When the arena suddenly started to shake and collapse, Angle knew he shouldn't have gloated about stealing the treasures of the Temple of Doom.
Big Show: "C'mon! You call that a tug?"
Rikishi: "Damn Rhyno and his late going away presents!!!"
Rikishi was used to taking big dumps, but pooping out the Big Show was an incredible feat even for him.
The Reincarnated Rematch between Davy Crockett and General Santa Ana proved to be a little lopsided on the American's side...
The consumate heel that he was, Chavo beheaded Mysterio AND gloated about it.
To add more heel heat to Bradshaw, the SmackDOWN! writers appointed Bradshaw official Invisible Crucifix nailer.
Brian Hebner eyed the bar. This would be his greatest limbo challenge yet!
Rob's mother always warned him to stop dry-humping metal poles before he got hurt...
Haas: "You talk to Rhyno before you left?"
RVD: "Yeah."
Haas: "Dammit, going away AND coming in presents!!!"
And suddenly, Haas realized the color of his trunks.
RVD and the ref argued into the night, but controversy or not, Haas had won the invisible lightsaber.
Holly: "You sonofabitch! You stole my push! I was main eventing just three months ago, and now I'm in midcard hell!"
Booker: "Listen sucka, I'm better than you. I have better moves than you. I have more heat than you. Fans love to hate me. I have every-- hey sucka, look at me when I'm talking to ya!"
Holly: "Sorry, I was captivated by your beautiful hair..."
Booker:
Holly: "Where that push??? Is it here???"
Holly: "Or is it here??? TELL ME!!!! Oh shit, I got pinned again."
Long: "The Man is holding down the brotha. See, D-Von, you didn't even notice that Bubba borrowed some of Rhyno's crazy glue to paste a thermal detonator onto your cheek."
Cena was pointing to the fine young lady sitting ringside, so he was a bit confused when he noticed Brian Hebner checking Michael Cole out instead.
Here, Johnny Stamboli does his best "Sacramento Kings as the season winds down" impression.
[Insert Forrest Gump/Lt. Dan joke here]
Cena: "Hey Renee, how come YOU get to hang out with Stephanie?"
The depush of Eddie Guerrero began as he was appointed Official SmackDOWN! Boogers Inspector.
Arriving at the arena late, Bradshaw reflected that taking that detour literally through the cattle ranch might not have been a good idea.
Poor Al Gore. Look what he's been reduced to: giving speeches by the side of the road while trying to hitchhike.
"And with our Commander in Chief George W. Bush financing the operation, the Border Patrol Stable will VANQUISH you MEXiCANS!!!"
As if being Booger Inspector wasn't humiliating enough, the writers had to make Eddie play a giant game of Whack-A-Mole!
"Y-y-y-you're... a-a-a-a homo!"
Wearing JR's hat had interesting side effects.
"Piedra fria! Piedra fria! Maravilla! Salsa de Barbeque caballo cerveza Austin!!!!"
The side effects also proved, once and for all, that JR did indeed talk from his ass.
Damn Flair for telling Eddie that hat was really an oddly shaped white flour tortilla!
"2 gallons... 3 gallons..."
"No! Not Florida!"
"...TEN gallons!!!"
"And.... tada!! Steven Richards CAN spin upside down breakdance style!"
OR
The chase was on, and this week at least, Eddie ended up with the upper hand over the WWE Champion, White Cowboy Hat.
OR
After making some doves magically appear from the hat, Eddie unveiled his final trick: making marijuana DISAPPEAR INTO the hat!