Well, my column isn't up on 411mania, hell, I dunno if it will be. I'm having a few doubts, but that could just be me being paranoid.
Anyway:
LAST WEEK:
Matt Cappoteli and John Hennigan fought the OVW Southern Tag Team Champions Nova and The Idol (w/ Trudy DeNucci). Hennigan was angry at Cappoteli’s amount of singles matches recently and left him behind to get a beat down. Standing Thunder ran in to be his tag team partner and to defeat the OVW Southern Tag Team Champs by DQ when Trudy broke up a pin after the Thunderclap. Trudy caught a scoop slam afterwards.
Max Impact formed a new stable called the Team Players with Mark Magnus, Nick Dinsmore (OVW Champ and leader), Nikita, and The Troubleshooters (Chris Masters and Brent Albright). The Troubleshooters won their match against Seth Skyfire and Mac Johnson.
OVW Title Match: Nick Dinsmore defeated The Damaja (WWE’s Danny Basham) when Magnus interfered. Afterwards, Johnny Jeter ran in and got taken out by Dinsmore and this resulted in a large brawl with the battle lines drawn. Rob Conway joins the Team Players. Damaja suggests a match for March Mayhem (2 hr. OVW Special March 6th) with Nick Dinsmore/Mark Magnus/Rob Conway vs. Johnny Jeter/The Damaja/Doug Basham.
Now THIS WEEK:
YOUR Commentators: Jim Cornette and Dean Hill.
Match 1: Mike Mondo (w/ Bolin Services) defeats Seth Skyfire when Seth Skyfire misses a top-rope leg drop and Mike Mondo rolls him up and grabs the tights.
Notable Spots: It was all Seth Skyfire here as far as interesting spots go. He hit a springboard elbow, springboard enzuguri, and that beautiful missed top-rope leg drop finish.
Rating: ***1/2 It’s purpose was to make Mike Mondo appear as a big player in Bolin Services, and it did that well enough as far as storyline purposes went. The rest of the rating was all Seth Skyfire. I love this dude. If he were a woman, he would have my babies.
They recap Tough Enough’s (Matt Cappoteli and John Hennigan) problems from last week.
Jim Cornette is in the ring to conduct an interview with Matt Cappoteli. He says that he isn’t a glory hound, he just fought the Disciples of Synn in matches was because they broke his hand. He just wanted revenge. He says that he wants John Hennigan in the ring to talk it out like men. Out comes Hennigan, complete with his new cocky heel dance. He says he’s the best in OVW and better than most in the WWE, and that it’s Matt Cappoteli’s fault for him not being in the WWE right now. The crowd seems to think this is bullshit. Matt Cappoteli officially splits up Tough Enough. As Cappoteli turns to leave the ring, he is jumped by Hennigan and receives a piledriver. Cornette confirms that it is an illegal move.
Commercial. Meet “Handsome” Jimmy Valliant live and in person. SIGN ME UP.
When we return from commercial, Stevie Richards comes to the ring and challenges Hennigan to a match.
Match 2: John Hennigan defeated Stevie Richards when Joey Matthews came out (w/ coffee) and threw the coffee in Richards’s face, allowing Hennigan to get the low blow and rollup.
Notable Spots: Hennigan continued his cocky dance on the way to the ring (again) and during the match. Hennigan attempted the Stevieplex. Richards reversed it into one of his own. When Hennigan went out of the ring to stall, Stevie jumped through the ropes with a cool ass flying kick. Stevie used a mop and “washed” Hennigan’s face.
Rating: **** This was just awesome stuff for OVW, but the constant stalling threw me out of the match a bit.
Commercial. According to this commercial, The Undertaker will rise in 1 week at the Kentucky Custom Auto Show.
Recap of the Team Players forming.
Funaki comes to the ring to make his OVW debut, when John Lauranitis and Max Impact come to the ring. Lauranitis makes Funaki leave the ring so they can have some interview time. Getting rid of Funaki, heel heat from the marks on up. Lauranitis says to put on our listening caps, and therefore makes me giggle like a schoolgirl. He says if anyone wants to work for the WWE, they have to obey his rules. He calls Cornette from the announcer’s position. Lauranitis says that if Jim Ross gets onto him again about OVW, he’ll shut it down. Impact gets on the mic and says Cornette has no power over what they are going to do to OVW. He says Cornette encourages disrespect of Lauranitis. From now on, the Team Players are the power. Impact says everyone has to prove themselves to the Team Players, and those who don’t, will rot in OVW forever. Jim Cornette tries to respond, but Impact grabs him but cannot do anything before SEAN O’HAIRE (w/black and blue hair) comes out. Impact and O’Haire have a stare down. O’Haire says he is here as Jim Ross’s OVW Inspector, just as Impact is Lauranitis’s. He says he’s going to keep his eyes on Max Impact.
Commercial. That segment was the bee’s knees y’all.
Cornette and Dean Hill are in the ring with the McMahon Fire Dept. about the Crusade for Children Slamfest. Cornette presents a check for $2100.42. I have more money than that in pocket change. Oh wait, no I don’t. If I did, I could afford a ****ing stopwatch. Cornette says there is an extra $24 in there that was paid for Billy Gunn slapping Nikita. Cornette announces that next week on OVW TV, EDGE makes his OVW debut with a major announcement.
Commercial.
They recap Last Week’s Main Event.
Backstage Mark Magnus, Nick Dinsmore, Nikita, and Venus talk about tonight’s match against Adrenaline (Chris Cage and Tank Toland). During the interview, Dinsmore messes with his shirt constantly, and then takes it off and demands Venus (sent by Lauranitis as a gift to do whatever Dinsmore wants) Venus to go wash it. Nikita says to wash it good, or else.
March Mayhem Rundown – This is what we know thus far. In a RAW vs. Smackdown challenge, OVW alumni Randy Orton and John Cena will compete against each other. We will also have the Team Players vs. Jeter/Damaja/Basham. Oh yeah, and Jimmy Valliant’s retirement ceremony. The two matches already announced make me happier than Jimmy Valiant ever did.
Match 3: Nick Dinsmore and Mark Magnus (w/ Nikita) defeated Adrenaline when Toland was distracted by Impact and was hit with the Finishing Touch by Magnus for the pinfall victory.
Notable Spots: A nice looking double backdrop by Adrenaline on Magnus. There was also a cool inverted facebuster by Tank on Magnus. From now on, every time Magnus uses the Finishing Touch, it will be in here.
Rating: ** It barely served the purpose of the storyline, as Adrenaline got too much offense in to really make it look like the Team Players were a big threat. Some neat stuff though.
After the match: Dinsmore, Magnus, and Impact attack Adrenaline. Sean O’Haire runs in and clears the ring of the Team Players and he celebrates with Adrenaline afterward.
Overall: Great show with some nice matches, but the Main Event was kind of a letdown, because I know Dinsmore and Magnus can do better. There are lots of WWE guys coming down to OVW, so I know they are going to be on the card for March Mayhem, which makes me happy.
If any of you want OVW TV shows or large shows, go to
www.ovwrestling.com. You can order the events, as well as OVW shows by the month or year.
Next Week:
EDGE!