RAW [1-23-2006] (Continued)
Corkscrewed:
Kane's attempt to look into the future with the Magic 8-Chair was a bit senseless.
REF: Who will never rise above the glass ceiling? That's right... YOU!!!
As a final nail to the career coffin, Shelton was subjected to having his momma rub his boo boo and kiss it, live on TV.
In a sudden swerve, HBK turns Catholic and pretends Shelton is a choir boy...
Try as they did, neither Lita nor Edge could get Bilbo to wake up and go on another journey.
KING: I don't get it... there's no 'Y' in 'Coach.' None at all!!
Ashley shows tremendous talent riding her invisible skateboard up the Victoria quarterpipe.
HLA, as brought to you through....
INTERPRETIVE DANCE!!!
Mickie was a mantisssssss, and there was no way anyone was stopping her from destroying Assssshley!!!!!
TRISH: So if John leaves Point A going east at 25 miles per hour, and Larry leaves Point B going west at 40 miles per hour, and A & B are 100 miles apart, when
will they meet together??? ...hmph.
There was something different about Show, HHH noted. He seemed a lot... bigger.
Impact!:
Who would have known hiding behind the chair would actually work
Even though Kane had beat him in the qualifying round, Carlito still knew that he wouldn't last much longer as the ref announced his opponent...the "Almight" GOD
Disturbed316:
Thanks to new computer technology, we are able to see what Hitler would have looked like at the grand old age of 76.
Hoppy Macgee: S-P-I-R-I-T *gasps* S-Q-U-A-D!
Sir Standaround: Wow, I have new found respect for Scotty.
Vastardikai:
Lita: What's Wrong, Baby?
Adam: I just.... Swallowed... a Bug.
King: So THAT'S what happened to Hassan!
Trish Launches off of Victoria's Boob to take out the Cameraman with a Pescado.
Big Show chooses an odd time to do the Time Warp.
Blitz:
Shawn and Shelton learn a hard lesson. When Mama Benjamin has gas, get the hell out of the way.
WWE Films suprises everyone by revealing they're new gay porn division.
Lita botches Phrenology
It was all going swimmingly, until Jeter tripped over a loose floor panel, and suddenly the Spirit Squad had the worst debut since the Shockmaster.
Big Show learns a hard lesson: Never get in the way of three wrestlers doing the Hokey Pokey.
Lock Jaw:
Cena: Hello friends. Do you wish to sound as happy as me? Well then send $1 to ... me.
Lita: Hey... hey.... the title's not spinning!
Edge:
.... It's on the other shoulder......
Kane's new gimmick, the seven foot tall Big Red Can-Can Dancer. Just don't get in his way.
Fryza:
In a world without love, and criminals run the street, only one story of one heoric man will stand out.
This is neither that story nor is this that man.
Worst. Peakaboo. Ever.
Does he know where he's at? Does he know who he is? Well, he may have Alzheimer's, but at least he doesn't have Alzheimer's.
Invisible trip-wire. Steven Richards was getting smarter.
And the Hulk Hogan-Pose-A-Thon was off to a bad start...
Hunter: "Yeah, that's excellent, but can you PLEASE but it back in your tights?"
SmackDown! [1-27-2006]
wwe2222:
At the expiration of his 10 year contract, Mark Henry simply exploded.
Vastardikai:
Despite being "Big name Models," MNM cannot hail a cab in this town for NOTHING.
At the Smackdown Subway, a patron is confused as a couple of other passengers use a Kurt Angle Battering Ram.
Mark Henry's farts can clear rings and make ring announcers BALD.
*Randy looks at the Trashcan lid mirror*
Randy: Yep, still good looking!
Finlay brings new meaning to the term Fighting Irish. He has no time for the referee's Lex Luger impression.
Where will YOU be when Sean O'haire's toilet breaks.
Cole: And REY BREAKS UP the Undertaker impression! That could have ended it RIGHT THERE!
The ref cleverly disguises how he threw up in his mouth just a little bit.