The first ever WWE/Nickelodeon SLIME TIME MATCh was ratings.
The Riverdancing lessons were NOT going well with the men...
Same with the ladies...
Despite his expertise in practically everything, even Kurt Angle had a helluva time trying to frame the John Cena EZ-Use Camera in the right position for that perfect photo shot.
What Daivari didn't know was that Cena could call upon the attack ticks that lived on his right shoulder to swarm his opponents at will.
Daivari knew replacing the other side of the chair with a mirror would be a great idea. Cena could see his true self, then commit suicide when he realized he was a homophobic, poop rapping face everyone hated.
KING: "In short, never put a steel chair on a table and tell Big Show it's a hamburger."
BIG SHOW: "RRRRROAAARRR!!! I thought I could eat it!!!!"
You know WWE programming is bad when even the superstars are trying to destroy the TV.
Hunter's plan worked perfectly. Show would punch the chair and inadvertantly get himself sucked into the wormhole HHH had manufactured on its face. Eggcellent...
You know the WWE's new drug policy ain't working when even Mr. Socko shows up to work seriously over-roided.
HHH's Bedtime Stories, featuring Mr. Fluffy, where a huge hit with Mr. McMahon.
Vince shows off his new "how to finger a girl with three orifices" hand-pose. Take that, Matt Hardy!
Vince and the camera mic moved closer. It was love at first sight, and that first kiss would be sensuous...
KANE: "Dammit, these born-again Christian Jehovah's Witnesses never go away."
Nothing to see here. Just a previous gimmick flash back for Kane Yankem, DDS.
VINCE: "Is it... talking???"
The new WWE Groping Match was a huge success.
It's great that Torrie doesn't want Chloe to suddenly attack everyone and all, but looping a string through the dog's nose to pacify her was a little too extreme...
Flair loved reading Shakespeare while getting dry-humped by a slut in the morning.
Actually... Flair loved getting dry-humped period.
LPD: "You call that an angry face..."
LITA: Oh no! I left the oven on!!!
Mickie James' new role as FCC Censor was not so hotly received.
WWE Films presents: Alfred Hitchkcock's LEZBO PSYCHO!!!
MAMA: "Hold on, you got some lettuce stuck in your teeth."
SHELTON: "MOM!!!"
The WWE reached new lows when they re-enacted the Rodney King beating.
LAWLER: Cringe all you want, Greg, but we've got to get this Babelfish in your ear if you're to understand all the various lanugages we'll encounter as we travel around the galaxy...