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1) I'd ask Ric Flair if I could use his senior citizens benefits card to buy some cheap movie tickets.
2) [note:this works, I've done it on someone] I'd wait until right before Hardcore Holly was going to take a shower and I'd put a chicken broth cube in the shower head he was going to use. The cube disintegrates and he spends the rest of the day smelling mysteriously like chicken soup. Fifi would chase him around backstage and eventually, Big Show would eat him.
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