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Kurt Angle is so bald he was mistaken for the national bird.
Mark Henry is so boring even the dust won't settle on him.
Austin is so drunk he once fell off the floor.
Scott Steiner is so roided up that dealers tap his veins in his sleep.
Eric Bischoff uses so much hair dye that Crayola has to stop making black crayons.
Rey Mysterio is so small he sled-rides on Fritos.
...and goes rafting on inflated condoms.
Trish Stratus is so 'augmented' that she's like a Cheerio: you can't sink her.
Kevin Nash is so clumsy that he tore his quad stepping into the ring.
...wait, that really happened. Never mind.
Mae Young is so old her social security number is 6.
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