Cena: "Thank you everybody... WE LOVE YOU MICHIGAN STATE!"
Offscreen: "Uh... we're in New Jersey."
Announcer: "Wanna get away?"
Rhyno's scheme worked to perfection when Cena's hand got stuck to his neck, putting himself in a personal cobra clutch and giving Rhyno the win via submission.
Heyman was actually Noble's half-sister's uncle's youngest grandson's cousin's father, so this was nothing awkward for him.
With Magnifico the Fairy by Rey Mysterio's side, there was no way he could lose!
Rey learned his lesson: NEVER steal Jamie's watch and wear it as your own.
Tajiri: "YES! I WON!"
Charles Robinson: "What are you doing? You're just having one of those in-match dreams again!"
Tajiri: "So I DIDN'T win the Cruiserweight Title?"
Charles Robinson: "No. Now go back to cleaning O'Haire's cage."
Tajiri:
Akio obviously wasn't completely clear about the concept of a Heimlich Maneuver.
Mid-match, Rey tried to grab onto the Giant Sky Wrench and pull himself out of the depushed land of Cruiserweights, but to no avail.
OR
Rey should get that Noble-Growing-Out-Of-My-Assitis condition looked at.
After a while, Eddie's constant bragging about having the world's biggest chocolate belt got kind of annoying.
The master behind the hypnocam is revealed. Look into his eyes... you seek... the future...
Shelton had taken care of business. Now he waited for the Wrestlemania XX Anvil to finish the job.
Haas does his best Chris Webber impression, calling a timeout when there aren't any.
Big Show was in a hurry to get to his match, so he just grabbed a snack on the run.
Meanwhile, Cheech busied himself doing the hustle.
Big Show knew he was supposed to be a relentless and merciless monster, but he wasn't so sure how he felt about chokeslamming a naked guy who was apparently happy to see him...
And there is the look of a man who has seen his meal of moose walk away.
Rikishi: "You're sure that allowing the WWE Genetic's Lab to splice us together into Siamese twins will allow us another six months as tag champs, right?"
Scotty: "Of course! I even got Triple H's personally verbal guarantee!"
Rikishi: ....
Yeah, Rikishi and Scotty had gotten so stale they were even putting their opponents to sleep.
Danny didn't know what was happening. With Rikishi and Scotty trying to re-enact Michaelangelo's "Birth of Man" and Brian Hebner trying to hang ten, it seemed that everyone had forgotten there was an actual match still going on.
The ATV is such a nice, selfless guy. Always willing to put other people like Brock Lesnar over.
All the wrestlers were understandably shocked when Paul Heyman announced that Triple H had bought the souls of all the SmackDOWN! superstars as well.
They weren't too pleased when Stone Cold came to collect either.
Austin: "All right, ya maggots. Form a line and ya each got one minute to convince me not to let Hunter bury you!"
Palumbo: "Please, Austin..."
Gunn: "Yeah, Steve, we're pals..."
Morgan: "I'm too young to get buried..."
A-Train: "I can help Hunter..."
Austin was shocked when his secret gay lover confronted him live on national television.
The Civil War angle began when Big Show, the U.S. Champion, was challenged by a renegade confederate.
Big Show: "You just punked out the entire SmackDOWN! roster! How'd you do it?"
Austin: "Why, Evolution Kool-Aid of course! You can do anything with Evolution Kool-Aid, and it now comes in new Blue
bury Blast and Glass Ceiling Grape!"
The future NFL'er and the future Pro Deer Hunter embraced in a tender and touching final farewell.
Here, Austin shows off his future hunting technique by shining a bright light to freeze the deer in the middle of the path before shooting it with his rifle.
Heyman: "Don't go after him! It's not the time!"
Lesnar: "But He Hate Me!"
Heyman:
Brock faced an interesting predicament when he caught himself on the internet scouting potential NFL teams.
OR
The truth was revealed. It wasn't because he wanted to try out in the NFL that Brock wouldn't be on WWE programming after Wrestlemania, Sean O'Haire had actually sniped him and stolen his push!
Austin: "Shoot this man in the ass!"
Offscreen: "Um... it's already happened... and he got shot in the head."
Austin: "Gimme another beer then!"
JR: "STUNNER PEDIGREE BEER BROKEN IN HALF BBQ SAUCE!!!"
So confused by the recent rumors of Goldberg and Lesnar leaving or not, Austin drank himself into a slumbery stupor.
OR
Austin enraged Lesnar when he cruelly opened up and consumed both Bubbly AND Tasty!