Oh my God! "Night Court"'s Markie Post is back in action!
Invisible Leprechaun: "You've done grand, lass! Now ya know what ya have ta do! BURN THE RING DOWN! Burn 'em ALL!!!!"
She may be smiling, but inside she's crying... ever since she mistook Rhyno's glue for toothpaste.
Trish couldn't stand Kane's awful redition of Bizet's "Carmen". Lita, though, was fortunately tone deaf.
Gotta hand it to Kane: even after the ebola virus had devoured half his face, he's still smiling.
Randy learns the hard way why Val would always emphasize the "INTER" in "INTERcontinental Title."
Coach: "It's true! I AM the Rock! Watch this. What's your name?"
Eugene: "Eu-..."
Coach: "IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!!!"
Eugene: "Oh....."
Eugene: "Sweet Jesus! Two Rocks!"
Rock: "I am the real People's Champion, and I'll prove it by freestylin' like a motherf***er!"
Eugene: "But the Rock doesn't..."
... and so ... will Eugene ever find out the real Rock? Stay tuned!
Fan: "Hey, Rocky! Nice tattoo!"
Rock: "Tattoo? What... Oh, those kids their damn markers!"
Tonight on RAW, the wrestlers re-enact the invasion of France.
All Wrestlers Except Evolution: "WE SURRENDER!"
HHH: "And who's that waste?"
Orton: "That's the Hurricane, sir, one of the carbon blobs who works in sector 7G."
HHH: "Hurricane, eh? Excellent."
Kane was incredibly thrilled when he found the last gold ticket for the tour of the chocolate factory!
HBK: "Shawn Michaels is dead, my friend. You can call me... the Jok-AH!"
OR
HBK: "Please. Do not hate me because I am beautiful."
Seconds later, HHH knew should have listened to his Mom when she said that if he kept making faces, it would freeze like that.