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**loopydate** · 05-21-2004, 07:40 PM

Yep, so I've been seriously slacking the last couple of weeks. It doesn't help that SmackDown's been pre-empted so much lately for the Pistons and that I had literally no interest in Judgment Day. However, since I have sort of missed the caption game, I'm going to try to get all caught up...starting with five days ago. Here goes.

OH! I almost forgot. I haven't read anyone else's yet, so sorry if I rip someone off.

Burning crosses in the background... being lifted by a pasty white good ol' boy... Rey knew he wasn't in San Diego anymore.

The aftermath of the ill-advised Lita run-in.

In an unprecedented move, Vince McMahon actually remembered a gimmick he started last year and quickly abandoned. Unfortunately for RVD, that meant that HE was now the "Mabel" of "Men on a Mission 2004!"

Lex Luthor HATED borrowing the microphone after Mr. Freeze. That fucker was almost as bad as Rhyno...

Torrie's reaction to seeing "VH1 and Blender's 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs" list.

TORRIE: But...I LIKED "Barbie Girl!"

Dawn Marie - The latest victim of the WWE Glass Wall (Patent Pending).

RIKISHI: Mmmmm...
TORRIE: (cough) The things I'll do to stay on TV...

MORDECAI: So come on down to Crazy Mordecai's House of Crosses! Perfect for showing your faith or for those pesky crucifixions. How can I sell crosses so low? I'm craaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy!

Mordecai, still the Undisputed WWE Hold Your Breath Till You Turn Purple Champion.

MORDECAI: Say, friend, I couldn't help but notice you're stuck using an old-fashioned invisible crucifix. Lemme just help you down and see if I have something in the back for ya.

Next up on "Pedantic Republican Judgment"...heterosexual women and their friendship with homosexual men!

Hardcore Holly won't even sell having his nipple bitten off.

RICO: Yay! We won!
JACKIE: Uh...
CHARLIE: Why is that sniper wearing a "G.L.A.A.D." t-sh--oh, shit.

After Jacqueline's clothes fell off, Chavo decided to give her a piggyback ride to the locker room and away from the prying eyes. Ever the prankster, though, he gave everybody one last good look on the way out.

CHAVO: Hehe. I'm the champ, bro!
CLASSIC: I wonder if I could convince Vince to let me win this on Thursday... Nah.

Much like Rey Mysterio tricking Nunzio a couple of months back, Rene Dupree manages to convince John Cena that if he looked very closely, "8 Mile" was playing on the palm of his hand.

RENE: Sacre bleu! I 'ave become invisibly crucified again!
MORDECAI: Say, friend...

Dupree desperately needed to counter the F-U, but couldn't figure out how...until he saw John's hernia.

WALKER: Are you sure this is where I can find him?
O.P.: Oompa loompa doompity doo...

Booker T was so desperate to remain in the main-event picture, he even agreed to self-castration.

Undertaker was getting old. He used to be able to get up and change the lightbulbs all by himself, with no support.

REF: Good, good. You ALMOST had it there. Now, next time, fall BACKWARDS. Then you'll have this whole double-arm DDT thing down pat.
BOOKER: My shoulders...

REF: Good, good. You ALMOST had it there. Now, next time, swing a little more to your left. Then you'll have this whole low-blow thing down pat.

VINCE: Hey, Mark! Stop doing cocaine during your matches!
UT: (sniff) I wasn't!

Don't you just hate it when you almost have the match one and some insensitive Jedi throws a lightsaber through your nose?

UT: (cough cough wheeze)
VINCE: All right! Good punch! Now do another one!

EDDIE: I know you liked Troy and all, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this, ese.
JBL: Why not? This is how they used to wrestle in Ancient Greece!

JBL's "Chinups on the edge of the glass ceiling" was, surprisingly, the most over taunt on SmackDown since "You can't see me."

Man! That is one hardcore noogie!

JBL looked on in horror as the Push Timer reached single digits.

Are rest holds really necessary when your opponent has passed out from blood loss?

This was the last time Vince would let Quentin Tarantino book a pay-per-view main event.

Eddie didn't realize it, but Brian Hebner had become possessed by the Shoulder Biting Demon.

JBL: He let me keep my pathetic life for two reasons...

Eddie Guerrero - STILL the WWE Platoon Impersonation Champion.

05-21-2004, 07:40 PM	#34
loopydate FIT Challenge Slag People Posts: 13,816	Yep, so I've been seriously slacking the last couple of weeks. It doesn't help that SmackDown's been pre-empted so much lately for the Pistons and that I had literally no interest in Judgment Day. However, since I have sort of missed the caption game, I'm going to try to get all caught up...starting with five days ago. Here goes. OH! I almost forgot. I haven't read anyone else's yet, so sorry if I rip someone off. Burning crosses in the background... being lifted by a pasty white good ol' boy... Rey knew he wasn't in San Diego anymore. The aftermath of the ill-advised Lita run-in. In an unprecedented move, Vince McMahon actually remembered a gimmick he started last year and quickly abandoned. Unfortunately for RVD, that meant that HE was now the "Mabel" of "Men on a Mission 2004!" Lex Luthor HATED borrowing the microphone after Mr. Freeze. That fucker was almost as bad as Rhyno... Torrie's reaction to seeing "VH1 and Blender's 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs" list. TORRIE: But...I LIKED "Barbie Girl!" Dawn Marie - The latest victim of the WWE Glass Wall (Patent Pending). RIKISHI: Mmmmm... TORRIE: (cough) The things I'll do to stay on TV... MORDECAI: So come on down to Crazy Mordecai's House of Crosses! Perfect for showing your faith or for those pesky crucifixions. How can I sell crosses so low? I'm craaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy! Mordecai, still the Undisputed WWE Hold Your Breath Till You Turn Purple Champion. MORDECAI: Say, friend, I couldn't help but notice you're stuck using an old-fashioned invisible crucifix. Lemme just help you down and see if I have something in the back for ya. Next up on "Pedantic Republican Judgment"...heterosexual women and their friendship with homosexual men! Hardcore Holly won't even sell having his nipple bitten off. RICO: Yay! We won! JACKIE: Uh... CHARLIE: Why is that sniper wearing a "G.L.A.A.D." t-sh--oh, shit. After Jacqueline's clothes fell off, Chavo decided to give her a piggyback ride to the locker room and away from the prying eyes. Ever the prankster, though, he gave everybody one last good look on the way out. CHAVO: Hehe. I'm the champ, bro! CLASSIC: I wonder if I could convince Vince to let me win this on Thursday... Nah. Much like Rey Mysterio tricking Nunzio a couple of months back, Rene Dupree manages to convince John Cena that if he looked very closely, "8 Mile" was playing on the palm of his hand. RENE: Sacre bleu! I 'ave become invisibly crucified again! MORDECAI: Say, friend... Dupree desperately needed to counter the F-U, but couldn't figure out how...until he saw John's hernia. WALKER: Are you sure this is where I can find him? O.P.: Oompa loompa doompity doo... Booker T was so desperate to remain in the main-event picture, he even agreed to self-castration. Undertaker was getting old. He used to be able to get up and change the lightbulbs all by himself, with no support. REF: Good, good. You ALMOST had it there. Now, next time, fall BACKWARDS. Then you'll have this whole double-arm DDT thing down pat. BOOKER: My shoulders... REF: Good, good. You ALMOST had it there. Now, next time, swing a little more to your left. Then you'll have this whole low-blow thing down pat. VINCE: Hey, Mark! Stop doing cocaine during your matches! UT: (sniff) I wasn't! Don't you just hate it when you almost have the match one and some insensitive Jedi throws a lightsaber through your nose? UT: (cough cough wheeze) VINCE: All right! Good punch! Now do another one! EDDIE: I know you liked Troy and all, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this, ese. JBL: Why not? This is how they used to wrestle in Ancient Greece! JBL's "Chinups on the edge of the glass ceiling" was, surprisingly, the most over taunt on SmackDown since "You can't see me." Man! That is one hardcore noogie! JBL looked on in horror as the Push Timer reached single digits. Are rest holds really necessary when your opponent has passed out from blood loss? This was the last time Vince would let Quentin Tarantino book a pay-per-view main event. Eddie didn't realize it, but Brian Hebner had become possessed by the Shoulder Biting Demon. JBL: He let me keep my pathetic life for two reasons... Eddie Guerrero - STILL the WWE Platoon Impersonation Champion.