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And no, Stark is nowhere near as compelling from a character arc standpoint. There's no loss or consequence for him or his actions. His weapons are sold to bad guys. He stops that. His idea is hijacked by bad guys. Be stops that. A guy be left hanging seeks revenge and tries to punish Pepper only to have Pepper be his demise, and Tony goes on happily ever after without any real loss or consequence to anything he did. They're not the same.
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Here's the flaw in simplifying a story to dismiss an argument:
"So like, his parent get killed like millions of other orphans but he's special so he becomes some vigilante. He has money to make a suit and weapons and a cool car. He beats up crazy people but he doesn't kill, except he let's his mentor die for reasons. Then a clown comes along and ruins any chance of a social life and he retires. Then a terrorists comes along and he comes out of retirement. He gets thrown in a hole, he climbs out, beats the other guy. Fakes his death and gives his stuff to a cop. Eh."
You see, it's disingenuous to the narrative and can be done to literally anything. I can present the best movies ever in such a fashion.