[Mr. Nerfect]

I don't know if you want to discuss other random gimmick repackaging and such here, but while watching SmackDown! this week, I had a really weird thought: I REALLY want Funaki to join The Straight-Edge Society. I don't even think he should join for the "drug free, alcohol free" thing; but just to "maximise his potential." CM Punk finds strength in numbers, and going after whatever minds he can could build up his ranks.

You just have CM Punk come out and cut a promo, talking about how he wants to save as many people as he can, and there is one man he wants to focus on tonight. He turns his attention to Funaki (who is in the back), and he says that he has lined up the production team to play Funaki's music, so he wants Funaki to do him the honour of coming out and hearing what he has to say. "Kung Fu Naki's" theme music hits, and Funaki comes out in dress clothes, looking a bit confused.

CM Punk cuts an epic promo about how Funaki was one of the most respected junior heavyweights in Japan when he came to the WWE, and he came over with such great hopes of conquering the west, but instead he has settled for a comfy paycheck. He ridicules Funaki for not being seen in months, and how he didn't even need to bring wrestling attire tonight because he knows he would not have been booked. Punk says that he is kept under contract because he is such a good competitor, and it'd be stupid to let him go, but Funaki himself has become complacement, and no longer strives to be anyone.

I dunno, that sort of shit. The idea is to break Funaki, and then get him angry at the WWE for "forgetting about him." Punk then offers Funaki a chance to be "reborn" under Straight-Edge, like Luke Gallows -- who was also going nowhere before he found Punk (cue Gallows taking off his cap and revealing his bald head). Funaki is then given the choice to join The Straight-Edge Society, and become relevant to the WWE Universe (ugh) again. Funaki accepts, as Todd Grisham and Matt Striker talk about how they have known Funaki as a fun loving guy for a long time, and Punk has altered that.

Funaki gets his head shaved, and there is a celebration by Serena and Gallows as Punk welcomes Funaki to a society that will not forget him and will not leave him behind. He says that Funaki needs to shed his past, so from now on he will be known as "Shoichi," to go back to a time before he was a joke. Punk reveals that they have had attire made up for him, and then give Funaki a new singlet with the SES logo on the front, and "Sho1chi" written on the side. His first assignment will be to "soften up" Rey Mysterio.

Shoichi can use CM Punk's entrance theme for his match against Mysterio, and he looks a little reluctant, even with his newly shaved head. He gets in the ring, and offers Rey his hand, as Matt Striker suggests that even though Shoichi is in The Straight-Edge Society, he remains the same respectful competitor at heart. Mysterio accepts the hand and the former Funaki cheap-shots him as Striker reverses himself "Whoa! Maybe not! I like this Shoichi!"

Shoichi starts the match off strong against Rey Mysterio, but Rey of course gets control, and manages to send Shoichi out of the ring with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. What would normally be reluctance by an out-matched Funaki can be converted into cowardice, as Shoichi does not want to get back in the ring immediately with Mysterio. He eventually gets control of the match, however, when CM Punk gets involved, and we get the usual heel control as Matt Striker talks about the power Shoichi has been granted by joining the SES. Mysterio makes a second comeback, and is about to win the match when the SES pull some more funky shit, and out of nowhere Shoichi hits a Superkick on Mysterio and actually gets the pin.

Funaki can start using his Superkick and calling it the "Straight-Edge Superkick" or something corny like that. You can give it a proper name. Shoichi can become a sort of "translator" for CM Punk, as reading up on Funaki's Wikipedia page, it says that along with Japanese and English, Funaki is semi-fluent in French, German, Portugese and Spanish. You can shed Funaki's "funny English speaking" image, and let him cut promos echoing Punk's message in several different languages.

The idea would not be to make Funaki a World Champion, or anything. But it would take a guy who has been under contract for something like twelve years, repackage him, and give him a consistent role on SmackDown! as a credible heel. When the time comes for him to leave the Straight-Edge Society, as well, who knows -- Funaki could even get a nice face push from it, as he reveals himself to be "Shoichi Funaki," a complete person and neither too fun-loving nor too dark.