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Old 09-27-2004, 08:57 PM   #4
loopydate
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HHH: I'd like to welcome all of you here to the commemoration of my 300th World Title reign...



RIC: Wanna ride Space Mountain?
TRISH: No!
RIC: Splash Mountain?
TRISH: No!
RIC: Big Thunder Mountain?
TRISH: No!
RIC: The Country Bear Jamboree?
TRISH: What the--?



HHH: (squeaky voice) Hey, congratulations on winning the title again, Hunter! (normal voice) Thanks, Mister Lefty! (squeaky voice) You're the greatest wrestler ever!
TRISH: Why the hell is he talking to his hand?
SHAWN: I don't know. It was Vince's idea.
VINCE: This guy is gold!



DAVE: Thanks for leading me to my seat, Ric.
RIC: You're welcome, but now aren't you sorry you didn't listen to me?
DAVE: I always thought that "You'll go blind" was just an expression...



DAVE: Ric, you're such a dick! You told me this was the Taboo Tuesday press conference, not a T.A.T.U. concert!



"Trishtanka" was not exactly the best way to reach out to the Native American population.



SHAWN: ...so ah grabbed 'er boobies an'...
COACH: Dude, his Clinton impression owns!



DAVE: So, I'm glad that I could get this opportunity to let all the WWE fans know that I'm not just a monosyllabic ape who dresses in short shorts. I'm a sophisticated thirty-something man of intelligence.
REPORTER: Well, we're glad to set the record straight.
DAVE: Straight? What, you think I'm gay or something? RAAAR! DAVE SMASH! MUST CHANGE INTO TIGHTS!

(Again, way too much set-up, not nearly enough pay-off. I'm sorry.)



MAN ON RIGHT: Well, what do you think so far, Mister Helmsley?
HHH: Not bad, not bad... Except that I wanted a SOLID GOLD HOUSE! Why the hell is the ceiling still white! Vince is going to hear about this!
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