#1: "Chillin"
Translation:
I am a loser because I am sitting at home, alone, on the computer. However, I don't want to be that explicit in my answer, because it may cause me to become less popular than I am now. Therefore, I will say that I am "chillin," because that is a hip way of saying "relaxing," which is one of the things I am doing. I'll conveniently leave out the fact that I am doing this at home, alone, on the computer.