After the fifth hour passed, it became apparent that Edge and Lita weren't merely bad promo'ers with robotic personalities, they were actually robots!
Cena further cements his "with me or against me" persona by calling all smarks homos.
Edge couldn't concentrate. He'd just remembered that Lita had left the oven on.
Kane's new Silver Surfer gimmick was certainly the most awesome thing ever.
KANE: Dammit, these Carlito Sandals are the absolute worst.
Kane's attempt to look into the future with the Magic 8-Chair was a bit senseless.
REF: Who will never rise above the glass ceiling? That's right... YOU!!!
It wasn't that Kane had sat up that was freaking Carlito out, it was the fact that he had somehow become convinced that he was a five-time five-time five-time five-time five-time world champion.
In a shocking twist, JBL reveals the leader of his Aryan Nation.
Richards clocked HBK with a drop kick. Benjamin hit him from behind. It was the perfect plan of attack.
MOMMA: "Oooooooh, boy, you didn't eat enough Chunky Soup!"
As a final nail to the career coffin, Shelton was subjected to having his momma rub his boo boo and kiss it, live on TV.
In a sudden swerve, HBK turns Catholic and pretends Shelton is a choir boy...
Try as they did, neither Lita nor Edge could get Bilbo to wake up and go on another journey.
If rumors of Fit Finlay's homosexuality weren't effective enough, having his own yell leaders put the icing on the cake.
The cheerer's efforts were all for naught, as they learned after a fan mentioned that the Notre Dame / USC game had transpired three months ago--and Notre Dame had lost.
The most incredulous thing wasn't that a non-wrestler was going to the Rumble, it was that Jerome Bettis had lost that much weight!
Coach always took time at the end of the day for a nice long session of pleasurable self-groping.
KING: I don't get it... there's no 'Y' in 'Coach.' None at all!!
Ashley shows tremendous talent riding her invisible skateboard up the Victoria quarterpipe.
HLA, as brought to you through....
INTERPRETIVE DANCE!!!
Mickie was a mantisssssss, and there was no way anyone was stopping her from destroying Assssshley!!!!!
TRISH: So if John leaves Point A going east at 25 miles per hour, and Larry leaves Point B going west at 40 miles per hour, and A & B are 100 miles apart, when
will they meet together??? ...hmph.
Big Show was so large that this was the only effective way to apply the Heimlich Maneuver on him once he started choking.
Greg Helms hated it when the other guys played Slap Ping Pong with him.
There was something different about Show, HHH noted. He seemed a lot... bigger.
John Cena fails at using the Force.
John Cena botches being Spiderman.
Little known fact: chopping a hoss is a less messy way of causing yourself to orgasm.
The Masters field goal kick is up... and it's GOOD!!!!!
The pain from the STFU Masters could endure, but when Cena broke out into a solo from one of Kevin Federline's songs, Chris had no choice but to tap out.
It was not a pretty sight when Edge suffered a massive hernia live on TV.