My Guarantee: These will not good.
Ric Flair's new gimmick, St. Ric or "Flairnta Claus" debuted by using his powers to produce his giant candy cane, and used it as a weapon against Benjamin.
While Ric knew deep down he could counter Benjamin's new "Blue Skadoo" finishing move with the super-pheonix-hurricanrana (or the simple classic Flair throw off the top rope), a visit from God told Flair to pass the torch to SB.
Jack Doan: OK, next time I ref, I'm going to use my watch to keep track of the time we have left.
Tajiri moved his hands to the middle ropes in order to lift himself up in a hurry, as Coach had developed the perfect counter for the Tarantua.
Coach practiced the Taratula in the corner, while Tajiri debuted his new "Apeman" gimmick.
Taking a page out of Goku's book, Tajiri summoned the power of Garrison Cadeand everyone in the arena to make a giant Spirit Bomb to use on Coach.
Now is not the time to milk the python, Garrison.
The new Chris Jericho Pin the tail on the Donkey, board was great!
Trish: You've almost got it.
Trish: Hey, I didn't know we had boundaries!
*Giving Trish a taste of her own medicine.*
Chris: Is it in yet?
Eugene: That's the hair style I used to have when I wrestled!
The Human Chain Ladder to the Top of the Arena match wasn't going well.
Lita: Come on, Jack!
Victoria: We'll make it soon!
Jack: No, no. I don't want to.
Lita: C'mon Jack! I don't bite.
Jack: No, no. Don't want to.
Jack: I SAID I DON"T WANT TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Molly: Jack! You killed her!
Gail Kim: ....Oh my gra...good Lord.
Chris Benoit's heel turn was unexpected. He slwly lifted the trash can out of Orton's hands to protect him from Cactus Jack.
Mick: NO! NO! Don't roll it up!
Randy: Idiot bum head! Vince said if we don't roll it up after a match we'll gt fired!
Randy: AAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH! We've only got three minutes left!
As the fans sat there bored, Mick got an idea.
Mick: Lets' weld it on!
Another DBZ cameo, Mike Chiota gave his powers to Randy making him even more powerful!
Randy tried to use his new powers to tranform into a lizard man! It only half-worked.
Mike Chiota: Looked at the incoming Mick crossing his path, then looked at the $2 on the ground.
Mike: I think I can make this.
Batista was confused. Randy Orton's new powers forced batista's hand away from their usual post-match routine.
Realising that there are a lot of French-Canadian nuns, Eugene wrapped himself in the Quebec flag while he prayed for a better gimmick.
Hurricane was shocked at how effective that was. Not only was an INVISIBLE force LEVITATING the ref's hand, but Eugene started doing the Nature Boy Strut.
Hurricane: I gotta get me a flag.
Kane: I wanna turn!
Edge: No! It's my sock puppet!
Edge went insane. He looked at the hanging noose, then looked at Kane.
Kane's gimmick was ruined again, much to the bordeom of the fans. Using Edge's sock puppet, Kane used the Mandible Claw, taking Mick Foley's gimmick, and tapping his foot while funky music played, taking Grand Master Sexay's gimmick.
Chris Benoit with Video Camera: I just wanna get one shot of you laying down for me!
Backlash did end in a Screwjob. At the last minute Shawn Michaels swapped with Edge.
This was a different kind of Screwjob. Earl blocked Benoit's way to the ropes, pretending not to know as he was preoccupied by the "Rompa-Kastomp".
Earl: Can I screw you over now Chris? Please?
Earl Hebner looked innocent with his hands behind his back. Triple H and Chris Benoit stopped and stared. They knew what was coming next.
Chris Benoit hated the idea the creative team came up with. To make Triple H look good and not tap himself, they had Benoit "Temporarily forget" hot to do the Sharshooter, and accidently levitate Triple H to the top while he remembered how to do it and put it on Shawn Michaels.
This was an extremely strange position for Earl. He amused himself looking at Shawn's tights while Shawn struggled to counter.
As light from Heaven poured onto Benoit's Championship, Earl gulped and lowered his head to see Vince McMahon on stage with pink tutu referee attire pointed at it and then to Earl. What really caught Earl's eyes though were the cool new bossoms Chris had.
