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RAW Captions [1-19-04]
Hell, I'm as surprised as you guys are that they already have a picture up, but...
Fire away. http://www.square-enix-usa.com/asset...RES-CUT_07.jpg |
ROFLMAO!!!!
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Fans weren't sure how to react to the new stipulation that the Royal Rumble winner gets to sleep with the three FF X-2 girls. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/front.jpg Finally giving in to internet fans' requests, the WWE has a "useless wrestler bonfire," completely with countdown orders. |
AAMER HALEEM: And that's Madonna coming in at #31 on VH1's "100 Celebrities that loopydate Would Most Like to Shoot in the Face With a Howitzer." And now...
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Goldberg seemed a lot less threatening when WWE started displaying the wrestlers' IQs while introducing them. |
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The real reason why Kane attacked Spike Dudley after the match... It was a "Loser plays FFX-2 Match." |
By god I’m bored… M’eh, guess I’ll just do some old captions for the hell of it… Should be sleeping, but m’eh.
<img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102102/images/Stl0018.jpg> Triple H: HA HA HA HA HA HA! Coach: But I’m being serious, Triple H. Triple H: Me? Without the world title? You should do standup! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0001.jpg> Burying Sean O’Haire wasn’t enough. Triple H had to make sure he was in drag before he went under. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0004.jpg> So far the title-ectomy wasn’t going as painlessly as Triple H hoped. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0011.jpg> The whole Test/Shannon Moore thing didn’t go over to well with the fans. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0021.jpg> Al: Listen Chris, I’ve seen a few episodes of Queer Eye For The Straight guy, and that shirt has GOT to go! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/010603/images/Stl0001.jpg> Eric: Now if anyone have seen Sean Morley’s career, please mail it to my office. <img src=http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/082202/images/Stl0016.jpg> Well, if I saw that in the mirror every day, lord knows I’d go blind someday. <img src=http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/103102/images/Stl0027.jpg> With the ref’s back turned away from the action, Max Mini applies the ankle lock on Tajiri. Damned if I’m not sleepy now… Still bored… Enjoy, laugh, call me an idiot or a loser, pish, yeah, whatever, I’ll forget I ever did this by the time I wake up. Yay for my 100th post! |
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You may've hid from everyone else,but even without the glasses I know that you're Waldo goddamnit!!! |
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So sad when a video game gets more airtime than about the entire WWE roster combined. Well, at least that middle one is good on the mic... |
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This week's edition of Final Fantasy X-2 is brought to you by WWE RAW |
LOL..What the hell is going on in here.
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Triple H finally released his 2003 who jobbed to me list |
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RVD: Okay, Matt. Kicking off the show, how many times do you think they'll play the "Final Fantasy X-2" commercial? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg Christian was in trouble. It was bad enough that he was bent over in position for the Axe Kick, but he didn't realize that Booker was also conjuring up a Hadoken! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg Christian, WWE's Cartwheel Teacher, was not known for being gentle. CHRISTIAN: Go over, dammit! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg Frustrated, Christian let his apprentice Matt take a crack at it. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg CHRISTIAN: That's good. Now, just roll the rest of the way... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg Jericho didn't know what to think. Maybe he SHOULD shake hands with Rene as sort of a goodwill gesture, but...did Rene HAVE to masturbate while they did it? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg Rene "Decaptiator" Dupree celebrated his first WWE singles victory. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg Jericho thought he had the match won until Dupree pinched him. Hard. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg Mmm...noodle soup! DAMMIT! *Rep (if possible) to (s)he who gets the reference* http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg Rico was elated. Santa was real! He got JUST what he wanted...four weeks late. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg RICO: Damn you, Xanta Klaus, you sly trickster! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg Spike was scared of the impending two-handed chokeslam, but what really freaked him out was the komodo dragon climbing up Kane's leg. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg Glen "Boo-Boo Kisser" Jacobs unveils yet another new gimmick. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg TEST: Okay, Scott. Now, you hook his tights, lift, and fall back. SCOTT: What's this called again? TEST: It's a suplex. GOLDBERG: Suhpluh? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg Goldberg got Scotty with the old "Hey, somebody left a 'roid needle on the canvas" gag. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/16.jpg Bill was confused. Scott had the Superman logo on his tights, but when he threw him off the building...he just fell. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg The ref could tell the fans were losing interest. The Steiner/Goldberg match was in Hour Seventeen. It was finally time to bust out...the REFAROONIE! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg Falling asleep mid-promo: Another side effect of being a Drunken, Idiotic Redneck. Grab a pink slip. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/24.jpg Turning on your headlights when you're inside a well-lit arena: Another side effect of being a Drunken, Idiotic Redneck. Grab a pink slip. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg TRISH: Why do you have Mae Young on speed-dial? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg That bastard Mayor McCheese had tricked him! That was the thought running through Teddy's mind as he's getting mauled by the Orange Fry Guy. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/27.jpg Jazz revealed what wrestling fans had long suspected: Lita had (literally) no ass. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/28.jpg *Does anyone else think it looks like they just Photoshopped Hurricane into this picture?* While Randy Orton does his best Buff Bagwell taunt, Hurricane prepares for a Blockbuster. All part of Vince's "Ha ha! I fired you before the Invasion appreciation night." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg The Old Guy, the Leviathan, the SHIT, and the Hurricane had gathered: Village People 2004 were set to take over the world! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg D-VON: Hey, Ric! Do one of those ballet jumps. I'll catch you. RIC: Okay... BUBBA: Heheheh... DAVE: No! It's a trap! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg D-Von didn't know if he wanted any part of this. Coach and Bubba were walking around, fingers extended, trying to blind the Giant Steven Richards. For D-Von, though, it didn't seem quite...Christian. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/32.jpg One Giant Stevie Kick later, and the plot fell apart. BUBBA: I got him... COACH: Not me, you idiot...uhhhhnnnn... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg While Randy Orton enjoyed his new invisible chair, Mark Henry tried his new invisible jetpack, and Teddy Long did his world-famous New Jack impression, the audience was left with one unified thought: :?: http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/34.jpg JR: You lift one mid-carder, what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt... KING: There's a reason they didn't let you sing folk songs on Originals. |
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OH MY GOD!!!!! THAT'S BETTER THAN MOST OF MY CAPTIONS (not saying much, but still)!!!!!!!!!!! :y: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :y: |
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Matt: "Dude... I'm like... holding up the glass ceiling... man..." RVD: "I should really start hiding my stash better." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg This picture of a Hacksaw Jim Duggan-style pose by Booker T was later on sale on eBay for $29.99. OR Booker T called desperately for help. Christian Wiggum had eaten the poisonous berries again. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg It was a long and arduous process, complicated by a leg first delivery, but in the end, Christian gave birth to a healthy Booker T. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg Unfortunately, nurse Hardy dropped him on the floor while Doctor Ref's back was turned. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg Ref: "WHOA! I never saw THIS one in the WWE Gay Kama Sutra!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg Rene was the latest wrestler to discover his ability to manipulate the Butterfly Effect... at least on opponents' hands anyway. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg Dupree unveiled his new Ultimate Warrior 2004 gimmick by bouncing straight up after a Lionsault and a Flashback and then proceeding to gorilla press Jericho onto the canvas. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg Tsk tsk tsk, Jericho. Shoulda taken Immodium AD. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg Teddy Long's new "Gimme soup!" slogan was met with less enthusiasm than his previous "Shoot this guy in the ass!" motto. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg Rico had to be careful when riding a wild Black Hippopatomus. These things could be incredibly unstable... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg ...as seen when this one reared up and tried to attack him. Fortunately, Rico knew that punching one in its weak spot--the mouth--would freak it out and make it run away because it was afraid it wouldn't be able to eat for a while. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg Low sacrifice value or not, Kane was offering SOMEBODY to the Altar of Helmsley!! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg As if Kane's psycho gimmick wasn't already buried enough, fans REALLY started doubting the credibility of his character when he started whispering sweet nothings to Spike Dudley. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg While Test happily continued munching away, Steiner got full after his fifth serving of Goldberg rib. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg All THREE wrestlers' were momentarily distracted when they spotted a shiny penny over by the edge of the ring at the same time. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/16.jpg Well, I guess this answers the age-old question: If two wrestlers as crappy as Steiner and Goldberg got into a match, who would be the one carrying the other? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg Yeah. Definitely Goldberg. OR Steiner takes his chances riding a rare WHITE Hippopatomus. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg Even Austin was getting impatient as the FF X-2 commercial marathon entered its seventh hour. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/24.jpg Having finally gotten directions the previous week, Austin was sure he could make it to Texas without anymore help this time! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg Trish wasn't too impressed when Christian showed her his collection of Trish Stratus cleavage shots he'd stocked up on over the years. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg Long's swimsuit model pose wasn't met with much enthusiasm. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/27.jpg Playboy was so desperate that they hired Jazz as a secret agent to get Lita's clothes off. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/28.jpg Hurricane got really confused when his Ortonbot started flailing around and acting like a monkey. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg I got nothing. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg If Flair could just avoid the Batista trap, the table, and the bumble bees, he just might make it through this jogger's obstacle course. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg Coach gave his guess at how many more Final Fantasy commercials they'd show in the next five minutes. Bubba was less optimistic at so low a number. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/32.jpg Bubba: "I TOLD YOU THERE'D BE SIX MORE!!!!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg Seeing the largest piece of shit ever coming his way, Teddy Long dived for cover. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/34.jpg Orton, Goldberg's new tutor, decided to use a hands-on approach combined with viewing results on the Titantron to teach Goldberg the letters of the alphabet. Not my best, but I'm in a rush and have to get to class. I do a few over later, since some of the pics offer some really good caption opportunities. |
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Ref: Oooooh...so THAT'S where it goes... |
I finally finished mine.
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Matt in a gay like way: I told you like so many times! Don't shout to me in the ring. RVD: But Sugar, It's just a act. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg Rene: I love you baby! When i look at you, I love you baby! Jericho: Stop it,Stop it, I told you i am straight now. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg Evolution came to the ring to have an orgy with Rosey. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg Devon: Your momma is so fat!!! Flair: MOMMA!!!!! :rant: Batista: No, it's a trick, Your momma is fatter then that! |
Meh, I'm bored, so I'll do both sets today..
<img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102102/images/Stl0018.jpg> Hunter's reaction to when he learned Rhyno main-evented SmackDown! the other week. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0001.jpg> One could only imagine what thoughts were going through Hunter's mind. Of course, it's safe to assume Katie Vick's lifeless body had more than him. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0004.jpg> I guess when Flair said he was the "Dirtiest Player in the Game," he meant it, dammit. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0011.jpg> Oddest Sleeper Hold I've ever seen. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/102802/images/Stl0021.jpg> Now Al was pissed. Chris actually tore and wore a United States flag. Chris had no idea to what Al spoke of. To redeem his country, Al simply called Chris out, by calling him a homo. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/010603/images/Stl0001.jpg> While Eric was yelling at and about random RAW workers, Chief Morley began his look hitting on random audience members. <img src=http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/082202/images/Stl0016.jpg> It's sad when Vince actually writes his workers to hang themselves. Even sadder when they can't do that write. <img src=http://smackdown.wwe.com/results/103102/images/Stl0027.jpg> Tajiri was confused. Is Matt Hardy actually botching the Tongan Death Grip?! |
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..and then Matt tripped on his face... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg Booker T must have read the Art of War. While Christian prepared for the Axe Kick, Booker instead jacked him in the jaw with his knee. That crafty Booker. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg And here we see the ref teaching Christian how to play leap frog at Booker's expense. OR This is not what they mean when they say "you went over someone" Christian. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg While Matt took on Booker, the ref made sure those crowd members knew their places. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg When not sure what to do, Matt unleash the oddest headbutt move ever seen. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg Jericho was confused. It almost seemed like Rene was doing DDP's last gimmick...but at the same time, he wasn't. Ah, but the ref should know! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg Wow, Hunter's invisble crucfix now targets anybody for no reason... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg Then it hit Jericho, he'd have to job later that night to Mark Henry. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg Long: I am, getting so hot, I will... *RAW suddenly cuts to commercial* http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg Poor Henry was being held down by talent, until; Charles "The Flash" Robinson came in for the save. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg Rico with a punch to the front teeth, and...wait..wait, no, Henry blocks with his bottom teeth and begins to eat Rico. Okay, I guess that is a first.. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg Kane's reaction to Spike telling him the truth about Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and how Kane should have switched to Geico. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg And then Kane drug Spike's ear to his mouth and whispered the most evil, foul, and vile thing EVER heard by any man: Kane: ..I'm not wearing any underwear! Spike was then sent to the hospital after a severe and odd case of convulsions. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg Proof Steiner has ADD. As soon as they go for a suplex, he spots a random audience member and mistakes them for a bird. Meanwhile, Test has troubles trying to figure out how to carry Gorillaberg. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg Goldberg and Steiner both got enraged when the camera-man bad mouthed Americans. Test just laughed it off, mustly at the fact that the man said "African," and neither Scott or Bill understood it. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/16.jpg Where will you be when your diarrhea acts up? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg Notice the tricky ref going in for that leg sweep. Not only will it break Steiner's legs and back, but it'll cause Steiner to break Goldberg's neck. This ref was taught WELL by Hunter. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg Austin: Okay, now, I have been told we are NOT in Texas. Which confuses me as hell, because someone told me there was a Milwaukee around here... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/24.jpg Holy hell, Austin's Time ATV ACTUALLY works!...wait...wait no...that's a green screen...nevermind.. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg Xtian: And this was when we stole that lawn gnome from Kane's yard... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg Because of Lita, Long's face turn was finished, complete with the "Please don't kiss the bald guy" gimmick. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/27.jpg HA HA! Rhyno STRIKES again! AHAHA! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/28.jpg Look at Orton's right leg! His right leg is giving out! His quad is tearing! He's pulling a Kevin Nash! HA! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg This scene would have made a GREAT showdown pic...then you see the ref trying to be Waldo there in the background... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg It's lucky Batista was there to get Flair and hold him back. Ric didn't like people messing up the YMCA dance. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg Once again, we turn on the Randy Orton Telepathetic Helmet to clue in on the thoughts of our favorite black guys...and Coach! Coach: I feel like an Elvis impersonator.. D-Von: ...you put your right foot in, and then you shake it all about... Bubba: Well if Coach can do this and have good mic skills, then it should work for me.. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/32.jpg And Bubba with the eye poke through Coach's glasses... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg It's sad when Long has to hold a pose of horror and Orton has to help Mark with his first attempt at a flying cross body block on Long.. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/34.jpg Bill liked his new hat. Safe to say, Orton and his currently high pitced voice didn't take kindly to their new status. |
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Side note, are the wrinkles on Trish's right (our left) breast in just the right place to make a WWF logo, or is it just me? |
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After seeing sheriff Austin riding around on his Atv deputy Rico decided its time that he gets a cool set of wheels http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg unfortunatly Ricos was a transformer |
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My favorites so far (yeah, there's a lot, but...who cares?):
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Matt, "Now What" Rob, "Now just think lovely thoughts" Matt, "Nothing's happening Rob" Rob, "I don't know it worked yesterday in my basement." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg When seeing Booker T trying to bring back The Nation, HHH quickly signaled for an emergency Kamehameha attack to put a quick stop to this uprising. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg Christian, "Look it goes through one ear and out the other." Ref, "Holy Crap, what a trick." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg Ref, "OK come on Christian, trick's over, put that thing away." Matt, "Christian, one more time." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg The Ref was able to catch Matt's honarable attempt at a sunset flip as he awoke from his nap. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg At least somebody is bowing down to the King of The World. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg "Jesus 'Rene Dupree' Christ prepares to do the impossible and raise the dead. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg Hebner, "....I even swore on my wife and kids that I wasn't in on it." Dupree, "Okay Earl we know" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg Even Teddy Long had to punch himself in the face a couple of times during a Mark Henry match. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg WWE's live action Mark Henry mechanical bull ride was a hot seller on Shopzone. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg Kudos to Spike at doing an Ultimate Warrior impression while being chocked by kane. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg Kane was so confused as to where his huge push went, he starts looking through Spike's head. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg Test, "Scott, suplex on five." Scott, "One. Two. Three......Oh shit what's next http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg Steiner shows Goldberg how to 'Walk the Dog' with his yo-yo. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg Nice Half-Assed Steiner Recliner Scott. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg Austin, "Wait, and go slow this time, A Cruiserweight is a what? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg Before thier match, wrestlers were now forced to watch the HHH-Michaels match from Raw a couple of weeks ago via mobile phone in order to learn the correct way on how to sell for best friends. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg I guess somebody's been guzzling down those YJ Stingers. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg Flair was confused as he didn't realize the WWE started letting fans take part in matches if they came in costume. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg While Devon was mesmorized by Coach's rendition of "I Have a Dream," Bubba protested the speech by throwing up Nazi signs. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg Teddy Long coudln't bare to watch Mark Henry preform a 619. |
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Rene Dupree unveiled a new, quirkier dimension to his character as he turned and farted in the cameraman's general direction. Quote:
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Rob knew he should have been paying attention, but someone in the crowd was doing the naked fan dance... http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg Christian: "Dude, Booker, the ref's checkin' out your ass." Booker: "WHHHAAAATTT?!?!?" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg And tonight, on a very special RAW, we find out if Booker T is really Shaniqua in a really unconvincing disguise. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg The plan backfires, and suddenly the whole world realizes that Christian is a shapeshifter! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg Ref: "Oh, man, that blow knocked me out. I was unconscious for, like, three minutes there. That's never happened before. Heh. Now back to the matc- ... OH MY GOD!!!!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg Jericho was flattered by the proposal, but ... what would Trish say? http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg As Renee brags about the size of his package, Jericho collapses to the ground in astonishment. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg Ref: "I'm afraid it's true, Renee. You have a bald spot developing right here." Renee: *Le sob* http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg "Wool jacket in a heated auditorium. What was I thinking?" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg Mark Henry may be a poor wrestler, but he was fast for a big guy. During the first "WWE Man vs. Man-Beast Invitational", he and his jockey Rico lead the race while the speed-walking ref is left behind in the dust. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg Mark Henry: "Mmmm.. Rico... did you have chicken tenders for lunch?" Rico: "How did you... Ugghhhhh, GROSS!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg The minute Spike unleashed his Supersonic Girly Scream, Kane knew that it was only a matter of seconds before he would succumb. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg After his massive de-push, Glenn Jacobs was sadly forced to take a side job as head lice inspector. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg It was all Test and Steiner could do to help the drunken, disoriented Goldberg out of the ring. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg Test and Goldberg calmly wait while Scott re-inflates his right arm. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg Scott: "Oh, no... no one does the 'Running Man' in my ring!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg "So, let me get this straight. When the big hand is on the three and the little hand is on the six, it's... no, one tell me, I can figure it out...." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/24.jpg The whole "Austin's too injured for the active roster" angle went too far when they had Austin go to the grocery in a motorized shopping cart. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg Christian: "It's soooo cool! It lets you take pictures and send email and surf the ... What the hell!?!??! Final Fantasy X-2?!?!?!" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg Teddy knew he should be saying something about "racism" or "putting the man down", but ... he was getting manhandled by Lita. That wasn't something any heterosexual male should complain about. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/27.jpg The ladies were blissfully unaware that they were being ogled by that quintissential pervert, Slimy the Worm. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/28.jpg Hurricane admitted that it did look fun, but the hokey-pokey was just not his thing. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg Flair: "Holy Jesus! You guys are still stuck in those dead-end gimmicks?" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg Randy tried to get Naitch out of the ring, but to no avail: there was no escape from the seductive siren call of the YMCA. http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg Coach: "Weeee... are the champions.... my frie-end...." D-Von: "Goddamn, where can I get me one of them kicky berets?" http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/32.jpg Bubba: "Give me a second, D-Von. Hmmm... looks like a Tommy Hillfiger." http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg Teddy would never live down the day when he blew out the nastiest booger on national television. |
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While Matt Hardy was showing off his Version 1.0 taunt, Rob was eyeing the cotton candy, wishing that Rhyno would come over to ease his munchies. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/02.jpg> Okay, we all know the match sucked, but did the ref have to kick the WWE logo? <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/03.jpg> Could someone please tell the ref that right now is not the best time to practice his “Stuck In A Box” mime routine? <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/04.jpg> And the guest ref for this match, Billy, Zack Gowen’s best friend! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/05.jpg> Worst. Springboard Powerbomb. Ever. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/06.jpg> Rene: Please, time out! It itches! It itches! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/07.jpg> Poor Rene doesn’t understand the American sense of humor. The “Shoot That Man In The Ass” joke only works when you’re pointing to someone’s ass! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/08.jpg> Jericho had to hold Rene in place for the staring contest against the ref. Needless to say, much like the French do, Rene didn’t even try. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg> After all of Mark Henry’s no sell last week to The Walls Of Jericho, Teddy Long had to do SOMETHING to make the fans think that someone is hurt. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg> The new “Ride Me Henry” action figure did not go over well. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg> No! Rico! Don’t! If you punch him in the mouth, he’ll eat your hand! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/12.jpg> Spike: Oh my god! I’m getting elevated! Kane: Any “Kane Is Holding Up Talent” jokes will be answered with a swift throw to the ground… <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg> Kane took great pride in making his “Spikebot.” He was so proud he had to build it at ringside. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg> Test: Damn it Scott! Why aren’t you lifting? Scott: I think my arm just sprung a leak!! Goldberg: Yeah, he did. I could feel the koolaid run down my head. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/15.jpg> Somehow Scott knew that Test and Goldberg didn’t quite do the battering ram right… |
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Do I make the “Holding up talent” or “Keeping Goldberg down” joke.. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/22.jpg> No, this wasn’t part of the match. The ref got his own Shoe commercial, but no one saw it because they left the room when the FFX2 commercial came on. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg> Austin, still with his WWE tattoo from last week, has no idea that the little kid behind him knows who Tugboat is. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/24.jpg> No one really knew how to respond to Austin’s new black and white Mohawk… <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/25.jpg> (based on real life) Christan: See! It’s a line, and you have to get the dots! Every time you get a dot, the line grows, and you can’t stop the line! Yeah, my cell phone games rule! Trish: If this is your way you try to impress women, then I hope you have a lot of hand lotion… <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/26.jpg> Teddy Long always wanted to have a white girl all over her, but since Lita let her beard grow out… <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/27.jpg> There’s nothing sexual here. It’s just Jazz, loading the ass cannon. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/28.jpg> Randy’s Ric Flair strut was so bad that The Hurricane had to jump out of the ring. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/29.jpg> Naich: I’m sorry Rosey, but Evolution has to take you out. Rosey: Why? Naich: Because even though you and The Hurricane are pretty much jobbers, you’re still over. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/30.jpg> To make sure Evolution didn’t try anything funny, Bubba Ray and D-Von decided to 3D the invisible man as a warning shot. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/31.jpg> D-Von: 3D or Wedgie… 3D or Wedgie… <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/32.jpg> Needless to say that was the biggest fu</>ckin’ wedgie, through a table ever. To add insult to injury, Bubba flicked the Coach in the ear a few times. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg> Randy’s newest gimmick is being a wrestling historian. First he talks about the wrestlemania where Hulk Hogan and The Warrior fought, and then he takes it one step farther by becoming Duke “The Dumpster” Drose, as he takes out the trash. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/34.jpg> Even Goldberg makes a sacrifice to the Altar of Helmsley. |
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<img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/10.jpg> <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/11.jpg> The Bad News: Seems Rico, Mark Henry, and Scott Steiner do not have any clue how to do a camel clutch. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/23.jpg> The Good News: Steve Austin publicly apologized for wasting everyone’s time with his segments on the new WWE cd. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/14.jpg> And the heavens opened up to enlighten Scott Steiner… Steiner: It’s a suplex!!!! <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/09.jpg> It’s kinda sad when people make a cell phone that fits in your first. <img src=http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/13.jpg> Spike: My face! My face! Stop ripping at my face! Kane: Not until I take off your mask so Scooby and the gang knows who took my push! |
:y: up to Corkey, Fryza and Loopy your captions rule!
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and this was when you were in the shower... |
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RVD: Simon Says touch your eyes. Simon Says Pat your head. Simon Says Touch your nose. Put your hands in the air! or... Matt Hardy: I AM THEEE GREAT CORNHOLIO! I NEED TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE! http://raw.wwe.com/results/011904/images/33.jpg Ref: Down...set...HUT! [Couple Seconds Later] Teddy Long: No Good! Incomplete. |
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