JBL: ...and that's why I gave up a career in proctology to become a wrestler.
JILLIAN/EVERYONE: Ewwwwwwwwwww!
Alas, old habits die hard.
And the day that he got to play in the Big Boy Ring was the happiest day of Rey's life.
In preparation for the 2006 Invisible Olympics, the Cabinet perfected their Synchronized Rings routine.
Buckwheat would always remember what he was doing the day he found out that Alfalfa was murdered.
Next time someone tells you that narcolepsy and wrestling don't mix...they're right!
BATISTA: Nooooo!
JBL: That was a good tackle, Dave. But the "no" could use some work. Now, give me 50 laps around the arena.
BATISTA: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
JBL: Better.
REY: Hey, why is your mouth open. WHY IS YOUR MOUTH OPEN?!?
Surprised it took this long for JBL to see that side of Jillian's face.
Sleepboxing is always dangerous. Particularly when you're not alone.
Dave and Rey do their impression of "WWE Rookie Initiation."
It's rare for someone's mutant ability to emerge during a wrestling match. Perhaps this is why OJ's Optic Blasts only came out as red and blue dots.
REY: Come on! I've got you in a headlock! Sell iiiiiiiiit! Please?
RANDY: Dad, I hate this store. Are you
sure that Hot Topic is the only place we can find it?
While Undertaker's mind games went a bit too far when he killed Skippy, Randy's pet hamster, the burial ceremony was surprisingly moving.
Okay, I was never a big Tori fan, but this pose was
way sexier when she and X-Pac would do it.
In the grand tradition of Men on a Mission and John Cena, WWE introduces Run-RKO!
BOB: Okay. The good news is Big Show's toilet isn't clogged anymore...
RANDY: Oh, hey, Josh. Josh?
RANDY: Oh, my God! The White Witch has been here!
BOOKER: I... I was just playin' with 'im. An'... An' his neck broke!
Chris Benoit drew the biggest pop of the night when he pulled the invisible carpet out from under Booker T.
In yet another example of WWE Stereotype Theatre, Bobby Lashley's match comes to a grinding halt when he chokes on a chicken bone.
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More to come later.