho's rhyming contest



Rock: Oh Chris Jericho I see you and the Rock this is like a rhyming contest. Well the Rock has one for you. See heres one about Booker T and Shane. Booker T, the long haired sucka and Shane Mcmahon the Silver spoon mother****a.



Classic :lol:

BasicThuganomics 01-16-2004 01:18 AM

Kurt Angle: Whats the big deal about coming back from a torn quad after 8 months? I tore my quad this morning and I feel fine! He's probably been sitting around for 8 months listening to his crappy U2 cd. Beautiful Day? I'll tell you a beautiful day! A beautiful day was when I won these Olympic gold medals with a broken freaking neck!

Big Show: You can't see me! I'm a giant! In my world, you're the white girl and I'm Kobe Bryant!

Big Show: Chicks dig it big, That's one of them there "in-u-en-dos"

Val Venis: hehe, and they call you the Big Show??

John Cena: Oh and Big Show, don't think I've forgotten about you homie!
You a giant? Well I'm a giant whistle so go ahead and blow me!

Rock: Admit it Lillian, you get wet...... with perspiration! just standing this close to the Rock!

Rock: ... and the heavens opened up and God himself said, "Brett?" "but my name's Billy?" It doesn't matter what your names is!!!! (the first time he said it doesn't matter was freakin awesome)

Those aren't exact, but close enough....

Corkscrewed 01-16-2004 02:20 AM

Ah yes, the Billy Gunn "We don't care about you" Rock promo was priceless.

Stickman 01-16-2004 02:49 AM

Jason Sensation when mocking the great Owen Hart, something along the lines of, "I look like an aardvark."

Tornado 01-16-2004 08:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stickman
Jason Sensation when mocking the great Owen Hart, something along the lines of, "I look like an aardvark."

<font color=#33ffff>Didn't he also say something along the lines of:

"I'm sorry im late, but my nose was here half an hour ago...."</font>

Disturbed316 01-16-2004 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tornado
<font color=#33ffff>Didn't he also say something along the lines of:

"I'm sorry im late, but my nose was here half an hour ago...."</font>

ROFL

Aww the classic :'(

Loose Cannon 01-16-2004 11:17 AM

From the Rockers breakup segment

Heenan, "Did you see that. Jannety just jumped through the window....What a coward."

loopydate 01-16-2004 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loose Cannon
From the Rockers breakup segment

Heenan, "Did you see that. Jannety just jumped through the window....What a coward."

Heenan rules. That and every time he talked about the multiple Doinks like they were holograms... Priceless.

Cactus Sid 01-16-2004 11:26 AM

HHH at King Of The Ring 98

"I'm Bi a lot of things, but Lingual isn't one of them.... wait did I just say that?"

Loose Cannon 01-16-2004 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loopydate
Heenan rules. That and every time he talked about the multiple Doinks like they were holograms... Priceless.

LOL LOL that was classic

WM 9 "What a trick, how does he do it?...There must be a battery laying in the ring."

Splaya 01-16-2004 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tornado
<font color=#33ffff>Didn't he also say something along the lines of:

"I'm sorry im late, but my nose was here half an hour ago...."</font>

Sensation also went as far as to say "I am a nugget" i think?

kane_knight_swallows 01-16-2004 11:55 AM

Still like the D-X presidental speech.

The Outlaw 01-16-2004 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkscrewed
"And that's why I kicked your leg out of your... leg!!"

:lol:@quote

:'(@guy who said it :(:(

LOL some quality quotes in herre.

Synergy 01-16-2004 07:34 PM

I don't remember exactly what Bossman said, but basically Angle asked him if he would have his back against the Big Show and Bossman started on about how he stole his fathers' corpse. Kurt's response was to look scared, back off and go "rrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhhhhtt".

Kurt: "Okay Rock, you don't like me, and I don't like you..."

Rock: "Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, wo-ah. Why don't you like the Rock?!"

Kurt: "Because you are always mean to me and keep telling me you want to shove my medals up my ass!"


An unintentionally funny one was something Brock said back in August/September last year...

"Kurt Angle...... YOU AND ME ARE NOT OVER!"

Jeez when the biggest pushed guy on SD comes out an admits it on air you know the companies in trouble! ;)


The best one though was Heymans from Survivor Series in 2001 when Austin has Rock in the sharpshooter:

Heyman: "Tap!! TAP!! TAP!!"

JR: "The Rock aint gonna tap with so much at stake!"

Heyman: "Why doesn't Hebnar just call for the goddam bell?!"

JR: " Because he hasn't given up"

Heyman: "BUT IT NEVER STOPPED HIM BEFORE!!"

:lol:

BasicThuganomics 01-16-2004 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synergy
Heyman: "Tap!! TAP!! TAP!!"

JR: "The Rock aint gonna tap with so much at stake!"

Heyman: "Why doesn't Hebnar just call for the goddam bell?!"

JR: " Because he hasn't given up"

Heyman: "BUT IT NEVER STOPPED HIM BEFORE!!"

:lol:


HAHAHA Paul Heyman is a freaking genius on a microphone....

MVP 01-16-2004 07:50 PM

Tony Schiavone: He was planted down on the mat.
Commentator: Yeah planted down hard. Just like a...plant.

I forgot who the other commentator was, but I heard it in a clip.

Evil Vito 01-18-2004 03:13 PM

<font color=goldenrod>During the Survivor Series 2001 Immunity Battle Royal with all the WWF and Alliance guys that didn't already have matches that night:

Tazz (who was a WWF guy by this point in the Invasion angle) got eliminated and Heyman starts laughing at him. Tazz charges towards Heyman, who then hides behind JR taunting Tazz. JR and Heyman then argue for the rest of the match over various issues with Hyeman calling JR a sexist.</font>

Jeremy Christian 01-18-2004 03:31 PM

One Smackdown after Bradshaw uses the Clothesline from Hell on Shaniqua:

Tazz: "If you don't believe in God now, start."


The Rock to a group of security guards:

Rock: "Do you like *long pause* doughnuts?"

Nowhere Man 01-18-2004 09:23 PM

"...and there's the FLYING LEG KICK!!!"

Fryza 01-18-2004 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synergy
The best one though was Heymans from Survivor Series in 2001 when Austin has Rock in the sharpshooter:

Heyman: "Tap!! TAP!! TAP!!"

JR: "The Rock aint gonna tap with so much at stake!"

Heyman: "Why doesn't Hebnar just call for the goddam bell?!"

JR: " Because he hasn't given up"

Heyman: "BUT IT NEVER STOPPED HIM BEFORE!!"

:lol:

LOL

FourFifty 01-18-2004 10:05 PM

When The Dudley Boyz first entered the WWF/E/Whatever, playing poker with the APA. Bradshaw said something about Bubba's mom.

Bubba: Did you hear what he just said about our mother?
D-Von: She's not my momma! *laughs*

The Ravishing One 01-18-2004 10:15 PM

When it comes to comedy in wrestling theres only one person i look for, Bobby Heenan!

And man didnt he make me laugh, for example

Bobby Heenan speaking on the Rosatti sisters (fat sisters)
"I see the rodeo's in town again."

Just the way he says things aswell!

blake639raw 01-18-2004 10:36 PM

Cena, rapping on Lesnar:

"Even with a knife, and a dictionary, you couldn't cut a promo right.
I'm the new big thing dude, you ain't even a prototype." :love:

Not the best ever, just one that wasn't mentioned that I like. Cena has a bunch of great one liners.

ColdwaVer 01-18-2004 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Ravishing One
When it comes to comedy in wrestling theres only one person i look for, Bobby Heenan!

And man didnt he make me laugh, for example

Bobby Heenan speaking on the Rosatti sisters (fat sisters)
"I see the rodeo's in town again."

Just the way he says things aswell!

Yeah, I remember when they were doing the Savage/Elizabeth wedding, Hillbilly Jim was a guest on Prime Time wrestling with Heenan and Monsoon, and wanted to do a song for the couple, Heenan says "Hey, this is my show! What is this, wrestling Hee-Haw?"

Another classic Heenan moment on PTW: Ted DiBiase was looking for the missing Million Dollar Belt, and he and Sherri were running a metal detector over everybody in the studio, they come to Heenan and his pocket goes off:

DiBiase: Another watch? What are you doing with two watches?
Heenan: Well, I, ummm...
DiBiase (reading the back of the watch): "Vince McMahon?"
Heenan: It was a gift!

Loose Cannon 01-18-2004 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ColdwaVer
Yeah, I remember when they were doing the Savage/Elizabeth wedding, Hillbilly Jim was a guest on Prime Time wrestling with Heenan and Monsoon, and wanted to do a song for the couple, Heenan says "Hey, this is my show! What is this, wrestling Hee-Haw?"

Another classic Heenan moment on PTW: Ted DiBiase was looking for the missing Million Dollar Belt, and he and Sherri were running a metal detector over everybody in the studio, they come to Heenan and his pocket goes off:

DiBiase: Another watch? What are you doing with two watches?
Heenan: Well, I, ummm...
DiBiase (reading the back of the watch): "Vince McMahon?"
Heenan: It was a gift!

LMAO at stealing Vince's watch

The Ravishing One 01-19-2004 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ColdwaVer
Yeah, I remember when they were doing the Savage/Elizabeth wedding, Hillbilly Jim was a guest on Prime Time wrestling with Heenan and Monsoon, and wanted to do a song for the couple, Heenan says "Hey, this is my show! What is this, wrestling Hee-Haw?"

Another classic Heenan moment on PTW: Ted DiBiase was looking for the missing Million Dollar Belt, and he and Sherri were running a metal detector over everybody in the studio, they come to Heenan and his pocket goes off:

DiBiase: Another watch? What are you doing with two watches?
Heenan: Well, I, ummm...
DiBiase (reading the back of the watch): "Vince McMahon?"
Heenan: It was a gift!

HAHA!!!! Wrestling needs Heenan back!

Corkscrewed 01-19-2004 11:27 PM

^ Agreed 100x.

Mr. JL 01-20-2004 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synergy
I don't remember exactly what Bossman said, but basically Angle asked him if he would have his back against the Big Show and Bossman started on about how he stole his fathers' corpse. Kurt's response was to look scared, back off and go "rrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhhhhtt".

Kurt: "Okay Rock, you don't like me, and I don't like you..."

Rock: "Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, wo-ah. Why don't you like the Rock?!"

Kurt: "Because you are always mean to me and keep telling me you want to shove my medals up my ass!"


An unintentionally funny one was something Brock said back in August/September last year...

"Kurt Angle...... YOU AND ME ARE NOT OVER!"

Jeez when the biggest pushed guy on SD comes out an admits it on air you know the companies in trouble! ;)


The best one though was Heymans from Survivor Series in 2001 when Austin has Rock in the sharpshooter:

Heyman: "Tap!! TAP!! TAP!!"

JR: "The Rock aint gonna tap with so much at stake!"

Heyman: "Why doesn't Hebnar just call for the goddam bell?!"

JR: " Because he hasn't given up"

Heyman: "BUT IT NEVER STOPPED HIM BEFORE!!"

:lol:


OOOOHHH! lol


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